Download or read book Read This Book and Never Fart Again written by Tim Miller and published by HarperCollins Australia. This book was released on 2021-11-01 with total page 52 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's been almost a decade since the Fart Monster first entered the world, now he's back in this hilarious new book from bestselling creators Tim Miller and Matt Stanton When you've got a problem, who do you call? The fart monster has spent years releasing a barrage of bottom bazookas onto the world. Now, in a surprising twist, he's here to help put an end to those roars from the rear! Follow along at home as the fart monster leads us through his DIY guide to easing the common fart.

Download or read book Fart Proudly written by Benjamin Franklin and published by Frog Books. This book was released on 2003-03-31 with total page 136 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet Benjamin Franklin as you’ve never met him before . . . This hilarious collection includes the Founding Father’s satirical writings on farting, adultery, and other irreverent subjects you won’t find in your history books. A mention of flatulence might conjure up images of bratty high school boys or lowbrow comics. But one of the most eloquent—and least expected—commentators on the subject is Benjamin Franklin. The writings in Fart Proudly reveal the rogue who lived peaceably within the philosopher and statesman. Included are “The Letter to a Royal Academy”; “On Choosing a Mistress”; “Rules on Making Oneself Disagreeable”; and other jibes. Franklin’s irrepressible wit found an outlet in perpetrating hoaxes, attacking marriage and other sacred cows, and skewering the English Parliament. Reminding us of the humorous, irreverent side of this American icon, these essays endure as both hilarious satire and a timely reminder of the importance of a free press.

Download or read book Figuring Shit Out written by Amy Biancolli and published by Behler Publications, LLC. This book was released on 2014-09-29 with total page 210 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Your life isn't over." My dad says this. "I mean, YOUR life isn't over. Beyond the kids. You'll go on living, doing things. This isn't it." I know, I assure him. I have the kids. They need me. They're my life now. "OK," he replies, then grunts—more of a brief hum. He only hums when he thinks I'm full of shit. Shockingly single. Amy Biancolli's life went off script more dramatically than most after her husband of twenty years jumped off the roof of a parking garage. Left with three children, a three-story house, and a pile of knotty psychological complications, Amy realizes the flooding dishwasher, dead car battery, rapidly growing lawn, basement sump pump, and broken doorknob aren't going to fix themselves. She also realizes that "figuring shit out" means accepting the horrors that came her way, rolling with them, slogging through them, helping others through theirs, and working her way through life with love and laughter. Amy Biancolli is an author and journalist whose column appears in the Albany Times Union. Before that, Amy served as film critic for the Houston Chronicle where her reviews, published around the country, won her the 2007 Comment and Criticism Award from the Texas Associated Press Managing Editors Association. Biancolli is the author of House of Holy Fools: A Family Portrait in Six Cracked Parts, which earned her Albany Author of the Year. Amy lives in Albany, New York, with her three children.

Download or read book Never Trust a Fart written by Jason Herbert and published by . This book was released on 2019-08-19 with total page 86 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Like a hard hitting investigative reporter, I asked the tough questions and got down to the truth! Grown men throughout the world regularly poop their pants. Here are their stories.

Download or read book Old MacDonald Heard a Fart written by Derek Landy and published by HarperCollins Children's Books. This book was released on 2017-04-06 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Old Macdonald heard a fart ... E-I-E-I-O!" There are some VERY rude noises coming from Old Macdonald's farm - who could be responsible?! Sing along to this side-splitting picture book adaptation of everyone's favourite nursery rhyme.

Download or read book The Table Sets Itself written by Ben Clanton and published by Bloomsbury Publishing USA. This book was released on 2014-01-21 with total page 34 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Izzy is thrilled to finally help set the table, learning all the proper places for her friends Fork, Spoon, Dish, Napkin, Cup, and Knife. But once they get into a nightly groove, Izzy and her friends grow tired of their same old spots. Shaking things up doesn't go over so well with Mom and Dad, so Spoon and Dish run off for an adventure of their own. Lonely without her favorite tablemates, Izzy will need to find a way to convince Spoon and Dish to come back to the table. Perfect for any kid who has ever resisted a daily task, this clever, pun-filled story is gentle reminder that every dish has its place, and that injecting some creativity into daily tasks can make even the dullest ones lots of fun.

Download or read book No One Likes a Fart written by Zoe Foster Blake and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2020-01-14 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Fart is desperate to make friends and have fun. But no one likes a fart -- not even a fart with a heart. With plenty of laughs and even more heart, this delightful picture book shows that even the smelliest among us can find a friend in this world. It's hard out there for a fart. Too smelly. Too embarassing. Too gross. Striking the perfect balance of gross-out humor, wit, and heart, this beautifully illustrated picture book delivers a message of accepting yourself and finding a friend who loves you just the way you are.

Download or read book There is a Monster Under My Bed Who Farts Fart Monster and Fri written by Tim Miller and published by HarperCollins Australia. This book was released on 2012-11-01 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the mega-bestselling creators of Fart Monster and Friends comes your favourite characters, now in paperback! There is a monster under my bed who farts. You don't want to use the bathroom after him... Everyone says, 'It wasn't me!' But what if it REALLY wasn't you? What if it was the monster who lives under your bed? How much trouble can one little monster cause... Written and illustrated by superstar duo, Tim Miller and Matt Stanton, this book will have you rolling all over the floor laughing. PRAISE 'With There is a Monster Under My Bed Who Farts, the two men have come up with an instant classic. It's funny, it's beautifully illustrated and it's ever so naughty. I loved it. Now it's time to share it with my daughter!' - Rob Minshull, ABC Radio Brisbane 'If the word fart offends you, don't buy this book by these Aussie blokes because you'll be encouraging your preschooler to embrace their gastric shortcomings. The super-cute illustrations will even make puritans smile' - Herald Sun 'Tickle your toddler's funny bone with this irreverent story' - Mother and Baby 'Tim Miller's text comprises simple statements about where and how the farting takes place, leaving plenty of narrative room for Matt Stanton's cartoon-style illustrations. Using simple shapes, bulging-eyed characters and dynamic compositions, he engagingly captures the personalities of the little boy, the monster and the farts. This book will provoke disgust and hilarity in equal measure, but there is no doubt that it will definitely appeal to the legion of littlies who are fascinated with "impolite" bodily functions' - Canberra Times 'The title says it all, and this jovial book will delight the under fours' - Weekend Australian

Download or read book My Dad Loves to Toot written by Tootin' Tom and published by . This book was released on 2021-05-17 with total page 38 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New 2021 Father's Day Gift Idea For Dad AND the Kids! Is your Dad the family's number 1 farter? Looking for something that Dad can read with his kids? Want a children's story book that will have everyone smiling and laughing till the end? Introducing My Dad Loves to Toot by Tootin' Tom! Follow Dad's hilarious farting story where sometimes his love of tooting does more harm than good. But maybe there is a clever way that he can use it to his advantage? Why Choose My Dad Loves to Toot? Bonding Experience Reading together is one of the best ways for dads and their kids to build stronger bonds and share special moments Professional Illustrations Fully colored custom illustrations that immerse you in the story by bringing every character and scene to life. Great Gift Idea: When it comes to an easy and quick, yet creative gift idea for Dad or the kids, there is no matching a story book that they can experience together. Need More Reasons? ✅ Premium gloss cover with fully colored interior pages. ✅ Ideal for all ages that like silly farting humor - nothing overly gross. ✅ Age-appropriate illustrations - to be enjoyed by both adults and young children. ✅ Hilarious farting situations that are sure to have the kids (and adults!) giggling with laughter. So What Are You Waiting For? Click "Add To Cart" NOW & Get This New Release In Time For Father's Day!

Download or read book Almost Everybody Farts written by Marty Kelley and published by Union Square & Co.. This book was released on 2020-02-28 with total page 31 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Grandmas fart. Teachers fart. Terrifying creatures fart. But . . . is there someone who DOESN’T fart? With sly humor, this fun picture book looks at a subject that’s sure to make children laugh: farting. With silent farts, farts like horns, and rainbow farts from unicorns, Almost Everybody Farts comically captures the gassy scene. And only one person insists she’s fart-free: MOM! But is she? Kids will insist on reading this rhyming story again and again. “A playful, punchy paean to the pervasive poot.” —Kirkus Reviews (Starred review)

Download or read book Felix the Farting Elf written by Erik Anderson and published by . This book was released on 2020-12-06 with total page 38 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Are you seeking a "tootastic" stocking stuffer, silly bedtime story, fun classroom read aloud, or clever brain break with comic relief and nonstop giggles? Meet Felix, a hilarious elf with a "gut wrenching" problem: he's "lack toast" intolerant! Plus, it's a "SMELLY" good time, written in rhyme, illustrated with holiday swag, and stuffed with kid-friendly humor to make you bell laugh or snort: "Remember Felix when you're feeling bloated. He had a secret talent but never gloated! Embrace your gifts and share with others: family, friends, neighbors, elves, sisters, and brothers!" Grab this bum-busting funny children's book about farts and toots because it's better than Rudolph's root beer or Grandma Gertie's eggnog! Hang it under the tree or menorah as a zany holiday gift or year-round literary celebration of puns, jokes, themes of, friendship, team work, tolerance, and gas galore!

