Download or read book Fat Poo s Halloween Zombie Jokes written by Peter Crumpton and published by PeteyRF Creative. This book was released on 2015-10-07 with total page 55 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Fat Poo's Halloween Zombie Jokes

Download or read book Halloween Jokes 4 Kids Part 2 written by Peter Crumpton and published by PeteyRF Creative. This book was released on 2015-09-20 with total page 51 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Halloween Jokes 4 Kids Part 2

Download or read book Out of Salem written by Hal Schrieve and published by Seven Stories Press. This book was released on 2019-03-26 with total page 359 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Longlisted for the 2019 National Book Award for Young People's Literature A Publishers Weekly Best Young Adult Book of 2019 The best Teen Zombie Werewolf Witchy Faerie fantasy murder mystery you've ever read—by debut author, Hal Schrieve. Genderqueer fourteen-year-old Z Chilworth has to adjust quickly to their new status as a zombie after waking from death from a car crash that killed their parents and sisters. Always a talented witch, Z now can barely perform magic and is rapidly decaying. Faced with rejection from their remaining family members and old friends, Z moves in with their mother's friend, Mrs. Dunnigan, and befriends Aysel, a loud would-be-goth classmate who is, like Z, a loner. As Z struggles to find a way to repair the broken magical seal holding their body together, Aysel fears that her classmates will discover her status as an unregistered werewolf. When a local psychiatrist is murdered by what seems to be werewolves, the town of Salem, Oregon, becomes even more hostile to "monsters," and Z and Aysel are driven together in an attempt to survive a place where most people wish that neither of them existed. Rarely has a first-time author created characters of such immediacy and power as Z, Aysel, Tommy (suspected fey) and Elaine (also a werewolf), or a world that parallels our own so clearly and disturbingly.

Download or read book Promise Not to Tell written by Jennifer McMahon and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2009-03-17 with total page 289 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “McMahon unfurls a whirlwind of suspense...Combining murder mystery and coming-of-age tale with supernatural elements, this taut novel is above all a reflection on the haunting power of memory.” –Entertainment Weekly A woman’s past and present collide in terrifying ways in this explosive debut by New York Times bestselling author Jennifer McMahon. Forty-one-year-old school nurse Kate Cypher has returned home to rural Vermont to care for her mother, who's afflicted with Alzheimer's. On the night she arrives, a young girl is murdered—a horrific crime that eerily mirrors another from Kate's childhood. Three decades earlier, her dirt-poor friend Del—shunned and derided by classmates as "Potato Girl"—was brutally slain. Del's killer was never found, while the victim has since achieved immortality in local legends and ghost stories. Now, as this new murder investigation draws Kate irresistibly in, her past and present collide in terrifying, unexpected ways. Because nothing is quite what it seems . . . and the grim specters of her youth are far from forgotten. More than just a murder mystery, Jennifer McMahon's extraordinary debut novel, Promise Not to Tell, is a story of friendship and family, devotion and betrayal—tautly written, deeply insightful, beautifully evocative, and utterly unforgettable.

Download or read book Beautiful Dead written by R. Lee Smith and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2015-11-12 with total page 614 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: SHE WOULD DARE ANYTHING TO SAVE THE WORLD FROM HIS RULE. EVEN HIS BED. He ascended from the darkness years ago-Azrael the Eternal, Azrael the Undying, Azrael Who Is Death-bringing with him the black rains, the fires, the souring of the sky, and the Eaters. Now he rules in the walled city of Haven with his favored Children and his dead court, while all that is left of the living struggles to survive in the ruins of a world that used to be their own. But even as extinction looms, humanity will never surrender to their monstrous conqueror. For Lan, this brutal life has been the only one she's ever known, but she still believes it can change. If the war can never truly end until the Eaters are ended, she will go to Haven, to Azrael himself, and demand he end them. To her surprise, she does not immediately die the hero's death she expected. Instead, Azrael offers her a chance to convince him, and all she has to do is submit herself to the chill embrace of the lord of the Land of the Beautiful Dead. From the author of The Scholomance and The Last Hour of Gann comes a new vision of erotic horror! This book contains explicit sex and gore and is intended for mature readers only.

