Download or read book Hermitage Wat and Some Druids written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2015-12-20 with total page 281 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Brother Hermitage is at it again - this time with druids. Is it a murder mystery? Is it a thriller? Is it just something gone horribly wrong? When his nemesis, the Norman conqueror Le Pedvin orders him to Wales, Brother Hermitage knows it is going to go wrong. He's had a prophecy it's going to go wrong. And from his first steps on the road it strides firmly in that direction. Brother Hermitage, Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, weaver in her own right and the fiercest of the lot, are commanded to find one dead Norman in the whole of Wales - as usual under pain of death. Add to that some treasure and a druid curse or two, and we have the recipe for a laugh out loud historical tale like no other. (Apart from the other Chronicles of Brother Hermitage) It's all complicated enough, but when what seems like the whole of the country wants to join in, things get very messy. And then there are the druids, and stone circles, and sacrifices.... "he who has laughter on his side has no need of proof" Theodore Adorno

Download or read book Hermitage Wat and Some Nuns written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2016-06-28 with total page 294 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the world’s best-selling author of comedy historical mysteries comes another largely pointless excursion. Medieval Shrewsbury is surely no place for murder. Not in this charming town would investigative monks wander around bothering people over every little incident. When Brother Hermitage arrives at Shrewsbury in the summer of 1068 something is up. Or rather down. Gilder, the great merchant is dead and Hermitage’s urge to investigate is overwhelming. His companions, Cwen and Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry think this is a very bad idea. So does the whole town Moot. And the sheriff and the rest of the population. And then there are the nuns. Hermitage has never been strong in the face of adversity and an adverse nun is more than he can cope with. A whole order of them is something to be strenuously avoided. But there is always his duty. It’s got him into trouble so many times; why should Shrewsbury be any different? “Like Cadfael meets Clousseau.” “Terry Pratchett does 1066.” “Rampant silliness.”

Download or read book The Heretics of De Ath written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2010-12-12 with total page 253 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Medieval mystery for people who laugh starts here.... England's most famous date 1066: At the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle, during a completely pointless theological debate, there is a mysterious death. Routine business for the average investigative medieval monk. Unfortunately, this isn’t a tale of average monks. Anyone who would put the idiot Brother Simon in charge of a murder investigation is either one chant short of a plainsong or is up to something. When Brother Hermitage, innocent in every way, including bystanding, is lined up for execution, he begins to wonder if something might be going on. Perhaps his new companion Wat, weaver of pornographic tapestry, can figure out what it is. Before it's too late. If you are a lover of the historical detective genre, if you have a deep respect for the worlds created, don’t read this book. It’ll only upset you. Now available in a massive box set with The Garderobe of Death and The Tapestry of Death; for those with a lever-arch Kindle. People have commented on the whole sorry business: 5* Such a good writer, it's a whole new slant on medieval mystery. The truth is out there, sort of! Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. More please as soon as possible, just keep writing... 5* Like Cadfael meets Clouseau. 5* The usual mayhem, confusion, murder and laughs! 5* Always makes me laugh, love these books, love this author. 1* Stupid! Be warned, there are now 31 Chronicles of Brother Hermitage

Download or read book The Garderobe of Death written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2012-01-10 with total page 360 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Medieval mystery the Howard of Warwick way; funny! Now also a book. Available where all good books gather together. England 1067: Henri de Turold, King William's favourite hunting companion has been murdered. How anyone actually did it, given the remarkably personal nature of the fatal wound, is a bit of a mystery. Lord Robert Grosmal, of disordered mind, disordered castle and Henri's host at the time, knows that King William gets very tetchy when his friends are murdered. He sends to the nearby monastery of De'Ath's Dingle for a monk to investigate. Medieval monks are usually good at this sort of thing. Brother Hermitage is a medieval monk but he's not very good at this sort of thing. Motivated by the point of a sword he and his companion Wat the weaver set off to solve the crime. Oh, by the way King William is arriving that night so they better get a move on. Brother Hermitage's second criminal investigation reveals many things. Improvement is not among them. If you are looking for a poignant evocation of the medieval world, an insightful exploration of the characters of the time, buy a different book. Ellis Peters is quite good. After this debacle he even has another go in The Tapestry of Death. Out now on Kindle What has been said of "The Heretics of Death" 'I laughed 'till I cried,' 5* 'medieval hysterical mystery – must read!' 5* 'buy this book. It is cheap and it will make you laugh ' 5* 'I don't think I'm the target audience,' 1* 'Hermitage you're an idiot' Prior Athan of De'ath's Dingle.

