Download or read book Dirty Jokes Your Mother Told Me written by D. M. Engel and published by . This book was released on 2012-04-01 with total page 146 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dirty Jokes Your Mother Told Me is a collection of short fiction that is sure to be the funniest and most bizarre book you pick up this year. Dirty Jokes is a compilation of 39 comedic pieces that will climb deep inside of your body cavity and make you laugh from places you never thought possible. How it gets in there is up to you. If you are a fan of Steve Martin's Cruel Shoes and Pure Drivel, then you will love this book. Dirty Jokes is like their ugly baby that went off its medication. In Dirty Jokes Your Mother Told Me, a time traveler is doomed to repeatedly visit the moment of his own conception. An out-of-work hospital custodian misunderstands the meaning of the term "flash mob" and attacks a group of dancers. Bernie Madoff steals a cab from a baby and tries to turn the ocean into condos. Dirty Jokes Your Mother Told Me: A Collection of Short-Ass Fiction was penned by D.M. Engel, the author of the best-selling books Obama Blade: Revenge of the First Black/Robot President, How to Monetize Your Children, Taint Farm, and A Pictoral History of Washcloths. In truth, he is a writer in New York City and the co-host of the podcast, White Dad Problems (whitedadproblems.com). Audio and video clips of Dirty Jokes can be found on its Facebook page, and more of D.M.'s writing and podcasts can be found at dmengel.com. "I loved it." --Jenny Lawson, The Bloggess

Download or read book Lies My Mother Told Me written by Melissa Rivers and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-04-12 with total page 202 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If you think Joan Rivers said funny, outrageous, and ridiculous things ONSTAGE, wait ’til you read the funny, outrageous, and ridiculous things she said OFFSTAGE…things that will make you laugh out loud…and keep Melissa in therapy for the foreseeable future. The only thing my mother loved more than making people laugh was lying…or as she’d say, “embellishing.” Her motto was: “Why let the truth ruin a good story?” This book contains some of those stories. ***************** “When Joan told a story, the truth disappeared faster than I did.” — Jimmy Hoffa “If you thought Dante’s Inferno was hot, read Lies My Mother Told Me; it’s a five-alarmer.” — Dante’s second wife, Allie “Twelve of my twenty-six personalities loved this book.” — Sybil “The words on the page absolutely crackle and spark; I burned my fingers reading it!” — Annie Sullivan “The Bible may be the good book, but Lies My Mother Told Me is way funnier.” — Matthew 2:14 The Jets. 7 “Lies My Mother Told Me is the feel-good book of 2022.” — Torquemada “All’s not well that ends well. I’ve had massages with happier endings.” — Wm. Shakespeare “Melissa, I don’t care what your mother said in this book, I LOVE your bangs.” — Mamie Eisenhower “Lies My Mother Told Me is so funny even those ‘woke’ m***********s will laugh.” — Lenny Bruce

Download or read book The Bible of Dirty Jokes written by Eileen Pollack and published by Four Way Books . This book was released on 2018-03-06 with total page 322 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Ketzel WeinrachÕs beloved brother Potsie goes missing in Las Vegas, she not only must try to find him, she must confront her familyÕs shady history and their ties to the legendary Jewish mob, Murder, Inc., as well as her troubling relationship to her cousin Perry (who runs a strip club on the outskirts of Vegas), her long and apparently not-so-loving marriage to her recently departed husband Morty Tittelman (a self-styled professor of dirty jokes and erotic folklore), and her own failed career as a stand-up comic.

Download or read book The Collected Short Fiction of Bruce Jay Friedman written by Bruce Jay Friedman and published by Open Road + Grove/Atlantic. This book was released on 2007-12-01 with total page 695 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An “irresistible” collection of short fiction by an author who “has been likened to everyone from J. D. Salinger to Woody Allen” (The New York Times Book Review). Hailed by Newsweek as “a bona fide literary event,” The Collected Short Fiction of Bruce Jay Friedman brings together dozens of the New York Times–bestselling author’s greatest stories, which originally appeared in Esquire, The New Yorker, and other magazines. “Readers who feel short stories are too high-flown—too literary, arcane, and serious—will find counterbalance in Friedman, whose stories have uncomplicated structures, obvious gists, intelligible metaphors, and unambiguous endings and come wrapped in humor. This compilation of his output in the short story form between 1953 and 1995 has a thematic arrangement, with categories such as ‘Mother,’ ‘Crazed Youth,’ and ‘Sex.’ Some of the more outstanding pieces are ‘The Subversive,’ about the narrator’s air force buddy whom the narrator believed to be the most all-American guy he ever met until his friend commits a crazed act; ‘The Gent,’ concerning a man who succumbs to a seduction by his best friend’s daughter; and ‘The Night Boxing Ended,’ in which ringside heckling goes way out of bounds.” —Booklist “From poignant bildungsroman to sly satire, from wicked comedy to surrealistic farce, this virtuosic collection covers more than four decades’ worth of short stories . . . Friedman explores themes such as loneliness, aging, fear, parenthood and ethnicity, spinning tales in an expertly modulated voice.” —Publishers Weekly “Friedman [is] more interesting than most of Malamud, Roth, and Bellow . . . What makes him more important is that he writes out of the viscera instead of the cerebrum.” —Nelson Algren, The Nation “Pure delight.” —Newsday

