Download or read book That Bear Ate My Pants written by Tony Slater and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2012-12-12 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: There comes a time in every man's life when he says to himself, "Holy Sh*t! I'm about to be eaten by a bear!"Tony James Slater went to Ecuador, determined to become a man.It never occurred to him that 'or die trying' might be an option...The trouble with volunteering in a South American animal refuge is that everything wants a piece of you. And the trouble with being Tony, is that most of them got one.Just how do you 'look after' something that's trying it's damnedest to kill you and eat you?And how do you find love when you a) don't speak the language, and b) are constantly covered in excrement and entrails?If only he'd had some relevant experience. Other than owning a pet rabbit when he was nine. And if only he'd bought some travel insurance...That Bear Ate My Pants is the hilarious tale of one man's quest to better himself. Whether losing a machete fight with a tree, picking dead tarantulas out of a tank of live ones or sewing the head back on to a partially decapitated crocodile, Tony's misadventures are ridiculous, unbelievable and always entertaining.Long before Sky One got involved, there were already plenty of Idiots Abroad. This is the story of one of them...

Download or read book Summary of Tony James Slater s That Bear Ate My Pants written by Milkyway Media and published by Milkyway Media. This book was released on 2024-01-30 with total page 16 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Get the Summary of Tony James Slater's That Bear Ate My Pants in 20 minutes. Please note: This is a summary & not the original book. "That Bear Ate My Pants" is the humorous and heartfelt memoir of Tony James Slater's time volunteering at the Santa Martha Animal Rescue Centre in Ecuador. After leaving his acting career and a brief stint back home, Slater impulsively decides to volunteer at the refuge, despite having no experience with animals. His journey to the center is filled with misadventures, including a tense encounter with a local farmer and a confusing taxi ride...

Download or read book Kamikaze Kangaroos written by Tony James Slater and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2015-05-29 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Tony James Slater knew nothing about Australia. Except for the fact that he'd just arrived there. The stage is set for an outrageous adventure: three people, one van, on an epic, 20,000 mile road trip around Australia. What could possibly go wrong? Of course, the van - nicknamed 'Rusty' - is a crumbling wreck, held together by the world's most garish paint job. They're criss-crossing the continent through some of the most inhospitable land on the planet - the infamous Aussie Outback. And isn't there something about Australian animals being... well, you know, kind of dangerous? Unprepared, under-qualified and hopelessly inept, Tony battles gigantic pumpkins, mechanical mishaps and suicidal kangaroos, armed only with a thong and a sense of humour. His companions struggle to keep him safe whilst climbing in drag, snowboarding off cliffs, and hiking hundreds of miles through the bush. One thing's for sure; this 'adventure of a lifetime' - if they survive it - is something they're never going to forget. So, scull those stubbies! Grab your galahs! And put down that platypus. LOOK OUT, AUSTRALIA! There's an idiot coming...

Download or read book Don t Need the Whole Dog written by Tony James Slater and published by CreateSpace. This book was released on 2015-05-04 with total page 386 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Back by popular demand... In the summer of 2004, Tony James Slater went to Ecuador, looking to become a man. Not all of him returned. But the bit that did was fuelled by a burning desire to do... something. Something that mattered. And, ideally, to get the hell out of England in the process. His dream was to blatantly steal his friend Toby's dream - of going to Thailand and becoming a professional diver. But when a man like this goes on a search for adventure - well, it's bound to end in tears. And yet - what can actually go wrong? I mean, really? With renovating a house? With volunteering? With sailing? And diving? Surely, those are the kind of activities that any old idiot can pull off? But then, this isn't just any old idiot. This is Tony James Slater - the man who was convincingly mauled by a domestic cat. And to make things worse - he's not alone... So batten down the hatches! Lock up your power tools! And for gawd's sake turn the electricity off. Because that idiot from Ecuador is back. And this time, he's brought the whole family... This book is the second in the series, following on from 'That Bear Ate My Pants!', which chronicles Tony's misadventures in an Ecuadorian animal refuge. It is followed by 'Kamikaze Kangaroos!', which charts his trip around Australia in a van called Rusty... They can all be read as stand-alone books, or together.

