Download or read book Totlandia 2 Book Set written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2018-08-28 with total page 427 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THIS 2-BOOK SET CONTAINS THE FIRST TWO NOVELS OF THE ONESIES YEAR—FALL and WINTER—IN AN 8-PART EPISODIC SERIES. Each book completes a story arc, but it includes a series cliffhanger that connects Books 1-4; and then Books 5-8. Description: The Pacific Heights Moms & Tots Club is the most exclusive children’s playgroup in all of San Francisco. For the city’s ultra-competitive elite, the club’s ten annual spots are the ultimate parenting prize. But not everyone is PHM&TC material. The club’s founder, Bettina Connaught Cross, adheres to strict membership rules: Moms only. No single parents or working mothers allowed. Membership is an arduous commitment. And there’s no room in the club for scandal, bad behavior, or imperfection…from tots or their moms. In a world of power and prestige, no one has more than Bettina. And as every mom in Pacific Heights knows, you simply cannot cross her. But this year’s admissions process is more rigorous than ever, pitting prospective members against each other to prove their mettle. But four of the six candidates vying for the remaining four slots have a secret that would knock them out of the running. Jade is a former stripper and porn actress, who has been absent for most of her son’s life. Jillian’s husband cleaned out their joint accounts and left her for his pregnant assistant. Ally never even had a husband—just a sperm donor—and she’s hiding a high-ranking corporate job. And Lorna fears that her son may have special needs… just the excuse her sister-in-law, Bettina, needs to deny her entry to the club. Can these hopeful moms keep up appearances long enough to outlast the competition? Or will their chances—and their private lives—go up in flames? Friendship. Lies. Seduction. Betrayal. Welcome to Totlandia. PRAISE FOR THE TOTLANDIA SERIES: I love a good mommy send-up as much as the next gal, and this peek into the ridiculousness of the San Francisco upper crust is delightful. Whether or not you’ve ever had the pleasure (or pain) of joining a playgroup, Brown’s tale is as charming as it is cringeworthy. I laughed, I winced, I kept scrolling.” —Romantic Times “With affairs, pending divorces, secret jobs, and unsavory pasts, each wannabe member hides something that could blow her chances for good.Like the characters in reality shows such as “Dance Moms,” the women in Pacific Heights might be over-the-top, but in the end, the best interests of their kids are (almost) always at heart. Laugh-out-loud funny and sometimes touching, the “Totlandia” novellas serve as the perfect quick read for busy moms or anyone looking to escape with some gossipy fun.” —Examiner.com "Josie Brown writes Totlandia with her usual storytelling flair. The dialogue is smooth and flowing. The characters are easy to side with or become angry with, depending on each situation. The scenery is easy to visualize. And we mustn’t forget all the sex (blushworthy, at that) and scandal that is a staple of a true Josie Brown novel. It’s like a soap opera for mommies. Guilty pleasure, anyone?" —Melissa Amster, Chick Lit Central “This book is wonderfully written and has more than just drama. There are touching moments, parts that made me laugh out loud, and as I read the story I felt like I was reading a television show!”—Divine Secrets of a Domestic Goddess "Totlandia by Josie Brown was just a real joy to read. I loved the variety of characters, the balance of funny and serious moments, and just the wacky story. I cannot wait to see what is next in the series!” —The Book CellarX “Brown did it again! She wrote a book that is both hysterical and original. She gets at the heart of motherhood and all its glory and shame! Brown loves to develop numerous characters and you sure to connect with one, if not all in some way. She makes you think, with whimsy and fun. I absolutely adore her writing and I cannot wait to drive into Book Two of this series!” —Mommy Book Nerd

