Download or read book Hamish the Hairy Haggis written by A. K. Paterson and published by W.F. Graham. This book was released on 2005-05-01 with total page 30 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hamish the Hairy Haggis lives in the highlands of Scotland. Once a year, it is hairy haggis hunting season and the Bashers and Mashers are out to catch him!

Download or read book The Macsween Haggis Bible written by Jo Macsween and published by . This book was released on 2024-07-16 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this informative and light-hearted book, Jo Macsween of the famous family of Edinburgh haggis makers, expertly guides you through the myths and magic to a new realm of haggis appreciation that transcends neeps, tatties and Burns Night. Featuring fifty mouth-watering recipes.

Download or read book Your Disgusting Head written by Doris Haggis-On-Whey and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2010-06-15 with total page 72 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In Your Disgusting Head, Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-on-Whey reveal—through newly discovered discoveries—all the ways in which your head disappoints you. For many years the scientific and educational community has wondered and worried about the possibility that semi-sane scholar-pretenders would find the means to put out a series of reference books, filled with ludicrous misinformation and aimed at children. Well, we offer you Your Disgusting Head by Dr. and Mr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey. A world-renowned and much feared expert on everything, Dr. Doris Haggis-On-Whey has seventeen degrees from eighteen institutions of higher learning. With her husband, Benny, she has traveled the world many times over, has learned about all aspects of life, including outer space and food, first hand. The human body is beautiful and mysterious. The mysterious part reeks of cheese. But no part of your body is as scary and horrifying as your head! In Your Disgusting Head, you’ll find amazing information, such as: · The ear was invented and designed by Feranando de la Mancini Goldfarb, in 1911, which was also a good year for yeast. · Good Reasons for teeth removal: dentist did it; peer pressure; not sharp enough; found better teeth, like, on the ground; suspected of enjoying flossing; decay and mouth politics. · The real reason your ears can't hear your pets talking. The answer is simple: your pet is a mumbler." With the wit and irreverent sense of humor for which Dave Eggers and McSweeney's is known, comes the second volume in the revolutionary Haggis-On-Whey World of Unbelievable Brilliance books. More than just entertaining and informative, Your Disgusting Head will help you appear smarter, more in touch with your sensitive side and whiten your teeth. And much, much more that will likely sicken you.

Download or read book Why Did the Haggis Cross the Road and Other Scottish Jokes written by Stuart McLean and published by Crombie Jardine Publishing. This book was released on 2008-06-30 with total page 66 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When the Scots tell a joke it's usually at their own expense. So this collection of gems pokes fun at just about everyone and everything from kilts and haggis through footie and thriftiness to Sassenachs, Teeries, and Glaswegians. Some of the jokes are old favourites retold, some are brand new, and some are a few specimens found on that internet thingy which have been massaged to make them almost funny.

Download or read book Haggis History Facts written by Mandy Elizabeth Rush and published by . This book was released on 2018 with total page 35 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Children and the Tundra written by Doris Haggis-on-Whey and published by McSweeney's. This book was released on 2016-04-12 with total page 61 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The fifth volume in the ludicrously misinformative HOW Series. For many years the scientific and educational community has wondered and worried about the possibility that semi-sane scholar pretenders would find the means to put out a series of reference books aimed at children but filled with ludicrous misinformation. These books would be distributed through respectable channels and would inevitably find their way into the hands and households of well-meaning families, who would go to them for facts but instead find bizarre untruths. The books would look normal enough, but would read as if written by people who should at all costs be denied access to pens and pencils. Sadly, with the publication of this, the fifth volume in a proposed series of 377 reference books, that day has come. Children and the Tundra is actually two books in one, as Dr. Doris Haggis-on-Whey, due to space constraints, is forced to explain both the concept of children—a species she doesn’t trust for a second—and the tundra, in one book. She is, as always, joined in her crusade of lies by her husband, Benny, who is mostly useless.

Download or read book Horace the Haggis written by Sally Magnusson and published by . This book was released on 2014-08-20 with total page 48 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Horace the Haggis, homeless and hunted, finds refuge among the animals of Acre Valley. But Angus McPhee, chief of the haggis hunters, and his deadly cat are out to trap him. Can a flower-eating fox, a mouse, a rook, two magpies on Twitter and the efforts of the Mole Patrol help Horace escape before he is caught in a net and boiled for dinner?

Download or read book All Paws on Deck A Branches Book Haggis and Tank Unleashed 1 written by Jessica Young and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2016-01-05 with total page 88 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet Haggis and Tank--two dogs with BIG imaginations! Pick a book. Grow a reader! This series is part of Scholastic's early chapter book line called Branches, which is aimed at newly independent readers. With easy-to-read text, high-interest content, fast-paced plots, and illustrations on every page, these books will boost reading confidence and stamina. Branches books help readers grow!Tank is an outgoing Great Dane. Haggis is a grumpy Scottie dog. In the first book in the series, Haggis and Tank set sail as pirates. At first, Haggis doesn't see what Tank does--that an adventure awaits them with just a little imagination! But soon, Haggis joins in and the two friends go on a pirate adventure. They talk like pirates, swab the deck, and even search for buried treasure. This series is full of clever wordplay and homophones that make Haggis and Tank's adventures even more fun!

