Download or read book Bad Dad Jokes written by Willow Creek Press and published by . This book was released on 2018 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The dad joke is a delicate thing. Part knowing humor, part lack of humor, it's only requirement is that it elicits not a laugh from its audience but the annoyed response: "Daaaaaaaaad." Bad Dad Jokes is the biggest, baddest collection of "so bad they're actually good" jokes that are guaranteed to deliver a daily dose of groans and giggles. Bad Dad Jokes is a one of a kind collection of extraordinary humor in one book. By giving this collection as a gift you will bring humor and lasting memories to events for years to come.

Download or read book A Thousand Naked Strangers written by Kevin Hazzard and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-01-05 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A former paramedic’s "thrilling, captivating" (Booklist), and mordantly funny account of a decade spent as a first responder in Atlanta saving lives and connecting with the drama and occasional beauty that lies inside catastrophe. In the aftermath of 9/11 Kevin Hazzard felt that something was missing from his life—his days were too safe, too routine. A failed salesman turned local reporter, he wanted to test himself, see how he might respond to pressure and danger. He signed up for emergency medical training and became, at age twenty-six, a newly minted EMT running calls in the worst sections of Atlanta. His life entered a different realm—one of blood, violence, and amazing grace. Thoroughly intimidated at first and frequently terrified, he experienced on a nightly basis the adrenaline rush of walking into chaos. But in his downtime, Kevin reflected on how people’s facades drop away when catastrophe strikes. As his hours on the job piled up, he realized he was beginning to see into the truth of things. There is no pretense five beats into a chest compression, or in an alley next to a crack den, or on a dimly lit highway where cars have collided. Eventually, what had at first seemed impossible happened: Kevin acquired mastery. And in the process he was able to discern the professional differences between his freewheeling peers, what marked each—as he termed them—as “a tourist,” “true believer,” or “killer.” Combining indelible scenes that remind us of life’s fragile beauty with laugh-out-loud moments that keep us smiling through the worst, A Thousand Naked Strangers is an absorbing read about one man’s journey of self-discovery—a trip that also teaches us about ourselves.

Download or read book World s Okayest Taxi Driver written by Ss Custom Designs and published by Independently Published. This book was released on 2019-04-08 with total page 122 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Let your creativity flow with this funny yet simple notebook, which can be used for anything from a journal to a diary, or even as a tracker for food and exercise. It features a unique design and is the perfect size to travel with, so there is no need to be without it when inspiration strikes. Details include: . 6x9 inches 120 pages Blank Lined Journal Matte-finish paperback cover White paper This notebook is perfect for any men, women, girls, or boys of all ages that love writing or journaling and would make a great idea for Christmas, birthday, graduation, or back to school gifts. Perfect notebook for taking notes in school, keeping track of your favorite recipes, or writing down your thoughts at the end of the day. If you are looking for a holiday gift to show your appreciation for someone you care about and want to let them know you are grateful to have them in your life, this journal notebook is a perfect choice.

Download or read book The Queen of Water written by Laura Resau and published by Ember. This book was released on 2012-03-13 with total page 370 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For fans of I Am Malala comes this poignant novel based on the true story of one girl's unforgettable journey to self-discovery. *An ALA Amelia Bloomer Selection* *An ALA-YALSA Best Fiction for Young Adults Book* Born in an Andean village in Ecuador, Virginia lives with her family in a small, earthen-walled dwelling. In her Indigenous community, it is not uncommon to work in the fields all day, even as a child, or to be called a longa tonta—stupid Indian—by members of the privileged class of mestizos, or Spanish descendants. When seven-year-old Virginia is taken from her home to be a servant to a mestizo couple, she has no idea what the future holds. In this poignant novel based on her own story, the inspiring María Virginia Farinango has collaborated with acclaimed author Laura Resau to recount one girl's unforgettable journey to find her place in the world. It will make you laugh and cry, and ultimately, it will fill you with hope.