Download or read book Totlandia 4 Book Set written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2015-11-25 with total page 669 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: ALL FOUR SEASONS OF THE ONESIES YEAR, IN ONE COLLECTION. Book 1, The Onesies (Fall) Book 2, The Onesies (Winter) Book 3, The Onesies (Spring) Book 4, The Onesies (Summer) The Pacific Heights Moms & Tots Club is the most exclusive children’s playgroup in all of San Francisco. For the city’s ultra-competitive elite, the club’s ten annual spots are the ultimate parenting prize. But not everyone is PHM&TC material. The club’s founder, Bettina Connaught Cross, adheres to strict membership rules: Moms only. No single parents or working mothers allowed. Membership is an arduous commitment. And there’s no room in the club for scandal, bad behavior, or imperfection…from tots or their moms. In a world of power and prestige, no one has more than Bettina. And as every mom in Pacific Heights knows, you simply cannot cross her. But this year’s admissions process is more rigorous than ever, pitting prospective members against each other to prove their mettle. But four of the six candidates vying for the remaining four slots have a secret that would knock them out of the running. Jade is a former stripper and porn actress, who has been absent for most of her son’s life. Jillian’s husband cleaned out their joint accounts and left her for his pregnant assistant. Ally never even had a husband—just a sperm donor—and she’s hiding a high-ranking corporate job. And Lorna fears that her son may have special needs… just the excuse her sister-in-law, Bettina, needs to deny her entry to the club. Can these hopeful moms keep up appearances long enough to outlast the competition? Or will their chances—and their private lives—go up in flames? Friendship. Lies. Seduction. Betrayal. Welcome to Totlandia. PRAISE FOR THE TOTLANDIA SERIES: I love a good mommy send-up as much as the next gal, and this peek into the ridiculousness of the San Francisco upper crust is delightful. Whether or not you’ve ever had the pleasure (or pain) of joining a playgroup, Brown’s tale is as charming as it is cringeworthy. I laughed, I winced, I kept scrolling.” —Romantic Times “With affairs, pending divorces, secret jobs, and unsavory pasts, each wannabe member hides something that could blow her chances for good.Like the characters in reality shows such as “Dance Moms,” the women in Pacific Heights might be over-the-top, but in the end, the best interests of their kids are (almost) always at heart. Laugh-out-loud funny and sometimes touching, the “Totlandia” novellas serve as the perfect quick read for busy moms or anyone looking to escape with some gossipy fun.” —Examiner.com "Josie Brown writes Totlandia with her usual storytelling flair. The dialogue is smooth and flowing. The characters are easy to side with or become angry with, depending on each situation. The scenery is easy to visualize. And we mustn’t forget all the sex (blushworthy, at that) and scandal that is a staple of a true Josie Brown novel. It’s like a soap opera for mommies. Guilty pleasure, anyone?" —Melissa Amster, Chick Lit Central “This book is wonderfully written and has more than just drama. There are touching moments, parts that made me laugh out loud, and as I read the story I felt like I was reading a television show!”—Divine Secrets of a Domestic Goddess "Totlandia by Josie Brown was just a real joy to read. I loved the variety of characters, the balance of funny and serious moments, and just the wacky story. I cannot wait to see what is next in the series!” —The Book CellarX “Brown did it again! She wrote a book that is both hysterical and original. She gets at the heart of motherhood and all its glory and shame! Brown loves to develop numerous characters and you sure to connect with one, if not all in some way. She makes you think, with whimsy and fun. I absolutely adore her writing and I cannot wait to drive into Book Two of this series!” —Mommy Book Nerd

Download or read book The Housewife Assassin s Killer 2 Book Set written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2012-11-12 with total page 535 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: OWN THEM TOGETHER! Book 1: The Housewife Assassin's Handbook / Book 2: The Housewife Assassin's Guide to Gracious Killing Murder, suspense, sex--and some handy household tips. "Secrets, sex, money and scandal! Josie Brown is truly entertaining reading." -- Jackie Collins IN BOOK 1: THE HOUSEWIFE ASSASSIN'S HANDBOOK: - EVERY DESPERATE HOUSEWIFE WANTS AN ALIAS: Donna Stone has one...and it happens to be government-sanctioned. - BUT DONNA EARNED IT THE HARD WAY: Her husband was killed the day she delivered their third child. - TO AVENGE HER HUSBAND'S MURDER: Donna leads a secret life: as an assassin. - BUT ESPIONAGE MAKES FOR STRANGE BEDFELLOWS: And brings new meaning to that old adage, "Honey, I'm home..." IN BOOK 2, THE HOUSEWIFE ASSASSIN'S GUIDE TO GRACIOUS KILLING - HOUSEWIFE ASSASSIN DONNA STONE'S MISSION: Stop a rogue operative before he assassinates the newly-elected Russian president -- on US soil! - DONNA WANTS A DIVORCE: But first she's got to serve a summons to a deadbeat dad... who's also a terrorist! - AS FOR DONNA'S LOVE LIFE: Turns out the spy who loves her has a bombshell secret of his own...

