Download or read book Why Couples Fight written by Mira Kirshenbaum and published by Citadel Press. This book was released on 2021-01-26 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: How do two well-meaning people who genuinely care about each other end up in a damaged, unsatisfying relationship? Every couple faces conflict. Most of the time, the root of the problem is that we’re not getting our needs met. And most of the time, we first try to remedy this with reasonable requests—or hints—and a kind tone. But when that fails, we feel disempowered, which leads to sighs, eye rolls, silences, subtle put-downs, insults, and even threats. These are power moves. And while we often use them without realizing it and without intention, the result is the same—our partner feels disempowered and will try to re-empower themselves. And so the endless, and endlessly destructive, dynamic takes hold. Relationship expert Mira Kirshenbaum, bestselling author of Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay, reveals a better way: a three-step method for conflict-free problem solving. By recognizing each partner’s power moves, we can instead find mutually satisfying ways to heal our hurts and meet each other’s needs. Non-judgmental, compassionate, and wise, this is an indispensable guide to help couples end the negative cycle and get back to the loving understanding that brought them together in the first place. “Mira Kirshenbaum’s words of wisdom are an inspiration to everyone who reads them.” —Deepak Chopra

Download or read book Too Good to Leave Too Bad to Stay written by Mira Kirshenbaum and published by Penguin. This book was released on 1997-07-01 with total page 305 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: There are many books that promise to help you fix a bad relationship. This groundbreaking bestseller is the first one to help you choose whether you should even try—or if you need to go. Psychotherapist Mira Kirshenbaum draws on years of research and her work with real-life couples to help you make the right decision. She shows you how to diagnose your unique situation with self-analysis and questions like these, which get to the very heart of your problems: • What sins are forgivable and which ones are unpardonable? • Is your partner questioning your opinions to the point where you doubt yourself? • What is your sex life really like, and how important is it? • Is there real love left between you, and how does it stack up against all that you find unlovable? Mira Kirshenbaum provides expert guidelines that are the key to making all your choices, concrete steps that you can implement right now, and the ultimate way to determine your personal bottom line—what you need to be happy. This remarkably insightful and probing guide offers advice that lets you see the truth about your relationship—and with wisdom and compassion, it helps you act with the confidence of knowing that whether you decide to go or stay, you are doing the very best thing.

Download or read book Magnetic Partners written by Stephen Betchen and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2010-05-18 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Do you and your partner argue about the same things over and over again? Are you often confused about why your partner is so angry with you? Are things getting worse and worse even though you’ve tried everything you can think of to make them better? In this breakthrough guide to repairing romantic relationships, therapist and marriage researcher Dr. Stephen Betchen presents a powerful new explanation of what leads to this kind of escalating conflict in couples and how you can repair your relationship and find a whole new level of happiness. Based on his extensive experience as a couples’ therapist, Dr. Betchen has discovered that the prevailing idea that opposites attract is wrong. Instead, one of the strongest forces that attracts people to one another is that they share a hidden, inner conflict in their lives—an unconscious struggle within themselves that each of them developed growing up—which he calls a "master conflict." The fact that a couple shares a master conflict acts as an almost magnetic force of attraction, but, over time, master conflicts often begin to push a pair apart—many of the very things you most appreciated about each other start to grate on you, producing increasing hostility. The good news is that by identifying the master conflict that you share, you and your partner can take the steps to break the cycle of fighting and come to a new place of understanding and happiness in your relationship. Often, just the realization that you have this hidden conflict acts as a powerful cure, allowing you to appreciate each other once again and to be empathetic about the things that have been irritating you both. From his years of work with couples, Betchen has identified the nineteen most common master conflicts—such as getting your needs met vs. caretaking; giving vs. withholding; commitment vs. freedom; power vs. passivity—and for each he provides vivid stories of couples who have struggled with them, as well as simple tests that help you to: • Identify the core master conflict that is causing your relationship problems • Understand the origins of your conflict and how it drew you to your partner • Diagnose how the conflict is now pushing you apart • Come to new terms with the conflict to save your relationship As Dr. Betchen writes, knowledge of a master conflict is power, and Magnetic Partners is an empowering guide that will help you not only to identify and control your master conflict, but also to bring your relationship to a new level based on deeper understanding, ultimately leading to greater fulfillment and long-term resilience. Partners

