Download or read book The Little Red Book Of Little Read Jokes about the Enlightened Left written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2019-05-11 with total page 93 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Version 2.0 (2023). Much like Chairman Mao's compilation of zany one-liners published during Communist China's Cultural Revolution back in the day, this little red book is an uproarious collection of madcap humor and senseless drivel dedicated to the countless enlightened leftists still inexplicably omnipresent in our world today. Filled with pun-ridden put-downs and wise-ass wordplay, this remarkable anthology offers unenlightened readers like yourself a thorough introduction into the baffling realm of leftist confusion and a refreshing alternative to the more conventional fare of lowbrow humor you are undoubtedly accustomed to. Your fancy will be tickled with jeering jibes and sarcastic swipes taken at the expense of the leftist elites who rule over us in relentless pursuit of a more progressive and enlightened new world order. But just who are these enlightened leftists of the enlightened left, you ask? I’m glad you did. Enlightened leftists are those who believe that man is “perfectible” (woman too, if we stick to two genders). They believe in equality in a world in which equality does not and cannot exist (there is no equality in nature). They are the ones who always have the “solutions” to our problems, most of these problems being the direct or indirect result of one of their previous enlightened leftist solutions. The enlightened left are the all too optimistic and the all too naïve with the all too good intentions who seem to be the only ones unaware that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. They are also unaware of their inherent limitations as human beings. They refuse to recognize that we are simply not able to fully understand all the ramifications of our simplest actions, much less the ambitious enlightened leftist reforms they have and repeatedly tried and will try again to introduce. They are rationalists whose reason is not sufficiently able to point out the limitations of their reason. In other words, they are the nannies, the pro-collectivist, the anti-self-reliant, the redistributors and the interventionists who have become so intrusive in our lives today. They can’t accept the idea of government as a system of negation within which individuals can freely develop on their own under the rule of law (a “don't do this, don't do that” model). Enlightened leftists insist that government actively intervene in our lives (a “do this, do that” model), always open for the next “solution” that 1) never delivers the results promised and 2) creates new problems due to the inevitable Law of Unintended Consequences. Enlightened leftists are paternal. They are autocratic. They are above the law because what they do is for “the greater good” that they define. They believe that the ends justify the means. They are the people who say, “we are from the government and are here to help.” The enlightened left are those who refuse to leave the rest of us alone. Although not famous for their sense of humor (telling others how to live their lives and what to think is no laughing matter), enlightened leftists nevertheless provide us with a near endless source of comic delight. This little red book is a modest attempt to tap into that vital source. I hope you will enjoy reading it. I also hope you will remember to buy a few additional copies for your friends and family. I am told it makes a wonderful gift idea, perfect, even, for any perfect or near-perfect stranger you might unexpectedly bump into on the street. It is a very small book. This makes it very easy for you to carry several of them on your person. I carry three of them with me at all times, for instance. I am sitting on two right now as I write these very lines. In closing, please try to keep two things constantly in mind while reading: First of all, many if not most of the enlightened left mean well. Honestly. They really do. Secondly, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
Download or read book 501 German Oddities written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2018-11-25 with total page 188 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Do you often feel the uncontrollable urge to drive at ridiculously high speeds when out on the freeway? Does that constant, nagging struggle between the opposing sides of your inferiority-superiority complex keep you up at night? Are you brutally direct, painfully precise and sometimes feel like you’re speaking a foreign language because no one seems to understand you? Vorsicht (watch out)! You might be German. In that case you won’t have any use for this book. Have a nice day. If, on the other hand, you have always been puzzled by odd German Attitudes, Behavior or Cultural practices, then this is the book for you. You are not alone, you see. Nor is there anything wrong with you reacting that way. Your puzzlement is a perfectly healthy and normal human response to the cognitive dissonance and other psychological disrruptions that often dissonate and disrupt when foreigners make unprotected contact with high-grade Germanness. Or at least that’s what a specialist in Vienna told me. As Winston Churchill once said, “Germany is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.” Actually, he said Russia when he said that but I’m pretty sure he meant Germany. He was Winston Churchill, after all, and he had been around a bit. I certainly would have said Germany. And I wouldn’t, much less couldn’t have said it better myself. Germany and the Germans are indeed enigmatic and, well, really weird sometimes. This collection of random personal observations and unsolicited opinion is an attempt to document just that. I cannot guarantee that this list of German oddities is complete, of course. I can assure you, however, that enjoying these oddities in the privacy of your own home is a relatively safe and effective way to partake in the German experience without any of the harmful side effects. Viel Glück dabei (and good luck with that).
