Download or read book Oh Crap I Think I Shat Myself written by True Stories Told by Jay Bouchard and published by . This book was released on 2007-05-01 with total page 56 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Years of the frustrating inability to control intestinal urges because of a recently discovered food allergy have put me in some embarrassing and unusual predicaments. There have been times when I have or nearly have had accidents in my pants. I have been forced to use nature and any form of a working plumbing system, regardless of condition, location or cleanliness. After many years of sharing these stories, a friend of mine inspired me to write and publish them as he thought others would enjoy them as much as he did. These are true stories and they have not been embellished. Some people, although their names are not mentioned in this book, were not aware of the circumstances that had transpired. I have compiled the best stories, from grade school to adulthood, that have been told over the years. Many of you like me may have been in these types of situations before, but have never told...until now. In one of the stories, an incident occurred while traveling to an exposition in Massachusetts that my wife and I frequent every year. The year after the incident, we saw the t-shirt, the one I am wearing on the cover of this book, at the Vermont Flannel store and I had to have it. It stands for Protest Outrageous Oil Profits. If you are interested in ordering the t-shirt, please visit www.poopdood.com.
Download or read book Oh Crap Potty Training written by Jamie Glowacki and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2015-06-16 with total page 167 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From potty-training expert and social worker Jamie Glowacki, who’s already helped over half a million families successfully toilet train their preschoolers, comes a newly revised and updated guide that’s “straight-up, parent-tested, and funny to boot” (Amber Dusick, author of Parenting: Illustrated with Crappy Pictures). Worried about potty training? Let Jamie Glowacki, potty-training expert, show you how it’s done. Her six-step, proven process to get your toddler out of diapers and onto the toilet has already worked for tens of thousands of kids and their parents. Here’s the good news: your child is probably ready to be potty trained EARLIER than you think (ideally, between 20–30 months), and it can be done FASTER than you expect (most kids get the basics in a few days—but Jamie’s got you covered even if it takes a little longer). If you’ve ever said to yourself: -How do I know if my kid is ready? -Why won’t my child poop in the potty? -How do I avoid “potty power struggles”? -How can I get their daycare provider on board? -My kid was doing so well—why is he regressing? -And what about nighttime?! Oh Crap! Potty Training can solve all of these (and other) common issues. This isn’t theory, you’re not bribing with candy, and there are no gimmicks. This is real-world, from-the-trenches potty training information—all the questions and all the answers you need to do it once and be done with diapers for good.
Download or read book Oh Crap I Have a Toddler written by Jamie Glowacki and published by Gallery Books. This book was released on 2019-06-04 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Real-world, from-the-trenches toddler parenting advice from the author of the bestselling Oh Crap! Potty Training. Toddlers—commonly defined as children aged between two and five years old—can be a horribly misunderstood bunch. What most parents view as bad behavior is in fact just curious behavior. Toddlerdom is the age of individuation, seeking control, and above all, learning how the world works. But this misunderstanding between parents and child can lead to power struggles, tantrums, and even diminished growth and creativity. The recent push of early intellectualism coupled with a desire to “make childhood magical” has created a strange paradox—we have three-year-olds with math and Mandarin tutors who don’t know how to dress themselves and are sitting in their own poop. We are pushing the toddler mind beyond its limit but simultaneously keeping them far below their own natural capabilities. In the frank, funny, and totally authentic Oh Crap! I Have a Toddler, social worker Jamie Glowacki helps parents work through what she considers the five essential components of raising toddlers: —Engaging the toddler mind —Working with the toddler body —Understanding and dealing with the toddler behavior —Creating a good toddler environment —You, the parent Oh Crap! I Have a Toddler is about doing more with less—and bringing real childhood back from the brink of over-scheduled, over-stimulated, helicopter parenting. With her signature down-and-dirty, friend-to-friend advice, Jamie is here to help you experience the joy of parenting again and giving your child—and yourself—the freedom to let them grow at their own pace and become who they are.
