Download or read book Merry Fucking Christmas written by Joe Movick and published by . This book was released on 2020-11-19 with total page 130 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Christmas is a time of family, stress, love, wanting, resentment, and occasional violence.It's tradition.Frozen turkeys, drunk in-laws, gifts that bite, Santa breaking and entering, death, infidelity?Six short comedies to help you wind down during the holidays.

Download or read book Denis Leary s Merry F in Christmas written by Denis Leary and published by Running Press Adult. This book was released on 2012-10-30 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For everyone who loves the holidays - and those of us who can't wait until they're over - Denis Leary has a special gift this season: Merry F***in' Christmas. This adult parody of a children's book, in the vein of Go The Fuck To Sleep, takes aim at bad presents, drunk Santas, boring relatives, ugly sweaters, greedy kids and all the other things that make December such a pain in the ass. Just like he did in The Ref - the cult classic Christmas film that skewers dysfunctional families - Denis will have you laughing out loud about just how unhappy the holidays can be.

Download or read book Hyperbole and a Half written by Allie Brosh and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-10-29 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!

Download or read book The Elf on the Shelf written by Carol V. Aebersold and published by . This book was released on 2012-02-01 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Elf on the Shelf: A Christmas Tradition is an activity the entire family will enjoy. Based on the tradition Carol Aebersold began with her family in the 1970s, this cleverly rhymed children's book explains that Santa knows who is naughty and/or nice because he sends a scout elf to every home. During the holiday season, the elf watches children by day and reports to Santa each night. When children awake, the elf has returned from the North Pole and can be found hiding in a different location. This activity allows The Elf on the Shelf to become a delightful hide-and-seek game.

Download or read book Blood Curse written by William Blackwell and published by William Blackwell Publishing. This book was released on 2017-01-30 with total page 263 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Recently relocated to Prince Edward Island, MacKenzie Adamson is starting to feel the isolation of country living. Starving for affection, companionship and love, the depression demons begin to sink their teeth into his already damaged psyche. He becomes obsessed with a beautiful woman half his age who works as a cashier at a local gas station. Only problem is, Ophelia Sallis won't give him the time of day. Desperate to find friends and female companionship, Mac seeks the aid of Voodoo witch Magdeline Ortega who casts a love spell to unite the two. Initially it works like a miracle, but before long, Mac begins blacking out and sleeping with multiple women, even touching some inappropriately in public. None of it he remembers. Magdeline informs him something has gone terribly wrong with the spell and the only way to reverse it is to participate in a strange and mysterious ritual in the Dominican Republic. On the Caribbean island, the alcohol-induced lasciviousness worsens as Mac teams up with his motley crew of morally compromised, partying, and womanizing friends. To make matters worse, he's unable to track down Magdeline. He realizes a jilted ex-girlfriend has become bent on his destruction and powerful evil Voodoo spirits are using him as a pawn in a violent tug of war to gain control of the spirit world. Spiraling down a reckless black abyss of debauchery, Mac struggles to free himself from the dangerous natural and supernatural forces hell-bent on his demise, while also struggling to find himself and his sanity.

Download or read book Festive As Fuck a Hilarious Christmas Swear Word Coloring Book written by Cindy Booth and published by . This book was released on 2016-11-10 with total page 58 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Celebrate the holiday season with this hilarious Christmas swear word coloring book for adults, filled with cursing Santas, mean reindeer, sarcastic snowmen, and other holiday-themed illustrations dripping with inappropriate language. With illustrations ranging from simple to complex, this adult coloring book will provide hours of fun and relaxation to help you get through the Christmas season!

Download or read book Molly s Surprise written by Valerie Tripp and published by Amer Girl Pub. This book was released on 1986 with total page 64 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Even though he is away serving in an English hospital during World War II, Molly's father finds a way to make the family Christmas very special.

