Download or read book The Ultimate Hockey Joke Book Laugh Your Face Off written by Ian Robinson and published by . This book was released on 2023-09 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book 101 Ice Hockey Jokes written by Kj Smith and published by Independently Published. This book was released on 2024-03-29 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Glide into a world of humor on the ice with 101 Ice Hockey Jokes, the ultimate collection of hilarious jokes, puns, and one-liners dedicated to the thrilling world of ice hockey. Perfect for players, fans, and anyone with a love for the game, this book scores big with its witty observations and playful take on the sport's quirks, traditions, and the icy adventures that make it so beloved. From the face-off circle to the penalty box, 101 Ice Hockey Jokes delivers a power play of laughter, capturing the spirit and passion of hockey culture. Whether you're a seasoned veteran of the sport, a weekend warrior, or simply someone who enjoys a good chuckle alongside the action of the game, these jokes are a great way to lighten the mood and share the joy of hockey with friends and family. 101 Ice Hockey Jokes isn't just a joke book; it's an ode to the camaraderie and fun that ice hockey brings into our lives. It makes an excellent gift for teammates, a thoughtful surprise for coaches, or a delightful treat for anyone who cherishes the game. So lace up your skates, grab your stick, and get ready to enjoy a breakaway of belly laughs with this entertaining collection. Whether you're a player, a fan, or simply someone who loves a good joke, "Laugh-A-Lot Joke Books: Sports Edition" promises endless amusement and will leave you in stitches with its witty and clever humor.
Download or read book 101 Hockey Jokes written by Kara Woodburn and published by . This book was released on 2012-08 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Here are 101 reasons to laugh about hockey! What is another word for a hockey fan?A Canadian! When do hockey players dress in formal attire?When it's a tie game! Why did the offensive coach get frustrated when he checked his email?He had too many forwards! We know Canadians love to laugh, and we definitely love our hockey. Combining the two into 101 Hockey Jokes? Now that's a recipe for some slapstick humour!
Download or read book A Very Punchable Face written by Colin Jost and published by Crown. This book was released on 2020-07-14 with total page 346 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • In these hilarious essays, the Saturday Night Live head writer and Weekend Update co-anchor learns how to take a beating. “I always wanted to punch his face before I read this book. Now I just want to kick him in the balls.”—Larry David NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY Cosmopolitan • Vulture • Parade If there’s one trait that makes someone well suited to comedy, it’s being able to take a punch—metaphorically and, occasionally, physically. From growing up in a family of firefighters on Staten Island to commuting three hours a day to high school and “seeing the sights” (like watching a Russian woman throw a stroller off the back of a ferry), to attending Harvard while Facebook was created, Jost shares how he has navigated the world like a slightly smarter Forrest Gump. You’ll also discover things about Jost that will surprise and confuse you, like how Jimmy Buffett saved his life, how Czech teenagers attacked him with potato salad, how an insect laid eggs inside his legs, and how he competed in a twenty-five-man match at WrestleMania (and almost won). You'll go behind the scenes at SNL and Weekend Update (where he's written some of the most memorable sketches and jokes of the past fifteen years). And you’ll experience the life of a touring stand-up comedian—from performing in rural college cafeterias at noon to opening for Dave Chappelle at Radio City Music Hall. For every accomplishment (hosting the Emmys), there is a setback (hosting the Emmys). And for every absurd moment (watching paramedics give CPR to a raccoon), there is an honest, emotional one (recounting his mother’s experience on the scene of the Twin Towers’ collapse on 9/11). Told with a healthy dose of self-deprecation, A Very Punchable Face reveals the brilliant mind behind some of the dumbest sketches on television, and lays bare the heart and humor of a hardworking guy—with a face you can’t help but want to punch.