Download or read book The Things They Carried written by Tim O'Brien and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2009-10-13 with total page 259 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A classic work of American literature that has not stopped changing minds and lives since it burst onto the literary scene, The Things They Carried is a ground-breaking meditation on war, memory, imagination, and the redemptive power of storytelling. The Things They Carried depicts the men of Alpha Company: Jimmy Cross, Henry Dobbins, Rat Kiley, Mitchell Sanders, Norman Bowker, Kiowa, and the character Tim O’Brien, who has survived his tour in Vietnam to become a father and writer at the age of forty-three. Taught everywhere—from high school classrooms to graduate seminars in creative writing—it has become required reading for any American and continues to challenge readers in their perceptions of fact and fiction, war and peace, courage and fear and longing. The Things They Carried won France's prestigious Prix du Meilleur Livre Etranger and the Chicago Tribune Heartland Prize; it was also a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize and the National Book Critics Circle Award.

Download or read book Bad Dad Jokes written by Willow Creek Press and published by . This book was released on 2018 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The dad joke is a delicate thing. Part knowing humor, part lack of humor, it's only requirement is that it elicits not a laugh from its audience but the annoyed response: "Daaaaaaaaad." Bad Dad Jokes is the biggest, baddest collection of "so bad they're actually good" jokes that are guaranteed to deliver a daily dose of groans and giggles. Bad Dad Jokes is a one of a kind collection of extraordinary humor in one book. By giving this collection as a gift you will bring humor and lasting memories to events for years to come.

Download or read book Ask a Manager written by Alison Green and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2018-05-01 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the creator of the popular website Ask a Manager and New York’s work-advice columnist comes a witty, practical guide to 200 difficult professional conversations—featuring all-new advice! There’s a reason Alison Green has been called “the Dear Abby of the work world.” Ten years as a workplace-advice columnist have taught her that people avoid awkward conversations in the office because they simply don’t know what to say. Thankfully, Green does—and in this incredibly helpful book, she tackles the tough discussions you may need to have during your career. You’ll learn what to say when • coworkers push their work on you—then take credit for it • you accidentally trash-talk someone in an email then hit “reply all” • you’re being micromanaged—or not being managed at all • you catch a colleague in a lie • your boss seems unhappy with your work • your cubemate’s loud speakerphone is making you homicidal • you got drunk at the holiday party Praise for Ask a Manager “A must-read for anyone who works . . . [Alison Green’s] advice boils down to the idea that you should be professional (even when others are not) and that communicating in a straightforward manner with candor and kindness will get you far, no matter where you work.”—Booklist (starred review) “The author’s friendly, warm, no-nonsense writing is a pleasure to read, and her advice can be widely applied to relationships in all areas of readers’ lives. Ideal for anyone new to the job market or new to management, or anyone hoping to improve their work experience.”—Library Journal (starred review) “I am a huge fan of Alison Green’s Ask a Manager column. This book is even better. It teaches us how to deal with many of the most vexing big and little problems in our workplaces—and to do so with grace, confidence, and a sense of humor.”—Robert Sutton, Stanford professor and author of The No Asshole Rule and The Asshole Survival Guide “Ask a Manager is the ultimate playbook for navigating the traditional workforce in a diplomatic but firm way.”—Erin Lowry, author of Broke Millennial: Stop Scraping By and Get Your Financial Life Together

Download or read book Let s Pretend This Never Happened written by Jenny Lawson and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2012-04-17 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times bestselling (mostly true) memoir from the hilarious author of Furiously Happy. “Gaspingly funny and wonderfully inappropriate.”—O, The Oprah Magazine When Jenny Lawson was little, all she ever wanted was to fit in. That dream was cut short by her fantastically unbalanced father and a morbidly eccentric childhood. It did, however, open up an opportunity for Lawson to find the humor in the strange shame-spiral that is her life, and we are all the better for it. In the irreverent Let’s Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson’s long-suffering husband and sweet daughter help her uncover the surprising discovery that the most terribly human moments—the ones we want to pretend never happened—are the very same moments that make us the people we are today. For every intellectual misfit who thought they were the only ones to think the things that Lawson dares to say out loud, this is a poignant and hysterical look at the dark, disturbing, yet wonderful moments of our lives. Readers Guide Inside

Download or read book The Percy Jackson and the Olympians Book Three Titan s Curse written by Rick Riordan and published by Disney-Hyperion. This book was released on 2007-05 with total page 328 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this third book of the acclaimed series, Percy and his friends are escorting two new half-bloods safely to camp when they are intercepted by a manticore and learn that the goddess Artemis has been kidnapped.