Download or read book Emergency Medical Specialist Trainee written by National Learning Corporation and published by Passbooks. This book was released on 2013 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Emergency Medical Specialist Trainee Passbook(R) prepares you for your test by allowing you to take practice exams in the subjects you need to study. It provides hundreds of questions and answers in the areas that will likely be covered on your upcoming exam, including but not limited to: reasoning maps and spatial orientation; written comprehension and expression; and more.

Download or read book The Magic of Motherhood written by Ashlee Gadd and published by Zondervan. This book was released on 2017-04-04 with total page 241 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Are you an imperfect, trying-her-best mom? If you're over reading parenting advice, The Magic of Motherhood should be your next read. Motherhood can often feel overwhelming and isolating. Your feelings swing between joy and uncertainty, intense love and anxiety, laughter and tears. Ashlee Gadd and the writers behind the popular blog Coffee + Crumbs have written a beautiful reminder of your identity, both as a woman and a mother. The Magic of Motherhood is a curated collection of honest stories weaving together the love, joy, and magnificent heartache of motherhood. Instead of offering advice, the writers offer something even better: their hearts. You'll read essays about identity, adoption, body image, miscarriage, friendship, faith, and more. After reading, mothers will: Find joy in both beauty and mess Discover a renewed strength and sisterhood Be reassured that they are not alone Want to gift this book on Mother's Day, birthdays, baby showers, National Best Friend Day, and other holidays New and seasoned moms will enjoy The Magic of Motherhood. This book is a love letter to mothers everywhere. Essays from Ashlee Gadd of Coffee + Crumbs and its contributors will provide solidarity for all moms.

Download or read book Dr J written by Julius Erving and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2013-11-05 with total page 414 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “A terrific memoir by a man worthy of one.” — Sports Illustrated An honest, unflinching self-portrait of the basketball legend whose classy public image as a superstar and a gentleman masked his personal failings and painful losses, which he describes here—from his own point of view—for the very first time. For most of his life, Julius Erving has been two men in one. There is Julius, the bright, inquisitive son of a Long Island domestic worker who has always wanted to be respected for more than just his athletic ability, and there is Dr. J, the cool, acrobatic showman whose flamboyant dunks sent him to the Hall of Fame and turned the act of jamming a basketball through a hoop into an art form. In many ways, Erving’s life has been about the push and pull of Julius and The Doctor. It is Dr. J who has stories to tell of the wild days and nights of the ABA in the 1970s, and of being the seminal figure who transformed basketball from an earthbound and rigid game into the creative, free-flowing aerial display it is today. He has a long list of signature plays - he’s famous for winning the first dunk contest in 1976 with a jam on which he lifted off from the foul line, and he made a miraculous layup against the Lakers on which he soared behind the backboard before reaching back in to flip the ball in on the other side, with one hand. He inspired a generation of dunkers, including Michael Jordan, to express their improvisational talents. But Julius wasn’t always as graceful and in control as Dr. J. Erving had a pristine image throughout his career and early retirement, but he was far from a perfect man. Here he gives detailed accounts of some of the personal problems he faced -- or created -- behind the scenes, including the adulterous affair with sports writer Samantha Stephenson, which led to the birth of his daughter, professional tennis player Alexandra Stephenson. Though his marriage survived that infidelity, the death of Erving’s 20-year-old son Cory in 2000 in a tragic accident proved too much for the union to bear. Erving paints a raw, heartbreaking picture of the dissolution of his marriage, as his wife Turquoise began to blame him for his refusal to be paralyzed by grief for as long as she was. Their intense arguments came to a head when Erving stepped out of the shower one day to find his wife holding a lamp in one hand and a vase in the other, ready for a physical confrontation. “I knew somebody was going to get hurt, and it wasn’t going to be me,” he says. He packed a suitcase and he and Turquoise never lived under the same roof again. Erving’s story is a tale of the nearly perfect player and the imperfect man, and how he has come to terms with both of them. It will appeal to readers on a sports level and on a human one.