Download or read book Brain Quest written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2017-12-17 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mission Nemo simply must succeed. If the crew of the Super Small Miniaturized Nano-like Operations Wessel S. S. Minnow fails to destroy the inoperable anti-capitalist coagulum lodged in Morris Moore's progressive brain, how will General De Klein's Federal Department of Antidotes operatives at SUCFACE Mission Control find out if Leftylometazoline (aka LeftX) really works? Would this usher in the final stage of the liberal clerisy’s clandestine collectivist conspiracy to abolish our few remaining individual freedoms forever? That would not please President Thump one microscopic little bit. Join Major Miles Stone and his disturbingly alluring crew on their miniaturized mission through the left and lefter hemispheres of the progressive brain. Their fantastic voyage is a race against time that takes them through such redoubtable regions as the Clinton Vortex, the Che Guevara Gray Area and the Obama Trauma Center itself. Here they bravely confront such anatomical monstrosities as the fantasist frontalis, the hyperbolthalamus and the dreaded pious aspiration node. Their progressive brain journey only gets progressively worse as they are repeatedly attacked by repulsive swarms of nanny neurons, doomsday dendrons, robin hoodlums and the formidable radical egalitarian bacterium. If not for the courage of the fearless crew, and their deadly arsenal of passing phasers, millennial mindset missiles, moral busybody antibodies and Condescendium®, the Minnow would be lost. The Minnow would be lost. The tension never stops building during this thrilling tale of adventure, danger, suspense and romance. And lust. Will Captain Hanna Grenada's irresistible animal magnetism finally seduce the Major into experiencing something vaguely resembling basic human emotion? Can the all too communicative HAL 9999 super computer and his annoying eye drones really be trusted to operate the ship? And will the Minnow's political corrector deflectors and smug shields hold, allowing Stone and his crew to reach their target and ignite the liberal bombast bomb in time? I could tell you but that would ruin the suspense. Not your everyday dystopian science-fiction erotic horror political thriller, this bombastic bombshell of a book knows no shame when it comes to overwhelming you with its serious silliness, wanton wackiness and forthright, flat-out farce. Purchase it now before it is too late or something. Soon to be made into a major motion picture. Or maybe it has been already. There is also time travel involved here, after all.
Download or read book Climate Crisis Fun Facts written by Hermann Observer and published by Hermann Observer. This book was released on 2023-09-21 with total page 160 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Take a deep breath. It’s time for Climate Crisis Fun Fact Number One: There is no Climate Crisis. The weather is not your fault. The climate (weather over time) is not your fault either. Yes, the climate is changing. It is changing because it has never not changed. But no, the “pollutant” CO2, anthropogenic or otherwise, is not driving this change. It is driving plant growth. The narrative you are being led to believe is false. The causes for climate change are all natural. Natural, although not yet fully understood. This book is an exercise in humility. It aims to offer those who feel uncomfortable with the arrogant CO2 Climate Crisis consensus of our age a chance to step back and doubt. It is a modest collection of well-documented facts and logical observations that will hopefully help you choose to refuse. Choose to refuse believing those who profit financially or in any other way from the CO2 narrative.
Download or read book The Sense of an Ending written by Julian Barnes and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2011-10-05 with total page 158 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: BOOKER PRIZE WINNER • NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A novel that follows a middle-aged man as he contends with a past he never much thought about—until his closest childhood friends return with a vengeance: one of them from the grave, another maddeningly present. A novel so compelling that it begs to be read in a single setting, The Sense of an Ending has the psychological and emotional depth and sophistication of Henry James at his best, and is a stunning achievement in Julian Barnes's oeuvre. Tony Webster thought he left his past behind as he built a life for himself, and his career has provided him with a secure retirement and an amicable relationship with his ex-wife and daughter, who now has a family of her own. But when he is presented with a mysterious legacy, he is forced to revise his estimation of his own nature and place in the world.
Download or read book Rachel s Homemade Holiday Pudding Pantry Book 2 written by Caroline Roberts and published by HarperCollins UK. This book was released on 2019-10-31 with total page 432 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This Christmas, home is where the heart is . . .
Download or read book Christopher Cricket on Cats written by Anthony Henderson Euwer and published by . This book was released on 1909 with total page 54 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Harper s Weekly written by John Bonner and published by . This book was released on 1857 with total page 868 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Sophie s World written by Jostein Gaarder and published by Farrar, Straus and Giroux. This book was released on 2007-03-20 with total page 735 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A page-turning novel that is also an exploration of the great philosophical concepts of Western thought, Jostein Gaarder's Sophie's World has fired the imagination of readers all over the world, with more than twenty million copies in print. One day fourteen-year-old Sophie Amundsen comes home from school to find in her mailbox two notes, with one question on each: "Who are you?" and "Where does the world come from?" From that irresistible beginning, Sophie becomes obsessed with questions that take her far beyond what she knows of her Norwegian village. Through those letters, she enrolls in a kind of correspondence course, covering Socrates to Sartre, with a mysterious philosopher, while receiving letters addressed to another girl. Who is Hilde? And why does her mail keep turning up? To unravel this riddle, Sophie must use the philosophy she is learning—but the truth turns out to be far more complicated than she could have imagined.
Download or read book Drums Girls and Dangerous Pie written by Jordan Sonnenblick and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2010-01-01 with total page 165 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A brave and beautiful story that will make readers laugh, and break their hearts at the same time. Now with a special note from the author! Steven has a totally normal life (well, almost).He plays drums in the All-City Jazz Band (whose members call him the Peasant), has a crush on the hottest girl in school (who doesn't even know he's alive), and is constantly annoyed by his younger brother, Jeffrey (who is cuter than cute - which is also pretty annoying). But when Jeffrey gets sick, Steven's world is turned upside down, and he is forced to deal with his brother's illness, his parents' attempts to keep the family in one piece, his homework, the band, girls, and Dangerous Pie (yes, you'll have to read the book to find out what that is!).
