Download or read book Unseen Unheard written by Amity Pierce Buxton and published by CCB Publishing. This book was released on 2013-06 with total page 249 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When presumably heterosexual spouses turn out to be gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender, the unexpected revelation overshadows its devastating impact on their straight wives and husbands. Unseen-Unheard opens the window on their remarkable journeys from trauma to transformation. What would you do if your husband said he'd fallen in love with a man or thinks he might be gay or bisexual, or you discovered your wife's texts, photos, or emails indicating she has a female lover and wonders if she might be lesbian or bisexual? Well, this happens, a shattering reality that at least two million men and women have faced and tried to understand and accept, even as we were unseen and our voices unheard. Who are we? We are husbands and wives left behind when our spouses came out or after we discovered they were gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender. Shocked and paralyzed, swirling in the devastating wake of our beloveds' revelation, we had to pick up unrecognizable pieces of our former lives and try to reconfigure them without much outside support, recognition, or understanding of the depth of the crisis. Yes, straight spouses typically cope alone with unique issues of sexuality, betrayal, and broken belief systems. Slowly, we redefine ourselves, create new lives, affirm the joy of living, and reap life's infinite possibilities. We invite you to walk with us and experience our journey from the first desperate cries of discovery or disclosure to insights and wisdom gained as we resolve our issues and transform our lives. As you observe and listen, we hope you will embrace the courage, creativity, and resilience of our strength, which we didn't know we had, yet was so powerful that lifelong habits were broken and we uniquely and marvelously became who we were meant to be. About the Authors: Amity Pierce Buxton, her Ph.D. from Columbia University, has taught grades pre-school through graduate school. Member of the American Psychological Association, she serves on the editorial boards of the Journal of Bisexuality and the Journal of GLBT Family Studies and on the board of the Catholic Association for Gay and Lesbian Ministry. She wrote The Other Side of the Closet: the Coming-Out Crisis for Straight Spouses and Families and founded the worldwide Straight Spouse Network. Currently, she counsels spouses and couples, conducts research, writes articles and chapters, lectures, and gives workshops on all aspects of the impact of a spouse's coming out in a mixed-orientation or transgender/non-transgender marriage. R. L. Pinely writes, "Collaborating with Amity to write this book has been an amazing journey. Absorbing her expertise has been a rare privilege as we lived vicariously through the lives of others and walked in their shoes. As owner of an online support group, I'm so thankful that I have the opportunity every day to pass along her wisdom, insight, experience, and understanding to nearly 3,000 women." Visit the Straight Spouse Network website: www.straightspouse.org

Download or read book The Straight Spouse written by Vivian Fransen and published by . This book was released on 2017-07-05 with total page 266 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A love story about a woman married to a man who turns out to be gay and how she deals with it. Set in the early 90s, she thinks she is the only woman to face this unthinkable threat to her marriage. Her journey-sometimes disturbing, sometimes uplifting-is about the importance of letting go and finding one's own way.

Download or read book When Your Spouse Comes Out written by Carol Grever and published by Routledge. This book was released on 2012-10-12 with total page 172 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Effective therapeutic self-help techniques for a straight mate’s recovery One of the most traumatic events that can happen in a marriage is discovering your mate is gay. When Your Spouse Comes Out: A Straight Mate’s Recovery Manual is a comprehensive exploration of the trauma that provides practical steps that successful individuals have taken to keep this event from ruining their future. This guide offers solid therapeutic techniques for self-help and presents poignant true stories that illustrate that the damage is not irreparable. The book examines the various reactions to the coming-out event, the personal challenges and obstacles often experienced, and shares lessons learned and some of the secrets of transformation. When this crisis hits home, isolation, depression, anger, grief, and self-recrimination take root. When Your Spouse Comes Out: A Straight Mate’s Recovery Manual presents role models, analysis, practices, and activities promoting long-term emotional recovery for heterosexual men and women whose intimate partners are gay. The text includes integrated exercises helpful for class work and student discussion and case studies of people who recount their stories and explain their recovery. Topics in When Your Spouse Comes Out: A Straight Mate’s Recovery Manual include: different straight spouse responses to the coming out event diverse ways gay mates approach coming out typical stages of coping by straight spouses health risks how to tell the children helping children with the resulting challenges paths toward healing recreating family and more When Your Spouse Comes Out: A Straight Mate’s Recovery Manual offers a self-directed path to recovery which can be used individually or in the context of a support group. This guide is invaluable for straight spouses working alone or in groups, therapists, counselors, group facilitators, librarians, families of gays/lesbians, and their mates.

