Download or read book Unusually Stupid Americans written by Kathryn Petras and published by Villard. This book was released on 2007-12-18 with total page 305 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A hilarious collection of lists, statistics, news items, quotations, and facts detailing stupid acts of Americans from all walks of life—by the authors of the bestselling The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said Everyone knows that America is “the land of the free and the home of the brave,” but sometimes that means we’re free to be as bravely stupid as we want! In Unusually Stupid Americans, Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras assemble choice bits of stupidity, U.S.A.-style, including •the top seriously flawed American advertising moments, including Pacific Airlines’ brilliant “You’re scared of flying? So’s our pilot!” ad campaign, which led the airline to bankruptcy within two months of the campaign’s inception •the Martin Luther King, Jr., celebration in Florida, where a plaque was un-veiled that was intended to honor the actor James Earl Jones but instead read, “Thank you James Earl Ray for keeping the dream alive” (an unfortunate slip-up, as James Earl Ray was King’s assassin) •and much more!
Download or read book Unusually Stupid Politicians written by Kathryn Petras and published by Villard. This book was released on 2009-03-12 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras, bestselling authors of the scathingly funny Unusually Stupid Americans and Unusually Stupid Celebrities, now set their bipartisan sights on the hallowed halls of the United States government. Unusually Stupid Politicians exposes the mind-boggling but true political mishaps, missteps, and miscues that have even the savviest spin doctors shaking their heads and saying “No comment.” Sections include • Extreme Hairsplitting–such as when Florida governor Jeb Bush, after being accused of hiding in a closet from rampaging Democrats, denied the allegation completely, stating that “it was actually a boiler room” • Brilliant and Innovative Ideas from The Pentagon– like their groundbreaking "Gay Bomb," their "Bad Breath Inducing" halitosis weapon and their plans to enlist The Three Stooges in the fight against terror. • Creative Political Excuses——such as “I just discovered I’m Jewish and it’s a Holy Day,”——used by Senator George Allen, who, after learning of his Jewish heritage, got out of a Senate hearing to “observe” Yom Kippur • The Most Egregiously Large Political Egos–measured in standard Chuck Schumer Ego Units (CSEUs) This hilarious and eye-opening exposé gives awards for “How I Blew My Campaign” and “Worst Campaign Ad,” and shares a list of candidates “endorsed by God,” as well as a list of those who lost because of Satan. So turn off C-SPAN and quit text-messaging congressional pages–you’re about to learn what the definition of “is” is.
Download or read book Unusually Stupid Celebrities written by Kathryn Petras and published by Villard. This book was released on 2009-04-22 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Greeks honored Zeus, the Romans revered Juno, but modern civilization worships a different sort of god: Celebrity. Face it, we follow the stars’ every move, fashion choice, and deliciously dishy affairs. Now Kathryn Petras and Ross Petras, authors of Unusually Stupid Americans, pull the demanding divas, screwball stars, and celebu-twits off their pedestals–and prove it doesn’t take a degree in rocket science to become famous. Cases in point: • Courtney Love misses an important court date relating to “possession of a controlled substance” because she can’t find a professional bodyguard at the last minute. • Mariah Carey’s entourage includes a skirt-from-touching-floor specialist, a towel hand-off person, and a professional drink holder/lifter. • Savvy traveler Paris Hilton concludes that all of Europe is, “like, French.” • Mensa candidate and rocker Tommy Lee is pretty sure that Winston Churchill was president during the Civil War, that the numeric equivalent of pi is “the two-equals-MC-squared thing,” and that an isosceles triangle is “somewhere in Bermuda.” Feuds, faith, family, money, sex, tantrums, travel–no star-studded stone is left unturned. Filled with jaw-dropping anecdotes, quirky quotes, and special stupid-celebrity awards, Unusually Stupid Celebrities provides a red-faced glimpse of the red carpet.
