Download or read book The World s Greatest Dad Jokes The Complete Collection The Heirloom Edition written by Editors of Cider Mill Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-05-25 with total page 286 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The complete collection of the World's Greatest Dad Jokes is here, with more puns, quips, and corny one-liners than ever that are sure to get eyes rolling Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe The World's Greatest Dad Jokes: The Complete Collection is here, with more puns, quips, and corny one-liners than ever that are sure to get eyes rolling. With hundreds of jokes that will make you groan--then make you smile. This book is jam-packed with clever quips and unbearable wisecracks that are so bad, they're good. Now the dad joke aficionado in your life will never run out of puns, no matter how much you might want them to. The perfect gift for the dad who thinks he's heard them all, this book is sure to add even more jokes to his repertoire, for better or worse.
Download or read book Galaxy written by Gary T. Brideau and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2016-03-14 with total page 204 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One of the men glared at Thor and laughed, Thats all you have is a woman, a stupid looking alien and a stuffed bear? Yeah Right. In your dreams buddy. Gideon slowly waddled forward with his katana in his paws, pointed to one of them then positioned himself. The guy looked down at Gideon and chuckled, You want me to fight you? Youre a stuffed bear? Men, give me a sword. I have a stuffed animal to kill. That is no ordinary stuffed bear, stated Thor, That is Gideon, the Avenging Bear. Avenging nothing, I am going to slice it more ways that you can think of. Come on bear show me what you got. Then he took a swing at the bear and missed. Gideon leaped up in the air, twirled and sliced the guys left leg. The man screamed in pain lunged forward, only to have Gideons blade driven deep in his shoulder. The guy screamed, knocked the bear to the ground went to ram his sword, in the bear. Gideon rolled over, bounced off Thor and drove his blade deep, in the mans chest. The other men sprang into action after Gideon only to be vaporized, by an energy blasts from an unknown position.
Download or read book The Perfect Dad written by Rob Stennett and published by Harvest House Publishers. This book was released on 2017-02-01 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Great Dads Aren't Perfect...But They Aspire to Be Congratulations, you're hired! You have no qualifications, references, education, or experience, but you've definitely got the job. No occupation in the world operates like that...except parenthood. A father of four young girls, Rob Stennett is here to help you with some on-the-job training. With humor and thought-provoking honesty, Rob explores the 12 essential roles in your job description, including... Provider—Manage the stress of balancing work and family by establishing clear priorities at home and in your career. Pastor—Teach the wonder of Scripture and how your kids can cultivate a faith in God they love and cherish. Husband—Alleviate the pressure of modeling a healthy relationship for your kids by focusing on your spouse's needs first. Counselor—Help your kids avoid emotional pitfalls by becoming their most trusted source of wisdom. You probably already know that becoming the perfect father is an unattainable goal, but that shouldn't stop you from trying your best to be a great dad. Your effort won't go unnoticed by your wife and kids. You can thrive in the most important job you've ever been given.
Download or read book The Single Dad s Guide to the Galaxy written by Roger John McEwan and published by Palmerston Press. This book was released on 2017-07-13 with total page 258 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: ‘I’ve experienced all the different roles you have to play when there’s nobody else around: a parent, a dad, a father, a stand-in mum, a confidant, always a butler or maid, a teacher and, most crucially, a friend.’ In this enlightening but also very practical book, Roger McEwan shares the lessons he’s learned from years as a solo dad. It is not, he insists, a self-help book. But amidst the rich, always fascinating, often hilarious experiences of his times with his two children are dozens and dozens of useful pieces of advice for parents – from developing a great relationship with your ex (if you can) to letting the children pick the clothes they want to wear, teaching them to cook, and acknowledging that changing a toilet roll is too complex for anyone under the age of eighteen to understand. **
Download or read book Darth Vader and Son written by Jeffrey Brown and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2014-07-22 with total page 67 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: What if Darth Vader took an active role in raising his son? What if "Luke, I am your father" was just a stern admonishment from an annoyed dad? In this hilarious and sweet comic reimagining, Darth Vader is a dad like any other—except with all the baggage of being the Dark Lord of the Sith. Celebrated artist Jeffrey Brown's delightful illustrations give classic Star Wars® moments a fresh twist, presenting the trials and joys of parenting through the lens of a galaxy far, far away. Life lessons include lightsaber batting practice, using the Force to raid the cookie jar, Take Your Child to Work Day on the Death Star ("Er, he looks just like you, Lord Vader!"), and the special bond shared between any father and son. Plus, this is the fixed-format version, which looks almost identical to the print edition.
