Download or read book People I Want to Punch in the Throat written by Jen Mann and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2014-09-09 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NATIONAL BESTSELLER • A debut collection of witty, biting essays laced with a surprising warmth, from Jen Mann, the writer behind the popular blog People I Want to Punch in the Throat People I want to punch in the throat: • anyone who feels the need to bling her washer and dryer • humblebraggers • people who treat their pets like children Jen Mann doesn’t have a filter, which sometimes gets her in trouble with her neighbors, her fellow PTA moms, and that one woman who tried to sell her sex toys at a home shopping party. Known for her hilariously acerbic observations on her blog, People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Mann now brings her sharp wit to bear on suburban life, marriage, and motherhood in this laugh-out-loud collection of essays. From the politics of joining a play group, to the thrill of mothers’ night out at the gun range, to the rewards of your most meaningful relationship (the one you have with your cleaning lady), nothing is sacred or off-limits. So the next time you find yourself wearing fuzzy bunny pajamas in the school carpool line or accidentally stuck at a co-worker’s swingers party, just think, What would Jen Mann do? Or better yet, buy her book. Praise for People I Want to Punch in the Throat “People I Want to Punch in the Throat is so good that it’ll make you want to adopt all the cats in the world. I’m not sure about the correlation, but it’s that good. It should come with a warning.”—Jenny Lawson, author of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened “Jen Mann has an amazing way of telling stories that will make you cringe and burst out laughing at the same time. From swinger parties to racist toddlers, she makes the suburbs unbelievably funny.”—Karen Alpert, author of I Heart My Little A-Holes “Jen Mann says the things we’re all too afraid to say. Her honest and hilarious writing style reminds me of David Sedaris and Tina Fey.”—Robin O’Bryant, author of Ketchup Is a Vegetable: And Other Lies Moms Tell Themselves “Jen Mann’s shrewd and unrelenting assault on the absurdity of suburban life is an honest peek into the occasional nightmare that is part of living the American dream. I love Jen. I wish she was my neighbor. It’s so refreshing to know that I’m not the only one who wants to punch almost everyone in the f***ing throat.”—Nicole Knepper, author of Moms Who Drink And Swear

Download or read book The Elf on the Shelf written by Carol V. Aebersold and published by . This book was released on 2012-02-01 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Elf on the Shelf: A Christmas Tradition is an activity the entire family will enjoy. Based on the tradition Carol Aebersold began with her family in the 1970s, this cleverly rhymed children's book explains that Santa knows who is naughty and/or nice because he sends a scout elf to every home. During the holiday season, the elf watches children by day and reports to Santa each night. When children awake, the elf has returned from the North Pole and can be found hiding in a different location. This activity allows The Elf on the Shelf to become a delightful hide-and-seek game.

Download or read book Little Polar Bears written by Valerie Guidoux and published by Gareth Stevens Publishing LLLP. This book was released on 2005-12-15 with total page 28 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Describes the physical aspects and social behavior of polar bears from birth to adulthood.

Download or read book Will You Be My Friend written by Sam McBratney and published by Candlewick Press. This book was released on 2024-10-15 with total page 31 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From legendary author and illustrator duo Sam McBratney and Anita Jeram comes the delightful sequel to the heartwarming picture book classic Guess How Much I Love You. Little Nutbrown Hare is out exploring on his own. Off he hops along the path and through the grass until he reaches Cloudy Mountain, where something extraordinary happens: he discovers a new friend! Now the fun can really begin.Twenty-five years after we met the Nutbrown Hares, this enchanting new tale about friendship is bound to capture the hearts of Guess How Much I Love You fans—and everyone else—the world over.

Download or read book Wee Wonderfuls written by Hillary Lang and published by Harry N. Abrams. This book was released on 2013-03-19 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Illustrated, step-by-step instructions for 24 soft dolls, for beginner to advanced sewers.

Download or read book Give a Sh t written by Ashlee Piper and published by Running Press Adult. This book was released on 2018-06-26 with total page 282 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "The time for stepping up and protecting our planet is now. And this book is an easy, enjoyable place to start." -- Moby It's time to put your good intentions into action. It's time to give a shit -- about your health, your footprint, and your planet. Give a Sh*t guides you through the transition to a kinder, healthier, more conscious, and sustainable life like no book has done before. With a humorous and nonjudgmental tone, savvy eco-friendly lifestyle expert Ashlee Piper walks you through easy-but-impactful shifts anyone can make to live and be better every damn day: In your home - Room-by-room guidance and tactics for a chic, affordable, sustainable living space, no matter where or how you live In the kitchen - 20+ unfussy, quick, and delicious plant-based recipes for every life occasion, from pantry staples like White Witch Almond Milk to exciting everyday fare like Walnut Chorizo Tostadas to kick-ass desserts like Jamocha Silk Pie In your closet - Advice for building a polished, ethical wardrobe in a world of fast fashion In the mirror - Beauty and grooming tips and DIY products (from skin care to foundation to, ahem, ladytime provisions) that are safer, natural, cruelty-free, and, best of all, effective In the wild - How to maintain your values (and your moxie) at work, in your social life, and when abroad Give a Sh*t isn't a manual of restrictions -- it's a practical handbook that meets you where you are and finally harmonizes doing good with living well.