Download or read book Line Mates Study Dates written by Saxon James and published by . This book was released on 2021-06-21 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: ASHER Hockey, studying, and school runs. That's my life now. After a tragic accident that took our parents' lives, it's up to me and my big brother to take care of our five younger siblings. In between burning their meals and keeping them from killing each other, I'm supposed to get a college degree. It's hard when I don't have time to breathe let alone study, and if I don't get my grades up, I'm in danger of losing the one thing that makes me happy: my spot on the hockey team. Which is why when the new equipment manager offers to tutor me, I really can't afford to say no. Even though I should. He's Coach's son and way too tempting. KOLE As this year's equipment manager for Dad's hockey team, I'm expected to deal with sweaty jock straps and herding hockey players to their rooms at away games. The job is easy, but babysitting Asher Dalton is not supposed to be a part of it. So why, when his brother asks me to keep an eye on him, do I agree? Why, when he's struggling in classes, do I offer to help? And why, when we're studying, do I suggest a reward system that lands us squarely in bed? Asher's trouble, I know he is. But there's something about him that makes it impossible to stay away.
Download or read book Scoring Off The Ice written by Stacey Lynn and published by Stacey Lynn. This book was released on 2020-04-07 with total page 265 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sometimes scoring off the ice leads to the greatest rewards. I’ve had only one goal in life since I first strapped on a pair of skates—make America’s pro hockey league. I left Denmark. I made it to the top. Now, I’m determined to be the best. No distractions. I eat, sleep, and breathe hockey. Until my birthday when my teammates convince me to live a little. But living a little takes on a whole new meaning when less than a year later I’m confronted with a crying baby on my doorstep, drooling on a note that declares he’s mine. Suddenly, I'm a single dad in way over my head. There is no playbook for situations like this. Luckily, I have Paisley. My gorgeous neighbor, my long-time crush, and now—my savior. She’s there any time I need her. Helping. Guiding. Gazing at me with those green eyes that make me feel capable of this after all. With her at my side, I’m quickly learning there’s more to life than winning a hockey game.
Download or read book Hockey Jokes for Kids written by James Allan Einstein and published by . This book was released on 2014-04 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hey, kids! These hockey jokes will tickle your funny bone and keep you laughing all through hockey season and beyond: Q: What does a hockey player and a magician have in common? A: Both do hat tricks!
Download or read book Between the Lines written by Jodi Picoult and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-06-25 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Told in their separate voices, sixteen-year-old Prince Oliver, who wants to break free of his fairy-tale existence, and fifteen-year-old Delilah, a loner obsessed with Prince Oliver and the book in which he exists, work together to seek his freedom.
Download or read book Let s Pretend This Never Happened written by Jenny Lawson and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2013-03-05 with total page 385 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times bestselling (mostly true) memoir from the hilarious author of Furiously Happy. “Gaspingly funny and wonderfully inappropriate.”—O, The Oprah Magazine When Jenny Lawson was little, all she ever wanted was to fit in. That dream was cut short by her fantastically unbalanced father and a morbidly eccentric childhood. It did, however, open up an opportunity for Lawson to find the humor in the strange shame-spiral that is her life, and we are all the better for it. In the irreverent Let’s Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson’s long-suffering husband and sweet daughter help her uncover the surprising discovery that the most terribly human moments—the ones we want to pretend never happened—are the very same moments that make us the people we are today. For every intellectual misfit who thought they were the only ones to think the things that Lawson dares to say out loud, this is a poignant and hysterical look at the dark, disturbing, yet wonderful moments of our lives. Readers Guide Inside