Download or read book The Tapestry of Death written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2012-11-01 with total page 356 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Tapestry of Death. More medieval mystery for people who laugh. England 1067: Briston the weaver has been murdered – in a very special way – and it is up to his old friend Wat to avenge his death. Brother Hermitage will naturally support his companion in the quest, but the young monk worries as the number of suspects keeps rising. He's never been good with crowds. When events take a turn for the truly bizarre, Hermitage and Wat find themselves up to their Saxon socks in people who want them dead, people who want one another dead and people who seem to want everyone dead. They must find a missing maiden, placate a giant killer and reveal the awful secret of the Tapestry of Death before matters are resolved. Resolved largely unsatisfactorily, but then that's life. With a monk, tradesmen, priests, Normans and Saxons, The Tapestry of Death should be a solid, traditional medieval who-done-it, but it isn't. Really, it isn't. Authentic and accurate representation of the time? Barely. Historically informative? Certainly not. Hilarious and very silly? Now you're getting warm. Critical analysis of the work of Howard of Warwick: “His writing is crisp, riotously funny, and he weaves a masterful little mystery that will leave you crying for more!” “Like Brother Cadfael visits Discworld.” “I would recommend this to anyone who loves a good story! It is so hard to wait until the new books come out!” Compared to Monty Python, Carry On films, Terry Pratchett ...and Winnie the Pooh! If you're looking for a serious historical mystery with all the usual trappings, look elsewhere. If you're hoping for characters who are knowledgable beyond their time and talk like a history book, prepare to be disappointed. If you're after a tale of a monk hopelessly out of his depth and a weaver who is really rather naughty, this is the book for you.

Download or read book Brother Hermitage s Christmas Gift written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2017-11-30 with total page 120 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In a modest little tale for the season, Brother Hermitage heads for London. William Duke of Normandy is to be crowned King of England on Christmas day 1066 and he expects presents. For reasons beyond reason, the monastery of De'Ath's Dingle is invited to the ceremony and the only ones who can be let out on their own are Brother Hermitage and Wat the Weaver. But it will be a rush to get there. With only 7 days to travel over 100 miles, the pair must cross a frozen and largely lawless country if they are to make it to Westminster alive. And then there's the problem of Wat's attitude towards gifts in principle. He doesn't mind a reasonable exchange but simply giving sounds like a very poor deal. Perhaps the days of the journey will give Brother Hermitage the opportunity to breathe the spirit of the season into his weaving friend. Or perhaps not. Recent reviews for Howard of Warwick continue a theme: 5* "Very funny" 5* "Another demented tale" 5* "Briiiiiliant as always."

Download or read book A Murder for Master Wat written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2018-03-25 with total page 259 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: COMEDY; MEDIEVAL,CRIME. File under Howard of Warwick. (He invented the genre and must be held accountable). When weavers in the 11th century went out to play there was usually trouble. In this case, it's death, which Brother Hermitage, the King's Investigator, always finds very troublesome indeed. Wat the Weaver doesn't want to go to the weavers' Grand Moot in the first place and no one can make him. Except Mistress Cwen, of course. When they get there it all starts so well, but it only takes the blink of a bat's ear for murder to rear its ugly head and stare straight at Hermitage. He's starting to think that being King's Investigator is actually a cause of death in its own right. But this time, the perpetrators seem quite proud of their actions and have a lot more planned. Is this a race to stop a murder, rather than deal with all the mess afterwards? Hermitage certainly hopes so, although, as usual, he'd rather the whole thing just went away. A Grand Moot of weavers should be a time of joy, celebration and camaraderie, not greed, violence and a generous serving of just plain stupidity. Howard of Warwick invented Medieval Crime Comedy and doesn't know any better; 5* Hilarious 5* Laugh out Loud 5* Very silly 1* Silly (apparently "very" is worth 4*)