Download or read book A Life Without Consequences written by Stephen Elliott and published by MacAdam/Cage Publishing. This book was released on 2002-07 with total page 204 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A Life Without Consequences is a semi-biographical novel from emerging author Steve Elliott. His novel traces the fate of Paul, a boy whose mother has died and who runs away from a violent father. The book follows Paul from living on the streets of Chicago to passing through juvinile institutions and a state system that is primarily programmed for failure. There, he meets Tanya and they fall in love but they are young and are separated after a failed attempt to escape the institution. Paul battles through the violent system all the while battling his own rapidly budding adolescence. But as he turns sixteen he starts to come to terms with his own path, not as an adult, but as a scared child. Paul's emotions that we think of as anger are actually the determination to take control of his future. As he starts to overcome the system that has housed him, we see him developing a voice and a future of his own, but one day Tanya reappears in his life and the real decisions have to be made. While the characters are fictional, the do not have to be they are representative of many and we realize the fragility of childhood and the burden on the children who have nowhere else to go.

Download or read book I ll Take My Chances written by Gary Turner and published by FriesenPress. This book was released on 2018-05 with total page 170 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Evil had to be defeated and he had a responsibility to help. Now it was too late to do anything but spend the lives of millions of young men to defeat this new Dark Age. The mountains were witness to Sidney's determination to stand tall against the darkness. "Those mountains have always been there. They can be my memorial if I don't come back." This family story spans five generations through the Indian Wars of the Dakotas and Montana, both world wars and Vietnam. It speaks to the heartbreak war often brings when young men roll the dice to answer the call of duty. The story weaves tales of separation, unrequited love, intense romance and devotion to promises and honour. At it's heart, this is an anti war story that illustrates how family can be devastated by conflict while also speaking to the healing of spirit that passes from one generation to the next.

Download or read book How I Paid for College written by Marc Acito and published by Crown. This book was released on 2004-09-07 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A deliciously funny romp of a novel about one overly theatrical and sexually confused New Jersey teenager’s larcenous quest for his acting school tuition It’s 1983 in Wallingford, New Jersey, a sleepy bedroom community outside of Manhattan. Seventeen-year-old Edward Zanni, a feckless Ferris Bueller–type, is Peter Panning his way through a carefree summer of magic and mischief. The fun comes to a halt, however, when Edward’s father remarries and refuses to pay for Edward to study acting at Juilliard. Edward’s truly in a bind. He’s ineligible for scholarships because his father earns too much. He’s unable to contact his mother because she’s somewhere in Peru trying to commune with Incan spirits. And, as a sure sign he’s destined for a life in the arts, Edward’s incapable of holding down a job. So he turns to his loyal (but immoral) misfit friends to help him steal the tuition money from his father, all the while practicing for his high school performance of Grease. Disguising themselves as nuns and priests, they merrily scheme their way through embezzlement, money laundering, identity theft, forgery, and blackmail. But, along the way, Edward also learns the value of friendship, hard work, and how you’re not really a man until you can beat up your father—metaphorically, that is. How I Paid for College is a farcical coming-of-age story that combines the first-person tone of David Sedaris with the byzantine plot twists of Armistead Maupin. It is a novel for anyone who has ever had a dream or a scheme, and it marks the introduction to an original and audacious talent.

Download or read book Never Finished written by David Goggins and published by Lioncrest Publishing. This book was released on 2022-12-06 with total page 297 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This is not a self-help book. It’s a wake-up call! Can’t Hurt Me, David Goggins’ smash hit memoir, demonstrated how much untapped ability we all have but was merely an introduction to the power of the mind. In Never Finished, Goggins takes you inside his Mental Lab, where he developed the philosophy, psychology, and strategies that enabled him to learn that what he thought was his limit was only his beginning and that the quest for greatness is unending. The stories and lessons in this raw, revealing, unflinching memoir offer the reader a blueprint they can use to climb from the bottom of the barrel into a whole new stratosphere that once seemed unattainable. Whether you feel off-course in life, are looking to maximize your potential or drain your soul to break through your so-called glass ceiling, this is the only book you will ever need.

