Download or read book Top 10 Ways To Kill Your Mom written by Steve Hudgins and published by . This book was released on 2020-02-20 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Imagine the look on your mom's face when they see you reading this book! If you're really looking for the top 10 ways to kill your mom, stop what you're doing and seek psychiatric help immediately! For the rest of you, bring some humor to your day! This book is all about the reaction you get when someone sees it sitting on your bed stand or if they witness you actually reading it! Take it on a trip. Chill out with it in the living room. The creative possibilities of being seen with this book are endless! There is a funny little story within the book, but that's secondary to the response you'll get when people catch a glimpse of you with this! Great for a practical joke or some light hearted black humor, this prank book will surely bring a demented smile to the faces of those who share the same sick sense of humor as you. Also makes a great gag gift for a mom, dad, relatives, white elephant, all that kind of stuff! Fun for the whole family!

Download or read book Top 10 Ways To Kill Your Parents written by Steve Hudgins and published by . This book was released on 2020-02-20 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Imagine the look on your parent's face when they see you reading this book! If you're really looking for the top 10 ways to kill your parents, stop what you're doing and seek psychiatric help immediately! For the rest of you, bring some humor to your day! This book is all about the reaction you get when someone sees it sitting on your bed stand or if they witness you actually reading it! Take it on a trip. Chill out with it in the living room. The creative possibilities of being seen with this book are endless! There is a funny little story within the book, but that's secondary to the response you'll get when people catch a glimpse of you with this! Great for a practical joke or some light hearted black humor, this prank book will surely bring a demented smile to the faces of those who share the same sick sense of humor as you. Also makes a great gag gift for a mom, dad, relatives, white elephant, all that kind of stuff! Sick fun for the whole family!

Download or read book Top 10 Ways To Kill Your Kids written by Steve Hudgins and published by . This book was released on 2020-02-20 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Imagine the look on your kid's face when they see you reading this book! If you're really looking for the top 10 ways to kill your kids, stop what you're doing and seek psychiatric help immediately! For the rest of you, bring some humor to your day! This book is all about the reaction you get when someone sees it sitting on your bed stand or if they witness you actually reading it! Take it on a trip. Chill out with it in the living room. The creative possibilities of being seen with this book are endless! There is a funny little story within the book, but that's secondary to the response you'll get when people catch a glimpse of you with this! Great for a practical joke or some light hearted black humor, this prank book will surely bring a demented smile to the faces of those who share the same sick sense of humor as you. Also makes a great gag gift for a mom, dad, relatives, white elephant, all that kind of stuff! Sick fun for the whole family!

Download or read book Top 10 Ways To Kill Your Sister written by Steve Hudgins and published by . This book was released on 2020-02-21 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Imagine the look on your sister's face when they see you reading this book. If you're really looking for the top 10 ways to kill your sister, stop what you are doing and seek psychiatric help immediately! For the rest of you, bring some dark humor to your day! This book is all about the reaction you get when someone sees it sitting on your desk or if they witness you actually reading it! Take it on a trip. Chill out with it in the living room. There is a funny little story within the book, but that's secondary to the response you'll get when people catch a glimpse of you with this! Great for a practical joke or some light hearted black humor, this prank book will surely bring a demented smile to the faces of those who share the same morbid sense of humor as you. Also makes a great gag gift for a brother, sister, relatives or anyone who enjoys some sick death humor. Fun for the whole dysfunctional family!

