Download or read book Why Mommy Swears written by Gill Sims and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2019-03-12 with total page 368 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why Mommy Swears is the much anticipated new novel from Gill Sims, author of the hilarious Why Mommy Drinks and online sensation Peter and Jane.

Download or read book Why Mommy Drinks written by Gill Sims and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2017-11-21 with total page 352 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why Mommy Drinks is the brilliant novel from Gill Sims, the author of the online sensation Peter and Jane.

Download or read book Why Mummy Swears written by Gill Sims and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2018-06-18 with total page 352 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why Mummy Swears is the much anticipated new novel from Gill Sims, author of the hilarious Why Mummy Drinks and online sensation Peter and Jane. It's every parents' nightmare - the start of the school holidays - and instead of sitting in the sun, reading a book over a cold, crisp glass of Pinot Grigio, Mummy has two bored moppets to attend to. After frantically booking sports camps, child minder slots, not to mention time off work, Mummy is exhausted. But this is only the beginning... After being dragged to join the school's PTA in the new term by an annoyingly kind-spirited neighbour, Mummy is stuck with organising the Christmas Fayre and pleasing all the overly disapproving parents. In combination with getting to know her father's surprise new glamorous (and much younger) wife, and being forced to spend more time with her narcissistic mother, life isn't cutting her much of a break. What more could possibly happen?

Download or read book Go the F k to Sleep written by Adam Mansbach and published by Akashic Books. This book was released on 2011-06-14 with total page 18 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times Bestseller: “A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep” (NPR). “Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.” Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.

Download or read book Call Me Mummy written by Tina Baker and published by Serpent's Tail. This book was released on 2021-02-25 with total page 339 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 'Dark, heartbreaking and totally absorbing' - LORRAINE KELLY 'Brilliantly written and emotionally compulsive' - HARRIET TYCE 'A powerful and thought-provoking page turner' - KATERINA DIAMOND CALL ME MUMMY. IT'LL BE BETTER IF YOU DO. Glamorous, beautiful Mummy has everything a woman could want. Except for a daughter of her very own. So when she sees Kim - heavily pregnant, glued to her phone and ignoring her eldest child in a busy shop - she does what anyone would do. She takes her. But foul-mouthed little Tonya is not the daughter that Mummy was hoping for. As Tonya fiercely resists Mummy's attempts to make her into the perfect child, Kim is demonised by the media as a 'scummy mummy', who deserves to have her other children taken too. Haunted by memories of her own childhood and refusing to play by the media's rules, Kim begins to spiral, turning on those who love her. Though they are worlds apart, Mummy and Kim have more in common than they could possibly imagine. But it is five-year-old Tonya who is caught in the middle... ________________________________________ *** A NETGALLEY BOOK OF THE MONTH *** 'Disturbing and distinctive, this is a book I couldn't put down' - AMANDA JENNINGS 'Tense and gripping, these characters will stay with me' - ALICE CLARK-PLATTS 'Psychologically twisty and utterly gripping' - LISA HALL

Download or read book Mommy Cusses written by Dorman Serena and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2021-06-25 with total page 114 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For fans of Go the F*ck to Sleep, Mommy Cusses is a hilarious novelty parenting book full of tell-it-like-it-is quotes, snarky lists, and too-true anecdotes that will resonate with new moms everywhere. For new-ish mothers who need to laugh at the absurdity of parenting so they don't cry, who are looking for a we're-in-this-together sense of solidarity, and who don't have time to read a "real" book, here is a hilarious and highly relatable collection of mom malarkey. There are real-talk quotes, helpful lists (such as "How to Look Like You Have Your Act Together"), "mom-tivities," and quizzes, all delivered with a healthy dose of sarcasm. Packaged in a handy trim size with colorful illustrations throughout, Mommy Cusses is the perfect gift for moms and moms-to-be who need some comic relief. • GREAT GIFT: Mommy Cusses is super relatable and laugh-out-loud funny, making it an easy gift for Mother's Day or a baby shower, or an anytime gift for a parent. • PERENNIAL TOPIC: It doesn't take long to experience all the ups and downs of parenting. Mommy Cusses features timeless mommy humor that won't go out of style and a fresh look and feel that speaks to young parents. Perfect for: • Expectant parents and parents of children under 5 • Shoppers looking for a baby shower or Mother's Day gift for a friend, spouse, or daughter • Followers of the Mommy Cusses blog or Instagram account

Download or read book Breakfast at Stephanie s written by Sue Margolis and published by Delta. This book was released on 2004-06-01 with total page 338 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Playing “Winter Wonderland” for last-minute Christmas shoppers has got to be the all-time low point of Stephanie Glassman’s career. The aspiring jazz soloist and single mother has no singing prospects, no man in her life since her hot fling with a movie stuntman, and a social life that consists of having her two best friends over for high-calorie Sunday brunches. Even her grandmother’s having more sex than she is. That is, until toddler Jake’s irresistible father hurtles back into her life. Albert promises fidelity, plus married life filled with the best sex Stephanie’s ever had. But there’s a tantalizing new wrinkle: Frank Waterman, rising star and Stephanie’s old crush, is suddenly semi-available and interested. And her stalled career seems to be heating up. But when her big break erupts in a scandal that puts her on the front page instead, Stephanie’s in a whole new league. Now, with fame at her door and two hot guys fighting over her, Stephanie’s got some big decisions to make…and they may surprise everyone—including her.

