Download or read book Barry Trotter and the Shameless Parody written by Michael Gerber and published by Penguin Books. This book was released on 2004 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Hogwash School for Wizards is the most famous school in the wizarding world and Barry Trotter is its most famous pupil. It's been that way ever since J.G. Rollins' Barry Trotter and the Philosopher's Sconebroke publishing records worldwide. But now disaster looms. The movie Barry Trotter and the Inevitable Attempt to Cash-Inhas gone into final production and the marketing machine at Wagner Bros. is going into overdrive. Hogwash is going to be submerged under a tide of souvenir-crazed Muddle fans, torn apart and sold on eBuy, stone by mossy stone. The movie must be stopped. Barry, Ermine Cringer and Lon Measly must find a way to defeat the most powerful force of grasping sleazoids the world has ever known: Hollywood.

Download or read book Barry Trotter and the Unauthorized Parody written by Michael Gerber and published by Michael Gerber. This book was released on 2001-10 with total page 184 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Parody of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter series.

Download or read book Downturn Abbey written by Michael Gerber and published by eBookIt.com. This book was released on 2012-12 with total page 139 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Downturn Abbey is an affectionate, unauthorized, book-length parody of the British TV drama, "Downton Abbey," written by the author of the million-selling Barry Trotter series.

Download or read book Barry Trotter and the Dead Horse written by Michael Gerber and published by . This book was released on 2005 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Barry Trotter is pretty disreputable and unpleasant. Imagine what he was like as a teenager. Here's the beginning of the whole sorry tale. Did Barry and Ermine do it? (Their homwork, that is.) How exactly did Lon end up with a hole in his head that whistles when the wind blows? Was Lord Valumart always that crass? And where did that ridiculous German accent come from? As funny and twisted as the first two books, BARRY TROTTER AND THE DEAD HORSE is also as affectionate towards JK Rowling's originals. This has lead to the books gaining a devoted following amongst fans of Harry Potter as well as being a welcome antidote for the over-egging (eeuwww) of the boy wizard. A process that we're not a part of at all. Oh no. Not even a tiny bit.

Download or read book Barry Trotter and the Unimpressive Gift Box written by Michael Gerber and published by Gollancz. This book was released on 2004-10-21 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Contains BARRY TROTTER AND THE SHAMELESS PARODY, BARRY TROTTER AND THE UNNECESSARY SEQUEL and the all new BARRY TROTTER AND THE DEAD HORSE.Supplied in a high-tech biodegrable, epoxy resin fixed, folded paper-pulp display case (cardboard box), these three books tell the ghastly tale of Barry Trotter, Lon Measley and Ermine Cringer. Amusingly, the story starts when barry is 22, goes on to tell what happened when he was 39 and then, because we couldn't think what do next, zips back, via a supremely unlikely plot device, to when he was 9.Laugh! at Lord Valumart's bizarrely inept attempts to kill Barry.Wonder! just how Bumblemore got to be headmaster.Sigh! when you realise that it isn't a Harry Potter book after all.What? You've only just worked that out? Oh dear, oh dear.

Download or read book The Demon in the Freezer written by Richard Preston and published by Fawcett. This book was released on 2003-08-26 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “The bard of biological weapons captures the drama of the front lines.”—Richard Danzig, former secretary of the navy The first major bioterror event in the United States-the anthrax attacks in October 2001-was a clarion call for scientists who work with “hot” agents to find ways of protecting civilian populations against biological weapons. In The Demon in the Freezer, his first nonfiction book since The Hot Zone, a #1 New York Times bestseller, Richard Preston takes us into the heart of Usamriid, the United States Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Diseases at Fort Detrick, Maryland, once the headquarters of the U.S. biological weapons program and now the epicenter of national biodefense. Peter Jahrling, the top scientist at Usamriid, a wry virologist who cut his teeth on Ebola, one of the world’s most lethal emerging viruses, has ORCON security clearance that gives him access to top secret information on bioweapons. His most urgent priority is to develop a drug that will take on smallpox-and win. Eradicated from the planet in 1979 in one of the great triumphs of modern science, the smallpox virus now resides, officially, in only two high-security freezers-at the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta and in Siberia, at a Russian virology institute called Vector. But the demon in the freezer has been set loose. It is almost certain that illegal stocks are in the possession of hostile states, including Iraq and North Korea. Jahrling is haunted by the thought that biologists in secret labs are using genetic engineering to create a new superpox virus, a smallpox resistant to all vaccines. Usamriid went into a state of Delta Alert on September 11 and activated its emergency response teams when the first anthrax letters were opened in New York and Washington, D.C. Preston reports, in unprecedented detail, on the government’ s response to the attacks and takes us into the ongoing FBI investigation. His story is based on interviews with top-level FBI agents and with Dr. Steven Hatfill. Jahrling is leading a team of scientists doing controversial experiments with live smallpox virus at CDC. Preston takes us into the lab where Jahrling is reawakening smallpox and explains, with cool and devastating precision, what may be at stake if his last bold experiment fails.