Download or read book New Ways to Kill Your Mother written by Colm Toibin and published by Emblem Editions. This book was released on 2012-05-01 with total page 315 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this fascinating, informative, and entertaining collection, internationally acclaimed, award-winning author Colm Tóibín turns his attention to the intricacies of family relationships in literature and writing. In pieces that range from the importance of aunts (and the death of parents) in the English nineteenth-century novel to the relationship between fathers and sons in the writing of James Baldwin and Barack Obama, Colm Tóibín illuminates not only the intimate connections between writers and their families but also, with wit and rare tenderness, articulates the great joy of reading their work. In the piece on the Notebooks of Tennessee Williams, Tóibín reveals an artist "alone and deeply fearful and unusually selfish" and one profoundly tormented by his sister's mental illness. Through the relationship between W.B. Yeats and his father, or Thomas Mann and his children, or J.M. Synge and his mother, Tóibín examines a world of family relations, richly comic or savage in its implications. In Roddy Doyle's writing on his parents we see an Ireland reinvented. From the dreams and nightmares of John Cheever's journals Tóibín makes flesh this darkly comic misanthrope and his relationship to his wife and his children.The majority of these pieces were previously published in the Londron Review of Books, the New York Review Review of Books, and the Dublin Review. Three of the thirteen pieces have never appeared before.

Download or read book Top 10 Ways To Kill Your Dad written by Steve Hudgins and published by . This book was released on 2020-02-20 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Imagine the look on your dad's face when they see you reading this book! If you're really looking for the top 10 ways to kill your dad, stop what you're doing and seek psychiatric help immediately! For the rest of you, bring some humor to your day! This book is all about the reaction you get when someone sees it sitting on your bed stand or if they witness you actually reading it! Take it on a trip. Chill out with it in the living room. The creative possibilities of being seen with this book are endless! There is a funny little story within the book, but that's secondary to the response you'll get when people catch a glimpse of you with this! Great for a practical joke or some light hearted black humor, this prank book will surely bring a demented smile to the faces of those who share the same sick sense of humor as you. Also makes a great gag gift for a mom, dad, relatives, white elephant, all that kind of stuff! Sick fun for the whole family!

Download or read book How to Murder Your Mother In Law written by Dorothy Cannell and published by Alibi. This book was released on 2012-03-07 with total page 289 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The award-winning author of Femmes Fatal and The Thin Woman serves up the ubiquitous mother-in-law joke family style­—with death for the punch line. . . . Nothing like a live-in mother-in-law to reduce a woman to the role of junior housemaid. That’s what Ellie Haskell discovers when her husband’s parents have a row in the midst of their anniversary dinner, and mother Magdalene seeks refuge in Ellie’s guest bedroom. Suddenly Ellie is being driven round the bend by the woman’s constant demands. Thank goodness for the other wives who also suffer the age-old mother-in-law curse. A chance meeting down at the Dark Horse pub finds them trading horror stories, and soon they’re mixing gin and tonics with homicidal fantasies—a soupçon of poison here, a broken brake line there. All very therapeutic and no harm intended. At least, that’s what Ellie thinks. . . . Praise for How to Murder Your Mother-in-Law “Vintage Cannell. . . . Dorothy Cannell is a master at creating wildly ludicrous characters and hilarious plots. . . . Her latest Ellie Haskell adventure only enhances her reputation.”—Booklist “Side-splitting!”—Rendezvous “Toxic and hilarious.”—Publishers Weekly

