Download or read book Santa Steps Out written by Robert Devereaux and published by Deadite Press. This book was released on 2011-11 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sex, Death, and Santa Claus ... His generosity is legendary. He has a devoted wife, a crack team of sky-borne reindeer, hordes of industrious elves, and the love of good little boys and girls around the globe. But what unholy desires now propel him into the lascivious clutches of a certain fairy? And who was he before the sleigh and workshop, in times forgotten? ... She munches on molars, summons drowned sailors to her pleasure, and recalls, sharp as a pinprick, her life as the most savage of ash nymphs. Why then is she stuck, night after night, hovering above pillows to leave coins for gap-toothed brats? More important, how quickly can she captivate the jolly old elf to the north? ... He's huge, fluffy, lonesome, and unbearably horny. On his Easter rounds, he contrives, as often as possible, to get a grip on himself and peer into interesting bedrooms. But who in the world will throw him down and ravage him as the lovers under his gaze ravage one another? ... Deadite Press is proud to bring back the ultimate erotic Christmas story from Robert Devereaux

Download or read book Are You Grumpy Santa written by Gregg Spiridellis and published by Hyperion Books for Children. This book was released on 2008-09-16 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sometimes even the merriest, most cheerful guy on the planet wakes up on the wrong side of the bed… First, after a restless night due to Mrs. Claus's snoring, Santa awakes on Christmas morning and stubs his toe. Then the elves shrink his suit, his sleigh gets buried in a snowdrift, and he gets stuck in a chimney. Santa’s had just about enough! But just in the nick of time, he discovers a very special gift of milk and cookies waiting for him. As he munches on the delicious snack, Santa's remembers what Christmas is all about—the gift of love—and, merrily, his grumpies melt away. Now available as a board book, this merrily irreverent Yuletide story, brought to life by Gregg and Evan Spiridellis, will tickle funny bones and touch hearts far and wide.

Download or read book Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes written by Robert Devereaux and published by Deadite Press. This book was released on 2011-11 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "I wish I could hope to ever attain one-thousandth the perversity of Robert Devereaux's toenail clippings." -Poppy Z. Brite Santa Claus is back. And flying beside him is Wendy, his freshly minted stepdaughter, who can peer into the future of selected children and offer them glimpses of the wonders ahead. But with that power come horrific visions of the turmoil and trouble the less fortunate among them are fated to suffer. Can Wendy and her stepfather prevent the suicide of Jamie Stratton in his teen years, as he grows up gay in a homophobic household and community? God the Father grants them three Thanksgiving visits to Jamie's tormentors, in hopes of bringing about a change of heart in them and eliminating their ingrained prejudices. Beyond the challenge of rescuing one precious child lies the far more daunting task of expunging entirely this brand of bigotry from the human race, as Santa and Wendy strive to remake the world in compassion and generosity. Along the way, they enlist the aid of the Easter Bunny, a highly persuasive fellow indeed. But the Tooth Fairy and her loathsome imps are hell-bent on doing all they can to stop Santa and Wendy-nay, to heighten mortal fear and hatred of anyone whose orientation strays even the slightest from the norm.

Download or read book Santa Claus Doesn t Mop Floors Adventures of the Bailey School Kids 3 written by Debbie Dadey and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2021-12-07 with total page 61 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The hugely popular early chapter book series re-emerges -- now in e-book! The kids in the third grade at Bailey Elementary are so hard to handle that all of their teachers have quit. But their new teacher, Mrs. Jeepers, is different to say the least. She's just moved from the Transylvanian Alps and she seems to have some strange powers that help her deal with these mischief-makers. Her methods may be a little unconventional, but, then again, Mrs. Jeepers may be just what the Bailey School kids need.