Download or read book A Murder of Convenience written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2021-06-24 with total page 247 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Medieval Crime Comedy continues unabated as Howard of Warwick refuses to be abated. From the Best-Selling author of this very peculiar genre comes yet more medieval murder with the usual dash of nonsense. This time, there’s murder in the air; and in the bushes, the castles, the highways and byways. And Brother Hermitage is caught in the middle of the lot; as usual. Even though he’s expecting a murder to be dropped in his lap at any moment, the arrival of this one and the manner of its delivery take him completely by surprise. As the tale unravels, a simple murder and an investigation to discover the culprit would be a bit of a relief. But the Normans seem to be at the bottom of this and their intentions are wholly dishonourable. When the church puts its nose in the mix, Wat the Weaver concludes that they are completely out of their depth. But there is a victim, or there might be, and action must be taken. A journey to Nottingham reunites them with some old friends, well, friends-ish, but they seem as confused as everyone else. At least Cwen finds an ally, which gives Wat plenty to worry about. When the weaver gets drunk and comes up with the most ridiculous suggestion for a murder investigation that any of them have ever heard, it’s clear that things have gone downhill very quickly. With very important people showing a great interest in this business, Hermitage has to be very careful with his, “aha”; if he can even come up with one that makes sense. Who did whatever it is that might have been done? Will everyone live happily ever after? Were they living happily to begin with? Read A Murder of Convenience and there’s a small chance you might find out. And then there’s the crime of Mrs Grod’s cooking. Reviews for previous volumes: 5* Brilliant tale of mayhem and murder 5* Genius, funny, endearing and a proper page turner 5* Howard of Warwick never fails to deliver a good laugh

Download or read book A Murder for Brother Hermitage written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2018-09-24 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's more medieval mystery for people who laugh. Number 1 best selling, prize winning Howard of Warwick is back with volume 12 of the Chronicles of Brother Hermitage; "this time it's historical." Norman England is still full of real people; the incompetent, the hopeless and the just plain useless. But what’s this? At the monastery of his friend Abbot Abbo, a young, naive and bookish monk is killed in chapter 1? Surely not? It can’t be. The death of this particular monk sets off a chain of events that’s tangled to say the least. The news must be taken to Derby, home of Wat, erstwhile weaver of pornographic tapestry and Cwen, fierce and independent weaver in her own right. Then the death must be investigated, of course it must, and the guilty held to account. But the guilty seem to be queuing up in this case, and show not the least sign of shame, let alone guilt. In fact, they’re quite proud of what they've done. Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator, made a lot of enemies over the last 11 books. It was bound to go horribly wrong sooner or later. "Horrible" and "wrong" crop up quite often where Brother Hermitage is concerned. But, you need to read the book if you want to make any sense of all this; even then, there are no guarantees. Some people have said "hilarious", some have said "very, very funny," others have said "stupid" (the good and bad kind). Nearly 100,000 people have succumbed to the nonsense that is Howard of Warwick. 1,000 reviews, Amazon number 1s, 5* littering the floor of the scriptorium? There must be something in it. (May require prior reading of course HW101: medieval detection, the Hermitage years)