Download or read book The Australian Official Journal of Trademarks written by and published by . This book was released on 1906 with total page 536 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Calm the H ck Down written by Melanie Dale and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2020-12-08 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From author and speaker Melanie Dale comes a laugh-out-loud hilarious parenting book that teaches you how to dial back the stress of raising children with the simple premise that we all just need to lighten up a little bit. Most of us thought we’d be amazing parents—and then we had kids. Now we spend what little free time we have comparing ourselves to other parents, comparing our kids to other kids, and panicking that everyone else is nailing it except us. Between constant social media postings to conflicting advice found in parenting books, we often have no choice but to freak out. But there is another way. We all just need to calm the h*ck down. Melanie Dale—a special needs parent, adoptive parent, in vitro parent, and reluctant cheer mom—believes we are all putting too much pressure on ourselves and our kids to be perfect. Instead, she argues, we need to take a step back so we can actually enjoy this journey called parenting. Calm the H*ck Down is filled with stories from Melanie’s own life, as well as real-life research for learning how to lighten up about every aspect of parenting—from poopy diapers and germs to family vacations and adolescent angst. She also discusses the pressure to knock it all out of the Pinterest park, the challenge of instilling some kind of faith into your kids, and worrying about their future while still trying to live in the present. Infused with quirky humor, profound insight, and accessible advice, Calm the H*ck Down gives you the permission to finally relax and enjoy this ridiculous thing we do called parenting.

Download or read book It s Not Fair written by Melanie Dale and published by HarperChristian + ORM. This book was released on 2016-08-16 with total page 254 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hey, you. Are you debating whether to destroy something with your bare hands or curl up on the couch for a decade or two? This book will solve all of your problems. (Sheesh, that's aiming a bit high.) This book is a cup of hot coffee, a ginormous bar of chocolate, or the magical fairy that comes over and does your dishes while you lie in the fetal position clutching a fluffy pillow. Sometimes when life falls apart the only acceptable response is hysterical laughter. When things get so far gone, so spectacularly a world away from any plans you made or dreams you dreamed, you feel it bubbling up inside of you and you scream, "It's not fair!" And it isn't. Fair is an illusion, and life is weird. This book will help you laugh at life's absurd backhands. This book is an empathetic groan of our collective unfairnesses. You might want to throw it across the room, and you might want to hug it like your new best friend. This book is about us sitting down together in our shared mess, taking a deep breath, gripping hands, looking the hard stuff in its beady little eyeballs, and bahahahaaing at it. Life's not fair, but we can learn to love this life we didn't choose.

Download or read book Women are Scary written by Melanie Dale and published by Zondervan. This book was released on 2015-03-24 with total page 219 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Let's see . . . this is the part where I convince you that you need this book. This book will massage your feet. This book will bring you a fuzzy blanket at the end of a long day of parenting your tiny little insanazoids. I promise to make you snort laugh at least once. After reading this book, you'll rock jazz hands, be able to sing on-key, and never, ever have to fold laundry again. Okay, they told me I'm actually supposed to tell you a little about the book. Um, right. Look. Here's the thing. Too many of us women are frazzled and lonely, isolated in our minivans while schlepping bags, strollers, and munchkins to and fro across town. It doesn't have to be this way. In this guide to "momlationships," I use a dating analogy to take us "around the bases" to our home-run friendships, the ones that last a lifetime, not just a soccer season. This is our journey to each other, to finding our people and being other people's people, learning how to bless each other and not destroy each other. It's sometimes scary. And always awkward. Let's have some fun.

Download or read book Jazz Workshop for Bass and Drums written by Dave Weigert and published by Alfred Music. This book was released on 2015-10 with total page 136 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This comprehensive book & CD set can help drummers and bassists gain valuable playing experience in jazz, funk, and Latin jazz styles. The CD features 16 play-along tracks with parts and playing suggestions for each tune. Jazz classics by John Coltrane, Miles Davis, Herbie Hancock, and Sonny Rollins are included along with funk tunes by Pee Wee Ellis, Russell Ferrante, and others. The book explains in detail how to play in bands and how to practice effectively. Reading topics include jazz history, chart reading, feel, song form, and musician's vocabulary. The rhythm section includes Berklee faculty bassists Bruce Gertz, Oscar Stagnaro, Bruno Raberg, and Anthony Vitti. Soloists are Billy Pierce, Hal Crook, Ken Cervenka, and Walter Beasley. Educators may also benefit by referring students to the carefully notated rhythmic feels.