Download or read book The Other Side of the Closet written by Amity Buxton and published by Trade Paper Press. This book was released on 1994-06-07 with total page 362 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Ask for ask desk.

Download or read book Over the Cliff written by Bonnie Kaye and published by CCB Publishing. This book was released on 2011-05 with total page 197 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Over the Cliff" is a self-help book for husbands and wives living in straight/gay marriages. Over three million gay men in the United States and millions more around the world are living double lives in marriages to women due to societal pressures or a lack of understanding their homosexuality at the time of marriage. This book has over a dozen interviews with men who have lived through this experience and offer their insights to others. The book is co-authored by Bonnie Kaye, M.Ed., an internationally recognized counseling specialist for straight wives married to gay men and Doug Dittmer, a gay husband peer counselor who has worked with Kaye over the past five years helping numerous gay men in marriages come to terms with their homosexuality so they can move on to more fulfilling lives. About the Authors Bonnie Kaye is an internationally recognized Relationship Counselor/Author in the field of straight/gay marriages. She has provided relationship counseling for over 25 years with more than 70,000 women who have sexually dysfunctional husbands due to homosexuality, bisexuality, transgenderism or sexual addictions. She is considered an authority in this field by other professionals and the media. Kaye has published five books on straight/gay relationships, which have sold thousands of copies. Her website www.Gayhusbands.com has consistently remained in the number one position on Google, Yahoo, and other major search engines since it's launching in 2000. When media contacts want an expert, they come to Bonnie Kaye who has more experience and expertise than any other person in this country. Her official book website is located at www.BonnieKayeBooks.com. Kaye's other books include: "The Gay Husband Checklist for Women Who Wonder; Doomed Grooms: Gay Husbands of Straight Wives; ManReaders: A Woman's Guide to Dysfunctional Men; Straight Wives: Shattered Lives; Bonnie Kaye's Straight Talk;" and "How I Made My Husband Gay: Myths About Straight Wives." With over 30 years experience in business management, Talent Acquisition and Executive Recruitment, Doug Dittmer's career has depended on his ability to coach clients and employees in problem resolution. Eighteen years into his marriage, Doug faced his own crisis and announced that he was gay. In 1981 Doug put his skills to work to fight discrimination against lesbian, gay and bisexual people. Doug began as a Legislative Lobbyist for the Michigan Organization for Human Rights (MOHR), the State's premier gay rights organization. Within a short time he was elected as the group's Education Officer, charged with the responsibility of educating the general public about lesbian and gay issues. Doug went on to be elected President of the organization. Under his leadership, a task force of volunteer litigation attorneys was recruited to overturn Michigan's sodomy statutes. Two years later, in MOHR v. Kelly, MOHR achieved that objective when the Wayne County Circuit Court ruled the statute as unconstitutional. In November 1985, the Detroit City Council recognized his achievements and leadership in the area of human rights by awarding him the Spirit of Detroit Award. Over the years since, Doug has reached out to other gay men coming to terms with their sexuality in mid-life, acting as peer counselor and coach.

Download or read book Is My Husband Gay Straight or Bi written by Joe Kort and published by Rowman & Littlefield. This book was released on 2014-09-11 with total page 241 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Jennifer can’t believe it. Just married and pregnant, she discovers that her husband has been meeting Brad for sex. When confronted, Tom doesn’t deny it, but he insists it’s just “a thing” and he isn’t gay. Elsewhere, John’s wife, Karen, discovers that her husband likes to watch gay porn. John doesn’t understand his wife’s reaction. Why does she care what he watches if he’s not unfaithful? In couple’s therapy, Karen and Jennifer raise the same questions: Does this mean my husband is gay? Can my marriage survive? These and other stories illustrate the difficulties inherent when a wife or girlfriend finds out her man has had or wants to have sexual contact with other men. But many times, the man is not gay or even bisexual. Of course, some men with gay sexual interests are gay men in a process of self-discovery; they are “coming out.” These desires may only reflect a different side of a man’s sexuality or some response to childhood trauma or experiences they have not fully processed. Here Joe Kort and Alexander P. Morgan make the distinction between gay men and “straight men with gay interests” clearer to women who want to know how they can overcome these revelations. The authors explain the many reasons why straight men may be drawn to gay sex; how to tell whether a man is gay, straight, or bisexual; and what the various options are for these couples, who can often go on to have very fulfilling marriages. Is My Husband Gay, Straight or Bi? is intended to help couples understand how male sexuality can express itself in ways that may be difficult to understand. Many marriages have been hurriedly terminated when couples (and their therapists) have lacked the information they needed to understand their current situations. This book provides the clarity, describes the choices, and (in many cases) offers hope for relationships and marriages that have been brushed off as doomed.