Download or read book Santa Mouse written by Michael Brown and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-10-05 with total page 15 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Originally published by Grosset & Dunlap"--Copyright page.

Download or read book The DIY Home Planner written by KariAnne Wood and published by Harvest House Publishers. This book was released on 2018-03-06 with total page 145 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Decorate Your Home like a Rock Star! Popular home decor blogger KariAnne Wood has created this delightful and inspiring home planner just for you. With her infectious joy and humor, KariAnne is there to hold your hand on the decorating road ahead. Infused with witty, simple, and can-do advice, The DIY Home Planner is packed with unique features to help you realize your decorating dreams: Convenient pockets to tuck paint chips, fabric samples, and more to keep you organized Charming illustrations, photos, and diagrams to inform and encourage you Unique style guides, decision trees, and reference guidelines to inspire confidence in every decorating decision Easy DIY projects to help you accessorize with personalized style Incredible extras in the back of the book, including three frameable prints to brighten up your wall decor Discover these and other amazing tips in every area of home décor from painted wall treatments to light fixtures to accessories to floors...and so much more!

Download or read book Blindsight written by Peter Watts and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2006-10-03 with total page 388 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hugo and Shirley Jackson award-winning Peter Watts stands on the cutting edge of hard SF with his acclaimed novel, Blindsight Two months since the stars fell... Two months of silence, while a world held its breath. Now some half-derelict space probe, sparking fitfully past Neptune's orbit, hears a whisper from the edge of the solar system: a faint signal sweeping the cosmos like a lighthouse beam. Whatever's out there isn't talking to us. It's talking to some distant star, perhaps. Or perhaps to something closer, something en route. So who do you send to force introductions with unknown and unknowable alien intellect that doesn't wish to be met? You send a linguist with multiple personalities, her brain surgically partitioned into separate, sentient processing cores. You send a biologist so radically interfaced with machinery that he sees x-rays and tastes ultrasound. You send a pacifist warrior in the faint hope she won't be needed. You send a monster to command them all, an extinct hominid predator once called vampire, recalled from the grave with the voodoo of recombinant genetics and the blood of sociopaths. And you send a synthesist—an informational topologist with half his mind gone—as an interface between here and there. Pray they can be trusted with the fate of a world. They may be more alien than the thing they've been sent to find. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

Download or read book Mommy Me Crocheted Hats written by Kristi Simpson and published by Stackpole Books. This book was released on 2014-04-01 with total page 146 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why should kids have all the fun when it comes to cute-as-a-button caps or fun and fanciful hats? And why can't little ones feel just like mom and dad with a fashionable newsboy visor or slouchy hat? In this delightful collection of 30 original patterns, everyone can get in on the fun.

Download or read book The Barrowfields written by Phillip Lewis and published by Hogarth. This book was released on 2017-03-07 with total page 370 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A richly textured coming-of-age story about fathers and sons, home and family, recalling classics by Thomas Wolfe and William Styron, by a powerful new voice in fiction Just before Henry Aster’s birth, his father—outsized literary ambition and pregnant wife in tow—reluctantly returns to the small Appalachian town in which he was raised and installs his young family in an immense house of iron and glass perched high on the side of a mountain. There, Henry grows up under the writing desk of this fiercely brilliant man. But when tragedy tips his father toward a fearsome unraveling, what was once a young son’s reverence is poisoned and Henry flees, not to return until years later when he, too, must go home again. Mythic in its sweep and mesmeric in its prose, THE BARROWFIELDS is a breathtaking debut about the darker side of devotion, the limits of forgiveness, and the reparative power of shared pasts. – SIBA Okra Pick

Download or read book But Where Do I Put the Couch written by Melissa Michaels and published by Harvest House Publishers. This book was released on 2019-09-10 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 101 Real Decorating FAQs Answered When you have a home decorating question, do you wish you had a team to consult? Now, you do! Home decor experts Melissa Michaels (The Inspired Room) and KariAnne Wood (Thistlewood Farms) answer 101 actual queries from readers like you. As Melissa and KariAnne help solve these everyday decorating dilemmas, you’ll learn more about… Getting Started What to do first, how to update your entire house, and decorate on a budget. Style and Trends How to find your personal decorating style, choose a timeless look, and make your home both kid and style friendly. The Major Elements Get foundational guidelines for flooring, wall décor, lighting, and more. Furniture and Space Planning How to place furniture properly, maximize open floor space, and redo rooms on a tight budget. Color, Paint, and Patterns Choose correct colors, learn paint basics, and express your creativity while avoiding clash. Organization Tame your junk drawer, declutter kitchen appliances, and manage the mess in a multipurpose room. Accessories and Styling Accessorize with confidence, showcase your favorite pieces, and own your style even while renting. If you’re unsure about any area of decorating, chances are the answers are inside this book. Melissa and KariAnne can help!

