Download or read book The Best Ever Book of Filipino Jokes written by Mark Geoffrey Young and published by Createspace Independent Pub. This book was released on 2012-10-02 with total page 106 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If you've ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Libyan, Catholic, Irish, Mexican, Polish, Belgian, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Filipino jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Filipino Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The Best Ever Book of Filipino Jokes is so unoriginal; it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one Filipino joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many Filipino jokes; you won't know where to start. For example: Why do Filipinos wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An evil genie captured a Filipino and her two friends and banished them to the desert for a week. The genie allowed each person to bring one thing. The first friend brought a canteen so he wouldn't die of thirst. The second friend brought an umbrella to keep the sun off. The Filipino brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! *** Did you hear about the Filipino who wore two jackets when she painted the house? The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats." *** Why do Filipinos laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it. ***

Download or read book The Best Of Pinoy Jokes written by Various and published by Psicom Publishing Inc. This book was released on with total page 122 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Psicom Publishing Inc

Download or read book Jokes Collection 2 written by Tatay Jobo Elizes and published by Createspace Independent Pub. This book was released on 2013-06-20 with total page 110 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mental case - Psychiatrist: Let me analyze your problem, so perhaps you should start at the beginning. Patient: All right, in the beginning, I created the heavens and the earth. . . + + + Medicines - ala pinoy - Mga mister, pag meron karandaman si Misis, simple medicines lang ang kailangan: kispirin at yakapsul. Pag hindi pa gumaling, try biogesex. + + + Happiest Man - A couple lying in bed one night. The wife turn to the husband, smiled and said: "I'm going to make you the happiest man in the world." The man replied: Really? When are you leaving? + + + Smell - Ang sense of smell ng bulag ay very sensitive, dahil bulag siya at iyon lang ang kanyang talent. Pag dinala mo ang isang bulag sa wet market, alam niya ang smell ng bigas, ng mga prutas, at meat products. Pero pag dinala mo siya sa fish section, ang una niyang salita, ay "Good morning, Girls!"

Download or read book The Best Of Pinoy Jokes 2 written by Various and published by Psicom Publishing Inc. This book was released on with total page 122 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Psicom Publishing Inc

Download or read book Compilation of Filipino Jokes written by Nenette Bandong Dy-Liacco and published by . This book was released on 1994 with total page 102 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book The Greatest Collection of the Best Green Pilipino Jokes written by Arturo B. Rodriguez and published by Arturo B Rodriguez. This book was released on 2007-05 with total page 220 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book The Best Joke Book Period written by William Donohue and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-11 with total page 208 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Discover hundreds of jokes for every occasion! Why was the limbo dancer shocked when his wallet was stolen right out of his back pocket? Because he didn't think anyone could stoop so low. The ultimate collection of the world’s greatest funnies, The Best Joke Book (Period) keeps you laughing for hours on end. Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment. So whether you’re looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!

Download or read book The Funniest Joke Book Ever written by Editors of Portable Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-05-01 with total page 90 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 500 giggles, groans, and belly laughs! Kids can’t resist sharing jokes (even you try to stop them), so they always need a fresh supply. We’ve stuffed the pages of this little joke book with the funniest jokes we could find. Old favorites, new favorites, and a few festering stinkers, all guaranteed to make kids laugh out loud. You’ll find Q&A jokes, knock-knock jokes, riddles, and one-liners. And, of course, we’ve included entire chapters of those all-time kid-pleasers: elephant jokes, pirate jokes, and space jokes. Here’s a sampling: What's black and white, black and white, black and white? A penguin rolling down a hill. Why don’t zombies eat clowns? They taste funny. Why did the hen scold her chicks? They were using fowl language. What kind of books do skunks read? Best-smellers! How does Darth Vader like his toast? On the dark side. . . . and many more!

