Download or read book The Onion Presents A Book of Jean s Own written by Jean Teasdale and published by St. Martin's Griffin. This book was released on 2010-10-12 with total page 266 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A few words from the author and eponymous columnist behind The Onion's column, "A Room of Jean's Own," Jean Teasdale: Hi Jeanketeers and Jeanketeers-to-be!! As The Onion's very own Humor and Human-Interest columnist, I've been entertaining readers for 15 years with kooky tales of life with my hubby and our two feline children. Now for the first time, li'l ol' me shines front-and-center in a book of my very own! A Book of Jean's Own! features all-original, never-before-published material, and if that wasn't impressive enough, marks the very first Onion book by a solo writer! Historical, huh? My book is sure to find an eager audience among The Onion's ten-million-strong readership. Wait, ten million people? I had no idea! Frankly, that scares me a little. We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto! (Oh shoot, I should have put that hilarious phrase in my book!) A Book of Jean's Own! also marks a departure from past Onion books in that it isn't crammed with headlines and articles in teeny-weeny print! Instead, I write about the stuff that really matters: shopping, chocolate, part-time jobs, and hot Hollywood hunks! Whether you read my book on the bus, the beach, or the toilet, you're guaranteed to find something to chuckle at and deeply relate to! Among the many nuggets of fun: * I tell you the Twenty Things That Are Better Than Sex! * For the first time ever, you learn my maiden name! * I spill the secrets of my scrumptious chocolate-loaded desserts, such as Ooey Gooey Choco-Cocoa-Mocha Cupcakes With Raspberry Filling And Coconut-Cream Cheese-Cola Frosting! * Acquire valuable, real-world tips on coping with a job you dislike, getting through those rough teenage years, and styling a Jean hairdo of your very own! * Get a giggle out of my doodles and overdose on the words of wisdom that are my Jean Proverbs! * You've heard of pity parties—get my tips for throwing your very own self-pity party! * Check out my own cure for the blues, the Plush Jamboree! * Witness my nervous breakdown while writing this book (well, writing is hard, after all!) * Also for the first time ever, Hubby Rick speaks! (Spoiler: It's not entirely in grunts!) * Lots of exclamation points! (And phrases in parentheses!) I'm sure every single one of those ten million readers will buy my book! And who knows? They just may find something in it that will help them lead happier and better lives!

Download or read book The Onion Girl written by Charles de Lint and published by Macmillan + ORM. This book was released on 2002-08-03 with total page 657 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “[This] fantasy moves from the outer to the inner world with amazing ease and should satisfy new and old fans of this prolific and gifted storyteller.” —Publishers Weekly In novel after novel, and story after story, Charles de Lint has brought an imaginary North American city to vivid life. Newford: where magic lights dark streets; where myths walk clothed in modern shapes; where a broad cast of extraordinary people work to keep the whole world turning. At the center of all the entwined lives in Newford stands a young artist named Jilly Coppercorn, with her tangled hair, her paint-splattered jeans, a smile perpetually on her lips—Jilly, whose paintings capture the hidden beings that dwell in the city’s shadows. Now, at last, de Lint tells Jilly’s own story . . . for behind the painter’s fey charm lies a dark secret and a past she’s labored to forget. And that past is coming to claim her now. “I’m the onion girl,” Jilly Coppercorn says. “Pull back the layers of my life, and you won’t find anything at the core. Just a broken child. A hollow girl.” She’s very, very good at running. But life has just forced Jilly to stop. At the Publisher’s request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied. “A master storyteller, [de Lint] blends Celtic, Native American, and other cultures into a seamless mythology that resonates with magic and truth.” —Library Journal “Like great writers of magic realism, [de Lint] writes about people in the world we know, encountering magic as a part of that world. Fairy tales come true, and their magic affects realistic characters full of particular lusts and fears.” —Booklist

Download or read book Onion John written by Joseph Krumgold and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 1984-04-04 with total page 260 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The story of a friendship between a 12-year-old boy and an immigrant handyman, almost wrecked by the good intentions of the townspeople.

