Download or read book When Pleasing You Is Killing Me written by Les Carter and published by Bookbaby. This book was released on 2018-06-23 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: While people pleasers can be some of the nicest people you'll meet, they have an uncanny knack for finding themselves in relationships with controllers. Knowing how pleasers are motivated by duty and obligation, the controllers will persuade, cajole, argue, and convince, knowing they can erode the resolve of the pleaser rather quickly. This, of course, leaves the pleaser with residual feelings of hurt, anxiety, and resentment. Because pleasers are not as skilled in the art of coercion as the controller, they can collapse in feelings of futility. In the book, When Pleasing You Is Killing Me, Dr. Les Carter explains how the pleaser can become freed from futility by choosing to stay out of the controller's power games altogether. Drawing upon decades of counseling with a wide array of frustrated nice people, Dr. Carter gives sound direction to those seeking to reclaim their true selves. Relationship boundaries are explained, assertiveness is taught, and insights are offered as the reader is guided into a paradigm shift regarding the ways to respond to a controller.
Download or read book Enough About You Let s Talk About Me written by Les Carter and published by John Wiley & Sons. This book was released on 2008-01-18 with total page 215 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Those who are in the unenviable position of living or working with a narcissist have learned by sad trial and error that they are the only one in the relationship who can change the dynamic. Certainly narcissists don’t think they need to change. Enough About You, Let’s Talk About Me is a hands-on resource for helping colleagues, families, and spouses deal with people who exhibit narcissistic tendencies by learning how to change their own attitudes and responses.
Download or read book Grace and Divorce written by Les Carter and published by John Wiley & Sons. This book was released on 2009-01-09 with total page 230 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Grace and Divorce, written by noted author and psychotherapist, Dr. Les Carter, provides sound theological thinking on divorce and wise and compassionate suggestions for reframing and deepening our understanding of this difficult and controversial topic. Using stories from his practice as a therapist, Dr. Carter offers healing to both those who divorce and those who know and love them. He explains that Jesus never intended us to be so fixed about right and wrong and so judgmental that we lose the ability to love those who do not meet His perfect standards. With kindness and love, he shows that the wonderful gift of God’s grace is the best way to respond to people facing this trying life challenge.
Download or read book Killing Calvinism written by Greg Dutcher and published by Cruciform Press. This book was released on 2012-06 with total page 74 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Are we actually living the message of grace? "When a corrective like this comes from within a movement, it is a sign of health" -John Piper Something wonderful is happening in Western Evangelicalism. A resurgence of Calvinism is changing lives, transforming churches, and spreading the gospel. The books are great, the sermons are life-changing, the music is inspirational, and the conferences are astonishing. Will this continue or will we, who are part of it all, end up destroying it? That depends on how we live the message. As "insiders" of the Calvinist resurgence, there are at least eight ways we can mess everything up. Learn what they are and how to avoid killing off a perfectly good theology.
Download or read book The Self Evolved Leader written by Dave McKeown and published by Greenleaf Book Group. This book was released on 2020-01-28 with total page 241 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A practical guide to help executives and managers at all levels adopt a new way of leading in our fast-moving world. In this easy-to-read yet impactful book, leadership expert Dave McKeown dispels many of the leadership mindsets and approaches that are no longer effective in our organizations. In their place, he provides a compelling case for a new kind of leadership focused on achieving the team's common goals and, in doing so, helping them become the best versions of themselves. McKeown outlines the three key steps to help make the transition from Heroic Leadership to Self-Evolved Leadership, and concludes with a comprehensive 15-week program designed to help you evolve your leadership style with the kind of flexible, adaptable best practices that work to deliver results, company-wide. This book is ideal for any leader looking to: Stop working in the weeds and think more strategically Build empowerment deep in their team Free up their headspace to be more creative Deliver lasting results for their team and organization
Download or read book Working with You Is Killing Me written by Katherine Crowley and published by . This book was released on 2014-07-02 with total page 153 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This authoritative manual provides valuable insights for turning conflicts inthe workplace into productive working relationships.