Download or read book Doomed Grooms written by Bonnie Kaye and published by CCB Publishing. This book was released on 2012-10-19 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Doomed Grooms: Gay and Bisexual Husbands in Straight Marriages is a self-help book for both women who discover or suspect that their husbands are gay/bisexual and for those men who are ready to come out to their wives. Written by counselor Bonnie Kaye, M.Ed., the international expert in the field of straight/gay marriages, this book is a follow-up to her first book, The Gay Husband Checklist for Women Who Wonder. Topics covered include the loss of women's self and sexual esteem, the effect of the Internet in luring men into the world of homosexuality, the controversy of changing a gay/bisexual husband's sexuality, the mourning stages after a marriage is over, and a list of steps to show women how they can start their journeys to Gay Husband Recovery. Doomed Grooms also contains interviews with past members of Kaye's online support group from different parts of the world, as well as interviews with two gay ex-husbands who explain the dynamics of these marriages. She also shares heartfelt letters from both straight wives and gay husbands to show the emotional impact on both ends. It is estimated that over 4 million women in the United States alone are or have been married to men who are gay/bisexual. Doomed Grooms allows women to come to a sense of closure by helping them understand the different aspects of homosexuality their husbands display. It also helps give validation to the millions who will never get the truth from their husbands in order to help them move on and heal. About the Author Bonnie Kaye is an internationally recognized relationship counselor/author in the field of straight/gay marriages. She has provided relationship counseling and advice for nearly 30 years to more than 75,000 women who have sexually dysfunctional husbands due to homosexuality, bisexuality, or sexual addictions. She is considered an authority in this field by other professionals and the media. Kaye has published seven books on straight/gay relationships, which have sold thousands of copies. Her website www.Gayhusbands.com has consistently remained in the number one position on Google, Yahoo, and other major search engines since its launching in the year 2000. When media contacts want an expert, they go to Bonnie Kaye who has more experience and expertise than any other person in the United States. Her official book website is located at www.BonnieKayeBooks.com. Kaye's support network has over 7,000 women around the world who receive her free monthly newsletter. She also has online computer support chat as well as a weekly internet radio show on Sundays, Straight Wives Talk Show on www.Blogtalkradio.com that can be accessed 24/7 around the world via the computer. Kaye's other books include: The Gay Husband Checklist for Women Who Wonder; Straight Wives: Shattered Lives (Volumes 1 and 2); Manreaders: A Woman's Guide to Dysfunctional Men; Bonnie Kaye's Straight Talk; How I Made My Husband Gay: Myths About Straight Wives; and Over the Cliff: Gay Husbands in Straight Marriages.

Download or read book Finally Out written by Loren A. Olson and published by . This book was released on 2017-04 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dr. Loren A. Olson has frequently been asked two questions: How could you not know that you were gay until the age of forty? Wasn't your marriage just a sham to protect yourself at your wife's expense? In Finally Out, Dr. Olson answers these questions by telling the inspiring story of his evolving sexuality, into which he intelligently weaves psychological concepts and gay history. This book is a powerful exploration of human sexuality, particularly the sexuality of mature men who, like Dr. Olson, lived a large part of their lives as straight men--sometimes long after becoming aware of their same-sex attractions. Readers will come to understand: - That there is no universal model for coming out - Why many older LGBTQ men came out late, do not come out at all, or come out to varying degrees in different environments - How stigma has created mental health problems for isolated and closeted men who have sex with men, particularly in geographical areas and cultures where there is little or no acceptance of homosexuality - How sexual function changes but perhaps even improves for older men - That aging creates opportunities that one has never had and may never have again, e.g., freedom from the tyranny of ambition - That some people consistently prefer an older sexual partner and this can lead to stable, intergenerational relationships - How same-sex sexual activity was considered prior to the Stonewall uprising in 1969 contrasted with the way it is perceived after Stonewall - How age, culture, geographical location, heterosexual marriage, and children impact a person's decision to come out - Why "conversion therapy" does not work and may be harmful - The difference between homophobia and homonaïveté - The archetypes of self-identified straight men who seek occasional or regular sex with other men - How to overcome the shame and guilt experienced by men who are sexually attracted to other men

Download or read book A Pebble in His Shoe written by Dr. Francine Barbetta and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2008-07-23 with total page 169 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This is a captivating journey of a picture-perfect marriage and the devastating effects of a quest for self. Taken from Francine’s heart-wrenching diary, we see Francine, an eternal optimist, and Frank, a dedicated husband and father with a pain too deep to ignore any longer, travel the painful path of a straight spouse and a homosexual husband. As Frank’s repressed urges are aroused, he searches to understand his sexuality, while Francine tries to be supportive as she desperately tries to grasp on to what is slowly slipping away. Francine’s passion for forgiveness gives her courage and great strength to help Frank on his quest.