Download or read book Dufort Dynasty Volume Two Steamy Billionaire Romance Boxset written by Juliette N. Banks and published by Juliette N. Banks. This book was released on 2024-10-18 with total page 774 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet the Dufort brothers. These powerful billionaires will steal your hearts with their banter and cheeky smirks. These darker billionaire romances will appeal to those who like spice, strong storylines, witty dialogue, heart-clenching edge of your seat moments, and delicious happy ever afters. Volume Two contains three full-length steamy billionaire love stories featuring alpha male heroes and sexy, empowered women and *no* cliffhangers. DARK SURRENDER: Logan & Emma (Book 5) RUTHLESS TEMPTATION: Aidan & Lily (Book 6) NAUGHTY FESTIVITIES: Amelia & Jack (Book 7) DARK SURRENDER: When billionaire CEO Logan Dufort visits New York City for his grandmother's funeral, he encounters romance author Emma Edwards — who craves a scorching story of her own. Can Emma handle Logan's dark desires? A red-hot erotic romance! RUTHLESS TEMPTATION: At her best friend's wedding in Hawaii, Lily falls under the spell of the sexy best man, Aidan, a dominant billionaire eager to claim her. But will their steamy weekend affair lead to a passion that lasts? NAUGHTY FESTIVITIES: Are you dreaming of a white-hot Christmas? When powerful Jack Rutherford meets Amelia Dufort, he suddenly knows exactly what he wants to unwrap — and he can't wait to show her that passion is always the best present… A sexy read! Each book has a happy ever after. Absolutely NO cliffhangers. This is a complete series. The final two books, 8 and 9, are available as separate titles to purchase. Keywords: billionaire, ceo, office, alpha strong heroine, vampire romance, soul mates, fated mates, instalove, romance novel, sexy book, sexy romance book, steamy romance novel, friends to lover, mature heroine romance, alpha hero reads, military romance, instant love, romcom, romantic suspense, office romance, holiday romance, New York romance, enemies to lovers, friends to lovers, alpha hero, alphahole, alpha hole, rejected mates, adventure romance, action romance series, military, military heroes, spicy romance, forbidden lovers, billionaire romance, five star romance, hot reads, mistaken mate, possessive heroes, dominant heroes, page-turner romance, sexy uniform, author romance, writer, danger, secret lover, Hawaii romance, tropical romance, romantic love story, passionate romance, sexy villains, mafia, bad boy romance, MC romance, dark romance, billionaire, bad boy, love books, love stories, new adult, holiday, romantic novels, sexually romantic books, guaranteed HEA, no cliffhangers, happily ever after, bestseller, bestselling author If you love these authors, you’ll enjoy this series: Julia Kent, TL Swan, Sierra Rose, Meghan Quinn, Elizabeth O’Roark, Ava Gray, J.T. Geissinger, Ava Harrison, Melanie Harlow, Kat T. Masen, Eva Winners, Marni Mann, Ivy Smoak, Michelle Heard, Lucy Darling, Monica Murphy, Layla Hagen, Pippa Grant, Carly Flynn, K.Bromberg, Lucy Score, Raylin Marks, Lily Gold, Penelope Sky, Bella J, Claire Kingsley, Eva Winners, Colleen Hoover, Louise Bay, Lucy Score, Ana Huang, Sara Cate, Olivia Hayle, Max Monroe, Tia Louise, Laurelin Paige, Carrie Ann Ryan, Lisa Renee Jones, Skye Warren, Willow Winters, K. A. LINDE, Shayla Black, Piper Lawson, Cadence Keys, Lauren Blakely.

Download or read book Luv Alwayz written by Shonell Bacon and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2015-10-06 with total page 316 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Lies, abuse, infidelity, sex, intrigue, international romance—a cornucopia of events play out in the relationships of Luv Alwayz, a novel that intertwines the tales of three couples, brought together by friendship and love. Christopher and Tamara are in a relationship already strained by emotional baggage—will sexual indiscretions ruin them? After years of hiding the pain of abuse through being loose, ghetto sistah extraordinaire Shameika—with the aid of militant yet soulful brotha, Jamal—try to break through her past to finally reach “happily ever after.” When strait-laced, professional Deandra finds out that her sister has been kidnapped, she seeks the aid of playa of the year, Stephan to help in the rescue, but it is Deandra who might need rescuing—from Stephan.