Download or read book Seriously I m Kidding written by Ellen DeGeneres and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2011-10-04 with total page 146 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: ~b~>With the winning, upbeat candor that has made her show on of the most popular and honored daytime shows on the air, beloved talk show host and comedian Ellen DeGeneres shares her views on life, love, and American Idol. "I've experienced a whole lot the last few years and I have a lot to share. So I hope that you'll take a moment to sit back, relax and enjoy the words I've put together for you in this book. I think you'll find I've left no stone unturned, no door unopened, no window unbroken, no rug unvacuumed, no ivories untickled. What I'm saying is, let us begin, shall we?" Seriously... I'm Kidding is a lively, hilarious, and often sweetly poignant look at the life of the much-loved entertainer as she opens up about her personal life, her talk show, and more. PRAISE FOR Seriously... I'm Kidding "DeGeneres's amiably oddball riffs on everything from kale to catwalks to Jesus will make fans smile." -- People "Whatever the topic, DeGeneres's compulsively readable style will appeal to fans old and new." - Publishers Weekly "Fans will not be disappointed...[DeGeneres's] trademark wit and openness shine through and through." -- Kirkus/DIVspan
Download or read book Puck Me Secretly written by Odette Stone and published by . This book was released on 2018-10-18 with total page 402 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I've never been in love.I've never had an orgasm, but I've faked plenty.I want to experience love. Real, passionate love.I don't want to die.It's funny what blurts out of your mouth when the plane you're on is going down, and I didn't hold back with my seat mate when my plane decided to crash.My hysterical confessions didn't faze the muscular stranger that sat beside me. In fact, he promised if we survived, he'd give me my first orgasm. We survived.I came.And then he left without telling me who he was.On the first day of my job, I stood in front of the Vancouver Wolves hockey team and called out a number. #33.Imagine my shock when he skated forward.Max is an incredible hockey player, whose wild, out-of-control antics have almost derailed his career. So many secrets shroud his past and continue to threaten his future. Now he's my secret. And that secret could ruin everything. Puck Me SECRETLY. Some secrets are too big to keep.This book is 86,000 words and is a full-length romance intended for adult audiences only.
Download or read book Take Your Eye Off the Puck written by Greg Wyshynski and published by Triumph Books. This book was released on 2015-11-01 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A guide for sports fans on how to watch and appreciate the game of hockey More and more fans are watching the NHL each week, but many of them don't know exactly what they should be watching. How does an offense create shooting lanes for its best sniper? When a center breaks through and splits between two defensemen, which defender is to blame? Why does a goalie look like a Hall of Famer one week and a candidate for the minor leagues the next? This guide for sports fans on how to watch and appreciate the game of hockey takes you inside a coach's mind as he builds a roster or constructs a game plan, to the chaos of the goalie's crease, and deep into the perpetual chess match between offense and defense. Discussing topics such as what to look for when a team goes on the power play and why playing center might be the most grueling job in sports, Take Your Eye Off the Puck shows fans how to get the most out of watching their favorite sport.
Download or read book The Big Book of Silly Jokes for Kids written by Carole Roman and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2019-08-27 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze! Discover more than 800 silly jokes for kids in this hilarious kids joke book Reading jokes can tickle your funny bone AND help boost reading skills. The Big Book of Silly Jokes for Kids is chock-full of knock-knock jokes, riddles, tongue twisters, and puns you can share with your friends and family for hours and hours of laughing! Funny facts and illustrations—Find some very silly illustrations that match the jokes, and fun trivia about the joke topics—did you know that elephants can't jump? Beginner joke-writing tips—This joke book for kids explains how setups and punchlines works and includes tips and exercises to help you write your own jokes. Take jokes anywhere—Bring this book on road trips, plane trips, and more so you can have fun everywhere you go. Give the gift of laughter—Whether it's a birthday gift, a stocking stuffer, an Easter basket stuffer, or a present for any occasion, this book makes an educational and hilarious gift for every kid who loves to laugh! The perfect joke book for kids of all ages, The Big Book of Silly Jokes for Kids promises to keep the young readers entertained and amused.