Download or read book Totlandia The Onesies Book 2 Winter written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2014-08-17 with total page 210 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: IN BOOK 2 OF THE TOTLANDIA SERIES: In this second book of the Totlandia series, five mommies are just one misstep away from entry into the elite Pacific Heights Moms & Tots Club. Everyone has a scandalous secret to hide, but who will be the next to fall? With just four spots remaining, will the five remaining ladies turn cutthroat? Or will their newfound friendships be strong enough to help them band together?

Download or read book Totlandia The Twosies Book 5 Fall written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2015-10-02 with total page 292 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THIS IS BOOK 5 IN AN 8-PART EPISODIC SERIES. Each book completes a story arc, but it includes a series cliffhanger that connects Books 1-4; And then Books 5-8. IN BOOK 5 OF THE TOTLANDIA SERIES: When Bettina Cross is faced with having to share the leadership of her beloved Pacific Heights Moms and Tots Club with her sister-in-law, Lorna Connaught, she plays dirty—only to discover that her actions have aligned her two true enemies: Kimberley Savitch, and Kelly Overton. Bettina’s problems are compounded when Daniel Warwick, a Department of Justice prosecutor, wants to use her as bait to trap her soon-to-be ex, Art, into coming home and answering to long list of fraud charges. The fact that Art has scammed most of San Francisco’s wealthiest families has Bettina fighting desperately to preserve her most priceless possession: her social standing. When Brady lines up venture capital funding for Life of Pie, Ally must tamp down his gung-ho power ranger tendencies, while at the same time shore up Jillian’s insecurities that her pies won’t live up to Brady’s promises. And now that the once homeless Reggie is teaching the complete works of Shakespeare to UC Berkeley undergrads, Jade struggles with her fear that she’s competing for his affections with his younger, more beautiful students. Finally, an unexpected tragedy puts Jillian in the middle of her ex's life again—with consequences that will affect her future and those of her twins—forever.

Download or read book Totlandia The Twosies Book 8 Summer written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2017-12-07 with total page 314 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: IN BOOK 8 OF THE TOTLANDIA SERIES: The final book of the series is filled with surprising conclusions for the Pacific Heights parents you’ve come to love—and the one you love to hate: Stress from the club and motherhood puts Lorna into a tailspin that threatens life. Will Matthew make the right choice for her and their children? Jade’s past puts her career and her marriage to Reggie in jeopardy; In the hope of salvaging her friendship with Jillian, Ally makes a decision that will affect their lives forever. But can it also save her relationship with Brady? And finally: when Art’s funeral fails to end Bettina’s personal purgatory in San Francisco’s social circles, her new puts her back on top—but her successes come at a high price: the love and acceptance of those she loves most. Welcome to Totlandia's summer of love, lust, temptation, and redemption.

Download or read book Totlandia The Onesies Book 3 Spring written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2014-08-17 with total page 252 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: IN BOOK 3 OF THE TOTLANDIA SERIES: The surviving moms are ready to reap the rewards of membership, but none of them counted on club founder, Bettina Connaught Cross, needing a pick-me-up from a bitter betrayal, whereas the new Onesies moms are trying to stay out of her sightlines long enough to deal with their own issues: Lorna wants to tell her family about Dante’s autism, but keeping it on her own terms could be difficult when her hippie mom and socialite mother-in-law meet for the first time. Jillian fights to regain her financial footing and confront her own insecurities, finding comfort in an unexpected place. And Ally can’t bear the thought of hurting Jade, so she continues to bury her feelings for Brady. But when another desperate housewife stirs the mix, Jade could become a pawn in an even more devious game.