Download or read book The Best Of Clean Pilipino Jokes written by Arturo B. Rodriguez and published by Arturo B Rodriguez. This book was released on 2007-06 with total page 302 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book THE MAKING OF THE PORKCHOP DUO written by Romeo “Choppy” Vargas and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2011-11-21 with total page 103 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This memoir paints a nostalgic portrait of the life and times of the young Choppy as he stumbled upon Porky, together creating the legendary comic tandem in the Philippines called Porkchop Duo. For thirty years, the Porkchop Duo entertained generations of Filipinos with their iconic brand of stand-up comedy, travelling to 34 countries as “Showbiz Ambassadors of Good Will” and bringing laughter and fun to countless homesick Overseas Filipino Workers across the world. Told with unyielding candor and wit, Choppy recounts his days: from being a poor Tondo boy in between jobs to make a living, a youth leader keeping a dual personality to ironically conceal his shenanigans, to a young family man winning over his personal battles—inspirations that were to become materials for their much-celebrated repertoire of rib-tickling jokes. Choppy gives us a glimpse of the landscape of the Philippine stand-up comedy, how they found their way in, and broke new grounds. He reveals how they peddled an epic idea that would make them pioneers of comedy albums in the Philippines, eventually making stand-up comedy a household name for entertainment. Then he tells a moving story of grief, when his father, and shortly his partner, Porky, died, and tells how he unremittingly continues the legacy of the Porkchop Duo despite the odds. This unprecedented Autobiographical Joke Book packed with almost 100 jokes will surely take you back to the Porkchop Duo’s world-renowned performances.

Download or read book Jolly Jokes for Older Folks written by Bob Phillips and published by Harvest House Publishers. This book was released on 2007-04-01 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Bestselling author Bob Phillips has compiled yet another great collection of quirky quips and zany zingers that will charm and delight the young-at-heart and everyone who appreciates a little laughter in their lives. Stories of wacky waiters, loony lawyers, and daffy doctors will entertain readers while providing conversation starters for coffee or other get-togethers. An exasperated salesman abandoned his car in a no-parking zone and left this note: "I've circled this block 20 times. I have an appointment and must keep it or lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses." Upon returning, he found this note: "I've circled this block 20 years. If I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation." Patient: Doctor, doctor, I have a serious memory problem. I can't remember a thing. Doctor: How long have you had this problem? Patient: What problem? Alphabetized so readers can find just the right joke to suit their fancy, Jolly Jokes for Older Folks provides lighthearted moments for everyone who's been around long enough to laugh at themselves and others.

Download or read book Mixed Plate written by Jo Koy and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2021-03-23 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A stunning, hilarious memoir from beloved comedian Jo Koy, “far and away one of the funniest people out there” (Chelsea Handler). Mixed Plate illuminates the burning drive and unique humor that make Jo Koy one of today’s most successful comedians. Includes never-before-seen photos. Well guys, here it is—my story. A funny, sad, at times pathetic but also kick-ass tale of how a half-Filipino, half-white kid whose mom thought (and still thinks) his career goal was to become a clown became a success. Not an overnight success, because that would have made for a really short read, but an All-American success who could give my immigrant mom the kind of life she hoped for when she came to this country, and my son the kind of life I wished I’d had as a kid. With all the details of what it felt like to get the doors closed in my face, to grind it out on the road with my arsenal of dick jokes, and how my career finally took off once I embraced the craziness of my family, which I always thought was uniquely Filipino but turns out is as universal as it gets. In this book, I’ll take you behind the mic, behind the curtain—OK, way behind it. From growing up with a mom who made me dance like Michael Jackson at the Knights of Columbus, to some real dark stuff, the stuff we don’t talk about often enough as immigrants. Mental health, poverty, drinking. And show you the path to my American Dream. Which was paved with a lot of failure, department store raffle tickets to win free color televisions, bad jokes, old VHS tapes, a motorcycle my mom probably still hates, the only college final I aced (wasn’t math), and getting my first laugh on stage. There’s photo evidence of it all here, too. In this book, I get serious about my funny. And I want to make you laugh a little while I do it. I’m like Hawaii’s favorite lunch—the mixed plate. Little bit of this, a little bit of that. My book Mixed Plate is too.