Download or read book The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America written by Matt Kracht and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2019-04-02 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: National bestselling book: Featured on Midwest, Mountain Plains, New Atlantic, Northern, Pacific Northwest and Southern Regional Indie Bestseller Lists Perfect book for the birder and anti-birder alike A humorous look at 50 common North American dumb birds: For those who have a disdain for birds or bird lovers with a sense of humor, this snarky, illustrated handbook is equal parts profane, funny, and—let's face it—true. Featuring common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Matt Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with humorous, yet angry, ink drawings. With The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America, you won't need to wonder what all that racket is anymore! • Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more. • The essential guide to all things wings with migratory maps, tips for birding, musings on the avian population, and the ethics of birdwatching. • Matt Kracht is an amateur birder, writer, and illustrator who enjoys creating books that celebrate the humor inherent in life's absurdities. Based in Seattle, he enjoys gazing out the window at the beautiful waters of Puget Sound and making fun of birds. "There are loads of books out there for bird lovers, but until now, nothing for those that love to hate birds. The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America fills the void, packed with snarky illustrations that chastise the flying animals in a funny, profane way. " – Uncrate A humorous animal book with 50 common North American birds for people who love birds and also those who love to hate birds • A perfect coffee table or bar top conversation-starting book • Makes a great Mother's Day, Father's Day, birthday, or retirement gift
Download or read book America Again written by Stephen Colbert and published by Grand Central Publishing. This book was released on 2012-10-02 with total page 244 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Book store nation, in the history of mankind there has never been a greater country than America. You could say we're the #1 nation at being the best at greatness. But as perfect as America is in every single way, America is broken! And we can't exchange it because we're 236 years past the 30-day return window. Look around--we don't make anything anymore, we've mortgaged our future to China, and the Apologist-in-Chief goes on world tours just to bow before foreign leaders. Worse, the L.A. Four Seasons Hotel doesn't even have a dedicated phone button for the Spa. You have to dial an extension! Where did we lose our way?! It's high time we restored America to the greatness it never lost! Luckily, America Again will singlebookedly pull this country back from the brink. It features everything from chapters, to page numbers, to fonts. Covering subject's ranging from healthcare ("I shudder to think where we'd be without the wide variety of prescription drugs to treat our maladies, such as think-shuddering") to the economy ("Life is giving us lemons, and we're shipping them to the Chinese to make our lemon-flavored leadonade") to food ("Feel free to deep fry this book-it's a rich source of fiber"), Stephen gives America the dose of truth it needs to get back on track.
Download or read book The 776 Stupidest Things Ever Said written by Ross Petras and published by Main Street Books. This book was released on 2010-12-08 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A connoisseur's compendium of Freudian slips, spoonerisms, double-talk, and utter bosh from famous and infamous figures past and present -- a complete course in anti-eloquence by the foot-in-mouth champions of all time.
Download or read book Why Smart People Do Stupid Things with Money written by Bert Whitehead and published by Sterling Publishing Company, Inc.. This book was released on 2009-06 with total page 244 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For many of us, planning our own financial future presents pitfalls at every turn, because the truth is, when it comes to money, we are not always rational. Now you can take control of your economic life with confidence. Bert Whitehead, one of the top money-management advisors in America, gives you all the information you need to manage your wealth wisely by relying on your strongest asset-yourself. Book jacket.
Download or read book America the Unusual written by John W Kingdon and published by John W. Kingdon (copyright holder). This book was released on 1999-01-01 with total page 134 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A book about why the United States is different from other industrialized countries.
Download or read book Idiot America written by Charles Pierce and published by Anchor. This book was released on 2010-05-04 with total page 322 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NATIONAL BESTSELLER The three Great Premises of Idiot America: · Any theory is valid if it sells books, soaks up ratings, or otherwise moves units · Anything can be true if someone says it loudly enough · Fact is that which enough people believe. Truth is determined by how fervently they believe it With his trademark wit and insight, veteran journalist Charles Pierce delivers a gut-wrenching, side-splitting lament about the glorification of ignorance in the United States. Pierce asks how a country founded on intellectual curiosity has somehow deteriorated into a nation of simpletons more apt to vote for an American Idol contestant than a presidential candidate. But his thunderous denunciation is also a secret call to action, as he hopes that somehow, being intelligent will stop being a stigma, and that pinheads will once again be pitied, not celebrated. Erudite and razor-sharp, Idiot America is at once an invigorating history lesson, a cutting cultural critique, and a bullish appeal to our smarter selves.