Download or read book What Makes Love Last written by John Gottman and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-09-10 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "One of the foremost relationship experts at work today offers creative insight on building trust and avoiding betrayal, helping readers to decode the mysteries of healthy love and relationships"--

Download or read book Everybody Fights written by Kim Holderness and published by Thomas Nelson. This book was released on 2021-03-30 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A USA Today and Wall Street Journal bestseller! Learn how to fight better and end your arguments with your partner feeling closer, more loved, and better understood. We take our cars in for oil changes. We mow our lawns and pull weeds. Why don't we do maintenance on our marriages? This relationship is the most important one we will ever have, so why not get better at it? For the last several years, Penn and Kim Holderness of The Holderness Family have done the hard maintenance and the research to learn how to fight better. With the help of their marriage coach Dr. Christopher Edmonston, they break down their biggest (and in some cases, funniest) fights. How did a question about chicken wings turn into a bra fight (no, not a bar fight or a bra fight)? How did a roll of toilet paper lead to tears, resentment, and a stint in the guest bedroom? With their trademark sense of humor and complete vulnerability, Penn and Kim share their 10 most common Fight Fails and how to combat them. Throughout the book, they offer scripts for how to start, continue, and successfully close hard conversations. Couples will emerge equipped to engage and understand, not do battle—and maybe laugh a little more along the way. In Everybody Fights, couples will learn how to: Use "magic words" for healthy conflict resolution Address unspoken and unrealistic expectations Banish the three Ds of unhealthy communication—distraction, denial, and delay Carry individual baggage while helping your partner deal with theirs Penn and Kim want you to know you're not alone. Everybody fights. Marriage is messy. Marriage is work. But marriage is worth it. Fight for it!

Download or read book Fight Your Way to a Better Marriage written by Greg Smalley and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-07-02 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this counter intuitive book, author Dr. Greg Smalley maintains that fighting is actually good for a marriage. Couples will learn how to fight their way to a better marriage, using the skills, concepts, and exercises shared in this remarkable book.

Download or read book I Love You But I Don t Trust You written by Mira Kirshenbaum and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2012-02-07 with total page 305 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A guide to restoring trust in broken relationships from a renowed couple’s therapist. Is my relationship worth saving? Will the trust ever come back? How can things be good between us again? Whether broken trust is due to daily dishonesties, a monumental betrayal, or even a history of hurts from the past, it can put a relationship at risk. This is the first book to show you exactly what to do to restore trust in your relationship, regardless of how it was damaged. In this complete guide, couples therapist Mira Kirshenbaum will also help you understand the stages by which trust strengthens when the rebuilding process is allowed to take place. And you will learn how the two of you can avoid the mistakes that prevent healing and discover how to feel secure with each other again.

Download or read book Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage written by Focus on the Family and published by NavPress. This book was released on 2016-01-01 with total page 189 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Every couple who wants a happy marriage will appreciate the revitalizing secrets in Crazy Little Thing Called Marriage. In it, Dr. Greg and Erin Smalley explore the traits of a healthy and thriving marriage. Based on research of thousands of strong couples across the country, the twelve essential elements outlined are not only biblically based; they also chart a course for a romantic adventure that will last a lifetime. With practical advice and stories from their own marriage and counseling experiences, Greg and Erin guide couples to find ways to work around roadblocks in their current relationship and to intentionally create communication patterns that will take them to emotionally safe places. Yes, marriage can have its twists and turns. But the detours don’t necessarily have to lead couples off course. Greg and Erin help couples map out a journey for their marriages so that they can enjoy the passionate and intimate relationship that God has promised.