Download or read book I Want My Hat Back written by Jon Klassen and published by Candlewick Press. This book was released on 2016-10-25 with total page 41 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A New York Times Best Illustrated Children's Book of 2011! A picture-book delight by a rising talent tells a cumulative tale with a mischievous twist. Features an audio read-along! The bear’s hat is gone, and he wants it back. Patiently and politely, he asks the animals he comes across, one by one, whether they have seen it. Each animal says no, some more elaborately than others. But just as the bear begins to despond, a deer comes by and asks a simple question that sparks the bear’s memory and renews his search with a vengeance. Told completely in dialogue, this delicious take on the classic repetitive tale plays out in sly illustrations laced with visual humor-- and winks at the reader with a wry irreverence that will have kids of all ages thrilled to be in on the joke.

Download or read book Bella Coola Man written by Clayton Mack and published by Madeira Park, B.C. : Harbour Pub.. This book was released on 2002 with total page 238 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Clayton Mack was a child, his parents wrapped him in wolf skin and dumped him in water four times so he would grow up strong and fierce in the woods like a wolf. True to this Nuxalk tradition, Mack grew up to be a world-famous grizzly bear hunter and guide. Clayton Mack's first book of amazing tales about bears and q'umsciwas (white men), Grizzlies and White Guys, became an instant best seller when it was published in 1993. In Bella Coola Man, Clayton Mack continues his hair-raising stories about pulling bears out of the bushes by their legs, eating fresh bear meat with Thor Heyerdahl, finding gold nuggets in the bush, murder in the Big Ootsa country and dead men's talking beans, plus Crooked Jaw the Indian agent and where to find good fishing. Clayton Mack was a walking encyclopedia of tribal lore, and one of the best storytellers ever born. The stories in Bella Coola Man are the last he told, and reflect his desire to pass on as much information about Nuxalk life and legends as he could before his death. Hear about the man-eater dance performed at River's Inlet where the dancers ate a dead woman's head, or about the last Indian war on the coast, native remedies like devil's club tea which is "good for anything," Alexander Mackenzie's travels through Bella Coola country along the Grease Trail, how native hunters killed mountain goats by prying them off cliffs with sticks, and about forgotten villages and places, which come alive again through Clayton Mack's words. Clayton Mack had a deep understanding and appreciation of life on British Columbia's rugged coast. His stories are unique lessons in history, as well as pure entertainment. Here are the stories of the legend himself, Clayton Mack.

Download or read book Has Anyone Seen My Pants written by Sarah Colonna and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2015-03-31 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New York Times bestselling author of Life as I Blow It Sarah Colonna is back with a hilarious, honest look at life in her late thirties—in all its messy, pants-missing glory. How does a gal with a successful career, great friends, and a razor-sharp wit find herself wandering pants-less through the hallways of a casino hotel in Iowa on New Year’s Eve? Ask Sarah Colonna. Has Anyone Seen My Pants? is a laugh-out-loud trip around America (and Mexico!) with Sarah as she braves crying in nail salons, mother-daughter road trips, Iowan casinos, and single-shaming resorts. From a fling-gone-wrong to friend breakups and a new romance, Sarah’s signature wit and sharp observations take you on a journey at once so deviously funny and surprisingly compassionate that it might just steal your heart—not to mention your pants.

Download or read book Real Ponies Don t Go Oink written by Patrick F. McManus and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 1992-06-15 with total page 208 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Bestsellers by America's favorite humorist: -A Fine And Pleasant Misery They Shoot Canoes, Don't They? Never Sniff A Gift Fish The Grasshopper Trap Rubber Legs And White Tail-hairs The Night The Bear Ate Goombaw Whatchagot Stew (with Patricia "The Troll" McManus Gass) Real Ponies Don't Go Oink The Good Samaritan Strikes Again How I Got This Way These titles are available from Henry Hold and Company.

Download or read book Go the F k to Sleep written by Adam Mansbach and published by Akashic Books. This book was released on 2011-06-14 with total page 18 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times Bestseller: “A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep” (NPR). “Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.” Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.