Download or read book Totlandia The Onesies Book 1 Fall written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2014-08-17 with total page 255 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THIS IS BOOK 1 IN AN 8-PART EPISODIC SERIES. Each book completes a story arc, but it includes a series cliffhanger that connects Books 1-4; And then Books 5-8. IN BOOK 1 OF THE TOTLANDIA SERIES: In a world of power and prestige, no one has more than Bettina Connaught Cross, leader of the Pacific Heights Moms & Tots Club. If you want to be admitted into the most exclusive children’s playgroup in all of San Francisco, you simply cannot cross her. But this year’s admissions process is more rigorous than ever, pitting prospective members against each other to prove their mettle. Four of the six candidates vying for the remaining four slots have a secret that would knock them out of the running. Jade is a former stripper and porn actress, who has been absent for most of her son’s life. Jillian’s husband cleaned out their joint accounts and left her for his pregnant assistant. Ally never even had a husband—just a sperm donor—and she’s hiding a high-ranking corporate job. And Lorna fears that her son may have special needs… just the excuse her sister-in-law, Bettina, needs to deny her entry to the club. Can these hopeful moms keep up appearances long enough to outlast the competition? Or will their chances—and their private lives—go up in flames?

Download or read book It s Hard to Be a Verb written by Julia Cook and published by National Center for Youth Issues. This book was released on 2008-09-26 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Being a verb is hard! Especially for Louis, who can't seem to control himself when he gets the urge to move at the wrong time and situation. My knees start itching. My toes start twitching. My skin gets jumpy. Others get grumpy. Louis' mom comes to the rescue by teaching him techniques to help keep his inner itching, twitching and jumping to be a verb in check. A positive resource for anyone dealing with ADHD or challenged by someone who has ADHD.

Download or read book The Housewife Assassin s Killer 3 Book Set A for Assassin written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2023-07-26 with total page 727 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 3 Full-Length Novels by Josie Brown Murder. Suspense. Sex. And some handy household tips. THE HOUSEWIFE ASSASSIN'S HANDBOOK (Book 1) Every desperate housewife wants an alias. Donna Stone has one--and it happens to be government-sanctioned. She earned it the hard way: her husband was killed the day she delivered her third child. To avenge his death, she leads a secret life - as an assassin. But when terrorism hits close to home, it makes for strange bedfellows -- and brings new meaning to the old adage, "Honey, I'm home..." If you love funny mysteries with hard-boiled, sexy women sleuths, check out THE HOUSEWIFE ASSASSIN'S HANDBOOK! THE HOUSEWIFE ASSASSIN'S GUIDE TO GRACIOUS KILLING (Book 2) Donna and Jack are in the kind of hot mess that can cause an international incident. A nuclear arms summit, hosted by a politically-connected American billionaire industrialist, provides the perfect opportunity for a rogue operative to assassinate of the newly-elected Russian president on US soil. Acme operative Donna Stone's mission: seek and exterminate the shooter, before all hell--and World War III--break loose. Also on Donna's to-do list: file for divorce. Throw in a couple of playdates and a few naughty neighbors, you've got a whole lot of fun. THE HOUSEWIFE ASSASSIN'S DEADLY DOSSIER (Book 15 / Full-Length Prequel) Acme Industries black-ops agent Jack Craig is tasked with investigating the mysterious death of his organization's most prolific hitman, Carl Stone, only to fall in love with the dead man's wife, Donna--a woman he must never contact, but who may hold the key to her husband's disappearance. When Acme approaches Donna to join their organization as an assassin, Jack's undercover mission will change both their lives forever.

Download or read book The Baby Planner written by Josie Brown and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-04-05 with total page 230 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Nanny Diaries meets The Wedding Planner in this smart, dishy novel from the author of Secret Lives of Husbands and Wives—featuring a woman who runs San Francisco’s premier baby planning company and the mommies-to-be who seek out her services. Today’s trend seems to be that long before a professional woman’s baby bump becomes obvious under her Armani suit, she turns to San Francisco’s premier baby planner, Maddie McFadden, whose job it is to make her clients’ pregnancies emotionally painless. Maddie may make her living consulting with new moms on the latest and greatest baby gadgets no parent should be without, or which mommy meet-ups are the most socially desirable, but the success of her marriage to husband Brady depends on controlling her own urges toward motherhood. He’s adamant that they stay childless, but Maddie suspects it’s only because he’s still too upset that his out-of-town ex-wife rarely lets him see their eight-year-old son. Living vicariously through her clueless clients and her twin sisters’ precocious toddlers only makes Maddie’s biological clock tick louder. As she helps her newest client—Tyler Halstead, a stockbroker who must raise his newborn alone after the tragic death of his wife in childbirth—she tries her best to get pregnant “accidentally.” If that should happen, Brady will have to live with it… right? But when the unexpected happens, Maddie learns the most important life lesson of all: How we nurture is the true nature of love.