Download or read book How Not to Kill Your Baby written by Jacob Sager Weinstein and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2012-03-20 with total page 137 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "This laugh-out-loud hilarious book is mandatory reading for parents, and should be taught in schools as the "cautionary tale" portion of Sex Ed. Run don't walk to buy it, and if you're a baby with lethal parents, crawl don't roll." --Rob Kutner (writer, The Daily Show, Conan, The Future According To Me) "Unlike babies themselves, copies of Jacob Sager Weinstein's book can be bought and sold on the open market. Buy two and bring joy and laughter to the lives of a copy-less couple." --Jose Arroyo (writer, Conan) "The "s-a-g-e" in Jacob's middle moniker indicates exactly that. He is a whimsically wise and hysterically funny fellow whom any child (or book buying adult) would be wise to listen to." --Dennis Miller "If you don't buy this book and then your baby dies, how are you going to feel? Pretty bad, I imagine." --Larry Doyle (writer, I Love You Beth Cooper; Go, Mutants!; The Simpsons) Have you ever read a parenting book that left you feeling inadequate and/or terrified? In other words, have you ever read any parenting book whatsoever? If so, you need How Not To Kill Your Baby, a hilarious parody of every fear-mongering, crazy-making pregnancy and parenting manual you've ever cringed over. Just consider the following advice: * "As you know if you have ever seen someone give birth in a movie or television show, all newborns emerge with adorable round faces, pudgy limbs, and twinkling eyes. If, by contrast, the nurse hands you a tiny, squawling creature with the face of an old man and skin covered in goo, hand it back immediately. There has clearly been some sort of mixup with a nearby ward for senile midgets." * "It's essential that you keep careful track of your baby's every bodily function. That way, when she is president of the United States and a paranoid-minded conspiracy movement springs up denying her eligibility for the position, you will have documentary proof that she did, in fact, poop on U.S. soil at 8:23AM on February 23." * "When choosing a nursery school, make sure to visit first, and ask the teachers about their educational philosophies. Then ask about their criminal records. If they insist they have none, you may need to keep asking, perhaps while shining a bright light in their face. Also, take their fingerprints, then follow them home from a discreet distance and go through their trash. Oh, and don't forget to thank them for their dedication to helping the young!" * "It is easy to adjust your parenting techniques as your children grow: simply do and say the exact same things, but raise your voice by one decibel for every year of your child's age." How Not To Kill Your Baby is printed on child-safe, 100% piranha-free paper, and bound without the use of exploding staples. You'll get no such promise from What To Expect When You're Expecting. How Not To Kill Your Baby is the book for you... unless you're some kind of baby-hating creep who wants to parent all wrong.

Download or read book Barry Sonnenfeld Call Your Mother written by Barry Sonnenfeld and published by Hachette Books. This book was released on 2020-03-10 with total page 368 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: **A New York Times Editor's Choice selection!** This outrageous and hilarious memoir follows a film and television director’s life, from his idiosyncratic upbringing to his unexpected career as the director behind such huge film franchises as The Addams Family and Men in Black. Barry Sonnenfeld's philosophy is, "Regret the Past. Fear the Present. Dread the Future." Told in his unmistakable voice, Barry Sonnenfeld, Call Your Mother is a laugh-out-loud memoir about coming of age. Constantly threatened with suicide by his over-protective mother, disillusioned by the father he worshiped, and abused by a demonic relative, Sonnenfeld somehow went on to become one of Hollywood's most successful producers and directors. Written with poignant insight and real-life irony, the book follows Sonnenfeld from childhood as a French horn player through graduate film school at NYU, where he developed his talent for cinematography. His first job after graduating was shooting nine feature length pornos in nine days. From that humble entrée, he went on to form a friendship with the Coen Brothers, launching his career shooting their first three films. Though Sonnenfeld had no ambition to direct, Scott Rudin convinced him to be the director of The Addams Family. It was a successful career move. He went on to direct many more films and television shows. Will Smith once joked that he wanted to take Sonnenfeld to Philadelphia public schools and say, "If this guy could end up as a successful film director on big budget films, anyone can." This book is a fascinating and hilarious roadmap for anyone who thinks they can't succeed in life because of a rough beginning.

Download or read book Mothers Who Kill Their Children written by Cheryl L Meyer and published by NYU Press. This book was released on 2001-08-01 with total page 294 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An inside look into patterns and potential prevention plans for one of the most hotly sensationalized crimes A special kind of horror is reserved for mothers who kill their children. Cases such as those of Susan Smith, who drowned her two young sons by driving her car into a lake, and Melissa Drexler, who disposed of her newborn baby in a restroom at her prom, become media sensations. Unfortunately, in addition to these high-profile cases, hundreds of mothers kill their children in the United States each year. The question most often asked is, why? What would drive a mother to kill her own child? Those who work with such cases, whether in clinical psychology, social services, law enforcement or academia, often lack basic understandings about the types of circumstances and patterns which might lead to these tragic deaths, and the social constructions of motherhood which may affect women's actions. These mothers oftentimes defy the myths and media exploitation of them as evil, insane, or lacking moral principles, and they are not a homogenous group. In obvious ways, intervention strategies should differ for a teenager who denies her pregnancy and then kills her newborn and a mother who kills her two toddlers out of mental illness or to further a relationship. A typology is needed to help us to understand the different cases that commonly occur and the patterns they follow in order to make possible more effective prevention plans. Mothers Who Kill Their Children draws on extensive research to identify clear patterns among the cases of women who kill their children, shedding light on why some women commit these acts. The characteristics the authors establish will be helpful in creating more meaningful policies, more targeted intervention strategies, and more knowledgeable evaluations of these cases when they arise.