Download or read book Blood Brothers written by Willy Russell and published by Bloomsbury Publishing. This book was released on 2014-06-22 with total page 128 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A Liverpudlian West Side Story, Blood Brothers is the story of twin brothers separated at birth because their mother cannot afford to keep them both. One of them is given away to wealthy Mrs Lyons and they grow up as friends in ignorance of their fraternity until the inevitable quarrel unleashes a blood-bath. Blood Brothers was first performed at the Liverpool Playhouse in 1983 and subsequently transferred to the Lyric Theatre, London. It was revived in the West End in 1988 for a long-running production and opened on Broadway in 1993.

Download or read book Finlay Donovan Is Killing It written by Elle Cosimano and published by Minotaur Books. This book was released on 2021-02-02 with total page 285 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Getting the job done" for one single mom takes on a whole new meaning in Finlay Donovan is Killing It. A USA Today bestseller! One of Suspense Magazine's "Best Thrillers of 2021" One of New York Public Library's Best Books of 2021 Nominated for the Left Coast Crime 2022 Lefty Award for the Best Humorous Mystery “Finlay Donovan is irresistible!”—Janet Evanovich Finlay Donovan is killing it . . . except, she’s really not. She’s a stressed-out single-mom of two and struggling novelist, Finlay’s life is in chaos: the new book she promised her literary agent isn’t written, her ex-husband fired the nanny without telling her, and this morning she had to send her four-year-old to school with hair duct-taped to her head after an incident with scissors. When Finlay is overheard discussing the plot of her new suspense novel with her agent over lunch, she’s mistaken for a contract killer, and inadvertently accepts an offer to dispose of a problem husband in order to make ends meet . . . Soon, Finlay discovers that crime in real life is a lot more difficult than its fictional counterpart, as she becomes tangled in a real-life murder investigation. Fast-paced, deliciously witty, and wholeheartedly authentic in depicting the frustrations and triumphs of motherhood in all its messiness, hilarity, and heartfelt moment, Finlay Donovan Is Killing It is the first in a brilliant new series from YA Edgar Award nominee Elle Cosimano.

Download or read book The Twins written by Saskia Sarginson and published by Redhook. This book was released on 2013-07-30 with total page 240 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: They were inseparable until an innocent mistake tore them apart. Growing up, Viola and Issy clung to each other in the wake of their mother's eccentricity, as she dragged them from a commune to a tiny Welsh village. They thought the three of them would be together forever. But an innocent mistake one summer set them on drastically different paths. Now in their twenties, Issy is trying to hold together a life as a magazine art director, while Viola is slowly destroying herself, consumed with guilt over the events they unknowingly set into motion as children. When it seems that Viola might never recover, Issy returns to the town they haven't seen in a decade, to face her own demons and see what answers, if any, she can find. A deeply moving, gripping debut, this is a novel about the secrets we carry, and the bonds between twins.

Download or read book It written by Stephen King and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-09-05 with total page 1184 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Includes a selection from Sleeping beauties by Stephen and Owen King after page 1157 (to be published in Sept. 2017).

Download or read book How Not to F Them Up written by Oliver James and published by Random House. This book was released on 2010-06-03 with total page 386 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: As a mother, are you comfortable in your skin? Want to know how best to be a stay-at-home or working mum? Babies have very simple needs, yet many parents are overwhelmed with elaborate advice on how to meet them. In How Not to F*** Them Up, leading child psychologist Oliver James argues that your under-threes do not need training; it's getting your head straight as a parent that's important. Drawing on extensive interviews and the lastest clinical research, James identifies three basic types of mum: the Hugger, the Organiser and the Fleximum. Outlining the benefits and pitfalls of each, How Not to F*** Them Up shows you how to recognise which style suits you best and outlines simple strategies to reconcile personal ambitions with the needs of your family. Empowering and provocative, Oliver James will help you make the best choices for bringing up a happy, confident child.