Download or read book Stupid Conservatives written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2012-04-10 with total page 262 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Leland Gregory's 17 previous humor collections with AMP are all in print and all are staples on the humor backlist, including Stupid American History, which was a New York Times best-seller, and Stupid History, which has shipped over 130,000 copies. Silly, shocking, weird, and hilariously funny, the one- or two-paragraph anecdotes that comprise Gregory's new anthology of stupid things said and done by American conservatives--politicians, citizens, journalists, professionals, workers, anyone who stands to the right of center--are culled from print, online, and broadcast media from all over the world. Here's a sample: * "When I see a 9/11 victim family on television, or whatever, I'm just like, 'Oh shut up.' I'm so sick of them because they're always complaining." --Glenn Beck, September 9, 2005
Download or read book Cruel and Unusual Idiots written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2009-06-15 with total page 289 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Some wonder why and some wonder why not. But it's the latter ones who make you scratch your head and say, 'What in the world were you thinking?'" Former Saturday Night Live writer Leland Gregory skewers cruel crooks and the idiotically inane. From absurd 911 calls to presidential philosophizing and political pandering to foolish felons, Leland Gregory generates the best laughs by exposing the worst of human nature. Inside this collection, Gregory offers more than 275 accounts of human stupidity at its most malicious and peculiar: * In August 2006, 40-year-old Darrel Rodgers was treated at a Bloomington, Indiana, hospital for a self-inflicted gunshot wound to his left knee. Rogers explained that he shot himself seeking to relieve the pain in his knee, which probably stemmed from shooting himself in the same knee ten years earlier. * And, because some of the stories are just that unbelievable, each anecdote, quote, or factoid is presented with relevant background information--including its verified news source.
Download or read book Stupid American History written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2009-04-21 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New York Times Bestseller: Welcome to the land of the free, the home of the brave—and, apparently, the dumb, bizarre, and gullible . . . Did you know that . . . *John Tyler was on his knees playing marbles when he was informed that Benjamin Harrison had died and he was now president of the United States *For reasons still unknown, Texas congressman Thomas Lindsay Blanton, a Presbyterian Sunday school teacher and prohibitionist, inserted dirty words into the Congressional Record in 1921—for which his colleagues officially censured him by a vote of 293-0 *Two US presidents were indentured servants—and one of them ran away and wound up with a $10 reward posted for his capture From Columbus to George W. Bush, the bestselling coauthor of America’s Dumbest Criminals leads us through the many mythconceptions of our nation’s history in this lively book, exposing lots of entertaining moments of idiocy and inanity along the time line.
Download or read book S Is for Stupid written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2010-10-01 with total page 418 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An A-to-Z treasury of dumb, disastrous, and hard-to-believe human behavior from the New York Times-bestselling author of Stupid History! * A doctor’s actual diagnostic notation: The patient is married but sexually active. * “Shooting Reported at Firing Range” —The State, Columbia, South Carolina, August 4, 2006 * Arrested for public urination in Bowling Green, Ohio: Mr. Joshua Pees. —The Sentinel-Tribune, Bowling Green, Ohio, September 5, 2001 From absurd 911 calls to presidential philosophizing and foolish felons, Leland Gregory generates the best laughs by exposing the worst of human nature. This best-of collection features fifty percent new material and fifty percent fan favorites, arranged alphabetically by topic. And because the stories Gregory chronicles are just that unbelievable, each anecdote, quote, or factoid is presented with relevant background information, including its verified news source.
Download or read book How Dumb Are You written by Adam Winer and published by . This book was released on 2008-06 with total page 144 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: What’s the capital of Canada? Who’s the president pictured on the dime? Do you have even the slightest recollection of how to multiply fractions? National Lampoon’sHow Dumb Are You'is filled with questions every mildly-educated American should be able to answer — but often can’t. Written by Adam Winer (a panelist on VH1’s hit pop culture comedy showBest Week Ever),this Great American Stupidity Quiz is perfect for readers interested in either measuring their own personal mental failings or simply giving the gift of lowered self-esteem to a friend. Plus,How Dumb Are You'pairs its forehead-slapping quiz questions with intriguing bonus trivia and groundbreaking metrics that scientifically measure a reader’s exact level of stupidity. Undoubtedly,How Dumb Are You'will become the defining literary work of the modern era. You should probably buy it.
Download or read book American Journal of Dental Science written by and published by . This book was released on 1869 with total page 100 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book The American Florist written by and published by . This book was released on 1917 with total page 1528 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Stupid White Men written by Michael Moore and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2001 with total page 312 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sorry excuses for the state of the nation. United States. Manifesto on malfeasance and mediocrity. Satire.
