Download or read book Merry Fucking Christmas written by Joe Movick and published by . This book was released on 2020-11-19 with total page 130 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Christmas is a time of family, stress, love, wanting, resentment, and occasional violence.It's tradition.Frozen turkeys, drunk in-laws, gifts that bite, Santa breaking and entering, death, infidelity?Six short comedies to help you wind down during the holidays.

Download or read book Denis Leary s Merry F in Christmas written by Denis Leary and published by Running Press Adult. This book was released on 2012-10-30 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For everyone who loves the holidays - and those of us who can't wait until they're over - Denis Leary has a special gift this season: Merry F***in' Christmas. This adult parody of a children's book, in the vein of Go The Fuck To Sleep, takes aim at bad presents, drunk Santas, boring relatives, ugly sweaters, greedy kids and all the other things that make December such a pain in the ass. Just like he did in The Ref - the cult classic Christmas film that skewers dysfunctional families - Denis will have you laughing out loud about just how unhappy the holidays can be.

Download or read book Sixty Five Hours written by N.R. Walker and published by BlueHeart Press. This book was released on 2020-08-06 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Cameron Fletcher and Lucas Hensley are advertising executives who have Sixty Five Hours to pull together the campaign of their careers. Sixty Five Hours to get along. Sixty Five Hours to not kill each other. Sixty Five Hours to fall in love. ** First published in 2012. New Cover in 2019 - No additional content has been added.

Download or read book Hyperbole and a Half written by Allie Brosh and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-10-29 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!

Download or read book Merry Christmas Amelia Bedelia written by Peggy Parish and published by Harper Collins. This book was released on 2002-10-01 with total page 68 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's Christmas Eve, and Amelia Bedelia has to get the Rogers house ready for a visit from Aunt Myra. But with Amelia Bedelia in charge, this Christmas will be one of the funniest ever!

Download or read book Merry Christmas You Fucking Cunt written by Happiness Your Happiness Your Own Way and published by . This book was released on 2019-10-30 with total page 95 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Give this Christmas a funny journal instead of those boring cards, because well who doesn't like to write them feelings off (or a shit list or two). This is the sassy Christmas gift you can wrap up and give to your "dead inside" coworker, aunt with humor or your tired ass girl. You will get a festive interior with holiday quotes (and some swearing). Click on "look inside" to check it out yourself. 95 pages of shit 6" x 9" It will even make that boring ass uncle laugh

Download or read book Twelve Nights at Rotter House written by J.W. Ocker and published by Turner Publishing Company. This book was released on 2019-10-29 with total page 190 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Felix Allsey is a travel writer with a keen eye for the paranormal, and he’s carved out a unique, if only slightly lucrative, niche for himself in nonfiction; he writes travelogues of the country’s most haunted places, after haunting them himself. When he convinces the owner of the infamous Rotterdam Mansion to let him stay on the premises for 13 nights, he believes he’s finally found the location that will bring him a bestseller. As with his other gigs, he sets rules for himself: no leaving the house for any reason, refrain from outside contact, and sleep during the day. When Thomas Ruth, Felix's oldest friend and fellow horror film obsessive, joins him on the project, the two dance around a recent and unspeakably painful rough-patch in their friendship, but eventually fall into their old rhythms of dark humor and movie trivia. That’s when things start going wrong: screams from upstairs, figures in the thresholds, and more than what should be in any basement. Felix realizes the book he’s writing, and his very state of mind, is tilting from nonfiction into all out horror, and the shocking climax answers a question that’s been staring these men in the face all along: In Rotter House, who’s haunting who?

Download or read book Merry Inkmas written by Talia Hibbert and published by Nixon House. This book was released on 2017-12-01 with total page 189 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Cash Evans knows exactly what he wants for Christmas. Too bad he can’t have her. The infamous tattoo artist’s been watching geeky Bailey Cooper for months, but that’s all he’ll ever do: watch. Bailey’s too sweet, too smart, too good for the likes of him, and he knows it. So Cash keeps his distance… until a Christmas miracle makes him Bailey’s boss. Socially awkward Bailey learned long ago that men just aren’t worth the hassle. Take her new boss, Cash: he’s a brooding beast who avoids her like the plague, but he also fixes her plumbing, helps the homeless, and offers Bailey a place to stay for Christmas. She’s never met anyone so confusing—or so impossible to resist. And the more Bailey learns about Cash and his demons, the more she thinks it’s time to stop fighting. Warning: this 50,000-word holiday romance features an alphamellow bad boy hero, a strong, geeky heroine, a naughty office flirtation, and a guaranteed happily-ever-after. There’s no cheating and no cliff-hanger. Enjoy!