Download or read book Omens written by Kelley Armstrong and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2013-08-20 with total page 512 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 New York Times bestselling author Kelley Armstrong introduces the first chilling novel in the Cainsville series. Olivia Taylor-Jones is shattered to learn that she’s adopted. Her biological parents? Notorious serial killers. On a quest to learn more about her past, Olivia lands in the small town of Cainsville, Illinois. As she draws on long-hidden abilities, Olivia begins to realize that there are dark secrets in Cainsville—and powers lurking in the shadows.

Download or read book The Love Hypothesis written by Laura Steven and published by Electric Monkey. This book was released on 2020-03-05 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An LGBT romantic comedy with a twist from the Comedy Women in Print prize winner Laura Steven, author of The Exact Opposite of Okay. A hilarious love story with bite, for fans of Sex Education, Booksmart, Becky Albertalli's Love, Simon and Jenny Han's To All The Boys I've Loved Before. Physics genius Caro Kerber-Murphy knows she's smart. With straight As and a college scholarship already in the bag, she's meeting her two dads' colossal expectations and then some. But there's one test she's never quite been able to ace: love. And when, in a particularly desperate moment, Caro discovers a (definitely questionable) scientific breakthrough that promises to make you irresistible to everyone around you, she wonders if this could be the key. What happens next will change everything Caro thought she knew about chemistry - in the lab and in love. Is hot guy Haruki with her of his own free will? Are her feelings for her best friend Keiko some sort of side-effect? Will her dog, Sirius, ever stop humping her leg? Laura is the author of fiercely funny feminist comedy The Exact Opposite of Okay and its sequel, A Girl Called Shameless. The Exact Opposite of Okay was a bestselling young adult debut in 2018 and won the inaugural Comedy Women in Print prize, founded by Helen Lederer, from a shortlist including Gail Honeyman's Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine and Why Mummy Swears by Gill Sims. Praise for The Exact Opposite of Okay: 'A brilliant social satire ... disarmingly charming and relatable ... it was hilarious. Laura Steven is an explosive talent on the page!' CWIP judges Marian Keyes, Kathy Lette, Katy Brand, Allison Pearson, Shazia Mirza and Jennifer Young 'Laura Steven simultaneously destroyed the patriarchy and made me laugh so hard I choked. I will protect Izzy O'Neill with my life.' Becky Albertalli, author of Love, Simon

Download or read book The Mummy written by Loudon and published by Legare Street Press. This book was released on 2023-07-18 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this early work of science fiction, the author explores the idea of reanimation and its consequences. The Mummy: A Tale of the Twenty-Second Century is a gripping and thought-provoking adventure. This work has been selected by scholars as being culturally important, and is part of the knowledge base of civilization as we know it. This work is in the "public domain in the United States of America, and possibly other nations. Within the United States, you may freely copy and distribute this work, as no entity (individual or corporate) has a copyright on the body of the work. Scholars believe, and we concur, that this work is important enough to be preserved, reproduced, and made generally available to the public. We appreciate your support of the preservation process, and thank you for being an important part of keeping this knowledge alive and relevant.

Download or read book Slummy Mummy written by Fiona Neill and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2007-07-05 with total page 552 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A smart, laugh-out-loud debut novel about a deeply flawed but endearing stay-at-home mom, a book for anyone who took Helen Fielding’s Bridget Jones to heart a decade ago-and now has kids. Lucy Sweeney has three sons, a husband on a short fuse, and a tendency toward domestic disaster. It has been years since the dirty laundry pile was less than three feet high, months since she remembered to have sex, and weeks since her toddler started using the trash can as a toilet. Lucy is living in a constant state of emergency, caught between perfectionist Yummy Mummy No. 1 and competitive Alpha Mum, making it hard for her to remember exactly why she exchanged her career and sanity for less than blissful domesticity. When she begins a flirtation with Sexy Domesticated Dad, a father from the school car-pool lane, the string of white lies to cover up the trail of chaos and illicit desire starts to unravel and disaster looms. Slummy Mummy is a hilarious novel about the dilemmas of modern marriage and motherhood for those who never discovered their inner domestic goddess. Pitch-perfect and satisfyingly smart, it does for the stay-at-home mother what Allison Pearson's blockbuster bestseller I Don't Know How She Does It did for the working mom: It offers a lovable, flawed character who resonates, entertains, and undoubtedly has it worse than you do.

Download or read book I Knead My Mommy written by Francesco Marciuliano and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2014-08-05 with total page 114 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Just when we all thought things couldn't get any cuter, from the author of the New York Times bestselling I Could Pee on This comes I Knead My Mommy, a book of confessional poems about the triumphs, trials, and daily discoveries of being a kitten. From climbing walls to claiming hearts, these little cats bare all in such instant classics as "And Then You Said 'No,'" "Ode to a Lizard I Didn't Know Is Also a Pet in This House," and "I Will Save You." With adorable photos of the poetic prodigies throughout, this volume gives readers a glimpse into their confused and curious feline minds as they encounter the world around them.