Download or read book Ashes of Sin and Stardust written by Lindsay Murray and published by Lindsay Murray. This book was released on with total page 627 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "I will destroy you." I have searched for her for over half my life. Every night, I see her face in my dreams. Every morning, I wake to those words seared into my mind. She'll be my everything, the thing I've been searching for, the thing to complete me. The one who will choose to sit at my feet and serve me... the one I will never let go. But when I find her... She's a smart-mouthed, annoying, obnoxious little brat. Alice Benson is nothing but snark, chaos, and glitter, all rolled up into a tattooed curvy little body made to drive me to sin. As hard as I try to avoid her, I can't get her out of my head. I can't stop watching her. I can't stop wanting her. But when she finally opens up to me... I realize destruction never tasted so sweet. This is an interconnected standalone in the AnchorX series. It takes place after Let's Play a Game. This book was originally published under the title How to Tame a Brat. The content of the book has not changed.

Download or read book Hack Your Cupboard written by Alyssa Wiegand and published by . This book was released on 2019 with total page 172 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Trying new recipes brings the risk of a hungry night at home; sticking to what you know can get boring. What's a lazy, cash-strapped chef to do?!? Wiegand and Carreon show that you can grab whatever is handy, head to your pantry, and get to work! From the family pantry to a dorm room fridge or a first apartment, you'll find ideas to help you break out of a kitchen rut without breaking too much of a sweat. -- adapted from info provided

Download or read book So Close to Amazing written by KariAnne Wood and published by NavPress. This book was released on 2017-09-05 with total page 235 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This is a book celebrating the incredible, awesome, special individual within each of us. It’s also a book for anyone who has ever mismatched her shoes or trimmed her own bangs when a professional might have been a better choice or added too much soap to the washer and watched it overflow. (Not that KariAnne Wood has ever done any of these things.) Fans of The Magnolia Story and The Pioneer Woman will love this debut memoir from the beloved Thistlewood Farms blogger. So Close to Amazing is a collection of hilarious and heartfelt reflections on getting it almost right―and how, instead of giving up, we can choose to simply embrace our real selves right where we are. It’s a story of transparency and honesty and recognizing that perfection is completely overemphasized and overrated. It’s about grace and learning from mistakes and rejoicing in every victory, no matter how small. Because when you find joy in the “you” God created you to be, you’ll discover the amazing that was there all along. Contains beautiful DIY project ideas anyone can do, whether you’re Pinterest perfect or craft challenged—homemade signs, centerpieces, recipe walls, and more!

Download or read book How the Grinch Stole Christmas written by Dr. Seuss and published by RH Childrens Books. This book was released on 2013-10-22 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Get in on the Christmas cheer with Dr. Seuss’s iconic holiday classic starring the Grinch and Cindy-Lou Who—guaranteed to grow your heart three sizes! Every Who down in Who-ville liked Christmas a lot...but the Grinch, who lived just north of Who-ville, did NOT! Not since “’Twas the night before Christmas” has the beginning of a Christmas tale been so instantly recognizable. From the Grinch and his dog, Max, to Cindy-Lou and all the residents of Who-ville, this heartwarming story about the effects of the Christmas spirit will warm even the coldest and smallest of hearts. Like mistletoe, candy canes, and caroling, the Grinch is a mainstay of the holidays, and his story is perfect for readers young and old.

Download or read book Drawn on the Way written by Sarah Nisbett and published by Quarry Books. This book was released on 2021-12-21 with total page 130 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Learn to observe the world more deeply—with curiosity, empathy, and joy—as you sketch the stories unfolding all around you. In Drawn on the Way, Sarah Nisbett shares her techniques for creating captivating line drawings that capture the moments and moods that you encounter on the train, in a café, outdoors, anywhere: a young woman lost in thought, a pair of hands clasped on a lap, a peppy beagle, a pair of jeans-clad crossed legs. Sarah invites you to see the people, animals, places, and objects you draw with compassionate curiosity—as more than a stranger or inanimate object, but as someone or something with a story worth knowing or imagining. Even if you are inexperienced at drawing or don’t consider yourself an artist, you can learn how to create sketches from start to finish employing techniques such as contour drawing, using line work to add texture, and adding spot color—and discover how each sketch tells a story. You’ll begin to focus on important details that reveal something about the subject you’re drawing: the graceful drape of a hand over a purse, the shy way someone tucks their feet underneath them. As you unplug, set aside perfectionism, and explore the world through drawing, you’ll learn: How to translate what you see into a compelling drawing How to silence your inner critic and find joy in drawing what captures your interest Techniques for drawing figures and creating quick portraits How to find the emotion in objects by asking questions How to draw scenes and backgrounds without becoming overwhelmed How to quickly and expressively render the natural world, including plants and animals How key details can take a sketch from plain to captivating Ways to find the extraordinary in the everyday How to transform mistakes into likeable elements Tips for becoming a visual storyteller Life lessons learned from years of live drawing We spend most of our lives on the way, rushing and running from place to place, task to task. When we have a spare minute, we usually reach for our phones and shut everything else out. The techniques, projects, and ideas in Drawn on the Way are designed to help you be more mindful about drawing, to capture the people, places, and things you encounter each day. By doing that, you’ll connect with humanity in a deeper, more meaningful way—and discover a lot about yourself.