Download or read book The Air He Breathes written by Brittainy Cherry and published by Sourcebooks Casablanca. This book was released on 2024 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Elizabeth is still reeling from the death of her husband that took place a year prior. She and her young daughter, Emma, took a year to stay with Elizabeth's mother. When the time has come, Elizabeth and Emma choose to return to their hometown of Meadows Creek, Wisconsin. On the drive back into town, Elizabeth accidentally hits a dog, and the owner grumpily dashes into the street and demands Elizabeth takes him and the dog to the vet. Tristan is the owner of the dog. He's cold and distant, but Elizabeth connects to him in some odd way, even if they didn't have the best first meetings. It is later discovered that Tristan Cole is Elizabeth's new neighbor, and he is tagged as the town's grumpy jerk who is closed-off to everyone around him, outside of Mr. Henson, Tristan's odd and quirky boss who owns the shop Needful Things. While Tristan tries his best to keep his distance from Elizabeth, their paths keep crossing in the small town. The townspeople warn Elizabeth to keep her distance from Tristan, as he's a bad seed, but she cannot help but feel drawn to his darkness. During one of their crossings, Tristan snaps at Elizabeth, telling her that he doesn't want to get to know her, or be her friend, even though she keeps insisting on that happening. He ends up kissing her, which throws them both for a loop, and after said kiss, he accidentally makes her fall down the hill they are standing on, making her get scrapped up and injured. During their next crossing, Tristan finds Elizabeth wandering drunk in the wooded area behind their homes, and he helps her to his house after realizing she's too wasted to be outside alone. They have a heart-to-heart and learn about one another's losses. It is after that connection that they come up with the bad idea to use one another to feel again. They began having a fling, using sex to feel connected to another, to make believe that their loved ones are still around, yet it goes sideways once Elizabeth's grief becomes too loud. It is at that point that Tristan decides that being friends with Elizabeth would be the right option instead of using sex to forget. While the two are building their friendship, and are falling more and more for one another, the best friend of Elizabeth's late husband, Tanner, makes it known that he has feelings for her. Elizabeth explains to Tanner that she cares for him, but not in that way. After Tanner takes the rejection, he is livid to find out that she is seeing the town's jerk, Tristan. Tanner threatens Tristan, and tries to trigger him from time to time, to make him snap in front of Elizabeth. After none of Tanner's tricks works, he goes the extra mile by notifying Elizabeth that it was her late husband who was in the car accident with Tristan's late wife and his son, which led to their deaths. Elizabeth doesn't handle this news well but keeps it to herself because she knows it will destroy Tristan. That was when Tanner took the news and revealed it to Tristan, making Tristan harshly end things with Elizabeth. He leaves town and goes to see his parents, where he falls apart. It is then in those conversations that he learns the night of the accident, after Elizabeth loss her husband, she found Tristan's mom in the lobby of the hospital alone. Elizabeth comforted her, and then went and sat with Tristan's wife so she wouldn't be alone while Tristan's mom went to check on his son. The story concludes with Elizabeth learning that Tanner was the one who messed with her late husband's car, which in turn caused the accident. She learns how obsessed he had been with Elizabeth for years. Tanner caused the accident in order to get Elizabeth's husband out of the picture, so he could be the man in her life. Once Tristan connected those dots, he returned to town to protect Elizabeth and Emma from the craziness that was Tanner. After making sure everyone was safe, Tristan confesses his love for Elizabeth, who loves him fully back, and they begin to build a new life together, while still honoring their loved ones from the past. The Air He Breathes is a story of hope, of compassion, and the true meaning of love"--

Download or read book The Tao of Martha written by Jen Lancaster and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2014-05-06 with total page 353 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One would think that with her impressive list of bestselling self-improvement memoirs Jen Lancaster would have it all together by now. One would be wrong. After all, she’s no Martha Stewart. And that’s why Jen is going to Martha up and live her life according to the advice of America’s overachieving older sister—the woman who turns lemons into lavender-infused lemonade. By immersing herself in Martha’s media empire, Jen embarks on a yearlong quest to take herself, her house, her husband (and maybe even her pets) to the next level—from closet organization to party planning. Maybe Jen can avoid food poisoning if she follows Martha’s dictates on proper storage. Maybe she can rid her workout clothes of meatball stains by using Martha’s laundry tips. Maybe she can create a more meaningful anniversary celebration than getting drunk in the pool with her husband. Again. And maybe she’ll discover that the key to happiness does, in fact, lie in Martha’s perfectly arranged cupboards and charcuterie platters.