Download or read book Crying in H Mart written by Michelle Zauner and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2021-04-20 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • From the indie rock sensation known as Japanese Breakfast, an unforgettable memoir about family, food, grief, love, and growing up Korean American—“in losing her mother and cooking to bring her back to life, Zauner became herself” (NPR). • CELEBRATING OVER ONE YEAR ON THE NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER LIST In this exquisite story of family, food, grief, and endurance, Michelle Zauner proves herself far more than a dazzling singer, songwriter, and guitarist. With humor and heart, she tells of growing up one of the few Asian American kids at her school in Eugene, Oregon; of struggling with her mother's particular, high expectations of her; of a painful adolescence; of treasured months spent in her grandmother's tiny apartment in Seoul, where she and her mother would bond, late at night, over heaping plates of food. As she grew up, moving to the East Coast for college, finding work in the restaurant industry, and performing gigs with her fledgling band--and meeting the man who would become her husband--her Koreanness began to feel ever more distant, even as she found the life she wanted to live. It was her mother's diagnosis of terminal cancer, when Michelle was twenty-five, that forced a reckoning with her identity and brought her to reclaim the gifts of taste, language, and history her mother had given her. Vivacious and plainspoken, lyrical and honest, Zauner's voice is as radiantly alive on the page as it is onstage. Rich with intimate anecdotes that will resonate widely, and complete with family photos, Crying in H Mart is a book to cherish, share, and reread.
Download or read book The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind written by Julian Jaynes and published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. This book was released on 2000-08-15 with total page 580 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: National Book Award Finalist: “This man’s ideas may be the most influential, not to say controversial, of the second half of the twentieth century.”—Columbus Dispatch At the heart of this classic, seminal book is Julian Jaynes's still-controversial thesis that human consciousness did not begin far back in animal evolution but instead is a learned process that came about only three thousand years ago and is still developing. The implications of this revolutionary scientific paradigm extend into virtually every aspect of our psychology, our history and culture, our religion—and indeed our future. “Don’t be put off by the academic title of Julian Jaynes’s The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind. Its prose is always lucid and often lyrical…he unfolds his case with the utmost intellectual rigor.”—The New York Times “When Julian Jaynes . . . speculates that until late in the twentieth millennium BC men had no consciousness but were automatically obeying the voices of the gods, we are astounded but compelled to follow this remarkable thesis.”—John Updike, The New Yorker “He is as startling as Freud was in The Interpretation of Dreams, and Jaynes is equally as adept at forcing a new view of known human behavior.”—American Journal of Psychiatry
Download or read book Zozimus written by and published by . This book was released on 1871 with total page 460 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book The Cultivator Country Gentleman written by and published by . This book was released on 1894 with total page 980 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Via Negativa written by Daniel Hornsby and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2021-07-06 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A heartfelt, daring, divinely hilarious debut novel about a priest who embarks on a fateful journey with a pistol in his pocket and an injured coyote in his backseat. "A beautiful and meditative exploration of shattered faith." —Brit Bennett, author of The Vanishing Half Father Dan is homeless. Dismissed by his conservative diocese for eccentricity and insubordination, he’s made his exile into a kind of pilgrimage, transforming his Toyota Camry into a mobile monk’s cell. Then he sees a minivan sideswipe a coyote. Unable to suppress his Franciscan impulses, he takes the injured animal in. With his unexpected canine companion in the backseat, Dan makes his way west, encountering other offbeat travelers and stopping to take in the occasional roadside novelty (MARTIN'S HOLE TO HELL, WORLD-FAMOUS BOTTOMLESS PIT NEXT EXIT!). But the coyote is far from the only oddity fate has delivered into this churchless priest’s care: it has also given him a bone-handled pistol, a box of bullets, and a letter from an estranged friend. By the time Dan gets to where he’s going, he’ll be forced to reckon once and for all with the great mistakes of his past, and he will have to decide: is penance better paid with revenge, or with redemption?
Download or read book The Athenaeum written by and published by . This book was released on 1858 with total page 1032 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Pimp written by Iceberg Slim and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-05-10 with total page 308 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “[In Pimp], Iceberg Slim breaks down some of the coldest, capitalist concepts I’ve ever heard in my life.” —Dave Chappelle, from his Nextflix special The Bird Revelation Pimp sent shockwaves throughout the literary world when it published in 1969. Iceberg Slim’s autobiographical novel offered readers a never-before-seen account of the sex trade, and an unforgettable look at the mores of Chicago’s street life during the 1940s, 50s, and 60s. In the preface, Slim says it best, “In this book, I will take you, the reader, with me into the secret inner world of the pimp.” An immersive experience unlike anything before it, Pimp would go on to sell millions of copies, with translations throughout the world. And it would have a profound impact upon generations of writers, entertainers, and filmmakers, making it the classic hustler’s tale that never seems to go out of style.