Download or read book There s Only One Bed at Christmas written by Jackie Lau and published by Jackie Lau Books. This book was released on 2021-12-01 with total page 334 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Three Christmas novellas to heat up the holidays! Her Pretend Christmas Date Julie Tam is home for Christmas with her starchy fake boyfriend. Though Tom Yeung might be irritating, he’s the perfect guy to impress her parents. But as they spend more time together—skating, building gingerbread houses, and sharing a bed—Julie starts wishing the holiday weekend would never end… One Bed for Christmas Wes Cheng has had a crush on his friend Caitlin Ng for over a decade, but he knows he’s not her type. She’s a CEO, and he dances in an inflatable T-Rex costume. However, when a snowstorm knocks out her power, she ends up staying at his small apartment for Christmas. Being so close to her is dangerous for his heart…or could it lead to the romance he desires? A Second Chance Road Trip for Christmas Greg Wong doesn’t appreciate being forced to drive Tasha Edwards, the first woman he ever loved, back to their hometown for the holidays. And he really doesn’t appreciate it when a snowstorm forces them to spend a night in an unheated motel room with only one bed. But nothing’s going to happen…right? Jackie Lau writes soft and steamy romances with Asian characters, all set in Canada. KEYWORDS: Christmas romance box set, holiday romance, rom-com, romantic comedy, lighthearted contemporary romance, cozy vibes, forced proximity, steamy romance, spicy romance, Canadian romance, Toronto, Asian hero

Download or read book Murder on the Christmas Express written by Alexandra Benedict and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2023-10-03 with total page 269 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Strong prose and a bevy of plausible suspects keep things intriguing. Readers willing to embrace this Christmas story's jagged edges are in for a ripping mystery."— Publishers Weekly All aboard, but beware! Passengers who sleep on this train may never wake up. In the early hours of Christmas Eve, the sleeper train from London to the Highlands derails, along with the festive plans of its travelers. With the train buried in snow in the middle of nowhere, the passengers have only each other, and not all of them will reach their holiday celebrations. As a killer tries to pick passengers off one by one, former Met Detective Roz Parker can't resist one last investigation, but murder in a locked room is a formidable puzzle for even the most seasoned investigator. As accusations begin to fly, the group of travelers fractures and unexpected alliances form. Can Roz find the culprit before anyone else is lost?

Download or read book A Dream Man Christmas written by J.D. Walker and published by JMS Books LLC. This book was released on 2015-12-08 with total page 19 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Michael Stein has been with Chris Bolster -- his Mr. Muscles -- for over a year. His dream man come to life, Michael is happy enough with their relationship. Except he and Chris only see each other once a month due to Chris's busy schedule, and Michael misses him desperately when he’s away. And now, with Christmas right around the corner, Michael is pouting. Unofficially. Early on Christmas Eve morning, Chris informs Michael via Skype that he might not make it home in time for the holiday. As if that isn’t bad enough, Chris teases him with a special surprise he’ll be bringing with him. Not knowing what’s coming, Michael prepares for the holiday and hopes for the best. When Chris manages to make it home on December 25th with the Best. Gift. Ever!, Michael knows this Christmas Day will be one to remember, for always.

Download or read book The Chocolate Lovers Christmas written by Carole Matthews and published by Sphere. This book was released on 2015-08-13 with total page 480 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Christmas is just around the corner but the women of The Chocolate Lovers' Club have more to worry about than present shopping . . . Lucy loves running Chocolate Heaven but she hasn't spent time with her boyfriend, Aiden, in weeks. And then her ex-fiance turns up and things become even more complicated. Nadia hasn't let herself get close to a man in a long time, yet she can't help feeling drawn to Jacob. Will he be her last chance for a happy ending? Chantal and her husband, Ted, are besotted with their baby daughter Lana - but she's not sure that's enough to base a marriage on. Autumn is dealing with a tragedy that has hit too close to home. But when she doesn't get the support she needs from her fiance, will she look elsewhere for comfort? Can friendship overcome all in . . . The Chocolate Lovers' Christmas.