Download or read book The Book with No Pictures written by B. J. Novak and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2014-09-30 with total page 49 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A #1 New York Times bestseller, this innovative and wildly funny read-aloud by award-winning humorist/actor B.J. Novak will turn any reader into a comedian—a perfect gift for any special occasion! You might think a book with no pictures seems boring and serious. Except . . . here’s how books work. Everything written on the page has to be said by the person reading it aloud. Even if the words say . . . BLORK. Or BLUURF. Even if the words are a preposterous song about eating ants for breakfast, or just a list of astonishingly goofy sounds like BLAGGITY BLAGGITY and GLIBBITY GLOBBITY. Cleverly irreverent and irresistibly silly, The Book with No Pictures is one that kids will beg to hear again and again. (And parents will be happy to oblige.)

Download or read book Mr S written by George Jacobs and published by Zondervan. This book was released on 2009-04-25 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Mr. S: My Life with Frank Sinatra, by former valet-aide George Jacobs with an oh-so-able assist by William Stadiem, has at least five quotable and shocking remarks about the famous on every page. The fifteen years Jacobs toiled for Frank produces a classic of its genre -- a gold-star gossip-lover's dream.... "The rest is showbiz history as it was, and only Ava Gardner, Humphrey Bogart, and Betty Bacall are spared. Marilyn Monroe, Judy Garland, Juliet Prowse, Noel Coward, Cole Porter, Mia Farrow, Elvis Presley, Swifty Lazar, Dean Martin, Peggy Lee, Sammy Davis Jr., Marlene Dietrich, Greta Garbo, Jimmy van Heusen, Edie Goetz, Peter Lawford, and all of the Kennedys come in for heaping portions of 'deep dish,' served hot. Sordid, trashy, funny, and so rat-a-tat with its smart inside info and hip instant analysis that some of it seems too good to be true....

Download or read book Earth Warden written by Tony James Slater and published by Ancient Guardians. This book was released on 2018-08-29 with total page 398 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For centuries, the Wardens have guarded our planet. Their sacred duty: to protect humanity from itself

Download or read book Super Farty Pants written by Paul Wennersberg-Løvholen and published by . This book was released on 2019-11-12 with total page 36 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Is it a bird? Is it a plane? And what's that smell? Amelia is just a regular kid. That is until a chance encounter with a strange looking bug that grants her super powers- super farty powers! A hilarious story full of farting and flying that children of all ages (and their parents) will love! A beautifully illustrated childrens book that is both perfect for reading to your little ones, but also great for those that can read themselves.

Download or read book God Touched written by John Conroe and published by Lulu.com. This book was released on 2010-04-16 with total page 340 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Chris Gordon is a rookie cop in the Big Apple with an interesting sideline - hunting demons.But after rescuing a beautiful girl from a demonic attack, he finds life stranger than he ever thought possible. Vampires, werewolves, shadowy federal agencies and a giant short-faced bear. And it's not even Halloween yet.

Download or read book Can I Kiss Her Yet written by Tony James Slater and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2015-05-29 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Tony James Slater is back! This time he's got only one thing on his mind: Getting married. According to Bill Shakespeare, the path of true love never did run smooth... And this is Tony; NOTHING ever runs smoothly for him. So the path of true love is about to beat him around the head with a snow shovel. It started so well - with a proposal that left bite marks, and Tony selling his body to medical science in exchange for the wedding budget. But there were bound to be hiccups. Like his fiancé not being allowed into the country... Join in the hilarious antics, as Tony and his bride-to-be fend off randy camels, rapacious rodents, and gigantic cardboard underpants - whilst traveling to Spain, the Middle East, and all over England. This is a story of life, death, love, marriage, and everything in between. It's also the story of how not to plan a wedding. And don't get me started on the honeymoon! 'Can I Kiss Her Yet?' is the latest book following Tony's ridiculous exploits. It can be read just as easily on its own, or as part of a series starting with 'That Bear Ate My Pants!'

Download or read book Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing written by Judy Blume and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2011-12-01 with total page 165 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Living with his little brother, Fudge, makes Peter Hatcher feel like a fourth grade nothing. Whether Fudge is throwing a temper tantrum in a shoe store, smearing smashed potatoes on walls at Hamburger Heaven, or scribbling all over Peter's homework, he's never far from trouble. He's a two-year-old terror who gets away with everything—and Peter's had enough. When Fudge walks off with Dribble, Peter's pet turtle, it's the last straw. Peter has put up with Fudge too long. How can he get his parents to pay attention to him for a change?

Download or read book Hyperbole and a Half written by Allie Brosh and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-10-29 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!