Download or read book How to Kill Your Family written by Bella Mackie and published by Abrams. This book was released on 2022-08-02 with total page 355 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Bella Mackie’s How to Kill Your Family is a darkly humorous debut novel that follows a cunning antihero as she gets her revenge. When I think about what I actually did, I feel somewhat sad that nobody will ever know about the complex operation that I undertook. Getting away with it is highly preferable, of course, but perhaps when I’m long gone, someone will open an old safe and find this confession. The public would reel. After all, almost nobody else in the world can possibly understand how someone, by the tender age of twenty-eight, can have calmly killed six members of her family. And then happily got on with the rest of her life, never to regret a thing. When Grace Bernard discovers her absentee millionaire father has rejected her dying mother’s pleas for help, she vows revenge and coldly sets out to get her retribution—by killing them all, one by one. Compulsively readable, Bella Mackie’s debut novel is driven by a captivating first-person narrator who talks of self-care and social media while calmly walking the reader through her increasingly baroque acts of murder. But then, Grace is imprisoned for a murder she didn’t commit. Outrageously funny, compulsive, and subversive, How to Kill Your Family is a wickedly dark romp about class, family, love . . . and murder. “Funny, sharp, dark, and twisted.” —Jojo Moyes

Download or read book Toxic Parents written by Susan Forward and published by Bantam. This book was released on 2009-12-16 with total page 322 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: BONUS: This edition contains an excerpt from Dr. Susan Forward's Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them. When you were a child... Did your parents tell you were bad or worthless? Did your parents use physical pain to discipline you? Did you have to take care of your parents because of their problems? Were you frightened of your parents? Did your parents do anything to you that had to be kept secret? Now that you are an adult... Do your parents still treat you as if you were a child? Do you have intense emotional or physical reactions after spending time with your parents? Do your parents control you with threats or guilt? Do they manipulate you with money? Do you feel that no matter what you do, it's never good enough for your parents? In this remarkable self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward drawn on case histories and the real-life voices of adult children of toxic parents to help you free yourself from the frustrating patterns of your relationship with your parents -- and discover an exciting new world of self-confidence, inner strength, and emotional independence.

Download or read book Verity written by Colleen Hoover and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2021-10-05 with total page 295 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Whose truth is the lie? Stay up all night reading the sensational psychological thriller that has readers obsessed, from the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Too Late and It Ends With Us. #1 New York Times Bestseller · USA Today Bestseller · Globe and Mail Bestseller · Publishers Weekly Bestseller Lowen Ashleigh is a struggling writer on the brink of financial ruin when she accepts the job offer of a lifetime. Jeremy Crawford, husband of bestselling author Verity Crawford, has hired Lowen to complete the remaining books in a successful series his injured wife is unable to finish. Lowen arrives at the Crawford home, ready to sort through years of Verity’s notes and outlines, hoping to find enough material to get her started. What Lowen doesn’t expect to uncover in the chaotic office is an unfinished autobiography Verity never intended for anyone to read. Page after page of bone-chilling admissions, including Verity's recollection of the night her family was forever altered. Lowen decides to keep the manuscript hidden from Jeremy, knowing its contents could devastate the already grieving father. But as Lowen’s feelings for Jeremy begin to intensify, she recognizes all the ways she could benefit if he were to read his wife’s words. After all, no matter how devoted Jeremy is to his injured wife, a truth this horrifying would make it impossible for him to continue loving her.