Download or read book Clean and Funny Jokes Laughs of a Life Time written by Paul Lane and published by AuthorHouse. This book was released on 2004-02-02 with total page 88 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: They say it takes a lot of muscle to frown but only one to smile. It has been proven that laughter is good medicine. This book is filled with a lot of laughter. Clean jokes for the whole family.

Download or read book In the Dark written by Lee and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2011-09-26 with total page 114 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Another morning waking up from a dead sleep to what seems to be turning into a daily ritual: vomiting into the wastebasket I have learned to keep at my bedside. Waking up from the horrible dreams I cant seem to control. Nightmares of the face of the man I was married to for twenty-seven years, never aware of the total evilness inside of the person I trusted not only as a husband but also as a father to our six children. Unable to control during sleep, the pictures brought to mind match the stories recently told and confessed. This cant be happening to me or my family!

Download or read book Primitive Secrets written by Deborah Turrell Atkinson and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2013-03-05 with total page 322 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One beautiful Hawaiian morning Storm Kayama walks into her lucrative Honolulu law office to find her adopted uncle, Miles Hamasaki, at his desk, stiff and cold. Years before, Miles had fulfilled a promise to Storm's father to raise Storm with his own family. But now questions emerge about Hamasaki's death and her adopted family, and Storm's suspicions rise. Heading to the Big Island for a weekend away from escalating pressures, Storm narrowly escapes a terrible accident. Later, with her "aunt" Maile, a traditional Hawaiian healer, and Keone, a paniolo on the huge Parker Ranch, Storm encounters a legend from her youth and a family totem, or 'aumakua, which they say will protect her. Or will it? As Storm struggles to heal wounds from her childhood and bring justice to Hamasaki's killer, she also must come to grips with rifts in her life and culture.

Download or read book My Journeys through Healings written by LT. Col. Dr. M. Mohan Kumar and published by Notion Press. This book was released on 2016-09-26 with total page 196 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: My Journeys through Healings is an incredible story of a soldier’s battles against triple maladies, starting with cancer. Imagine if all of a sudden, the harmless polyps in the colon of a heart patient, who had undergone bypass surgery, turned out to be deadly cancer! Between possible death on the operation table and the consequences of a growing malignancy, the patient is left with no choice. Here he is now, minus nine inches of his colon, to tell his story. My Journeys through Healings is a heart-warming, wonderfully sensitive and fascinating narration of hope, recovery and self-discovery that grips, inspires and enriches the reader.

Download or read book That Reminds Me Finding the Funny in a Serious World written by Michael Close and published by Lulu.com. This book was released on 2012-12-01 with total page 220 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Michael Close is an inveterate joke teller whose stories have brought gales of laughter from audiences around the world. For more than twenty years, Michael's friends and colleagues have eagerly awaited a collection of jokes from his enormous repertoire. "That Reminds Me" is that compilation - more than 250 of the best clean (and not so clean) jokes you've ever read. But this is much more than a joke book. Michael shares heartfelt reminiscences of the funny people who have enriched his life, stories of crazy personal experiences, and thoughts on the importance of "finding the funny" in your own life. This is the perfect book for anyone who needs a good laugh. Foreword by Penn Jillette [The jokes in this collection range from squeaky clean to R-rated. Words that you can't use on network television appear occasionally. If such language offends you, please don't purchase this book.]

Download or read book The Stand Up Groomsman written by Jackie Lau and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2022-10-25 with total page 369 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "A low-angst charmer."—New York Times Book Review A bridesmaid and groomsman put their differences aside to get their best friends down the aisle in this opposites-attract steamy romantic comedy. They say to never meet your heroes, but when Vivian Liao's roommate gets engaged to her favorite actor’s costar, she has no choice but to come face-to-face with Melvin Lee again. He's just as funny and handsome as he is on-screen...but he thinks she’s an ice queen and a corporate sellout. It's none of his business how she chooses to live her life, no matter how charismatic he is. Mel is used to charming audiences as an actor and stand-up comedian, but he can't seem to thaw Vivian’s defenses. If she can ignore the simmering attraction below the surface, so can he. The only thing uniting them is their goal for their friends’ wedding to go off without a hitch. As they collaborate on wedding cake and karaoke parties, Mel realizes he might have seriously misjudged this bridesmaid, while Vivian discovers the best man might just be as dazzling off-screen as he is on. With the wedding underway, maybe more than one happily ever after is in the future.