Download or read book The Breadwinner written by Deborah Ellis and published by Oxford University Press. This book was released on 2004-03-04 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Because the Taliban rulers of Kabul, Afghanistan impose strict limitations on women's freedom and behavior, eleven-year-old Parvana must disguise herself as a boy so that her family can survive after her father's arrest.

Download or read book Dear Zoe written by Philip Beard and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2006-04-25 with total page 209 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: DON'T MISS THE MAJOR MOTION PICTURE STARRING SADIE SINK OF STRANGER THINGS! Dear Zoe is a remarkable study of grief, adolescence, and healing with a pitch-perfect narrator who is at once sharp and naive, world-worried and self-centered, funny and heartbreakingly honest. Fifteen-year-old Tess DeNunzio hasn't been the same since she lost her sister Zoe to a hit-and-run accident on September 11th—when it seemed like nothing mattered except the tragedies playing out in New York and Washington. Dear Zoe is Tess's letter to her sister, written as a means of figuring out her own life and her place in the world—and the result is a novel of rare power and grace that tells us much about ours.

Download or read book Year of the Hangman written by Gary Blackwood and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2004-02-09 with total page 273 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In 1776, the rebellion of the American colonies against British rule was crushed. Now, in 1777-the year of the hangman-George Washington is awaiting execution, Benjamin Franklin's banned rebel newspaper, Liberty Tree, has gone underground, and young ne'er-do-well Creighton Brown, a fifteen-year-old Brit, has just arrived in the colonies. Having been shipped off against his will, with nothing but a distance for English authorities, Creighton befriends Franklin, and lands a job with his print shop. But the English general expects the spoiled yet loyal Creighton to spy on Franklin. As battles unfold and falsehoods are exposed, Creighton must decide where his loyalties lie...a choice that could determine the fate of a nation.

Download or read book The McAtrix Derided written by Robertski Brothers and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2010-10-14 with total page 195 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Are you looking for Nemo, or are you looking for no-one? Gordon (or 'Nemo' as he's known in a variety of internet chatrooms) finds himself rudely awakened to the reality of his mundane existence. It turns out that far from being a workaday Database Coordinator, he is the inadvertent slave of Evil Machine Intelligences(TM) who are keeping his body sealed in a virtual-reality pod whilst distracting his mind with an elaborate virtual world. He, like the bulk of humanity(but not you, because you're reading this book which is about this world being a virtual world and how could that happen?), is trapped in the McAtrix. But his awakener, the leader of the human resistance (the virile though small-framed Smurpheus) wants to do more than just free Nemo from this illusion. He thinks Nemo may be special. He thinks that Nemo just might be the No One, the nonentity whose ego is so insignificant it can confront the celebrity-obsessed McAtrix on its own terms and bring it down.

Download or read book Barry Trotter and the Unauthorized Parody written by Michael Gerber and published by Touchstone. This book was released on 2002 with total page 180 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Parody of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter series.

Download or read book The Akhenaten Adventure written by P. B. Kerr and published by Scholastic Paperbacks. This book was released on 2005 with total page 355 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Gone Bitch a Parody of Gone Girl written by Steve Lookner and published by . This book was released on 2014-09-19 with total page 160 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Amy? Hello?" I went inside and searched the entire place.Amy was gone.Hooray!!!!!***Meet Nick. He's kind of dumb. Meet his wife, Amy. She's kind of a bitch. One day Amy goes missing. What happened? Find out...in GONE BITCH!GONE BITCH is the hilarious new parody of Gone Girl which will have you on the edge of your seat AND rolling on the floor. All your favorite characters from Gone Girl are here...but way funnier!First off, there's NICK. Nick doesn't seem particularly upset that his wife is missing, or particularly anxious to find her. But he is perfectly willing to stop by the searches for Amy...because he can try to pick up girls there using lines like, "I'd like to search YOUR woods." Nick also loves lying to the police. For example, Nick's alibi for the morning Amy disappeared is that he was hang gliding, taking a karate lesson, and shooting a major motion picture with Keanu Reeves.There's also AMY, Nick's wife. Amy is basically the worst person ever. Which is unsurprising, since she's a really hot girl. Therefore her one goal in life is to make her hot girlfriends jealous, no matter what it takes. Would Amy really stoop so low as to frame Nick for murder just to make her hot girlfriends jealous? If you don't know the answer, then you haven't hung out with enough really hot girls.There's GO, Nick's sister. Go makes out with Nick a lot, but don't get the wrong idea: they are NOT having sex. (Although they do get to third base once in a while.)There's RAND and MARYBETH, Amy's parents, whose "Idiotic Amy" book series chronicles the embarrassing moments of Idiotic Amy, a girl who looks suspiciously like Amy and does embarrassing things suspiciously like things Amy has done. The books have been a huge success, with millions of girls worldwide buying volumes like "Idiotic Amy Wets The Bed" and "Idiotic Amy and the Guy She Had Sex With and Never Called Her Again".There's DESI COLLINGS, who's been stuck in the friend zone with Amy since kindergarten. Desi still hopes that one day Amy will come around and want to take things to another level, but tragically, he fails to realize that no guy ever escapes from the friend zone.And don't forget BONEY and GILPIN, the detectives investigating Amy's disappearance. They strongly suspect the "crime scene" in Nick's living room is fake, because it's pretty hard for a grand piano to flip upside down accidentally.With every page of GONE BITCH the tension builds:Will Nick go to jail?Will Amy ever return?Will Nick ever get over his diarrhea from eating a search volunteer's Frito pie?You'll want to keep reading to find out what happens, but you might not be able to stop laughing long enough to do so!Before you see the movie, read the book...that makes fun of the movie!Get GONE BITCH today!