Download or read book Silently Seduced written by Kenneth M. Adams and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-09-01 with total page 168 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When a parent singles out a child for special privileges and attention, that child is often unaware that the relationship is unhealthy—even incestuous. As adults, these children struggle to feel validated, because while they have not been directly abused, they feel a sense of violation and crossed boundaries—usually done in the name of 'love' and 'caring.' The parent's love feels more confining than freeing, more demanding than giving, more intrusive than nurturing. Yet these children suffer from what psychologist Kenneth Adams calls The Silent Seduction—because there is nothing loving or caring about a close parent-child relationship that services the needs of the parent rather than the child. In this revised and updated 20th anniversary edition of his groundbreaking book Silently Seduced, Dr. Adams explains how 'feeling close,' especially with the opposite-sex parent, is not the source of comfort the image suggests, especially when that child is cheated out of a childhood by being a parent's surrogate partner. He offers a framework to understand this covert incest and its effect on sexuality, intimacy, and relationships, and how victims can begin the process of recovery.
Download or read book People Pleasers written by Les Carter and published by . This book was released on 2002 with total page 199 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Killing Comparison written by Nona Jones and published by Zondervan. This book was released on 2022-09-27 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's time to leave behind the discontent of comparison and discover a free and joyful life. Join Pastor Nona Jones--who was recently featured on GMA3--as she gives you the tools you need to kill comparison once and for all. Nearly all of us deal with the struggle of comparison and finding ourselves lacking. But there is a way to break free from internal and external messages communicating a lack of self-worth. It starts with identifying the basis of your urge to compare and ends with securing your identity to the unchanging confidence of God's love for you. Nona Jones knows this journey all too well. Throughout her life and in her career--most recently as an executive for the world's largest social media company--Nona discovered that despite professional success, true confidence can only be achieved by defeating toxic comparison and securing our identity to God's approval alone. Killing Comparison provides a fresh, biblically rooted perspective on an age-old human dilemma--the pressure to compare oneself to others--that the era of social media has exacerbated and heightened. This timely and necessary guide will help you: Determine your true source of self-worth Develop practical ways to conquer daily comparison Learn how to control social media instead of letting it control you Discover how to accomplish your dreams without comparing yourself at every turn Identify the root cause leading you to compare your life to others Through practical insight and down-to-earth encouragement, Nona helps you avoid the despair of comparison and pursue a free, joyful life.
Download or read book Healing the Shame that Binds You written by John Bradshaw and published by Health Communications, Inc.. This book was released on 2005-10-15 with total page 338 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This classic book, written 17 years ago but still selling more than 13,000 copies every year, has been completely updated and expanded by the author. "I used to drink," writes John Bradshaw,"to solve the problems caused by drinking. The more I drank to relieve my shame-based loneliness and hurt, the more I felt ashamed." Shame is the motivator behind our toxic behaviors: the compulsion, co-dependency, addiction and drive to superachieve that breaks down the family and destroys personal lives. This book has helped millions identify their personal shame, understand the underlying reasons for it, address these root causes and release themselves from the shame that binds them to their past failures.
Download or read book Behave written by Robert M. Sapolsky and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2018-05-01 with total page 801 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New York Times bestseller • Winner of the Los Angeles Times Book Prize • One of the Washington Post's 10 Best Books of the Year “It’s no exaggeration to say that Behave is one of the best nonfiction books I’ve ever read.” —David P. Barash, The Wall Street Journal "It has my vote for science book of the year.” —Parul Sehgal, The New York Times "Immensely readable, often hilarious...Hands-down one of the best books I’ve read in years. I loved it." —Dina Temple-Raston, The Washington Post From the bestselling author of A Primate's Memoir and the forthcoming Determined: A Science of Life Without Free Will comes a landmark, genre-defining examination of human behavior and an answer to the question: Why do we do the things we do? Behave is one of the most dazzling tours d’horizon of the science of human behavior ever attempted. Moving across a range of disciplines, Sapolsky—a neuroscientist and primatologist—uncovers the hidden story of our actions. Undertaking some of our thorniest questions relating to tribalism and xenophobia, hierarchy and competition, and war and peace, Behave is a towering achievement—a majestic synthesis of cutting-edge research and a heroic exploration of why we ultimately do the things we do . . . for good and for ill.
Download or read book The Guide to Compassionate Assertiveness written by Sherrie Mansfield Vavrichek and published by New Harbinger Publications. This book was released on 2012-08-01 with total page 216 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Speaking up for yourself has benefits, but it has costs, too. Many people who struggle with assertiveness are paralyzed by worries that they’ll seem mean, petty, or that they will hurt the other person’s feelings. Even though they want to speak up, they may keep their true needs and opinions to themselves because of these fears—eventually building stress, resentment, and alienation. The Guide to Compassionate Assertiveness does not require that readers ignore the needs of others and focus solely on their own desires. Rather, this unique blend of cognitive behavioral therapy-based assertiveness training and Buddhist psychology helps readers practice assertiveness skills while caring deeply about the welfare of others. This book helps readers develop a form of assertiveness that emphasizes collaboration, negotiation, and compromise. It focuses on speaking up for the benefit of others and speaking up for the relationship, not just one’s own needs. In this way, readers learn to assert their needs in ways that match their compassionate value systems. This book is the ideal assertiveness guide for those who are afraid of rejection, have a deep concern for how others perceive them, often feel judged by others, or have difficulty expressing their feelings and needs. Readers learn to apply assertiveness skills in all domains of their lives, including in romantic relationships, as parents, at work, and in social settings.