Download or read book I Love the Bones of You written by Christopher Eccleston and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-09-19 with total page 319 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: ‘A beautiful book’ Zoë Ball ‘My father was an “ordinary man”, which of course means he was extraordinary.' Be it as Nicky Hutchinson in Our Friends In The North, Maurice in The A Word, or his reinvention of Doctor Who, One man, in life and death, has accompanied Christopher Eccleston every step of the way – his father, Ronnie. In I Love the Bones of You, Eccleston unveils a vivid portrait of a relationship that has shaped his entire career trajectory – mirroring and defining his own highs and lows, from stage and screen triumph to breakdown, anorexia and self-doubt. Eccleston describes how the tightening grip of dementia on his father slowly blinded him to his son’s existence, forcing a new and final chapter in their connection. Told with trademark honesty and openness, I Love the Bones of You is a celebration of those on whom the spotlight so rarely shines, as told by a man who found his voice in its glare. A love letter to one man, and a paean to many.
Download or read book New York Magazine written by and published by . This book was released on 1984-11-05 with total page 148 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New York magazine was born in 1968 after a run as an insert of the New York Herald Tribune and quickly made a place for itself as the trusted resource for readers across the country. With award-winning writing and photography covering everything from politics and food to theater and fashion, the magazine's consistent mission has been to reflect back to its audience the energy and excitement of the city itself, while celebrating New York as both a place and an idea.
Download or read book The Great Adventures of Galaxy Protectors written by Sarah Crawford and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on with total page 86 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Martina is just an ordinary eighteen year old girl—until Lord Dereck told her that she’s the daughter of Lord Gannon and Lady Daisy. Now that she’s a princess from the planet Serenity, she needs to fight off bounty hunters, recruit people from different planets, learn of her past, and defeat her evil uncle Dark Lord Duskton. With a help of her Uncle Xander, Aunt Pearl, her cousin David, her friends, and new recruits, they form into one team: the Galaxy Protectors.
Download or read book F2 Galaxy of Football written by The F2 and published by Bonnier Publishing Ltd.. This book was released on 2017-10-19 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The ultimate football adventure story from the world's greatest football duo, The F2 When the evil Galaxico aliens steal the game of football from planet Earth, it's up to Jez and Billy (and the help of their trusty time machines) to assemble the greatest team to have ever played the beautiful game in the hope of stealing it back! From the 1958 World Cup Final, to the year 3000, The F2 travel through time and call upon some of heroes of footballs past, present and future to help in their quest to reinstate the joys of playing the game. With cameos from Pele, Steven Gerrard, Cristiano Ronaldo (and his granddaughter from the future, Julia Ronaldo!), this is a wonderful football story of good vs evil!
Download or read book The World s Greatest Dad Jokes Volume 3 written by Cider Mill Press, and published by Cider Mill Press. This book was released on 2020-05-05 with total page 142 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 150 dad jokes that are perfect for any crowd! Here are over 150 more hilariously hokey knee-slappers and puns in this third volume of The World’s Greatest Dad Jokes. Tired of the same humdrum ill-fitting pants quips, or jabs about turkeys being flightless birds? This perfect Father’s Day gift will keep the dads in your life on the pulse of family-friendly corny humor. With The World’s Greatest Dad Jokes Volume 3 on hand, everyone will be laughing with dads, not at them!
Download or read book Dude You re Gonna Be a Dad written by John Pfeiffer and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-03-18 with total page 224 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: There are approximately 3,712 ways for a guy to look stupid during pregnancy - this book's here to help you avoid all(most) of them. And here's your first hint: Focus on what you can be doing for her rather than what's happening to her. She's pregnant. She knows that. You know that. And her 152 baby books tell her exactly what she can expect. Your job is to learn what you can do between the stick turning blue and the drive to the delivery room to make the next nine months go as smoothly as possible. That's where John Pfeiffer steps in. Like any good coach, he's been through it. He's dealt with the morning sickness and doctor visits, painting the baby's nursery and packing the overnight bag, choosing a name, hospital, and the color of the car-seat cover. All the while he remained positive and responsive - there with a "You're beautiful" when necessary - but assertive during the decision-making process (he didn't want to wind up with a kid named Percy). And now it's your turn. She might be having the baby, but you have plenty of responsibilities.