Download or read book The Sharper Your Knife the Less You Cry written by Kathleen Flinn and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2008-09-02 with total page 308 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "...engaging, intelligent, and surprisingly suspenseful." —Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat, Pray, Love The unforgettable New York Times best-selling journey of self-discovery and finding one's true calling in life Kathleen Flinn was a thirty-six-year-old middle manager trapped on the corporate ladder - until her boss eliminated her job. Instead of sulking, she took the opportunity to check out of the rat race for good - cashing in her savings, moving to Paris, and landing a spot at the venerable Le Cordon Blue cooking school. The Sharper Your Knife, the Less You Cry is the funny and inspiring account of her struggle in a stew of hot-tempered, chefs, competitive classmates, her own "wretchedly inadequate" French - and how she mastered the basics of French cuisine. Filled with rich, sensual details of her time in the kitchen - the ingredients, cooking techniques, wine, and more than two dozen recipes - and the vibrant sights and sounds of the markets, shops, and avenues of Paris, it is also a journey of self-discovery, transformation, and, ultimately, love.

Download or read book Anatole written by Eve Titus and published by Knopf Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2006-11-14 with total page 34 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Anatole is a most honorable mouse. When he realizes that humans are upset by mice sampling their leftovers, he is shocked! He must provide for his beloved family--but he is determined to find a way to earn his supper. And so he heads for the tasting room at the Duvall Cheese Factory. On each cheese, he leaves a small note--"good," "not so good," "needs orange peel"--and signs his name. When workers at the Duvall factory find his notes in the morning, they are perplexed--but they realize that this mysterious Anatole has an exceptional palate and take his advice. Soon Duvall is making the best cheese in all of Paris! They would like to give Anatole a reward--if only they could find him...

Download or read book The Onion Book of Known Knowledge written by The Onion and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2012-10-23 with total page 259 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Are you a witless cretin with no reason to live? Would you like to know more about every piece of knowledge ever? Do you have cash? Then congratulations, because just in time for the death of the print industry as we know it comes the final book ever published, and the only one you will ever need: The Onion's compendium of all things known. Replete with an astonishing assemblage of facts, illustrations, maps, charts, threats, blood, and additional fees to edify even the most simple-minded book-buyer, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge is packed with valuable information -- such as the life stages of an Aunt; places to kill one's self in Utica, New York; and the dimensions of a female bucket, or "pail." With hundreds of entries for all 27 letters of the alphabet, The Onion Book of Known Knowledge must be purchased immediately to avoid the sting of eternal ignorance.

Download or read book Thoughts Without A Thinker written by Mark Epstein and published by Basic Books. This book was released on 2013-07-30 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Blending the lessons of psychotherapy with Buddhist teachings, Mark Epstein offers a revolutionary understanding of what constitutes a healthy emotional life The line between psychology and spirituality has blurred, as clinicians, their patients, and religious seekers explore new perspectives on the self. A landmark contribution to the field of psychoanalysis, Thoughts Without a Thinker describes the unique psychological contributions offered by the teachings of Buddhism. Drawing upon his own experiences as a psychotherapist and meditator, New York-based psychiatrist Mark Epstein lays out the path to meditation-inspired healing, and offers a revolutionary new understanding of what constitutes a healthy emotional life.

Download or read book Who Asked You written by Terry McMillan and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2015-08-04 with total page 466 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Trinetta drops off her two young boys with her mother, Betty Jean - and then pulls a disappearing act. BJ is a sassy, pull-no-punches, trademark McMillan matriarch, and she already has her hands full picking up the slack for her other kids, coaching her best friend Tammy through her own tribulations and dealing with two feuding sisters, all while holding down a job as a hotel maid. Who Asked You? raises questions about how we care for one another and how we set limits for those we love when the demands are too great.