Download or read book Love What Matters written by LoveWhatMatters and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-05-02 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In the bestselling tradition of The Five People You Meet in Heaven and Humans of New York comes a collection of authentic, emotional, and inspiring stories about life’s most important moments, as curated by the editors at Love What Matters. “90% of the reads bring me to tears. I just can't believe the love this world truly has when all we see is hate. This is so uplifting.” —Shelsea Where do you go when you want to feel inspired? When you want to forget about the divisiveness and the anger? For over five million people, that place is Love What Matters, a digital platform dedicated to finding and sharing the daily moments of kindness, compassion, and love that so often go overlooked. This curated collection of powerful stories features first person accounts and photographs that perfectly capture each moment: A husband learning he’s about to be a dad. A new mom embracing her body. A cashier inadvertently teaching a young girl a lesson about patience. A bagel from a stranger that saved a homeless man’s life. From long overdue adoptions to military heroes returning home; from a fireman’s touching 9/11 tribute to what an old dinner plate found at a bake sale can teach us all about life—these are the moments that matter. They are genuine. Authentic. Raw. And they are perfect in their imperfection—just like all of us. You will no doubt experience goosebumps and tears, but this mosaic of life’s moments will leave you with something even more profound: a reminder that, in the end, love always wins. “This really is the best page on Facebook. It renews your love of humanity. There are still good people. We need more reports of acts of kindness.” —Johnny

Download or read book My Husband Is Gay written by Carol Grever and published by Crossing Press. This book was released on 2012-03-07 with total page 182 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “These women demonstrate the will to survive intact . . . Their passage to wholeness exemplifies forgiveness, growth, healing, hope, and sometimes reconciliation.”—from MY HUSBAND IS GAY Carol and Jim were high school sweethearts who married in their early twenties. Thirty years and two children later, Jim announced to his wife that he was homosexual. A fundamentalist Christian, he had been leading a double life for years. In an effort to sort out her pain and confusion, Carol Grever sought out other heterosexual women, of all ages, ethnicities, and educational backgrounds, who were married to gay men. The stories she uncovered examine their coping strategies and form the basis of this manual for healing.

Download or read book The Other Side of the Closet written by Amity Pierce Buxton and published by Turner Publishing Company. This book was released on 2008-04-21 with total page 303 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Candid, compassionate, authoritative--a rich source of insights, information, and practical guidance. "The first major work on the topic." --Gay Community News "A much needed comprehensive study of what happens to husbands, wives, and children during the coming-out crisis. --The Reverend Jane E. Vennard, founder Task Force for Spouses of Gays and Lesbians "The new enlarged edition adds important factors, especially children's reactions to a parent's coming out. Well-researched and insightful." --Fritz Klein, M.D., author of The Bisexual Option "Anybody practicing in this area would be well advised to read this book." --Professor Arthur S. Leonard, New York Law School In two million marriages, one spouse is gay, lesbian, or bisexual. Having a spouse or parent disclose his or her same-sex attraction is a shattering experience fraught with pain, confusion, anger, and a profound loss of self-esteem. Amity Pierce Buxton spotlights this exploding phenomenon and reports constructive coping strategies that spouses and children have used to resolve problems of sexual damage, family breakdown, deception, and homophobia. Illustrated throughout by riveting personal narratives, this expanded edition of The Other Side of the Closet traces the family's journey from initial trauma to eventual transformation. This invaluable source of information for spouses, families, and professionals is based on Dr. Buxton's eight years of research, including interviews with 1,000 straight spouses and children, her own personal experience, and her counseling work with spouses of gay, lesbian, and bisexual partners.

Download or read book God Believes in Love written by Gene Robinson and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2013-06-04 with total page 210 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the IX Bishop of the Diocese of New Hampshire in the Episcopal Church, the first openly gay person elected to the episcopate and the world’s leading religious spokesperson for gay rights and gay marriage—a groundbreaking book that persuasively makes the case for same-sex marriage using a commonsense, reasoned, religious argument. Robinson holds the religious text of the Bible to be holy and sacred and the ensuing two millennia of church history to be relevant to the discussion. He is equally familiar with the secular and political debate about gay marriage going on in America today, and is someone for whom same-sex marriage is a personal issue; Robinson was married to a woman for fourteen years and is a father of two children and has been married to a man for the last four years of a twenty-five-year relationship. Robinson has a knack for taking complex and controversial issues and addressing them in plain direct language, without using polemics or ideology, putting forth his argument for gay marriage, and bringing together sacred and secular points of view.