Download or read book Santa Claus Saves the World written by Robert Devereaux and published by Deadite Press. This book was released on 2013-12-01 with total page 176 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's that time of year again - when Santa Claus has to save the world! After conquering the homophobes, Santa Claus believes that humans can finally be nice instead of naughty. But dark forces from across history and mythology have other plans. One couple and their disintegrating marriage may just cause a chain reaction that will plunge the world into darkness and terror. So Santa and his pals begin an adventure from the North Pole to the Heaven and Hades to save the soul of humanity. Robert Devereaux returns once again to the Santa Mythos that made him an underground horror fan favorite. The sequel to "Santa Steps Out" and "Santa Claus Conquers the Homophobes" combines pagan gods with holiday cheer and a large dose of sex and violence. "Santa Claus Saves the World" is a present for sickos of all-ages!

Download or read book How Santa Really Works written by Alan Snow and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2007-10-02 with total page 54 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Santa Claus has a complicated and sophisticated Christmas operation, which includes the training of and numerous jobs for his elves to the celebrations at his own Christmas Day party.

Download or read book Santa s God written by Neale Donald Walsch and published by Emnin Books. This book was released on 2008-12 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Santa certainly had some good answers, and Melinda was almost out of questions. But then she remembered the most important question of all. It was a question she'd always wanted answered. 'Santa, ' she began ... 'Who is the real God?'"--Page 4 of cover

Download or read book Dear Santa Please Come to the 19th Floor written by Yin and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2011-09-29 with total page 44 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Willy wants to cheer his best friend, Carlos, up. And what better way to do so than a Christmas visit from Santa Claus himself? But when Santa answers Willy's e-mail pleading with him to visit the 19th floor of their inner-city apartment building, he doesn't quite know what is in store for him. Yin and Chris Soentpiet, the author-illustrator pair who created the ALA notable Coolies, bring us a heartwarming and modern Christmas story with the lush illustrations that Soentpiet fans have come to love.

Download or read book How to Catch Santa written by Jean Reagan and published by Knopf Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2018-09-11 with total page 26 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A #1 New York Times bestseller and Christmas must-read from the creators of the laugh-out-loud bestsellers How to Babysit a Grandpa and How to Babysit a Grandma! After waiting for days and days and days, it’s finally Christmas Eve. And that’s when you can try to catch Santa.... Two sibling narrators give clever tips for “catching” Santa (be crafty! be clever! be gentle!) on Christmas Eve in this delightful and hilarious holiday offering, written in a fun instructional style. Filled with humor and warmth, this is a jolly read-aloud for the whole family to enjoy! And don't miss Jean Reagan and Lee Wildish's How to Raise a Mom and How to Surprise a Dad! “A new hit this year is How to Catch Santa. . . . The picture book offers lighthearted tips on how kids can steal a glimpse of Mr. Elusive, aka Santa. . . .” —USA Today

Download or read book The Santa Suit written by Mary Kay Andrews and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2021-09-28 with total page 147 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From Mary Kay Andrews, the New York Times bestselling author of Hello, Summer, comes a novella celebrating the magic of Christmas and second chances in The Santa Suit. When newly-divorced Ivy Perkins buys an old farmhouse sight unseen, she is definitely looking for a change in her life. The Four Roses, as the farmhouse is called, is a labor of love—but Ivy didn't bargain on just how much labor. The previous family left so much furniture and so much junk, that it's a full-time job sorting through all of it. At the top of a closet, Ivy finds an old Santa suit—beautifully made and decades old. In the pocket of a suit she finds a note written in a childish hand: it's from a little girl who has one Christmas wish, and that is for her father to return home from the war. This discovery sets Ivy off on a mission. Who wrote the note? Did the man ever come home? What mysteries did the Rose family hold? Ivy's quest brings her into the community, at a time when all she wanted to do was be left alone and nurse her wounds. But the magic of Christmas makes miracles happen, and Ivy just might find more than she ever thought possible: a welcoming town, a family reunited, a mystery solved, and a second chance at love.