Download or read book The Artists and Writers Cookbook written by Natalie Eve Garrett and published by powerHouse Books. This book was released on 2016-10-11 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Artists' and Writers' Cookbook is a collection of personal, food-related stories with recipes from 76 contemporary artists and writers. Inspired by a book from 1961, The (original) Artists' & Writers' Cookbook included recipes from the likes of Marcel Duchamp, Man Ray, Marianne Moore, and Harper Lee. This new, vibrantly illustrated version includes stories and recipes from Anthony Doerr, Leanne Shapton, Joyce Carol Oates, John Currin and Rachel Feinstein, Ed Ruscha, Neil Gaiman, Edwidge Danticat, Aimee Bender, Gregory Crewdson, James Franco, Francesca Lia Block, Swoon, Nelson DeMille, Rick Moody and Laurel Nakadate, Nikki Giovanni, T.C. Boyle, Lev Grossman, Roz Chast, Heidi Julavits, Marina Abramović, Curtis Sittenfeld, Julia Alvarez, and many others. In The Artists' and Writers' Cookbook,Anthony Doerr lures us out into the wild to find huckleberries andhappiness. Neil Gaiman makes a perfectly eerie cheese omelet while Ed Ruschaassociates his cactus omelet with "a time of doom." Yiyun Li eats rations inBeijing while Edwidge Danticat prepares a soup to celebrate freedom. NelsonDeMille reminisces about a meal he ate 40 years ago when serving in Vietnam;Kamrooz Aram recalls childhood "picnics" in his basement in Tehran during airraids. Sanford Biggers updates a soul food classic-"something tasty to lessenthe bitter taste of consistent, systematic oppression." Paul Muldoon and AimeeBender conjure food-related apocalyptic visions. Marina Abramović shares adish best consumed on top of a volcano, Elissa Schappell dreams of playing SergeGainsbourg records to snails, and Padgett Powell tastes a dish that reverses timeand space. Daniel Wallace woos with an eggplant sandwich. Francesca Lia Blocktells us how to fall in love. The essays are at turns comedic and heart-wrenching, personal and apocalyptic, with recipes that are enchanting to read and recreate. One part cookbook and one part intimate self-portrait, The Artists' and Writers' Cookbook is a portal into the kitchens and personal lives of an unmatched collection of contemporary artists and writers.

Download or read book You Are There written by Jean-Claude Forest and published by . This book was released on 2015-12-20 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: You Are There is an unexpected collaboration between the darkly cynical Jacques Tardi and the playful fantasist Jean-Claude Forest (of Barbarella fame). It is set on a small island off the coast of France, where unscrupulous landowners have succeeded in overtaking the land from the last heir of a previously wealthy family. His domain now reduced to the walls that border the patches of land he used to own, the half-mad fellow prowls the walls all day, eking out a living by collecting tolls at each gate. His seemingly hopeless struggle to recover his birthright becomes complicated as the government sees a way of using his plight for the sake of political expediency, and the romantic intervention of the daughter of one of the landowners (who has her own sordid history with the politician) engenders further difficulties. Set in Tardi's preferred early 20th century milieu, You Are There is drawn in his crisp 1980s neo-"clear line" style, gorgeously detailed, with impossibly deep slabs of black.

Download or read book Once Upon a Marigold written by Jean Ferris and published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. This book was released on 2004 with total page 292 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this witty spoof of fairy tales, Christian, a commoner, falls for Princess Marigold, and it's up to him to untwist an odd love triangle and foil a scheming queen who wants to take over the kingdom.

Download or read book Betrayals written by Carla Neggers and published by MIRA. This book was released on 2009-03-01 with total page 394 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Rebecca Blackburn caught a glimpse of the famed Jupiter Stones as a small child. Unaware of their significance, she forgot about them—until she discovered the priceless, long-missing gems were the key to a deadly chain of events spanning thirty years and three continents…sparing no one. When a seemingly innocent photograph reignites one man's simmering desire for vengeance, Rebecca turns to Jared Sloan, the love she lost to tragedy and scandal. His own life has changed forever because of the secrets buried deep by their two families. Their relentless quest for the truth will dredge up bitter memories and shocking revelations of misplaced loyalty, dangerous pride and naked ambition…and they will stop at nothing to expose a cold-blooded killer.

Download or read book Hands on the Freedom Plow written by Faith S. Holsaert and published by University of Illinois Press. This book was released on 2010-09-30 with total page 658 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The women in SNCC acquired new skills, experienced personal growth, sustained one another, and even had fun in the midst of serious struggle. Readers are privy to their analyses of the Movement---its tactics, strategies, and underlying philosophies. The contributors revisit central debates of the struggle including the role of nonviolence and self-defense, the role of white people in a black-led movement, and the role of women within the Movement and the society at large. --