Download or read book Code Girls written by Liza Mundy and published by Hachette Books. This book was released on 2017-10-10 with total page 524 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The award-winning New York Times bestseller about the American women who secretly served as codebreakers during World War II--a "prodigiously researched and engrossing" (New York Times) book that "shines a light on a hidden chapter of American history" (Denver Post). Recruited by the U.S. Army and Navy from small towns and elite colleges, more than ten thousand women served as codebreakers during World War II. While their brothers and boyfriends took up arms, these women moved to Washington and learned the meticulous work of code-breaking. Their efforts shortened the war, saved countless lives, and gave them access to careers previously denied to them. A strict vow of secrecy nearly erased their efforts from history; now, through dazzling research and interviews with surviving code girls, bestselling author Liza Mundy brings to life this riveting and vital story of American courage, service, and scientific accomplishment.

Download or read book Self and School Success written by Edwin William Farrell and published by SUNY Press. This book was released on 1994-01-01 with total page 190 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Data for the book were collected by young people in neighborhood schools who taped unstructured dialogue with successful students. Vignettes, told in the words of the young people themselves, address issues of schools and their relation to students' careers, the roles of teachers and parents, the support of community and religious agencies, as well as the influence of peers regarding drugs, violence, and sexuality.

Download or read book A Time to Laugh Jokes Funny Stories from Africa 6th Edition written by Israel Oyerinde Omotosho and published by Lulu.com. This book was released on 2018-02-20 with total page 154 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The author of this book, Prince Israel Oyerinde Omotosho, has compiled more than 120 jokes and short stories for your enjoyment. The jokes and stories are contextually based in Nigeria, West Africa. They will make you laugh till your ribs protest!

Download or read book Eternal Flame Book 6 A time travel paranormal romance written by Chrissy Peebles and published by Dark Shadows Publishing. This book was released on 2014-11-23 with total page 121 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sarah continues to fight for the people she loves. She lives in hiding from the Blue Ring Immortals who wish to use her DNA to cure the virus that some immortals are inflicted with. Jackson comes up with a plan to throw the immortals out of power and rid the world of them once and for all. But he can't do it without Sarah's help. With everything crashing down around Sarah, can she save her family she loves so much? Can love conquer all? (A time travel, paranormal romance) A fantasy romance... With Paranormal elements. Enchanting romance! ageless romance, romance, sexy hero, time travel fiction, time travel romance, time travel romance, time travel, fantasy adult fairytale retelling, paranormal romance, classic tale, mythology and folktales, medieval historical romance, adult fantasy, castle, medieval, ancient, royal romance, fairytale romance, knight, king, queen, marriage of convenience, fake husband, fake wife, fake marriage, supernatural, magic, superpowers, princess, romantic, suspenseful, fantasy romance, paranormal romance, time travel romance, time travel, otherworldly lovers,

Download or read book A Mother s World written by Marybeth Bond and published by Travelers' Tales. This book was released on 1998 with total page 244 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In stories close to home and far away, from Peru to Kenya and New York City to Ukraine, mothers recount adventures and experiences traveling with their small children, their grown children, and their own parents. They travel to find their adopted children, they become pregnant, and they recount the joys and pains of motherhood in a language that will move women and men alike.

Download or read book 500 All Time Funniest Jokes Stories about Sex written by Ron A. Sheila and published by Acadia Scale Press. This book was released on 2002 with total page 152 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this humorous look at sex, the authors have tried not to be offensive.

Download or read book Rose Leopard written by Richard Yaxley and published by Univ. of Queensland Press. This book was released on 2016-04-18 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Vince isn't perfect, but his love for Kaz reveals the best of him. Their coastal farm is an idyllic place to raise their two children, and Kaz ensures that life is easy and full of fun. Here, Vince can indulge both his passions - for words and for his wife.But when an unexpected event shatters their contentment, Vince isn't ready for the responsibilities he must face.In creating the fable of the Rose Leopard - the most beautiful creature in the world - he tries to explain to his children a universe that doesn't always make sense."The Rose Leopard" is a compelling debut novel, a poignant and often funny tale of love, grief and the transformative power of story-telling.