Download or read book Figuring Shit Out written by Amy Biancolli and published by Behler Publications, LLC. This book was released on 2014-09-29 with total page 210 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Your life isn't over." My dad says this. "I mean, YOUR life isn't over. Beyond the kids. You'll go on living, doing things. This isn't it." I know, I assure him. I have the kids. They need me. They're my life now. "OK," he replies, then grunts—more of a brief hum. He only hums when he thinks I'm full of shit. Shockingly single. Amy Biancolli's life went off script more dramatically than most after her husband of twenty years jumped off the roof of a parking garage. Left with three children, a three-story house, and a pile of knotty psychological complications, Amy realizes the flooding dishwasher, dead car battery, rapidly growing lawn, basement sump pump, and broken doorknob aren't going to fix themselves. She also realizes that "figuring shit out" means accepting the horrors that came her way, rolling with them, slogging through them, helping others through theirs, and working her way through life with love and laughter. Amy Biancolli is an author and journalist whose column appears in the Albany Times Union. Before that, Amy served as film critic for the Houston Chronicle where her reviews, published around the country, won her the 2007 Comment and Criticism Award from the Texas Associated Press Managing Editors Association. Biancolli is the author of House of Holy Fools: A Family Portrait in Six Cracked Parts, which earned her Albany Author of the Year. Amy lives in Albany, New York, with her three children.
Download or read book Holy Shit written by Chris Viloria and published by Dorrance Publishing. This book was released on 2020-06-01 with total page 82 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Holy Shit By: Chris Viloria The Speaker decided to take physical form when the stars were in alignment with Gemini. Being a Gemini means his planetary ruler is Mercury, and he will continuously hit you with the right words at the right time due to his ability to relate with any person on ANY level imaginable. The Speaker plans to awaken everyone consciously to the real world we live in, the one that is hidden in plain sight, using only words. The Speaker does not believe in small talk as he will speak with powerful words to build strong foundational relationships. Our world is undergoing a slow, but sure fast-growing consciousness shift. First and foremost, WE as a human race first need to address the problem that humans ARE the problem in order to save this planet. To end the cycle of our B.S, we should be planting healthy and positive seeds deep within the minds of the youth as they will one day be the ones running the show. And the cycle they are currently caught in is leading us all to our deaths. The truth written in this book and the many more to come will be spread throughout the entire world “as far as the blue stretches across in the sky.” Soon, we will all be on the same page when The Speaker has opened everyone's third eye for them in the future. Welcome to The “Dimension.”
Download or read book I Nearly Shit Myself Books 1 4 written by Joe KING and published by Andrew M Molloy. This book was released on with total page 188 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I Nearly Shit Myself #1. Do you believe in ghosts? Bill End doesn't, but as his first night back as a Security Guard, he soon realises they are real, VERY real. Not only are they out to scare him, but they are also out to take his mind, body and soul. Will he make it through the night, with his sanity and soul intact? Or will he become something else! With randy ghost William Moorcock on his back, ANYTHING is possible! I Nearly Shit Myself #2. A chemical leak has led to a strange creature growing in the sewers and is now seeking human flesh to reproduce. When people start to go missing in very unusual circumstances, the case is given to detective Mack McKenzie & his new sidekick Steve. Something weird is happening to the people of the city, and they soon realise they will have to go down the sewers to find out what is killing all of them. Will they find out who, and what, is causing them to disappear? Or will it all just get flushed down the pan! I Nearly Shit Myself #3. When alcoholic scientist Joel discovers a new serum, he soon discovers it not only has the power to make him a monster in bed, but it also has a side effort so horrific, it makes his life a living nightmare! As his drinking gets out of control, so does his life and unknowing to him, he is killing people. With his time running out, will he live long enough to find a way out of this horror story he has created for himself? Or will he just have to accept, the serum he has taken was never going to have a happy ending! I Nearly Shit Myself #4. When Ben and his girlfriend decide to go for a naughty weekend away at a disused reservoir. They should have heeded the warning sign. KEEP OUT. NO SWIMMING. After their weekend is cut short, and they return home, the real horror begins! The, I Nearly Shit Myself, series are now being published under new titles with alternative endings.