Download or read book Barry Trotter and the Unnecessary Sequel written by Michael Gerber and published by . This book was released on 2003 with total page 328 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Like a chronic skin condition, the world's most irritating wizard is back! Barry Trotter, now 38 (going on 11), has returned to the Hogwash School for Wizardry and Witchcrap. He and his wife, Ermine Cringer, are there to deposit their Muddle-loving son Nigel, 11 (going on 38), and about as magical as a plastic fork. Just as Barry and Ermine are set to leave, Headmister Dorco Malfeasance dies. Who cares - nobody much like Dorco anyway. Barry and Ermine are installed as interim heads of the School, and kick off a carnival of arrested development. But then, in the sort of plot twist that could only happen in a cheap novel designed to leech off a massive pop culture phenomenon, Barry develops youthenasia. He begins a steady march backwards in age and reliving the horrors of adolescence (including the Acne of Fire) may not be the end of it . . .

Download or read book Across the Nightingale Floor written by Lian Hearn and published by . This book was released on 2016-01-27 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Across the Nightingale Floor is Book 1 in the five-part Tales of the Otori series. More than four million copies have been sold in over 36 countries.'The best story of magic, love, sex, revenge and suspense to have come this way since Philip Pullman' Independent On Sunday (UK) In his fortress at Inuyama, the murderous warlord Iida Sadamu surveys his famous nightingale floor. Constructed with exquisite skill, it sings at the tread of each human foot. No assassin can cross it unheard. Brought up in a remote village among the Hidden, a reclusive and spiritual people, Takeo has learned only the ways of peace. Why, then, does he possess the deadly skills that make him so valuable to the sinister Tribe? These supernatural powers will lead him to his violent destiny within the walls of Inuyama - and to an impossible longing for a girl who can never be his. His journey is one of revenge and treachery, beauty and magic, and the passion of first love. 'masterful storytelling ... a fantastic read' The Age Coming soon - the spellbinding new TALE OF SHIKANOKO, set 300 years before Otori: THE EMPEROR OF THE EIGHT ISLANDS (Books 1 & 2 in THE TALE OF SHIKANOKO) and THE LORD OF THE DARKWOOD (Books 3 & 4).PRAISE FOR THE TALES OF THE OTORI 'An engrossing fantasy saga of literary quality.' The Age'Lian Hearn's marvellous storytelling talent ... makes reading these books a moment of pure bliss.' Le Monde'an enthralling and original work of fantasy' The Times

Download or read book The Lightning Fart a Parody of the Lightning Thief Percy Jackson and the Olympians Book 1 written by Steve Lookner and published by . This book was released on 2015-03-21 with total page 116 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet Percy Stinkson. He's just a normal kid, trying to have fun and make it through school doing as little homework as possible....until he finds out he's the son of a Greek god! And Percy's father isn't just any Greek god. He's Pooseidon, God of Farts!Percy's life is totally transformed as he travels to Camp Half-Wit, where he's trained to use his special farting powers. He's going to need these powers, because he soon learns it's up to him to save the universe by going on a quest to find Zeus's stolen iPhone!It'll be a dangerous quest, but Percy will have company: Grover, a weird kid who thinks he's a half-goat, and Annabeth, a super-hot girl who unfortunately doesn't want to date Percy. Yet.There'll be loads of action and and tons of smelly farts as Percy's quest proceeds to its exciting conclusion: a showdown in the Underworld with Hades himself!The odds might be against Percy, but don't give up hope, because he'll have the ultimate weapon at his disposal: The Lightning Fart!Can a fart really save the universe?Find out...in this hilarious parody of the Percy Jackson books, THE LIGHTNING FART!

Download or read book Barry Trotter and the Unauthorized Parody written by Michael E. Gerber and published by . This book was released on 2002 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: