Download or read book Princesses Don t Parp written by Peter Bently and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-08-08 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Princess is getting ready for her ball at the palace of Par Ping. She's starting to feel nervous. What happens if she pumps or parps or does bum-blasts or toots, bottom-burps, whizpops or poots? That shouldn't be a problem though, as everyone knows princesses don't pump... A new laugh-out-loud new text from Peter Bently, author of Meet the Parents and Dustbin Dad.
Download or read book Princesses Don t Fart written by Peter Bently and published by Simon & Schuster Children's UK. This book was released on 2020-09-22 with total page 30 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Princess is getting ready for her ball at the palace of Pum Ping. She's starting to feel nervous. What happens if she pumps or parps or does bum-blasts or toots, bottom-burps, whizpops or poots? That shouldn't be a problem though, as everyone knows princesses don't fart... A new laugh-out-loud new text from Peter Bently, author of Meet the Parents and Dustbin Dad.
Download or read book Hyperbole and a Half written by Allie Brosh and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-10-29 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!
Download or read book Practical Handbook of Bee Culture written by Sherlock Holmes and published by Andrews UK Limited. This book was released on 2017-07-21 with total page 268 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In the summer of 2016 retired broadcaster Paul Ashton made an astounding discovery at a car boot sale in Sussex. He found a copy of Sherlock Holmes's Practical Handbook of Bee Culture, and bought it for £2. No other copy of this legendary volume – the only book Holmes wrote – has ever come to light. The Handbook is the journal kept by Holmes from 1904 to 1912. 1904 was the year he retired from active investigation and moved to a farmhouse in East Dean. In 1912 he came out of retirement and left East Dean in order to outwit the German spy network in Britain on the eve of World War I. The journal is, of course, principally the record of his bee-keeping activities, but Holmes has also included a wealth of astonishing information – some of it highly indiscreet – about the following: – his marriage to Mrs Hudson – their social life in Sussex – his meetings with Lenin, Pablo Picasso, Edward VII, Rudyard Kipling, George Bernard Shaw and Sigmund Freud, among other distinguished figures – two investigations that he carried out, even though officially retired – two attempts that were made on his life – his involvement in the Jack the Ripper murders, the Dr Crippen affair, the theft of the Mona Lisa, and the Siege of Sidney Street – his correspondence with some of the famous scientists of the day – his active support of the Suffragette movement – the regular updating of his casebooks of famous criminals of the nineteenth century – a number of photographs, some taken by him and four actually showing him – the steady deterioration of his health over the period. Both the owner of the Handbook and the publisher are honoured to be able to make this unique treasure available to the general public.
Download or read book Dustbin Dad written by Peter Bently and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-06-06 with total page 34 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Do you leave food on your plate at mealtimes? If you do, beware, it could lead to all sorts of trouble . . . The dad in this book has a penchant for leftover food - even the bits that are soggy and chewed! He eats EVERYTHING - unfinished sandwiches, cold soggy fries, unwanted broccoli, half eaten pies! But when, one day, he accidentally guzzles the cat's Puss-Pep-Up Powder, strange things start to happen . . .
Download or read book The Yoga Ogre written by Peter Bently and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2012-06-07 with total page 34 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Ogden the Ogre was worried one night. His jim-jams had grown far too short and too tight. The people said, "Jim-jams too tight and too short? Overweight ogres should take up a sport." But finding the perfect sport for a big, bumbling ogre isn't that easy, as everyone soon finds out! Another infectiously funny picture book from the winner of the Roald Dahl Funny Prize 2011.
Download or read book Meet the Parents written by Peter Bently and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-05-06 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Yes, parents are bossyNbut they also have their perks. Readers can discover the best of them in this lively picture book from two Roald Dahl Funny Prize favorites! Full color.
Download or read book Oxford Exam Excellence written by and published by OUP Oxford. This book was released on 2006-11-30 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: All key exam topics and vocabulary covered. Practice of all main test task types in Reading, Listening, Use of English, Writing, and Speaking. Exam techniques, preparation strategies, and useful study tips. Multi-ROM containing recorded material for the Listening tasks and tapescripts. Word Bank with key vocabulary, Speaking Bank with useful communicative phrases, and Writing Bank with model texts and advice. Smart answer key that explains why an answer is correct.