Download or read book Killing Auntie written by Andrzej Bursa and published by New Vessel Press. This book was released on 2015-07-13 with total page 116 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "The Polish postwar firebrand Andrzej Bursa acquired a reputation as a quick-burning, existentially tormented rebel. . . . Yet Bursa's dark humor and deadpan satire . . . keep utter bleakness at bay."—The Independent "A revolution against the banality of everyday life."—Gazeta Krakowska A young university student named Jurek, with no particular ambitions or talents, is adrift. After his doting aunt asks him to perform a small chore, he decides to kill her for no good reason other than, perhaps, boredom. Killing Auntie follows Jurek as he seeks to dispose of the corpse—a task more difficult than one might imagine—and then falls in love with a girl he meets on a train. Can he tell her what he's done? Will that ruin everything? "I'm convinced—simply—that we are all guilty," says Jurek, and his adventures with nosy neighbors, false-toothed grandmothers, and love-making lynxes shed light on how an entire society becomes involved in the murder and disposal of dear old Auntie. This is a short comedic masterpiece combining elements of Fyodor Dostoevsky, Jean-Paul Sartre, Franz Kafka, and Joseph Heller, coming together in the end to produce an unforgettable tale of murder and—just maybe—redemption. Andrzej Bursa was born in 1934 in Krakow, Poland, and died twenty-five years later. In his brief lifetime he composed some of the most original Polish writing of the twentieth century. Killing Auntie is his only novel. His brilliant career and tragic early death established him as a cult figure among restless and disenchanted youth.
Download or read book The Anger Trap written by Les Carter and published by Jossey-Bass. This book was released on 2003-09-08 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's easy to identify rage in people who lose their temper at traffic jams, unruly children, unresponsive coworkers, and unrealistic bosses. But we may not recognize more subtle manifestations of anger, such as being uncomfortable with loose ends, acting impatiently, or being overly critical. That is anger, too. And, as is so often the case, angry folks don't seem to realize that the behavior causing them problems at home or at work actually stems from unrecognized and unresolved pain and emotional injuries from the past. Is all this negative emotion inevitable, or are there choices about how to respond, choices that can improve personal relationships as well as emotional health? The Anger Trap is a landmark book that strips away the myths and misconceptions about anger and reveals how you can learn to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy anger so that you may choose—or help someone else to choose—a better, more spiritually enlightened path. The Anger Trap examines the root causes of anger and can help you realize your patterns and break the destructive cycles of criticism, frustration, and irritation that hurt you and others around you. Drawing insight from timeless spiritual wisdom as well as cutting-edge research, Dr. Carter offers practical techniques to free you from anger, its hidden insecurities, fears, and selfishness and thereby improve the quality of your home and workplace life. The book clearly illustrates how the change process works and The Anger Trap is filled with real-life examples of the ways people have come to terms with their anger by applying the concepts Dr. Carter outlines.