Download or read book The Fantastic Flatulent Fart Brothers Second Big Book of Farty Facts written by M.D. Whalen and published by . This book was released on 2018-03-28 with total page 142 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Did you know that plants fart? Kids go to jail for farting? That there's a movie award for Best Fart? Do you secretly think farts are not only funny, but fascinating? Increase your Fart IQ and impress your friends and teachers with this gas-powered, illustrated fact-filled follow-up to the best-selling original Big Book of Farty Facts.

Download or read book A Gentle Madness written by Nicholas A. Basbanes and published by . This book was released on 2012 with total page 635 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A Gentle Madness continues to astound and delight readers about the passion and expense a collector is willing to make in pursuit of the book. The book captures that last moment in time when collectors pursued their passions in dusty bookshops and street stalls, high stakes auctions, and the subterfuge worthy of a true bibliomaniac. An adventure among the afflicted, A Gentle Madness is vividly anecdotal and thoroughly researched. Nicholas Basbanes brings an investigative reporter's heart to illuminate collectors past and present in their pursuit of bibliomania. A New York Times Notable Book of the Year.

Download or read book Dad And Me Setting Farts Free written by Jane Bexley and published by Independently Published. This book was released on 2021-04-28 with total page 40 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New Father's Day Gift For 2021! Does your dad fart? Of course he does! This silly rhyming story will have you bursting with laughter as the little bear tries to be just like his dad in every way, including his amazing toot power. This book is appropriate for ALL AGES who don't mind silly toot humor (that is not overly gross). Words used include: toot, fart, gas, rump, booty and bum. Grab this new release in time for Father's Day! 8.5" x 8.5" Premium glossy cover Hilarious (and familiar) fart situations around the house Full color, professional illustrations An easy quick gift for dad from the kids (and kids at heart)

Download or read book No One Is Talking About This written by Patricia Lockwood and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2021-02-16 with total page 224 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: FINALIST FOR THE 2021 BOOKER PRIZE & A NEW YORK TIMES TOP 10 BOOK OF 2021 WINNER OF THE DYLAN THOMAS PRIZE “A book that reads like a prose poem, at once sublime, profane, intimate, philosophical, witty and, eventually, deeply moving.” —New York Times Book Review, Editors’ Choice “Wow. I can’t remember the last time I laughed so much reading a book. What an inventive and startling writer…I’m so glad I read this. I really think this book is remarkable.” —David Sedaris From "a formidably gifted writer" (The New York Times Book Review), a book that asks: Is there life after the internet? As this urgent, genre-defying book opens, a woman who has recently been elevated to prominence for her social media posts travels around the world to meet her adoring fans. She is overwhelmed by navigating the new language and etiquette of what she terms "the portal," where she grapples with an unshakable conviction that a vast chorus of voices is now dictating her thoughts. When existential threats--from climate change and economic precariousness to the rise of an unnamed dictator and an epidemic of loneliness--begin to loom, she posts her way deeper into the portal's void. An avalanche of images, details, and references accumulate to form a landscape that is post-sense, post-irony, post-everything. "Are we in hell?" the people of the portal ask themselves. "Are we all just going to keep doing this until we die?" Suddenly, two texts from her mother pierce the fray: "Something has gone wrong," and "How soon can you get here?" As real life and its stakes collide with the increasingly absurd antics of the portal, the woman confronts a world that seems to contain both an abundance of proof that there is goodness, empathy, and justice in the universe, and a deluge of evidence to the contrary. Fragmentary and omniscient, incisive and sincere, No One Is Talking About This is at once a love letter to the endless scroll and a profound, modern meditation on love, language, and human connection from a singular voice in American literature.

Download or read book Here s Another Damn Book That No One Will Read written by jason Johnson and published by Author House. This book was released on 2011-02-08 with total page 222 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Yes, it's another damn book by political humorist Jason Johnson, who again tickles the funny bone while he punches the kidneys. Read his new collection of damn essays, including, "I Hate Sarah Palin and So Does Jesus," "Rape Isn't Always Funny," "Political Moderates Can Suck It," and the heart-warming "I Like It When Hunters Shoot Each Other," plus many more. It's a damned wild ride for anyone who bothers to read the damn thing.

Download or read book Fritz the Farting Reindeer Saves Christmas written by Humor Heals Us and published by Farting Adventures. This book was released on 2020-11-27 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Fritz doesn't know it, but he's a big part of saving Christmas this year. Rudolph's red nose has stopped shining. Now, Santa has no light to guide him. How will he find his way to the children's homes? A children's beloved classic, this story will have kids rolling on the floor with laughter. Adults are permitted to laugh too. Perfect for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or anytime of the year! Vote on new title names and receive freebies at humorhealsus.com