Download or read book Armenian Folk tales and Fables written by Charles Downing and published by Oxford University Press, USA. This book was released on 1993 with total page 248 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: These folk-tales were told by simple people--vine-dressers, farm-laborers, millers--and were preserved by word of mouth, to be repeated for entertainment in the coffee-house, or at home during the long, hard winters. There are fables here, too, selected from the collections of medieval scholars and philosophers, while the expressive and often humorous proverbs show the ways of the world through shrewd Armenian eyes.
Download or read book How to be a Woman written by Caitlin Moran and published by Random House. This book was released on 2012 with total page 322 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 1913: Suffragette throws herself under the King's horse. 1969 u Feminists storm Miss World. NOW u Caitlin Moran rewrites The Female Eunuch from a bar stool and demands to know why pants are getting smaller. There's never been a better time to be a woman: we have the vote and the Pill, and we haven't been burnt as witches since 1727.
Download or read book Anita and Me written by Meera Syal and published by HarperCollins UK. This book was released on 2012-11-01 with total page 364 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Nine-year-old Meena can’t wait to grow up and break free from her parents. But, as the daughter of the only Punjabi family in the mining village of Tollington, her struggle for independence is different from most.
Download or read book Roger s Profanisaurus written by Viz and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2010 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the playground to the boardroom, this lexicon of bad language makes, arguably, a more important contribution to the everyday vocabulary of the British Isles than the Oxford dictionary. Now, with over 10,000 entries, this edition features the latest in expletives, sexual obscenities and lavatorial euphemisms.
Download or read book Octopus Shocktopus written by Peter Bently and published by Candlewick Press. This book was released on 2022-08-23 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Charmingly silly...features bouncy, rhyming text that will enchant readers." —Kirkus Reviews An octopus falls from the sky one day. It lands on a roof and there it stays. The village’s children quickly make friends with it, even though the adults are wary. But the octopus proves very handy indeed, making a perfect slide, helping out with some painting, and even rescuing a cat stuck in a tree. But just when all the neighbors decide they want an octopus of their very own, it disappears. Where has it gone and will it come back?
Download or read book The Great Sheep Shenanigans written by Peter Bently and published by Andersen Press USA. This book was released on 2014-01-01 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "A lamb for my supper will taste mighty fine!" thought a wily old wolf by the name of Lou Pine. Poor Lou! In this fractured fairy tale, the wolf is stopped at the hedge by the flock's protector, Rambo the Ram. So Lou sets off to find a disguise that will let him sneak into the flock. He tries a fuzzy bathrobe, paint, and even cotton candy, but nothing works out. Can he scare Red Riding Hood's grandmother into knitting him a costume? Or will she—like everyone else—be able to thwart the wolf's plans?
Download or read book Mr Ferris and His Wheel written by Kathryn Gibbs Davis and published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. This book was released on 2014 with total page 45 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Examines how the engineer George Ferris invented and constructed the amusement park ride that bears his name for the 1893 Chicago World's Fair.
Download or read book Cats Ahoy written by Peter Bently and published by Pan Macmillan. This book was released on 2011-12-16 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A hilarious, rhyming adventure about a band of pirate cats! From Peter Bently and Jim Field – illustrator of the bestselling Oi Frog books. Winner of the Roald Dahl Funny Prize! Off shot Alfonso as swift as an arrow, through alleys and gardens and streets dark and narrow. He told every cat to prepare for a treat: "Follow me and you'll get all the fish you can eat!" When Alfonso the cat hears there's a boat coming into harbour stuffed with tasty haddock, he hatches a plan. It's brave! It's bold! And it involves a ghost pirate ship, some rather gullible fishermen and cats... LOTS of cats. With a bouncy, rhyming story and illustrations from the bestselling Jim Field - perfect for reading aloud!
Download or read book King Jack and the Dragon written by Peter Bently and published by Penguin UK. This book was released on 2012-07-26 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Night is falling, bedtime is looming and playtime is nearly over . . . but brave King Jack is more than a match for dragons and terrible beasties. This magical make-believe adventure, illustrated by picture book star Helen Oxenbury, is the perfect bedtime tale for little boys and brave children everywhere.