Download or read book How Many Monks written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2023-08-23 with total page 235 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From Howard of Warwick, top 20 author with 18 No 1 Best Sellers, comes yet more murderous medieval nonsense. 5* Hilarious 5* Like Cadfael meets Clouseau 5* Another hysterical masterpiece. Very good indeed, brilliant. BBC Not content with being King William's investigator of murder, and he is not content with that at all, Brother Hermitage is now having his trouble delivered. The floods of Derby wash up something very specific and there is only one monk for the job. But who would do that to an abbot? And where did he come from? Not only will Hermitage have to discover a killer, he'll also have to find a monastery where there is none. Perhaps some detestable monks will be able to throw light on the situation. Could the Norman obsession with record-keeping turn out to be useful? At least this murder is only a short walk away, and Hermitage, Wat and Cwen traipse through a soggy countryside to discover more about monks and monasteries than the weavers ever wanted to know. The 30th - yes 30th Chronicle of Brother Hermitage continues the theme of a medieval detective monk who really shouldn’t be

Download or read book The Investigator s Apprentice written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2022-02-24 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Howard of Warwick; the best-seller with sole responsibility for the medieval crime comedy genre. “Like Cadfael meets Clouseau” "very good indeed, brilliant," BBC Now contains added history. Brother Hermitage does worry. Even when there hasn’t been a murder, he worries that there probably has. It can’t do any harm to check, surely? Well, of course, it can. Has the King’s Investigator learned nothing from his previous 23 chronicles? No, of course he hasn’t. When word of death is brought from Derby, Hermitage is concerned this may be more than the usual weekly toll. A simple check should suffice, while a more complex and thorough one would be more satisfying. And this turns up quite a list. The Alodie family, who supposedly succumbed to plague; Maynard the Mighty who sweated to death and old Athlot; a ninety-year-old who fell off his roof. Hm, which one sounds a bit odd? And every good tale deserves a meanwhile… Meanwhile, off in the eastern marshes, a lone escapee from the Norman terror seeks Brother Hermitage with murder in mind. But the journey to Derby will be troublesome, including having to travel with a small band of Norman soldiers. But remember, in 1066 not all Normans took those first boats to Hastings. Some stayed behind to guard the territory. Others ensured that the land continued to flourish. Still more were too old or infirm to partake in the great adventure; And then one or two were simply best kept away from anything sharp. And everything is converging on the King’s Investigator. 5* If you've not read any of them then do yourself a favour and start right away… 5* This series, and Howard of Warwick’s books about what ‘really’ happened at Hastings in 1066, are hilarious 5* Such a good writer, it's a whole new slant on medieval mystery. The truth is out there, sort of! 5* History at its most hilarious

Download or read book Murder Most Murderous written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2021-11-24 with total page 257 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From Best-Selling Howard of Warwick stumbles yet more medieval mystery that doesn't know when to stop. Warning: If you like your medieval detectives sombre and serious, this is not the place for you. It is Murder Most Murderous. “Aha” on page 1? This can’t be right. When Brother Hermitage starts the latest investigation by working out who did it, you know that things are bound to be going wrong by page 2; nothing in Hermitage’s life is that easy. And surely, William the Conqueror hasn’t dragged Hermitage, Wat the Weaver and Cwen across the country just to idle away the passing moments? There’s a dead Norman noble to be considered, and quickly because William hasn’t got all day. But what Hugues d’Auffay, owner of the body in question, was up to is a mystery in its own right. His father behaved strangely enough; he fought in the battle near Hastings, conquered the country and then went home again. Why would any self-respecting Norman conqueror do that? Hugues himself had plans but no one is talking. Perhaps the servants can be persuaded to spill the turnips? But they’ve got their own world to organise; entirely to their advantage, and so will need some persuasion. The Saxon servants are keeping a dark secret in a locked trunk, one that the Normans are very keen to get their hands on. Is there a bargain to be made? Is the curse on the d’Auffay family to be believed? Can Brother Hermitage really use questionable methods to get information? And why do people keep dying? All of life is here: tapestries that dare not show their faces; a curse from an old wise-ish woman; a physick who is surprised at the number of dead bodies one investigation can produce. Read the 23rd Chronicle of Brother Hermitage and you’ll wonder why the King’s Investigator still hasn’t got the hang of it. Chronicle No. 22 garnered comment aplenty: 5* Outright Laughter 5* Laughed till my sides ached. (The Funny Book Company cannot accept responsibility for injured sides.) 5* If you're into history, crime thrillers or humour this is the series for you. 5* What fun.