Download or read book The Heart of the Fight written by Judith Wright and published by New Harbinger Publications. This book was released on 2016-02-02 with total page 186 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Every couple fights—it’s how you fight that can determine the success of your relationship. This book teaches you to look beyond what you and your partner fight about, and discover the core issues that undermine your relationship. In the midst of a disagreement, many couples ask themselves, “What are we really fighting about?” Sound familiar? As it turns out, breakups and divorce don’t happen because couples fight, they happen because of how couples fight. In this much-needed book, Judith and Bob Wright—two married counselors and coaches with over thirty years of experience helping couples learn how to fight well—present their tried-and-true methods for exploring the emotions that underlie many relationship fights. In this unique guide, you’ll learn how to use disagreements as an opportunity to deepen your understanding of your partner, bring more intimacy to the relationship, strengthen your bond, and really learn from the conflicts and tensions that occur between you. You’ll also learn how to navigate the fifteen most common fights couples have, including “the blame game,” “dueling over dollars,” “If you really loved me, you’d…,” “told-you-so’s,” and more. If you’re ready to start fighting for your love, rather than against it, this book will show you how.

Download or read book Stop the Fight An Illustrated Guide for Couples How to Break Free from the 12 Most Common Arguments and Build a Relationship That Lasts written by Michelle Brody and published by The Experiment, LLC. This book was released on 2015-10-27 with total page 330 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This Illustrated Guide for Couples Ends 12 Hurtful Arguments Once and for All! Conflict within relationships is complex and challenging to overcome. In her 20 years of working with couples, clinical psychologist Michelle Brody found a way to make change simpler. Her secret: clear and lighthearted illustrations that help couples literally see what’s driving their battles and blocking their bond, so they can chart a course together to stop the fights. The Money Fight “You’re such a cheapskate!” “You spend way too much!” The Sex Fight “Not tonight. I’m not in the mood.” “You haven’t been in the mood since 1975!” The Parenting Differences Fight “You’re too overprotective!” “Is skydiving next?!” Stop the Fight! includes more than 300 illustrations to help couples unlock the destructive cycles that drive the birthday fight, the difficult relatives fight, and other familiar battles. Going beyond common relationship advice, the tools in Stop the Fight! will help you understand the big picture and create lifelong change.

Download or read book We ve Had This Fight Before written by Claudia Grauf-Grounds and published by Honors Press. This book was released on 2017-03-14 with total page 158 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Fierce Marriage written by Ryan Frederick and published by Baker Books. This book was released on 2018-04-17 with total page 221 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Ryan and Selena Frederick were newlyweds when they landed in Switzerland to pursue Selena's dream of training horses. Neither of them knew at the time that Ryan was living out a death sentence brought on by a worsening genetic heart defect. Soon it became clear he needed major surgery that could either save his life--or result in his death on the operating table. The young couple prepared for the worst. When Ryan survived, they both realized that they still had a future together. But the near loss changed the way they saw all that would lie ahead. They would live and love fiercely, fighting for each other and for a Christ-centered marriage, every step of the way. Fierce Marriage is their story, but more than that, it is a call for married couples to put God first in their relationship, to measure everything they do and say to each other against what Christ did for them, and to see marriage not just as a relationship they should try to keep healthy but also as one worth fighting for in every situation. With the gospel as their foundation, Ryan and Selena offer hope and practical help for common struggles in marriage, including communication problems, sexual frustration, financial stress, family tension, screen-time disconnection, and unrealistic expectations.

Download or read book No More Fighting written by Alicia Muñoz and published by Zephyros Press. This book was released on 2018-12-04 with total page 286 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: All couples fight―but a little guidance goes a long way to tackling the issues that trigger fights in the first place. No More Fighting offers couples fast and effective strategies to overcome common relationship problems and build lasting love together. In just 20 minutes per week, couples will learn how to effectively speak and listen to each other as they confront critical relationship issues. From reconciling different values to navigating intimacy issues and everything in between, No More Fighting gives you the skills you need to fight less and love each other more. --