Download or read book I Nearly Shit Myself 3 written by Joe KING and published by Andrew M Molloy. This book was released on with total page 78 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I Nearly Shit Myself 3, is a dark tale from Joe KING that will show you how sometimes it is better to stick with what you have, rather than risk it all. With profanity from the beginning, your sense of humour/humor will be pushed to its limits! When alcoholic scientist Joel discovers a new serum, he soon discovers it not only has the power to make him a monster in bed, but it also has a side effort so horrific, it makes his life a living nightmare! As Joel’s drinking gets out of control, so does his life and unknowing to him, he is killing people. With his time running out, will he live long enough to find a way out of this horror story he has created for himself? Or will he just have to accept, the serum he has taken was never going to have a happy ending! I Nearly Shit Myself 3 is now being published as, The PLONKER with an alternative ending.
Download or read book The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F ck written by Mark Manson and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2016-09-13 with total page 197 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 New York Times Bestseller Over 10 million copies sold In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we’ve been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let’s be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn’t sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is—a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let’s-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited—"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault." Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.
Download or read book Self Care for the Real World written by Nadia Narain and published by Random House. This book was released on 2017-12-28 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: _________________ THE TOP TEN BESTSELLER 'Unusually practical, non-patronising and authentic. Think Marie Kondo for the mind' Sunday Times Wellness pioneers Nadia Narain and Katia Narain Phillips have spent decades helping others to feel their best. But it took them a bit longer to learn to care for themselves. Here they share the small, achievable steps they picked up on a lifetime’s journey towards self-care, and how you can apply them to your life, wherever you are. Right now, you may be deep in the waves of life, being tossed around. Learning self-care is like building your own life boat, plank by plank. Once you’ve got your boat, you’ll still be rocked by the same waves, but you’ll have a feeling of safety, and a stability that means you can pick other people up on your way.
Download or read book Elegies for the Brokenhearted written by Christie Hodgen and published by W. W. Norton & Company. This book was released on 2011-07-18 with total page 280 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mary Murphy searches for identity and purpose as she tells the story of her erratic childhood, her runaway sister, and the histories of people with whom she's crossed paths.
Download or read book How Long Is the Present written by David Antin and published by UNM Press. This book was released on 2014-12-01 with total page 407 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Poet, performance artist, and critic David Antin invented the “talk poem.” He insists that his poems be oral and created in front of a live audience, in a specific time and place, with the transcription of the performance adjusted for print by presenting it not in prose but in clumps of words without justified margins or punctuation, peppered with white spaces that indicate pauses. In this book, editor Stephen Fredman provides a critical introduction to a selection of talk poems from three out-of-print collections, accompanied by a new interview with the author. As Fredman points out, Antin’s work is a form of conceptual writing that has influenced generations of experimental poets and prose writers. His profound and humorous talk poems are essential for classroom and scholarly discussions of the arts in modernism and postmodernism—offering as well an invitation to strengthen the ties between the sciences and the humanities.
Download or read book Oh Shit They re Killing People written by Patrick Hayes and published by Patrick Hayes. This book was released on 2023-08-26 with total page 86 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An 80-page anthology of horror, featuring short stories, micro fiction, poetry & song, all in the grand theme of, well, killing people. Delivered in bursts, and a bit interactive too! Be sure to look around and be careful when you’re inside. TABLE OF CONTENTS Entrance Skip Skip Man stabbed and killed in Akron Only Third Threads Knees and Toes Intro & Tongue of The Wicked Goddess 01111000 00001010 Paralytic Dark Mother finds son dead by brother's hand No More Soup Breathless All Eyes on Tragedy Deadly shooting in the Bronx Recipe For a Sloppy Joe
Download or read book I Nearly Shit Myself 1 written by Joe KING and published by Andrew M Molloy. This book was released on 2017-05-15 with total page 94 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A fun story packed with comedy/ horror, humour and a hugely different type of ghost, which will leave you looking down the toilet before you commit yourself, that is if your sense of humour is up to it! Do you believe in ghosts? Bill begins to think differently as his first night shift back as a Security Guard gets off to a bumpy start and he soon realises they are real, VERY real. Not only are they out to scare him, but they are also out to take his mind, body and soul. Will he make it through the night, with his sanity and soul intact? Or will he become something else! With randy ghost William Moorcock on his back, ANYTHING is possible during the Night Shift from hell. This book is now published as… Night Shift. Horror & Hilarity with a Banana Taste! This edition has an alternative ending.