Download or read book Tales of a First Round Nothing written by Terry Ryan and published by ECW Press. This book was released on 2014-05-01 with total page 199 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Terry Ryan was poised to take the hockey world by storm when he was selected eighth overall by the Montreal Canadiens in the 1995 NHL draft, their highest draft pick in a decade. Expected to go on to become a hockey star, Ryan played a total of eight NHL games for the Canadiens, scoring no goals and no assists: not exactly the career he, or anyone else, was expecting. Though Terry's NHL career wasn't long, he experienced a lot and has no shortage of hilarious and fascinating revelations about life in pro hockey on and off the ice. In Tales of a First-Round Nothing, he recounts fighting with Tie Domi, partying with rock stars, and everything in between. Ryan tells it like it is, detailing his rocky relationship with Michel Therrien, head coach of the Canadiens, and explaining what life is like for a man who was unprepared to have his career over so soon.
Download or read book How to Make White People Laugh written by Negin Farsad and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2016-05-24 with total page 305 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the acclaimed writer, director, and star of the hit documentary The Muslims are Coming! comes a memoir in essays about growing up Iranian-American in a post-9/11 world and the power of comedy to combat racism. Negin Farsad is an Iranian-American-Muslim female stand-up comedian who believes she can change the world through jokes. And yes, sometimes that includes fart jokes. In this candid and uproarious book, Farsad shares her personal experiences growing up as the "other" in an American culture that has no time for nuance. In fact, she longed to be black and/or Mexican at various points of her youth, you know, like normal kids. Right? RIGHT? Writing bluntly and hilariously about the elements of race we are often too politically correct to discuss, Farsad takes a long hard look at the iconography that still shapes our concepts of "black," "white," and "Muslim" today-and what it means when white culture defines the culture. Farsad asks the important questions like, What does it mean to have a hyphenated identity? How can we actually combat racism, stereotyping, and exclusion? Do Iranians get bunions at a higher rate than other ethnic groups? (She's asking for a friend.) How to Make White People Laugh tackles these questions with wit, humor, and incisive intellect. And along the way, you might just learn a thing or two about tetherball, Duck Dynasty, and wine slushies.
Download or read book My Squirrel Days written by Ellie Kemper and published by Scribner. This book was released on 2019-07-02 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Comedian and star of The Office and Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Ellie Kemper delivers a hilarious, refreshing, and inspiring collection of essays “teeming with energy and full of laugh-out-loud moments” (Associated Press). “A pleasure. Ellie Kemper is the kind of stable, intelligent, funny, healthy woman that usually only exists in yogurt commercials. But she’s real and she’s all ours!” —Tina Fey “Ellie is a hilarious and talented writer, although we’ll never know how much of this book the squirrel wrote.”—Mindy Kaling Meet Ellie, the best-intentioned redhead next door. You’ll laugh right alongside her as she shares tales of her childhood in St. Louis, whether directing and also starring in her family holiday pageant, washing her dad’s car with a Brillo pad, failing to become friends with a plump squirrel in her backyard, eating her feelings while watching PG-13 movies, or becoming a “sports monster” who ends up warming the bench of her Division 1 field hockey team in college. You’ll learn how she found her comedic calling in the world of improv, became a wife, mother and New Yorker, and landed the role of a bridesmaid (while simultaneously being a bridesmaid) in Bridesmaids. You’ll get to know and love the comic, upbeat, perpetually polite actress playing Erin Hannon on The Office, and the exuberant, pink-pants-wearing star of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. If you’ve ever been curious about what happens behind the scenes of your favorite shows, what it really takes to be a soul cycle “warrior,” how to recover if you accidentally fall on Doris Kearns Goodwin or tell Tina Fey on meeting her for the first time that she has “great hair—really strong and thick,” this is your chance to find out. But it’s also a laugh-out-loud primer on how to keep a positive outlook in a world gone mad and how not to give up on your dreams. Ellie “dives fully into each role—as actor, comedian, writer, and also wife and new mom—with an electric dedication, by which one learns to reframe the picture, and if not exactly become a glass-half-full sort of person, at least become able to appreciate them” (Vogue.com).
Download or read book Hilarious Jokes For 11 Year Old Kids written by Hayden Fox and published by . This book was released on 2020-07-15 with total page 80 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Knock, Knock. Who's There? The Most Hilarious Jokes For Your 11 Year Old!