Download or read book Why Did the Haggis Cross the Road written by Stuart McLean and published by . This book was released on 2008-06 with total page 160 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This little book doesn't merely poke fun at Sassenachs, Glaswegians, Aberdonians, Dundonians and Teeries. No, it manages to have a go at everyone. From kilts and haggis to whisky, footie and thriftiness, this hilarious collection of Scottish jokes is a Nevis of Laughs. XXXXXA Scotsman walking through a field, sees a man drinking water from a pool with his hand. The Scotsman shouts, "Awa ye eijit, can ye no tell that's a foo o coos keich?!" (Translated: Begone you idiot, can't you tell it's full of cow shit?!) The man shouts back, "I'm English. Speak English, I don't understand you!" To which the Scotsman wholeheartedly responds, "Use both hands, you'll get more in." XXXX Bono, lead singer of the rock band U2, is famous throughout the entertainment industry for being more than just a little self-righteous. At a U2 concert in Glasgow, Scotland, he asked the audience for total quiet. Then, in the silence, he slowly started to clap his hands, once every few seconds. Holding the audience in total silence, he said into the microphone, "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies." A voice with a broad Scottish accent from the front of the crowd pierced the quiet... "Well, foockin stop doin it then, ya evil bastard!"

Download or read book Animals of the Ocean in Particular the Giant Squid written by Doris Haggis-On-Whey and published by McSweeneys Books. This book was released on 2006 with total page 62 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Shares humorous misinformation about marine animals, including the duties of squid appendages, what water does on weekends, shark religion, and the kind of music that giant squids listen to on the train.

Download or read book All Paws on Deck written by Jessica Young and published by . This book was released on 2018-09 with total page 72 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: After reading a book about pirates, Tank decides that she and Haggis should sail the seas. Though they have no boat and no sea, they do have a wagon and a lot of imagination! From PW: ''Loads of goofy humor and an appealing comics-early reader format make for an all-around entertaining read.''

Download or read book Howl at the Moon written by Jessica E. Young and published by Scholastic Incorporated. This book was released on 2017 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this adventure Tank the Great Dane's active imagination takes her and Haggis the Scotty on a airplane trip to Scotland, where they visit a castle, enjoy high tea--and get chased by a werewolf.

Download or read book Digging for Dinos A Branches Book Haggis and Tank Unleashed 2 written by Jessica Young and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2016-02-23 with total page 88 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet Haggis and Tank--two dogs with BIG imaginations! This series is part of Scholastic's early chapter book line called Branches, which is aimed at newly independent readers. With easy-to-read text, high-interest content, fast-paced plots, and illustrations on every page, these books will boost reading confidence and stamina. Branches books help readers grow!Haggis and Tank's big imaginations take them on a search for real live dinosaurs! They build a nest for dino eggs and play baseball with a triceratops. But then the ground starts shaking. Is a T-rex chasing Haggis and Tank? Or could something else be headed their way? This series is full of clever wordplay and homophones that make Haggis and Tank's adventures even more fun!

Download or read book The Haggis written by Clarissa Dickson Wright and published by Pelican Publishing. This book was released on 1998-01-01 with total page 64 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The author, one of the "Two Fat Ladies" of television cookbook fame, handles the history of the haggis with aplomb in this little cookbook. Haggis, for the unititated, is a dish commonly made in a sheep's maw, of minced lungs, hearts, and liver of the same animal. However, the haggis is much more than a mere meal. The haggis, or some version of it, may be found in the histories of countries as varied as ancient Greece, Sweden, and the United States. Yet the haggis is most closely associated with Scotland and has come to represent that country just as pasta represents Italy. Scotland may thank its beloved bard, Robert Burns, for this. Burns immortalized the dish in perhaps his best-known poem, "Address to the Haggis." In it, he refers to the haggis as the "Great Chieftan o' the Puddin'-race!" How far the haggis had come! Originally a meal of the lower classes who could not afford to waste any edible portion of their livestock, the haggis mysteriously transformed into a delicacy deemed worthy of royalty. Queen Victoria, an enthusiast for most all things Scottish, said of the haggis, "I find I like it very well." Clans and Tartans, A Little Book of Scottish Baking, and A Life of Robert Burns are the other books in Pelican's Little Book series.

Download or read book Howl at the Moon A Branches Book Haggis and Tank Unleashed 3 written by Jessica Young and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2017-05-09 with total page 88 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Haggis and Tank get chased by a werewolf! Pick a book. Grow a reader! This series is part of Scholastic's early chapter book line called Branches, which is aimed at newly independent readers. With easy-to-read text, high-interest content, fast-paced plots, and illustrations on every page, these books will boost reading confidence and stamina. Branches books help readers grow!In the third book in the series, Haggis and Tank's imaginations take them across the globe -- to Scotland! They fly an airplane, visit a castle, play bagpipes, and even get chased by a... werewolf?! This series is full of clever wordplay and homophones that make Haggis and Tank's adventures even more fun! And James Burks' engaging, full-color artwork appears on every page!

Download or read book Digging for Dinos written by Jessica Young and published by . This book was released on 2018-09 with total page 72 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Haggis and Tank's big imaginations take them on a search for dinosaurs! But their fun is interrupted when the ground starts shaking. Could it be a T-rex chasing the friends? From Booklist: ''The delightful pooch duo shines in this entertaining, fast-paced, and fun read.''

Download or read book The F King Book written by Allan Wood and published by AuthorHouse. This book was released on 2006-10-03 with total page 430 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: These writings are a celebration of the evolution of our habitat and its inhabitants from time immemorial to present day. Together with our singular appreciation for the most spoken word of all time, a word that conveys different emotions, has multiple meanings, a word that is never used out of context, always grammatically correct, spans cultural, geographical, political and national barriers, brings all communications to a level playing field. This book is dedicated to everyone who is misguided enough to believe the world has evolved au natural. Hopefully, once reading this literary milestone you will come to realise this worlds original inhabitants were put here by some Universal Interplanetary Council Correctional Department to facilitate their rehabilitation, all of these early settlers were undoubtedly mentally and/or criminally insane and have unwittingly spawned what we know today as a seething mass of institutionalised and certifiable nutters of which you are undoubtedly one.