Download or read book Man UNcivilized written by Traver Boehm and published by . This book was released on 2018-08-17 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This is the guidebook for the newly emerging paradigm of masculinity. One that includes and celebrates both the primal and divine aspects of men.
Download or read book Advances in Contemplative Psychotherapy written by Joseph Loizzo and published by Routledge. This book was released on 2017-05-08 with total page 425 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Advances in Contemplative Psychotherapy offers mental health professionals of all disciplines and orientations the most comprehensive and rigorous introduction to the state of the art and science in integrating mindfulness, compassion, and embodiment techniques. It brings together clinicians and thinkers of unprecedented caliber, featuring some of the most eminent pioneers in a rapidly growing field. The array of contributors represents the full spectrum of disciplines whose converging advances are driving today’s promising confluence of psychotherapy with contemplative science. This historic volume expands the dialogue and integration among neuroscience, contemplative psychology, and psychotherapy to include the first full treatment of second- and third-generation contemplative therapies, based on advanced meditation techniques of compassion training and role-modeled embodiment. Advances in Contemplative Psychotherapy offers the most profound and synoptic overview to date of one of the most intriguing and promising fields in psychotherapy today.
Download or read book Shit Adults Never Taught Us written by Natasha Sattler and published by Natasha Sattler. This book was released on 2021-04-16 with total page 281 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A SNAPSHOT REVIEW OF THE THINGS YOU DIDN’T LEARN IN SCHOOL – IN QUICK, HILARIOUS CHAPTERS. Wouldn’t it be awesome if life had a manual? Not for your daily how-tos (like cooking or ironing) but for when the real shit pops up. The money shit we have no idea how to navigate, like negotiating a raise or buying a car. The relationship shit that slaps us in the face as we turn into full-fledged adults, like surviving a gut-wrenching breakup and having the courage to fall in love. The mind fucks that sneak into our brains after puberty like a ninja and set up camps of anxiety, loneliness, and regret. The life shit that somehow was completely ignored throughout more than a decade of schooling, like protecting your privacy online, traveling on any budget, and finding motivation when it seems impossible. We’ve made it this far, but after countless conversations with friends, it became obvious to me that our childhood education had a ton of gaps. Sure, we learned linear equations and got to dissect frogs for some reason, but no one taught us what the difference between an HMO and a PPO was and why it’s important. I took several years of Algebra but not once was a Mutual Funds class offered. That’s where Sh*t Adults Never Taught Us comes in. This book picks up where the adults left off and helps fill in all our insufficient knowledge by going beyond the Google search bar. Disguised as a self-help book, this mini-memoir uses personal experiences, including some epic failures, to guide you through the most perplexing moments in life. Shit Adults Never Taught Us covers a lot of topics: including career strategies, mental health, emotional quandaries, and navigating all of the WTF moments of adulthood.
Download or read book Think written by Trent Kennedy Johnson and published by BASTEI LÜBBE. This book was released on 2019-03-12 with total page 162 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sebastian is a petty criminal, a gambler, and a pompous bragger - but something about his thoughts exerts an irresistible pull on Think. As his probation officer, she shouldn't get personally involved with him. But what could possibly happen? After all, she has him under control and knows his plans - doesn’t she? About the series: Kathy "Think" Lipinski is a brilliant, yet disgraced psychotherapist who has changed careers to become a probation officer. The job is perfect for Think: a ground-breaking and highly controversial technology has made it possible to telepathically monitor the thoughts of convicts on probation. From now on, Think can listen to the thoughts of her "protégés" in her head. But every innovation comes at a price, and soon Think must ask herself whom she can trust - herself included ... Trent Kennedy Johnson is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, California. He most recently wrote the six-book crime series THE BAY for Bastei Entertainment, and is a graduate of Columbia College Chicago.