Download or read book Wisdom of Our Fathers written by Tim Russert and published by Random House. This book was released on 2006-05-23 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: What does it really mean to be a good father? What did your father tell you, that has stayed with you throughout your life? Was there a lesson from him, a story, or a moment that helped to make you who you are? Is there a special memory that makes you smile when you least expect it? After the publication of Tim Russert’s number one New York Times bestseller about his father, Big Russ & Me, he received an avalanche of letters from daughters and sons who wanted to tell him about their own fathers, most of whom were not superdads or heroes but ordinary men who were remembered and cherished for some of their best moments–of advice, tenderness, strength, honor, discipline, and occasional eccentricity. Most of these daughters and sons were eager to express the gratitude they had carried with them through the years. Others wanted to share lessons and memories and, most important, pass them down to their own children. This book is for all fathers, young or old, who can learn from the men in these pages how to get it right, and to understand that sometimes it is the little gestures that can make the big difference for your child. For some in this book, the appreciation came later than they would have liked. But as Wisdom of Our Fathers reminds us, it is never too late to embrace it. From the father who coached his daughter in sports (and life), attending every meet, game, performance, and tournament, to the daughter who, after a fifteen-year estrangement, learned to make peace with her difficult father just before he died, to the son who came, at last, to appreciate the silent way his father could show affection, Wisdom of Our Fathers shares rewarding lessons, immeasurable gifts, and lasting values. Heartfelt, humorous, engaging, irresistibly readable, and bound to bring back memories of unforgettable moments with our own fathers, Tim Russert’s new book is not only a fitting companion to his own marvelous memoir, but also a celebration of the positive qualities passed down from generation to generation.
Download or read book 88 Great Daddy Daughter Dates written by Rob Teigen and published by Baker Books. This book was released on 2018-04-17 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: With today's busy schedules, it can be difficult for fathers to create meaningful memories with their girls. 88 Great Daddy-Daughter Dates provides dads with a wide variety of fun ideas for spending quality time with their daughters. Each date tells dads what supplies to grab, where to go, and how to grow together while having a blast and making great memories. Included for each date are Scriptures and questions to get the conversation flowing. From bird-watching and making paper airplanes to bowling and photo scavenger hunts, there's something for every dad and every little girl ages 6-12. This updated edition of 88 Great Daddy-Daughter Dates also includes conversation starters and a list of date ideas for teen daughters.
Download or read book Galactic Football League Bundle written by Scott Sigler and published by Empty Set Entertainment. This book was released on with total page 2194 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Bundle containing: The Rookie The Starter The All-Pro The MVP The Champion
Download or read book Galaxy 666 written by Pel Torro and published by Gateway. This book was released on 2013-11-28 with total page 103 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: They had reached the very limits of space. Nothing lay ahead except the evil planet, waiting to destroy. NOTES FROM CAPTAIN BRONET'S LOG: It looked like a lizard, or a snake with legs. It had a large flattish head, three eyes set in triangular formation, and a round food-intake in the centre of the "face." There was no chin. The head perched high on a mottled, leathery neck. The skin on its back was ribbed and corrugated. This creature was the first living thing we encountered on the sinister planet...
Download or read book Sherlock Sam and the Alien Encounter on Pulau Ubin written by A.J. Low and published by Epigram Books. This book was released on 2013 with total page 71 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When weird things happen while camping on Pulau Ubin, Sherlock Sam is convinced that aliens are to blame! Eager to investigate, Sherlock Sam and his not-so-eager sidekick robot Watson journey into the wilderness and discover a mystery that’s out of this world. Will these close encounters get the better of Singapore’s Greatest Kid Detective, or will he prove to be of a higher life form?
Download or read book Space Critters written by A. Carol and published by Wheatmark, Inc.. This book was released on 2015-07-02 with total page 176 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For siblings Lori, Ray, and Charlie Holland, a family trip to the Roswell area of New Mexico includes a visit to the UFO Museum, which will lead them on an adventure of a lifetime. Upon returning to their home on a Texas farm, the Holland children are reunited with their special pets -- Star, a cat; Suzi, a dog; and Frankie, a ferret. Within a few short weeks they are invited by a family of extraterrestrials to join them on a three-day trip into outer space. Told from the unique point of view of Lori's cat, Space Critters tells the story of how these pets become travelers through time and space alongside their owners. Join their adventures as they encounter a group of dangerous jellyfish, time travel to see the history of Earth, discover how the children's grandfather is connected to the extraterrestrials and the Roswell crash, and host the extraterrestrial family for a stay in their home. In this first in a series of adventures, Space Critters blends science fiction and the paranormal into a young adult series from a debut novelist who is one to watch.