Download or read book Not Another Murder written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2024-06-24 with total page 243 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Not Another Murder. A question? A statement? Or the despairing sigh of a monk convinced that Death's scythe must have caught in his habit? Escape from Gernesey and a return to Derby is on everyone's mind, but events have spotted Brother Hermitage, and they're up to their usual tricks. This time, they've put him in a priory. What could be better? And what could possibly go wrong? The cloistered life has called him back and so all will be well. There will be no murder here, even though he's the King's Investigator. No one will die, ignoring the deaths that seem to follow him around. And anyway, this is only temporary. There won't be time for anything untoward to happen. Brother Hermitage hasn't been reading his own chronicles, has he? While Wat and Cwen try to make the best of things and work out who to bribe to get out of this place, Hermitage doesn't even make it through the first night before the body turns up. How it was done is a complete mystery, never mind why. And there is certainly something odd about this priory and its monks, who don't seem at all concerned that one of them is now dead. But a route off the island quickly opens up before them, and so there might not be time to solve some murder. With any luck, they'll be miles away before long. All they need is some money; considerably more money than they currently have. That priory seemed to have a lot of treasure... Embark on Chronicle number thirty-two, and your mind will be filled with wonder. (Wondering why, mainly.)

Download or read book The Case of The Clerical Cadaver written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2016-10-27 with total page 268 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It’s new, it's medieval and it’s all very silly…. A hidden monastery in the depths of England’s depths? A secret that could rock the church to its core? A trail of clues that can only be interpreted by an expert? This all sounds rather familiar…. Except the expert is Brother Hermitage, so I wouldn’t get your hopes up. Called once more by King William - who doesn’t even know what he’s calling for - Hermitage, Cwen and Wat the weaver set off to deal with the greatest mystery of all. A mystery that has been protected and guarded for years by a secret brotherhood sworn by awful oaths. A mystery only known to a priest who now happens to be dead. A mystery hidden in a monastery that isn’t even supposed to exist. A mystery of such value that the unscrupulous and greedy are also after it, and these particular unscrupulous and greedy know Brother Hermitage very well indeed. Will all be revealed in a satisfactory manner? Will the convoluted trail lead to a revelation of staggering significance? Hardly. This is a Chronicle of Brother Hermitage, after all…. CAUTION: Not for the historically humourless. Howard of Warwick has previous form... “Absolutely hilarious” 5* “I laughed, I had tears running down my face” 5* “Stupid” 1* Need I say more... you have been warned.

Download or read book The King s Investigator Part II written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2020-11-24 with total page 252 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Medieval Crime Comedy is not supposed to be a thing, yet here is book No 20. 100,000 sales and 1000 reviews including things like 5* "hilarious and fun". And now there's more investigation for Brother Hermitage just when you thought he’d given up that sort of thing. The King's Investigator Part II, surprisingly following on from Part I, finds that things have not improved. But this time it’s a missing person and there isn’t a murder at all; well, perhaps just a little one. And this is a Very Important Missing Person who needs urgent investigation, whether Hermitage likes it or not. Following a completely blatant trail that even Hermitage can track, he has to call upon the help of people he'd really rather not call upon at all. He has to go to places he'd rather not go and face consequences better not faced. A chase upriver means a boat - and we all know who that means. And worst of all, there’s the suggestion that someone might be after Wat’s money! Of course, the Normans are making things as difficult as ever but now he has people harassing him from all sides. There are more forces at play than seems decent for one investigation. And who’s this hiding in the woods? Surely not…. Read Part II and rest assured that there is no Part III. People have talked about the King’s Investigator before they even knew it was only Part I. 5* Side-splitting, laugh a minute addition to the series. 5* Please, Howard of Warwick, give us more 5* Wonderful, laughing aloud as I was reading this. 5* Another masterpiece from the quill of Howard of Warwick, gut-bustingly funny from start to finish 5* Another winner from our master of comedic medieval murder mysteries! Unlike most, we also report the lowest rating! 3* I would like a longer story and it felt like this was the end of the series, which made me sad.