Download or read book The Cost of Living written by Arundhati Roy and published by Vintage Canada. This book was released on 2010-12-10 with total page 111 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the bestselling author of The God of Small Things comes a scathing and passionate indictment of big government's disregard for the individual. In her Booker Prize-winning novel, The God of Small Things, Arundhati Roy turned a compassionate but unrelenting eye on one family in India. Now she lavishes the same acrobatic language and fierce humanity on the future of her beloved country. In this spirited polemic, Roy dares to take on two of the great illusions of India's progress: the massive dam projects that were supposed to haul this sprawling subcontinent into the modern age--but which instead have displaced untold millions--and the detonation of India's first nuclear bomb, with all its attendant Faustian bargains. Merging her inimitable voice with a great moral outrage and imaginative sweep, Roy peels away the mask of democracy and prosperity to show the true costs hidden beneath. For those who have been mesmerized by her vision of India, here is a sketch, traced in fire, of its topsy-turvy society, where the lives of the many are sacrificed for the comforts of the few. From the Trade Paperback edition.

Download or read book Histoires en action written by Wendy Maxwell and published by [Bowen Island, B.C.] : AIM Learning language. This book was released on 2004 with total page 422 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Beat the Crowd written by Kenneth L. Fisher and published by John Wiley & Sons. This book was released on 2015-03-30 with total page 325 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Train your brain to be a real contrarian and outsmart the crowd Beat the Crowd is the real contrarian’s guide to investing, with comprehensive explanations of how a true contrarian investor thinks and acts – and why it works more often than not. Bestselling author Ken Fisher breaks down the myths and cuts through the noise to present a clear, unvarnished view of timeless market realities, and the ways in which a contrarian approach to investing will outsmart the herd. In true Ken Fisher style, the book explains why the crowd often goes astray—and how you can stay on track. Contrarians understand how headlines really affect the market and which noise and fads they should tune out. Beat the Crowd is a primer to the contrarian strategy, teaching readers simple tricks to think differently and get it right more often than not. Discover the limits of forecasting and how far ahead you should look Learn why political controversy matter less the louder it gets Resurrect long-forgotten, timeless tricks and truths in markets Find out how the contrarian approach makes you right more often than wrong A successful investment strategy requires information, preparation, a little bit of brainpower, and a larger bit of luck. Pursuit of the mythical perfect strategy frequently lands folks in a cacophony of talking heads and twenty-four hour noise, but Beat the Crowd cuts through the mental clutter and collects the pristine pieces of actual value into a tactical approach based on going against the grain.

Download or read book Petroleum Laboratory Specialist written by United States. Department of the Army and published by . This book was released on 1979 with total page 244 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Tinder Nightmares written by Unspirational and published by Abrams. This book was released on 2017-01-21 with total page 164 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Will have you in hysterics over truly epic Tinder fails . . . it captures real life conversations potential couples have exchanged over the app.” —Spy Tinder Nightmares is a hilarious look at some of the most epic fails of the often racy, always ridiculous, “romantic” exchanges on Tinder. The Instagram account of the same name has skyrocketed to popularity for its captivating—and sometimes titillating—ability to capture the real-life conversations between people who are looking to connect with that special someone. Tinder Nightmares is organized by theme, with chapters such as Bad English, Broetry, Strange Requests, Sneak Attacks, and more. This book explores everything from pickup lines to breakups, and all the moments that come in between. It’s the perfect gift for anyone who has ever suffered through online dating. Praise for the Tinder Nightmares Instagram account “Taking submissions from womankind worldwide, the account posts the funniest and most tragic lines, which serve to make us simultaneously jubilant with comfort that others out there are enduring the same terror, and weepy at our complete loss of faith in humanity.” —Cosmopolitan “So, for anyone who has ever had a nightmarish experience on Tinder, Tinder Nightmares is here to remind you that you’re not alone. Because when life gives you innocuously bizarre Tinder messages, make jokes.” —HuffPost