Download or read book My Lesbian Husband written by Barrie Jean Borich and published by Graywolf Press. This book was released on 2013-03-12 with total page 298 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "In My Lesbian Husband, Barrie Jean Borich asks a fascinating question: do the names we give our relationships change their meanings? Each chapter entertains an aspect of this question with prose that is spirited, artful, anything but pat. Here is an author who takes neither love nor the power of language for granted, and her book is as provocative and lively as the love it evokes. An extraordinary performance by a writer who renews our wonder at the complexity of human connection."—Bernard Cooper "Barrie Jean Borich wins my respect with her ingenious and original description of feelings which, for many, need translating into a familiar language. She writes about her lover and their life together with a rare deftness, clarity, and antic sense of humor, never strident or defensive, rather self-confident and as if she herself were curious to discover what she is thinking about their relationship."—Rosellen Brown

Download or read book Gay Husbands Straight Wives written by Bonnie Kaye and published by AuthorHouse. This book was released on 2003 with total page 401 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Snow is streaming from the sky as a short yellow school bus pulls up to a red brick building that is well on the plus side of fifty years old. A young girl, approximately ten years old, exits the bus through an open window and runs down the pathway to the building. She hurls herself into the school and within a few feet finds her classroom. The ceiling of the class is gnarled with enormous steam pipes, anywhere from two to twelve inches in diameter. The pipes are already at work, grunting and hissing their way to heating the class. The girl grabs a pair of scissors and opens them at her throat. "I'll kill myself now if you don't sing a song from South Pacific'." The kid's eyes are wild and her greasy hair is matted to her forehead. I begin to hum a few bars of Happy Talk' as I calmly take the scissors from her hands. She quiets down almost immediately. I help her take off her thin coat and note that her feet do not have socks on them. Class has started on a Monday morning in an upstate New York public school. Pipe Dreams: One Teacher's Journey is a nonfiction memoir of an eight-year journey teaching emotionally disturbed children. Written in the first person by their teacher, this unique account is fascinating, humorous, and conveys the inner workings of public school. These kids' lives will engross you and touch your heart.

Download or read book Higher Ground written by Carolyn S. Briggs and published by Rowman & Littlefield Publishers. This book was released on 2011-09-16 with total page 321 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A riveting memoir of one woman's immersion into fundamentalist faith, and her decision twenty years later to leave it all behind. Beautifully written and powerfully told, this memoir is a fascinating look at the nature of faith, and the inspiring story of one woman's struggle to find her place in the world. Originally published as This Dark World, this book has been adapted into the screenplay Higher Ground, now a film directed by and starring Vera Farmiga. Carolyn Briggs grew up with modest means in the Iowa Heartland. Pregnant at seventeen and married to her musician boyfriend, by the age of eighteen she found herself with little hope for the future. Until an unexpected encounter with the Divine. Soon she had immersed herself into a close-knit and patriarchal New Testament church. But as Carolyn began to realize that her religion left little room for what she wanted out of life-as a mother, as a wife, as an intellectually curious woman-cracks began to appear in her all-encompassing sense of faith, and slowly she began to question the religion that had given her hope.

Download or read book The Gay Husband Checklist for Women Who Wonder written by Bonnie Kaye and published by CCB Publishing. This book was released on 2008-07-31 with total page 180 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Gay Husband Checklist for Women Who Wonder is Bonnie Kaye's revised updated version of her first book Is He Straight? A Checklist for Women Who Wonder. The book offers a clear, concise perspective on the topic of straight/gay marriages based on Kaye's own experience plus 25 years of counseling over 35,000 women in the United States and around the world. This is the only book of its kind which contains easy-to-use checklists that outline and reveal the tell-tale signs and personality traits of potentially gay husbands as well as a checklist for the prototype of women they consciously choose as wives. The book will help women work through the emotional turmoil they face when they suspect or learn about this news. About the Author: Bonnie Kaye is recognized as an international expert in this field. She acts as a consultant for major news networks and television shows including Oprah, Montel Williams, and Tyra Banks. Her websites can be viewed at: www.Gayhusbands.com & www.Straightwives.com. Kaye's other books include: Doomed Grooms: Gay Husbands of Straight Wives; ManReaders: A Woman's Guide to Dysfunctional Men; Straight Wives: Shattered Lives; and How I Made My Husband Gay: Myths About Straight Wives.