Download or read book Secret Agent Santa written by Carol Ericson and published by Harlequin. This book was released on 2015-11-01 with total page 221 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Christmas was supposed to be about joy and hope…not about thwarting terrorist plots Most covert agents weren't blessed with long careers. Mike Becker wasn't like most agents. On the cusp of early retirement, he's given one final assignment: babysit a single mother with a reputation for coming up with conspiracy theories. Except the bullets flying Claire Chadwick's way can't be dismissed. Now Mike will do anything to protect her and her son, and uncover the truth. A truth that places them at the center of a terrorist attack on Christmas Day. Mike's career may be coming to a blazing finish, but in this woman he finally has a shot at the redemption that's eluded him for so long.

Download or read book When Santa Learned the Gospel written by Simon Camilleri and published by . This book was released on 2017-07-22 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An original Christmas fable about when Santa first learns about Jesus' message of grace.Unexpectedly, Santa finds himself on a his own spiritual and philosophical journey full of humour, self-reflection, wonder and redemption.Complemented by the beautiful and engaging illustrations of Matt Boutros, this book hopes to inspire many a conversation about faith, philosophy and the messages of Christmas, between adults and children alike.

Download or read book Santa Wore Leathers Wild Heat Book 1 written by Vonnie Davis and published by HarperCollins UK. This book was released on 2013-11-28 with total page 121 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A perfect holiday treat for fans of Lori Wilde, Jennifer Ryan and Penelope Bloom! Take one man-shy reporter, a gorgeous ex-Navy SEAL turned firefighter, add in a thong-stealing dog... and Christmas will never be the same again!

Download or read book Santa s Son written by David S. Scott and published by Createspace Independent Publishing Platform. This book was released on 2016-12-22 with total page 100 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: What do you think of when you picture elves? Could they be real? What about other fantasy beings? What about... Santa Claus? Shawn is accustomed to living life the way he wants to. He has no responsibilities, no one to answer to. He comes and goes as he pleases, traveling the world, looking for fulfillment. But all that is about to change... Santa's sick and getting old. This year, he'll be replaced by his son. Will you be on the naughty list?

Download or read book Santa Steps Out written by Robert Devereaux and published by Leisure Books. This book was released on 2000 with total page 380 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Santa Claus has always portrayed one jolly image to the world. But what long forgotten, unholy urges are awakening in Santa's mind? Who was he before, and what will he become now? What is driving him into the evil clutches of a certain fairy? Will Christmas survive?

Download or read book The Santa Claus Girl written by Patricia P. Goodin and published by . This book was released on 2020-10-20 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Yes, Virginia, There Is A Santa Claus"Virginia grew up.Yes, THAT Virginia-who became a teacher-encouraging students through the Great Depression, World War II, and the Polio epidemic. "The Santa Claus Girl," a novel drawn from true events, imagines Virginia's far-reaching influence and her exceptional gift of inspiration. Set in New York City, December 1952, the story uncovers how a remarkable woman sparks a band of humble do-gooders to overcome the odds stacked against them-and reach for an extraordinary goal. Uplifting, inspirational story in a historical fiction book about the "Yes, Virginia, There Is A Santa Claus" girl who eventually became the principal of a New York hospital school during the Polio Epidemic in the early 50s.

Download or read book It s Not Easy Being Santa written by Pragya Tomar and published by . This book was released on 2019-11-27 with total page 35 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Ever wonder what Santa's job is like?" "Wishes do come true..." It's Christmas eve and Bug accidentally finds a stack of letters that kids have written to Santa. Santa won't receive the letters in time, so Bug wishes on a shooting star: "I WISH I WERE SANTA!" His wish is granted and he gets a surprise visit from his considerate team of reindeer. Ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas! A season of Christmas, of sharing our love. A season of blessings, from Heaven above. A season of friendships, of warmth, and good cheer. A season of greetings, for the coming new year. BUY the print copy now and the eBook is FREE!