Download or read book The Long Goodbye written by Meghan O'Rourke and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2011-04-14 with total page 205 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Anguished, beautifully written... The Long Goodbye is an elegiac depiction of drama as old as life." -- The New York Times Book Review From one of America's foremost young literary voices, a transcendent portrait of the unbearable anguish of grief and the enduring power of familial love. What does it mean to mourn today, in a culture that has largely set aside rituals that acknowledge grief? After her mother died of cancer at the age of fifty-five, Meghan O'Rourke found that nothing had prepared her for the intensity of her sorrow. In the first anguished days, she began to create a record of her interior life as a mourner, trying to capture the paradox of grief-its monumental agony and microscopic intimacies-an endeavor that ultimately bloomed into a profound look at how caring for her mother during her illness changed and strengthened their bond. O'Rourke's story is one of a life gone off the rails, of how watching her mother's illness-and separating from her husband-left her fundamentally altered. But it is also one of resilience, as she observes her family persevere even in the face of immeasurable loss. With lyricism and unswerving candor, The Long Goodbye conveys the fleeting moments of joy that make up a life, and the way memory can lead us out of the jagged darkness of loss. Effortlessly blending research and reflection, the personal and the universal, it is not only an exceptional memoir, but a necessary one.

Download or read book When You and Your Mother Can t Be Friends written by Victoria Secunda and published by Delta. This book was released on 2009-11-04 with total page 428 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “A book of great value for every daughter and every mother; useful for sons, too.”—Benjamin Spock, M.D. From the Introduction: The goal of this book is to help readers achieve that separation so that they can either find a way to be friends with their mothers, or at least recognize and accept that their mothers did the best they could—even if it wasn't “good enough”—and to stop blaming them. Among the issues to be covered: • To understand how a daughter's attachment to her mother—more so than her relationship with her father—colors all her other relationships, and to analyze why it is more difficult for daughters than sons to separate from their mothers, as well as why daughters are more subject than sons to a mother's manipulation • To recognize the difference between a healthy and a destructive mother-daughter connection, and to define clearly the “bad mommy,” in order to help readers who have trouble acknowledging their childhood losses to begin to comprehend them • To conjugate what I call the “Bad Mommy Taboo”—why our culture is more eager to protect the sanctity of maternity than it is to protect emotionally abused daughters • To describe the evolution of the "unpleasable" mother—in all likelihood, she was bereft of maternal love as a child—and to recognize the huge, and often poignant, stake she has in keeping her grown daughter dependent and off-balance • To illustrate the consequent controlling behavior—in some cases, cloaked in fragility or good intentions—of such mothers, which falls into general patterns, including: the Doormat, the Critic, the Smotherer, the Avenger, the Deserter • To understand that the daughter has a similar stake in either being a slave to or hating her mother—the two sides of her depen dency and immaturity • To illustrate the responsive behavior—and survival mechanisms —of daughters, which is determined in part by such variables as birth rank, family history, and temperament, and which also falls into patterns, including: the Angel, the Superachiever, the Cipher, the Troublemaker, the Defector • To show how to redefine the mother-daughter relationship, so that each can learn to see and accept the other as she is today, appreciating each other's good qualities and not being snared by the bad • Finally, to demonstrate that a redefined relationship with one's mother—adult to adult—frees you from the past, whether that re definition ultimately results in real friendship, affectionate truce, or divorce.

Download or read book Sometimes I Lie written by Alice Feeney and published by Flatiron Books. This book was released on 2018-03-13 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: My name is Amber Reynolds. There are three things you should know about me: 1. I’m in a coma. 2. My husband doesn’t love me anymore. 3. Sometimes I lie. Amber wakes up in a hospital. She can’t move. She can’t speak. She can’t open her eyes. She can hear everyone around her, but they have no idea. Amber doesn’t remember what happened, but she has a suspicion her husband had something to do with it. Alternating between her paralyzed present, the week before her accident, and a series of childhood diaries from twenty years ago, this brilliant psychological thriller asks: Is something really a lie if you believe it's the truth?

Download or read book I m Glad My Mom Died written by Jennette McCurdy and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-08-09 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A memoir by American former actress and singer Jennette McCurdy about her career as a child actress and her difficult relationship with her abusive mother who died in 2013