Download or read book Bunny written by Mona Awad and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2020-06-09 with total page 337 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NATIONAL BESTSELLER Soon to be a major motion picture "Jon Swift + Witches of Eastwick + Kelly 'Get In Trouble' Link + Mean Girls + Creative Writing Degree Hell! No punches pulled, no hilarities dodged, no meme unmangled! O Bunny you are sooo genius!" —Margaret Atwood, via Twitter "A wild, audacious and ultimately unforgettable novel." —Michael Schaub, Los Angeles Times "Awad is a stone-cold genius." —Ann Bauer, The Washington Post The Vegetarian meets Heathers in this darkly funny, seductively strange novel from the acclaimed author of 13 Ways of Looking at a Fat Girl and Rouge "We were just these innocent girls in the night trying to make something beautiful. We nearly died. We very nearly did, didn't we?" Samantha Heather Mackey couldn't be more of an outsider in her small, highly selective MFA program at New England's Warren University. A scholarship student who prefers the company of her dark imagination to that of most people, she is utterly repelled by the rest of her fiction writing cohort--a clique of unbearably twee rich girls who call each other "Bunny," and seem to move and speak as one. But everything changes when Samantha receives an invitation to the Bunnies' fabled "Smut Salon," and finds herself inexplicably drawn to their front door--ditching her only friend, Ava, in the process. As Samantha plunges deeper and deeper into the Bunnies' sinister yet saccharine world, beginning to take part in the ritualistic off-campus "Workshop" where they conjure their monstrous creations, the edges of reality begin to blur. Soon, her friendships with Ava and the Bunnies will be brought into deadly collision. The spellbinding new novel from one of our most fearless chroniclers of the female experience, Bunny is a down-the-rabbit-hole tale of loneliness and belonging, friendship and desire, and the fantastic and terrible power of the imagination. Named a Best Book of 2019 by TIME, Vogue, Electric Literature, and The New York Public Library
Download or read book Ugly Love written by Laura Charanza and published by Bookbaby. This book was released on 2018-09 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Have you ever felt like a normal discussionturns into him raging at you, while you cower inthe corner, not certain what just happenedto set him off? Have you felt like you would be punished if you stand up for yourself? Have you everbeen told you are imagining things and everyone thinks you're crazy? Have youbeen told no one else could ever love you?Have you been led to believe this is all your fault?If you feel like you are living a fairy taleturned nightmare, then you may be a victim of narcissistic abuse. Abusive relationships with a narcissist follow a specific pattern. There's the initial stage of love bombing, where he's prince charming and you are his princess and soulmate. Then, the debasement starts. The rules start changing. Just whenyou think you know what he wants, the standards change again. Then he isolatesyou. You aren't allowed to see family and friends. If you do, you are punished with silence or rancid accusations. Then,there's the escalation of conversations into turbulent arguments, only for him to apologize and startthe cycle all over again.If you feel hopeless, don't. There is a way out, and your exit plan begins with understanding whatyou are going through and how you endedup there.Narcissism is a spectrum disorder. A person can exhibit a few symptoms of being a narcissist, or enough traits to be diagnosed with the full blown narcissistic personality disorder. There's ambivalence on the partof psychologists and other experts on whether a narcissist can change. So, whatdo you do? Do you stay or do you go? Canyour partner be the one who changes? Laura Charanza is a survivor of forty years of narcissistic abuse. Laura has worked with psychologists, physicians, life coaches and spiritual healers to understand narcissism and a narcissist's victims. With empathy and transparency, lLaura tells, first hand, the story of a typical and toxic relationship with a narcissist. Butunderstand that there isa way out, and here is where your journeyto freedom, peace and true love can begin
Download or read book The Book of Longings written by Sue Monk Kidd and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2020-04-21 with total page 434 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “An extraordinary novel . . . a triumph of insight and storytelling.” —Associated Press “A true masterpiece.” —Glennon Doyle, author of Untamed An extraordinary story set in the first century about a woman who finds her voice and her destiny, from the celebrated number one New York Times bestselling author of The Secret Life of Bees and The Invention of Wings In her mesmerizing fourth work of fiction, Sue Monk Kidd takes an audacious approach to history and brings her acclaimed narrative gifts to imagine the story of a young woman named Ana. Raised in a wealthy family with ties to the ruler of Galilee, she is rebellious and ambitious, with a brilliant mind and a daring spirit. She engages in furtive scholarly pursuits and writes narratives about neglected and silenced women. Ana is expected to marry an older widower, a prospect that horrifies her. An encounter with eighteen-year-old Jesus changes everything. Their marriage evolves with love and conflict, humor and pathos in Nazareth, where Ana makes a home with Jesus, his brothers, and their mother, Mary. Ana's pent-up longings intensify amid the turbulent resistance to Rome's occupation of Israel, partially led by her brother, Judas. She is sustained by her fearless aunt Yaltha, who harbors a compelling secret. When Ana commits a brazen act that puts her in peril, she flees to Alexandria, where startling revelations and greater dangers unfold, and she finds refuge in unexpected surroundings. Ana determines her fate during a stunning convergence of events considered among the most impactful in human history. Grounded in meticulous research and written with a reverential approach to Jesus's life that focuses on his humanity, The Book of Longings is an inspiring, unforgettable account of one woman's bold struggle to realize the passion and potential inside her, while living in a time, place and culture devised to silence her. It is a triumph of storytelling both timely and timeless, from a masterful writer at the height of her powers.