Download or read book Little Red Readings written by Angela E. Hubler and published by Univ. Press of Mississippi. This book was released on 2014-04-29 with total page 277 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A significant body of scholarship examines the production of children's literature by women and minorities, as well as the representation of gender, race, and sexuality. But few scholars have previously analyzed class in children's literature. This definitive collection remedies that by defining and exemplifying historical materialist approaches to children's literature. The introduction of Little Red Readings lucidly discusses characteristics of historical materialism, the methodological approach to the study of literature and culture first outlined by Karl Marx, defining key concepts and analyzing factors that have marginalized this tradition, particularly in the United States. The thirteen essays here analyze a wide range of texts—from children's bibles to Mary Poppins to The Hunger Games—using concepts in historical materialism from class struggle to the commodity. Essayists apply the work of Marxist theorists such as Ernst Bloch and Fredric Jameson to children's literature and film. Others examine the work of leftist writers in India, Germany, England, and the United States. The authors argue that historical materialist methodology is critical to the study of children's literature, as children often suffer most from inequality. Some of the critics in this collection reveal the ways that literature for children often functions to naturalize capitalist economic and social relations. Other critics champion literature that reveals to readers the construction of social reality and point to texts that enable an understanding of the role ordinary people might play in creating a more just future. The collection adds substantially to our understanding of the political and class character of children's literature worldwide and contributes to the development of a radical history of children's literature.

Download or read book Good Housekeeping written by and published by . This book was released on 1928 with total page 1726 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book MARK TWAIN The Man Behind the Humor Complete Autobiographical Books Biographies written by Mark Twain and published by e-artnow. This book was released on 2017-07-21 with total page 4481 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This collection of travel books, essays, speeches, letters and autobiographical writings illustrates the other side of the man known as Mark Twain. Travel Books The Innocents Abroad Roughing It Old Times on the Mississippi A Tramp Abroad Life on the Mississippi Following the Equator: A Journey Around the World Some Rambling Notes of an Idle Excursion Essays, Satires & Articles How to Tell a Story, and Other Essays What Is Man? And Other Essays Editorial Wild Oats Advice to Youth Fenimore Cooper's Literary Offences Concerning the Jews To the Person Sitting in Darkness To My Missionary Critics Christian Science Queen Victoria's Jubilee Essays on Paul Bourget The Treaty With China, its Provisions Explained In Defence of Harriet Shelley Mrs. Eddy in Error Stirring Times in Austria The Czar's Soliloquy King Leopold's Soliloquy Adam's Soliloquy Essays on Copyrights Other Essays The Complete Speeches The Complete Letters Chapters from my Autobiography Biography Mark Twain: A Biography by Albert Bigelow Paine Samuel Langhorne Clemens (1835-1910), better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer, humorist, entrepreneur, publisher, and lecturer. He is best known for his two novels – The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and its sequel, the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, but his satirical stories and travel books are also widely popular. His wit and satire, in prose and in speech, earned him praise from critics and peers. He was lauded as the greatest American humorist of his age.

Download or read book The Complete Works of Mark Twain Novels Short Stories Memoirs Travel Books Letters More Illustrated written by Mark Twain and published by e-artnow. This book was released on 2017-11-15 with total page 7920 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This carefully edited collection has been designed and formatted to the highest digital standards and adjusted for readability on all devices. Contents: Novels The Adventures of Tom Sawyer Adventures of Huckleberry Finn The Gilded Age The Prince and the Pauper A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court The American Claimant Tom Sawyer Abroad Personal Recollections of Joan of Arc Pudd'nhead Wilson Tom Sawyer, Detective A Horse's Tale The Mysterious Stranger Novelettes A Double Barrelled Detective Story Those Extraordinary Twins The Recent Carnival of Crime in Connecticut The Stolen White Elephant The Man That Corrupted Hadleyburg Captain Stormfield's Visit to Heaven Short Story Collections The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County and Other Sketches Mark Twain's (Burlesque) Autobiography and First Romance Sketches New and Old Merry Tales The £1,000,000 Bank Note and Other New Stories The $30,000 Bequest and Other Stories The Curious Republic of Gondour and Other Whimsical Sketches Alonzo Fitz, and Other Stories Mark Twain's Library of Humor Other Stories Essays, Satires & Articles How to Tell a Story, and Other Essays What Is Man? And Other Essays Editorial Wild Oats Letters from the Earth Concerning the Jews To the Person Sitting in Darkness To My Missionary Critics Christian Science Queen Victoria's Jubilee Essays on Paul Bourget The Czar's Soliloquy King Leopold's Soliloquy Adam's Soliloquy Essays on Copyrights Other Essays Travel Books The Innocents Abroad A Tramp Abroad Roughing It Old Times on the Mississippi Life on the Mississippi Following the Equator Some Rambling Notes of an Idle Excursion Down the Rhône The Lost Napoleon Mark Twain's Notebook The Complete Speeches The Complete Letters Autobiography Biographies... Samuel Langhorne Clemens (1835-1910), better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer, humorist, entrepreneur, publisher and lecturer.