Download or read book The King s Investigator written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2020-06-24 with total page 285 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Death in the Tower of London? This could give the place a bad reputation. In King William’s new London fortress (so new it doesn’t have a tower yet), a dead body lies right outside his chamber door. This could be murder as the victim is the widely hated Malf; so widely hated, virtually everyone is suspect. Brother Hermitage, the King’s Investigator must be summoned; the King’s investigator who really doesn’t want to do the job at all anymore. Fortunately, someone else seems very keen to take over: If you thought Brother Hermitage didn’t know what he was doing, Brother Peter is going to be a revelation. But murder seems to be a routine feature of court intrigue: Could it be a result of the dispute between the ghastly Le Pedvin, William’s favourite killer, and Ranulph de Sauveloy, his favourite administrator? Could it be Malf’s own family, who really can’t wait for him to die until they inherit? Could it be the Saxon rebels who are hiding in a very peculiar place close at hand? Brother Hermitage, Wat the Weaver and Cwen have got to find out and as usual, it all goes wrong almost immediately. Find the killer or face the same fate themselves is a familiar old refrain. But perhaps this time, Hermitage sees a way out. Could he really hand his hated job on to someone else; someone who really wants to do it? Populated by old familiar faces from most of Hermitage’s nightmares, The King’s Investigator could be the very end…. ... Although now we learn there's a Part II - how did that happen? - Look for the imaginatively titled, The King's Investigator Part II Howard of Warwick’s mission to bring medieval crime comedy to people who didn’t know they wanted it, takes its nineteenth step. Numerous No 1 Best Sellers, over 100,000 copies out there somewhere and containing more nonsense than a monk’s margin, it looks like it’s here to stay - or is it? Previous volumes have garnered praise: 5* Another brilliant read 5* Another fun filled adventure 5* Ha, ha, ha! Aha! Brother Hermitage does it again. 5* Masterpiece from Howard 1* Silly. "very good indeed, brilliant," BBC Coventry and Warwick

Download or read book The 1066 To Hastings written by Howard of Warwick and published by The Funny Book Company. This book was released on 2020-01-27 with total page 245 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 1066; coming to the seaside near you; whether you like it or not… It’s more hilarity and death from Howard of Warwick, the best selling author who doesn’t know the meaning of “enough is enough”. If ever there was a bad time to be an Anglo Saxon noble in England it was October 14th 1066. Avoiding the Hastings area was also advisable. When Saxon noble Lady Gudmund demands that the murder of her husband be investigated, Brother Hermitage feels obliged to help. When she reports that he headed south with King Harold and hasn’t come back, he thinks this might not take long. But life is never simple for the King’s Investigator, and neither is death. Uncovering things that people have gone to a lot of trouble to cover up in the first place, Brother Hermitage, Wat the Weaver and Cwen embark on an exploration of some of the more deplorable aspects of human nature; along with several pretty deplorable humans. From workshop to manorial hall they chase the most blatantly obvious murder they have ever had to deal with. And if that’s the case, why does it all start going wrong so quickly? It’s a strange murder when the investigator knows perfectly well who did it, but no one will believe him… It’s yet more medieval mystery of-a-sort, and people have spread the word; 5* Hilarious 5* Laugh out loud 1* Stupid