Download or read book Mattland written by Hazel Hutchins and published by . This book was released on 2008 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A story about the power of play and imagination.

Download or read book Secret Lives of Husbands and Wives written by Josie Brown and published by Signal Press. This book was released on 2017-07-09 with total page 346 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Suburbia is a jungle, filled with lots of vicious creatures.Take the Paradise Heights Women’s League board. Lyssa Harper should have warned golden-haired DILF du jour Harry Wilder what he was getting into when she invited him to meet the mommies who run their suburban, gated community. At least he brought cupcakes. Since meeting the former Master-of-the-Universe turned stay-at-home single dad, Lyssa has been his domestic Sherpa, teaching him the ins and outs of suburban life. She just didn’t realize her friends would show up at his house unannounced with casseroles, leopard-print bikini briefs, and plans to rearrange his kitchen cabinets. The truth is, if Harry and his wife, the neighborhood’s “perfect couple,” can call it quits, what does that mean for everyone else? Lyssa’s husband, Ted, is a great father, but he pays her Pilates-pumped momtourage more attention than he does his own wife. Her friends gossip about the neighbors while ignoring their own problems: infertility, infidelity, and eating disorders. When Harry sets boundaries with his new fan club, he is exiled from the neighborhood’s in-clique. But Lyssa refuses to snub him. What she never expects is the explosive impact her ongoing friendship with Harry will have on her close-knit pals—and on her marriage.

Download or read book The Housewife Assassin s Handbook written by Josie Brown and published by . This book was released on 2015-02-28 with total page 286 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Murder, suspense, sex--and some handy household tips. Every desperate housewife wants an alias. Donna Stone has one--and it happens to be government-sanctioned. Donna leads a secret life as an assassin.

Download or read book Good Deeds written by Kathryn Moon and published by . This book was released on 2023-05-18 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Nötchka Uumian, solo-scavenger and pilot, only came to Bandalier for business. But when her first ever heat cycle hits, she has two choices: get off the planet or find somewhere safe to ride out the heatburns. Determined to never end up mated and trapped in a kitchen, she heads into the Droid district. You can't mate if the other person isn't an organic right? Low on funds and preparing for weeks of sexual stupor, Nötchka finds herself in the Nuts in Bolts, a nearly deserted Cozy House with a handful of older models, two of which aren't even servicing. But the owner, Proto model Avan-8, is willing to trade sex for repairs and Nötchka is desperate. Everything will stay simple with droids... or it would if she didn't end up liking them all so much. If she can just make it through her heat without too many feelings, avoid the pack of Dendärys males that seem determined to catch her, and figure out why women are going missing, it will all work out. It's definitely not vekking working out. Good Deeds is a full length, insta-burn, standalone, whychoose romance novel, starring a fiesty heroine and five fritzing hot android heroes.

Download or read book Holly Banks Full of Angst written by Julie Valerie and published by Lake Union Publishing. This book was released on 2019 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A laugh-out-loud debut novel for anyone who's tried to live the perfect life--and learned the hard way there's no such thing. Holly Banks could not have made a worse first impression on the seemingly perfect moms in her new affluent community, the Village of Primm. Turns out wearing pink piggy pajama bottoms while dropping off her kindergartener late to the first day of school wasn't her best look. Not to mention Holly's worried her husband may be having an affair, she can't get her daughter to stop sucking her thumb, her hard-won film degree is collecting dust, and to top it all off, the power-hungry PTA president clearly has it in for her... To make matters even worse, Holly's natural eye for drama lands her smack-dab in the middle of a neighborhood mystery--right as her own crazy mother shows up in Primm "to help." Through it all, Holly begins to realize her neighbors may be just as flawed as--and even wackier than--she is, leaving her to wonder: Is there such a thing as a perfect mom?

Download or read book Totlandia Book 5 The Twosies Fall written by Josie Brown and published by . This book was released on 2015-10-22 with total page 282 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Friendship. Lies. Seduction. Betrayal. Welcome to Totlandia.