Download or read book Pontypool Changes Everything written by Tony Burgess and published by ECW Press. This book was released on 2010-12-15 with total page 293 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A compelling, terrifying story of a devastating virus. You catch it in conversation, and once it has you, it leads you into another world where the undead chase you down the streets

Download or read book From the Dust Returned written by Ray Bradbury and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2013-06-25 with total page 294 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Ray Bradbury, America's most beloved storyteller, has spent a lifetime carrying readers to exhilarating and dangerous places, from dark street comers in unfamiliar cities and towns to the edge of the universe. Now, in an extraordinary flight of the imagination a half-century in the making, he takes us to a most wondrous destination: into the heart of an Eternal Family. They have lived for centuries in a house of legend and mystery in upper Illinois -- and they are not like other midwesterners. Rarely encountered in daylight hours, their children are curious and wild; their old ones have survived since before the Sphinx first sank its paws deep in Egyptian sands. And some sleep in beds with lids. Now the house is being readied in anticipation of the gala homecoming that will gather together the farflung branches of this odd and remarkable family. In the past-midnight stillness can be detected the soft fluttering of Uncle Einars wings. From her realm of sleep, Cecy, the fairest and most special daughter, can feel the approach of many a welcome being -- shapeshifter, telepath, somnambulist, vampire -- as she flies high in the consciousness of bird and bat. But in the midst of eager anticipation, a sense of doom pervades. For the world is changing. And death, no stranger, will always shadow this most singular family: Father, arisen from the Earth; Mother, who never sleeps but dreams; A Thousand Times Great Grandmére; Grandfather, who keeps the wildness of youth between his ears. And the boy who, more than anyone, carries the burden of time on his shoulders: Timothy, the sad and different foundling son who must share it all, remember, and tell...and who, alone out of all of them, must one day age and wither and die. By turns lyrical, wistful, poignant, and chilling, From the Dust Returned is the long-awaited new novel by the peerless Ray Bradbury -- a book that will surely be numbered among his most enduring masterworks.

Download or read book Salem s Lot written by Stephen King and published by Anchor. This book was released on 2008-05-06 with total page 673 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: SOON TO BE A NEW FILM, STREAMING ON MAX FALL OF 2024 • #1 BESTSELLER • Ben Mears has returned to Jerusalem’s Lot in hopes that exploring the history of the Marsten House, an old mansion long the subject of rumor and speculation, will help him cast out his personal devils and provide inspiration for his new book. "A master storyteller." —The Los Angeles Times When two young boys venture into the woods, and only one returns alive, Mears begins to realize that something sinister is at work. In fact, his hometown is under siege from forces of darkness far beyond his imagination. And only he, with a small group of allies, can hope to contain the evil that is growing within the borders of this small New England town. With this, his second novel, Stephen King established himself as an indisputable master of American horror, able to transform the old conceits of the genre into something fresh and all the more frightening for taking place in a familiar, idyllic locale.

Download or read book Monster in My Closet written by R. L. Naquin and published by . This book was released on 2012 with total page 171 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I stopped believing in monsters long ago. But I knew I wasn't imagining things when I found one in my kitchen baking muffins. I'd seen him before: lurking in my closet, scaring the crap out of my five-year-old self. Turns out that was a misunderstanding, and now Maurice needs a place to stay. How could I say no? After all, I've always been a magnet for the emotionally needy, and not just in my work as a wedding planner. Being able to sense the feelings of others can be a major pain. Don't get me wrong, I like helping people-and non-people. But this ability has turned me into a gourmet feast.

Download or read book Cooking with Pooh written by Marlene Brown and published by . This book was released on 1995-10-01 with total page 24 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This perfect combination of a book and activity in a reusable box offers simpl e, step-by-step directions for making cookies on sticks, pizzas and sandwiches, edible holiday ornaments, and more. Includes a set of four character-shaped cookie cutters.