Download or read book Death Comes For Christmas written by P.J. Donison and published by Pamela JP Donison. This book was released on 2022-03-02 with total page 383 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A beloved aunt dies mysteriously. Fentanyl shows up in all the wrong places. Can a burned out lawyer with a drinking problem figure out who killed Auntie Freda? Camelia Belmont is struggling to manage a stressful job, an escalating anxiety disorder, and a few too many cocktails. She just needs a nice, quiet family holiday back in Saskatchewan, away from her demanding law practice and a very unhappy boss to get her head straight. But when her beloved Auntie Freda dies suddenly, the Phoenix attorney is determined to find the killer. As she digs into the circumstances leading up to her aunt’s death, Camelia discovers a link to a local drug dealer and an exploding opioid crisis. Despite scanty evidence, a keen RCMP retiree, and uncooperative relatives, Camelia is convinced the killer is one of their own. Tracking down clues despite their protests, Camelia worries her tactics could seriously alienate her closest family members, including her husband. Can she discover what happened before the RCMP take over and the whole mess blows up in her face? Death Comes for Christmas is the first book in the suspenseful Camelia Belmont Murder Mystery series and an Origin Story. If you like soft-boiled whodunnits with a smart female sleuth, true-to-life characters, and dark insights into the opioid epidemic, you’ll love PJ Donison’s debut literary mystery. A sudden death. A deadly toxic drug. A squabbling family. Can Camelia Belmont find out who really killed Auntie Freda?

Download or read book An Unexpected Christmas written by Shannon Richard and published by NYLA. This book was released on 2018-12-04 with total page 270 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: BAH-FREAKING-HUMBUG Adele James’s favorite time of year has always been Christmas, but this year she’s in no mood for the holiday season. Thanks to her famous A-list actor boyfriend cheating on her! Now that her photo is splashed all over TV, the internet, and tabloids her number one goal is to get away. She heads to her family’s cabin to be alone, but there’s another occupant when she arrives: none other than the frustratingly sexy Jace Kilpatrick... the man she’s been avoiding falling in love with for the past six years. Jace Kilpatrick has never been the biggest holiday guy, and after three months of the NHL being on lockout, celebrating is low on his priority list. Getting the keys to his best friend’s family cabin was supposed to be about being alone. But those plans are foiled by Adele James who brings the mother of all snowstorms with her. Adele is gorgeous, funny, and fiery, but she’s also his best friend’s sister, aka, completely off limits. But when the cabin loses power in the middle of the storm, Jace forgets the rules and spends the Christmas days and nights with Adele wrapped in his arms. Once the snow thaws, they’ll call things off, no harm, no foul... if they can agree to keep their hearts out of the equation.

Download or read book Flaming Christmas Decorations written by Steven Farkas and published by Lulu.com. This book was released on 2011-02-21 with total page 40 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A rollicking roller coaster of fun and laughs as a young family run into all kinds of problems when they move into their new house just one week before Chistmas. If you like Christmas Vacation, you'll love Flaming Christmas Decorations!!

Download or read book A Country Christmas written by Veronica Henry and published by Orion. This book was released on 2015-11-19 with total page 383 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Escape to the country this Christmas in this delightful festive read from bestselling author Veronica Henry. 'As fruity as a mince pie' SUNDAY EXPRESS Christmas is coming to Honeycote House and Lucy Liddiard is busy whipping up a feast of festive treats (all with an extra dash of brandy!) for her nearest and dearest. She knows this year's celebrations need to be extra special - their beloved Cotswolds brewery is struggling and Lucy is sure that the secret her husband Mickey is hiding isn't a diamond necklace in her stocking... As the scent of cinnamon fills the air and the glamorous guests start to arrive, Lucy suspects there might be a few more secrets waiting underneath the Christmas tree... It's certainly going to be a holiday to remember! Irresistibly good fun and bursting with heart, A Country Christmas is the first book in the Honeycote series, followed by A Country Life and A Country Wedding. ** This book was originally published as 'Honeycote' ** Your favourite authors love Veronica Henry! 'A blissful escape' SARAH MORGAN 'The most uplifting getaway' LUCY DIAMOND 'Veronica Henry writes like a dream' JILL MANSELL 'Irresistibly romantic. I adored it' PHILLIPA ASHLEY 'A delicious, dreamy, joy of a book' LIBBY PAGE 'The perfect weekend read' FANNY BLAKE

Download or read book Return to Christmas written by Anne Stuart and published by Impeccably Demure Press. This book was released on 2019-11-15 with total page 308 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Madison Simcoe has had enough. She’s a cold, lonely workaholic who’s been harassed one too many times by a fellow worker, it’s Christmas and the spirit is gone, and she feels like a stranger in her own life. A little retail therapy should cheer her up. Macy’s is huge, a giant store full of wonders, and Madison’s happy place. So when she decides to indulge herself, pushing through the big doors on a cold afternoon in December, she’s not expecting to suddenly find herself in 1947, unable to leave the huge building. And she’s certainly not expecting to find incredibly hot Johnny Larsen, former Army spy during WWII, with a buttload of PTSD, artistic brilliance, and bad attitude, looking out for her. Bad things happen, even at Christmas, but there’s magic in the air, and Madison is inconveniently in love with a man who must be long dead. Surely there’s a happy ending among the mistletoe and holly?