Download or read book Jokelopedia written by Ilana Weitzman and published by Workman Publishing. This book was released on 2006-01-01 with total page 292 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Presents a compendium of jokes, riddles, knock-knock jokes, and puns for any occasion, and includes brief blurbs about comedians and successful comedic shows.

Download or read book The best of PinoyJokes net written by and published by . This book was released on 2004 with total page 119 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book A Spell for Chameleon The Parallel Edition Simplified written by Piers Anthony and published by Del Rey. This book was released on 2012-02-14 with total page 358 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Piers Anthony’s bestselling Xanth series is one of the cornerstones of fantasy, a lively and whimsical interpretation of a genre often criticized for taking itself too seriously. Anthony’s first Xanth novel, A Spell for Chameleon, was initially edited to target a more traditional audience. Now, in an eBook exclusive, A Spell for Chameleon has been reworked line by line—its language matching the simpler, playful way with words that made Piers Anthony an enduring fan favorite. Xanth is an enchanted land where magic rules, a land of centaurs and dragons and basilisks where every citizen has a unique spell to call their own. For Bink of North Village, however, Xanth is no fairy tale. He alone has no magic. And unless he gets some—and fast!—he will be exiled. Forever. But the Good Magician Humfrey is convinced that Bink does indeed have magic. In fact, both Beauregard the genie and the magic wall chart insist that Bink has magic as powerful as any possessed by the King, the Good Magician Humfrey, or even the Evil Magician Trent. Be that as it may, no one can fathom the nature of Bink’s very special magic. This is even worse than having no magic at all . . . and he still faces exile!

Download or read book The Funniest Grossest Joke Book Ever written by Editors of Portable Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-10-17 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Make your friends giggle, guffaw, and groan with disgust at over 900 jokes in this massive volume that combines two hilarious books in one. It’s a 2-for-1 of epic proportions. This book combines our two bestselling kids’ joke books: The Funniest Joke Book Ever! and The Grossest Joke Book Ever! Do you know a kid who likes Q&A jokes, knock-knocks, puns, riddles, or one-liners? Of course you do! This collection has all that and more—over 900 jokes—actually. Perfect for boys or girls, it spans all kid-friendly topics, including fairy tales, animals, monsters, and disgusting jokes that’ll make them (and you) want to barf. They’ll laugh out loud at zingers like: Q: What do you call a cow with a twitch? A: Beef jerky! Q: Do zombies eat candy with their fingers? A: No, they eat the fingers separately. Q: What kind of life was found on Pluto? A: Fleas! And many more!

Download or read book Stop Me If You ve Heard This A History and Philosophy of Jokes written by Jim Holt and published by W. W. Norton & Company. This book was released on 2008-07-17 with total page 160 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Finally I understand what it is I’ve been laughing at all these years.”—Jimmy Kimmel From the best-selling author of Why Does the World Exist? comes this outrageous, uproarious compendium of absurdity, filth, racy paradox, and gratuitous offensiveness—just the kind of mature philosophical reflection readers have come to expect from the ever-entertaining Jim Holt. Indeed, Stop Me If You’ve Heard This is the first book to trace the evolution of the joke all the way from the standup comics of ancient Athens to the comedy-club Seinfelds of today. After exploring humor’s history in Part One, Holt delves into philosophy in Part Two: Wall Street jokes; jokes about rednecks and atheists, bulimics and politicians; jokes you missed if you didn’t go to a Catholic girls’ school; jokes about logic and existence itself . . . all became fodder for the grand theories of Aristotle, Kant, Freud, and Wittgenstein in this heady mix of the high and low, of the ribald and profound, from America’s most beloved philosophical pundit.