Download or read book Love More Fight Less Communication Skills Every Couple Needs written by Gina Senarighi PhD, CPC and published by Zeitgeist. This book was released on 2020-07-28 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Learn to communicate effectively, meaningfully, and lovingly with your partner--even in tense situations. Conflict is part of every relationship, even the healthiest ones. The key to a long-lasting relationship isn't avoiding fights, but rather seeing them as opportunities to work together. In her book, Gottman-certified relationship coach Dr. Gina Senarighi gives us the tools and strategies we need to communicate effectively, rebuild trust, and repair past hurts. Love More, Fight Less features: 30 COMMUNICATION SKILLS AND ACTIVITIES for building self-awareness, identifying and interrupting emotional reactivity, eliminating judgment, separating thoughts from feelings, and more 29 COMMON PITFALLS IN RELATIONSHIPS around issues of intimacy, career, finances, family and home matters, and friendships with other people--and how to navigate them STEP-BY-STEP GUIDANCE AND EXPERT INSIGHT to help you transform your relationship's conflict patterns by integrating effective communication skills This relationship workbook is for couples who want to learn new skills and build a solid foundation for working through conflicts and moving forward in ways that strengthen their bonds.

Download or read book Finding the Hero in Your Husband Revisited written by Juli Slattery and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-10-19 with total page 158 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Women know how to work hard at marriage. Often their efforts end up sabotaging rather than building intimacy. Do you want to understand why? In this rewrite of her bestseller Finding the Hero in Your Husband, acclaimed Christian clinical psychologist and speaker Dr. Juli Slattery gently guides women through topics that are inherently woven into every imperfect marriage. Finding the Hero in Your Husband, Revisited, challenges misconceptions and outright misinformation that have misguided women for decades. In truth, women have power in marriage-but they don't often know how to use it. Illustrated with insightful real-life case examples, this book is both an educational resource as well as a practical "how-to" guide for navigating everyday trials as well as deeper difficulties. Juli offers understandable explanations of God's design, healthy expectations that re-frame experiences, and relatable applications that women of faith can practice to influence their marriage and deepen their relationship with God. Finding the Hero in Your Husband, Revisited, will help you more clearly see and encourage the hero within your husband by examining your own heart. Book jacket.

Download or read book The State of Affairs written by Esther Perel and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2017-10-10 with total page 321 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "A fresh look at infidelity, broadening the focus from the havoc it wreaks within a committed relationship to consider also why people do it, what it means to them, and why breaking up is the expected response to duplicity — but not necessarily the wisest one.” — LA Review of Books From iconic couples’ therapist and bestselling author of Mating in Captivity comes a provocative and controversial look at infidelity with practical, honest, and empathetic advice for how to move beyond it. An affair: it can rob a couple of their relationship, their happiness, their very identity. And yet, this extremely common human experience is so poorly understood. What are we to make of this time-honored taboo—universally forbidden yet universally practiced? Why do people cheat—even those in happy marriages? Why does an affair hurt so much? When we say infidelity, what exactly do we mean? Do our romantic expectations of marriage set us up for betrayal? Is there such a thing as an affair-proof marriage? Is it possible to love more than one person at once? Can an affair ever help a marriage? Perel weaves real-life case stories with incisive psychological and cultural analysis in this fast-paced and compelling book. For the past ten years, Perel has traveled the globe and worked with hundreds of couples who have grappled with infidelity. Betrayal hurts, she writes, but it can be healed. An affair can even be the doorway to a new marriage—with the same person. With the right approach, couples can grow and learn from these tumultuous experiences, together or apart. Affairs, she argues, have a lot to teach us about modern relationships—what we expect, what we think we want, and what we feel entitled to. They offer a unique window into our personal and cultural attitudes about love, lust, and commitment. Through examining illicit love from multiple angles, Perel invites readers into an honest, enlightened, and entertaining exploration of modern marriage in its many variations. Fiercely intelligent, The State of Affairs provides a daring framework for understanding the intricacies of love and desire. As Perel observes, “Love is messy; infidelity more so. But it is also a window, like no other, into the crevices of the human heart.”

Download or read book From Chaos to Connection written by Lori Epting and published by Belle Isle Books. This book was released on 2020-09-09 with total page 262 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Marriage counselor Lori Epting shares both her own and her clients' stories of marital conflict, compromise, and forgiveness to help guide couples from separation and heartache to connection, security, and trust.