Download or read book Quitters Never Win written by Michael Bisping and published by Random House. This book was released on 2019-07-25 with total page 354 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THE SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER Some people are born to be a certain thing. And I was a born fighter. At the age of eight, Michael Bisping began his training in martial arts. By the time he was 15, he was fighting in his first no holds barred competition. When he turned professional and joined the UFC he was sure about one thing: only a world championship title would do. A British underdog in the greatest fighting championship on earth, he spent the next decade winning some of the championship’s most sensational contests to achieve his dream, becoming the first ever British UFC world champion in 2016. From his boyhood years learning to fight in the gyms of Lancashire to his most shocking clashes in the cage, in Quitters Never Win Bisping tells the raw and unfiltered story behind his legendary career for the first time, including his greatest wins, his fiercest rivals and the harrowing injury that forced him into retirement. As audacious, entertaining and as candid as the man himself, it’s a backstage pass to one of the world’s most extreme sports and an unbridled account of what it really takes to become a champion, from sleeping in his own car to reaching the summit of the world’s fastest growing sport.

Download or read book Eyes in the Dark written by Kevin Robert Aldrich and published by Aldys Books. This book was released on 2023-06-09 with total page 333 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Technology definitely has a dark side Cameron Hauk spent his childhood helping his parents steal things. Banks, jewelry, art, you name it. And he loved every minute of it. When his father died in a random shooting and his mother wound up in jail, he devoted himself to getting her out. Now he’s playing a long con, part of which involves assuming a fake identity to steal a prototype from the most famous tech titan in the world. He planned for every contingency, except the murder of the tech titan himself. Stuck square in the middle of the murder scene, Cameron must figure out who really killed the tech titan, steal the prototype, and escape without the police being any wiser, or he’ll wind up in prison with his mother. If you love a twisting, pulse-pounding mystery, you’ll love “Eyes in the Dark”.

Download or read book LOUD CLEAR written by Luke Marusiak and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2013 with total page 535 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hank Rudzinski always wanted to be a hero. He fi nds Amy, a partner in his quest, and joins the Army. From Pennsylvania to West Germany; from a Georgia Army Post to a Mississippi Air Force Base; from an Infantry Division in Missouri to the deserts of Iraq in 1991 they realize that heroes are made of something different than rank or medals. They also discover that great causes bring out the best but also the very worst of people. This novel pulls aside the curtain to reveal the grandeur and grittiness of such pursuits. It is also a novel of love and hate; highlighting the lifelong permanence of soul searing choices. This book is part of the "Good Fight Series" and overlaps times and characters of Marx & Ford and the upcoming Fear & Hope.

Download or read book Sex Drugs Rock Roll and Nursing written by Raymond Moore and published by Raymond Moore. This book was released on 2024-06-03 with total page 268 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When you read about what I got up to I know you'll probably think I got what I deserved. You're right — I totally agree. Many of you won't like me no doubt and that's ok — I understand, I really do. I'm not all bad, though. I left the Isle of Skye in the early eighties to start my nursing course in Edinburgh and it's fair to say that I embraced the Capital City's temptations with arms wide open. When I moved into a shared flat I met Bill, a musician, and got involved with his band Low Down - you know, helping them out, doing a bit of driving and humping gear - it was great fun. Low Down was truly phenomenal. Man, I totally loved their music. We took drugs, I mean, I took drugs. Nothing heavy like, just recreational and I met a lot of girls who I didn't treat right and I'm not proud of my behaviour — that's the truth. Look, nursing was a female-dominated profession and male nurses were thin on the ground -- the opportunities for getting up to mischief were many. I worked hard and played harder. A lot of stuff I regret now. Especially what I did to Lisa – and others. Anyway it couldn't last, could it? They way I was living – something had to give. And it did.