Download or read book The Santaland Diaries And Season s Greetings written by David Sedaris and published by Dramatists Play Service Inc. This book was released on 1998 with total page 60 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THE STORIES: THE SANTALAND DIARIES is a brilliant evocation of what a slacker's Christmas must feel like. Out of work, our slacker decides to become a Macy's elf during the holiday crunch. At first the job is simply humiliating, but once the thousands of
Download or read book Santaland Diaries written by David Sedaris and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2010-08-05 with total page 89 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collection of surprising, disarming and 'extremely funny' essays from the internationally bestselling author of Me Talk Pretty One Day (Sunday Times) Santaland Diaries collects six of David Sedaris's most profound Christmas stories into one slender volume perfect for use as a last-minute coaster or ice-scraper. This drinking man's companion can be enjoyed by the warmth of a raging fire, the glow of a brilliantly decorated tree, or even in the back seat of a police car. It should be read with your eyes, felt with your heart, and heard only when spoken to. It should, in short, behave much like a book. And oh, what a book it is! 'Sedaris writes with a gentle but unfailing acuity and a keen eye for the ridiculous ... extremely funny' -Sunday Times
Download or read book Holidays on Ice written by David Sedaris and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2009-05-04 with total page 140 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: David Sedaris's beloved holiday collection is new again with six more pieces, including a never before published story. Along with such favoritesas the diaries of a Macy's elf and the annals of two very competitive families, are Sedaris's tales of tardy trick-or-treaters ("Us and Them"); the difficulties of explaining the Easter Bunny to the French ("Jesus Shaves"); what to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm ("Let It Snow"); the puzzling Christmas traditions of other nations ("Six to Eight Black Men"); what Halloween at the medical examiner's looks like ("The Monster Mash"); and a barnyard secret Santa scheme gone awry ("Cow and Turkey"). No matter what your favorite holiday, you won't want to miss celebrating it with the author who has been called "one of the funniest writers alive" (Economist).
Download or read book Santa s Book of Knowledge written by Santa Al Horton and published by AuthorHouse. This book was released on 2011-07-05 with total page 395 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Have you ever thought what the world would be like if I didnt carry that sack and make that sleigh ride each year? I know one thing; there wouldnt be a need for a Naughty and Nice list anymore. Can you imagine all those children and their sad little faces? I could never give up this cause because the children are so angelic with those bright and cheery smiles when they look at you or the presents you leave on Christmas morning. -- Santa Claus
Download or read book Barrel Fever written by David Sedaris and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2010-08-05 with total page 185 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In David Sedaris's world, no one is safe and no cow is sacred. A manic cross between Mark Leyner, Fran Lebowitz and the National Enquirer, Sedaris's collection of stories and essays is a rollicking tour through the American Zeitgeist: a man who is loved too much flees the heavyweight champion of the world; a teenage suicide tried to incite a lynch mob at her funeral; and in his essays, David Sedaris considers the hazards of rewards of smoking, writing for Giantess magazine, and living with his scrappy brother Paul, aka 'The Rooster'. With a perfect eye and a voice infused with as much empathy as wit, Sedaris writes and reads stories and essays that target the soulful ridiculousness of our behaviour. Barrel Fever is like a blind date with modern life - and anything can happen.
Download or read book Theft by Finding written by David Sedaris and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2017-05-30 with total page 508 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One of the most anticipated books of 2017: Boston Globe, New York Times Book Review, New York's "Vulture", The Week, Bustle, BookRiot An NPR Best Book of 2017An AV Club Favorite Book of 2017A Barnes & Noble Best Book of 2017A Goodreads Choice Awards nominee David Sedaris tells all in a book that is, literally, a lifetime in the making. For forty years, David Sedaris has kept a diary in which he records everything that captures his attention-overheard comments, salacious gossip, soap opera plot twists, secrets confided by total strangers. These observations are the source code for his finest work, and through them he has honed his cunning, surprising sentences. Now, Sedaris shares his private writings with the world. Theft by Finding, the first of two volumes, is the story of how a drug-abusing dropout with a weakness for the International House of Pancakes and a chronic inability to hold down a real job became one of the funniest people on the planet. Written with a sharp eye and ear for the bizarre, the beautiful, and the uncomfortable, and with a generosity of spirit that even a misanthropic sense of humor can't fully disguise, Theft By Finding proves that Sedaris is one of our great modern observers. It's a potent reminder that when you're as perceptive and curious as Sedaris, there's no such thing as a boring day.
Download or read book Happy Go Lucky written by David Sedaris and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2022-05-31 with total page 225 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: David Sedaris, the “champion storyteller,” (Los Angeles Times) returns with his first new collection of personal essays since the bestselling Calypso Back when restaurant menus were still printed on paper, and wearing a mask—or not—was a decision made mostly on Halloween, David Sedaris spent his time doing normal things. As Happy-Go-Lucky opens, he is learning to shoot guns with his sister, visiting muddy flea markets in Serbia, buying gummy worms to feed to ants, and telling his nonagenarian father wheelchair jokes. But then the pandemic hits, and like so many others, he’s stuck in lockdown, unable to tour and read for audiences, the part of his work he loves most. To cope, he walks for miles through a nearly deserted city, smelling only his own breath. He vacuums his apartment twice a day, fails to hoard anything, and contemplates how sex workers and acupuncturists might be getting by during quarantine. As the world gradually settles into a new reality, Sedaris too finds himself changed. His offer to fix a stranger’s teeth rebuffed, he straightens his own, and ventures into the world with new confidence. Newly orphaned, he considers what it means, in his seventh decade, no longer to be someone’s son. And back on the road, he discovers a battle-scarred America: people weary, storefronts empty or festooned with Help Wanted signs, walls painted with graffiti reflecting the contradictory messages of our time: Eat the Rich. Trump 2024. Black Lives Matter. In Happy-Go-Lucky, David Sedaris once again captures what is most unexpected, hilarious, and poignant about these recent upheavals, personal and public, and expresses in precise language both the misanthropy and desire for connection that drive us all. If we must live in interesting times, there is no one better to chronicle them than the incomparable David Sedaris.
Download or read book An Old Fashioned Christmas Sweet Traditions for Hearth and Home written by Ellen Stimson and published by The Countryman Press. This book was released on 2015-11-16 with total page 639 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Celebrate the beauty and charm of the holidays with recipes for traditional food and drink, decorating ideas, and heartwarming stories With its trademark snow, piney forests, sleigh rides and woodsmoke curling out of village chimneys, New England was practically invented for the Christmas postcard. It’s got your Christmas goose and the maple syrup with which to glaze it. It’s most of the reason author Ellen Stimson made Vermont her home. Here she shares recipes that have been in her family for generations, mixes up a cocktail or two, and invites readers to make their own traditions.
Download or read book About Christmas written by Nicolae Sfetcu and published by Nicolae Sfetcu. This book was released on 2014-05-01 with total page 394 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Christmas characters and food, Christmas-linked holidays and music, Santa Claus and traditions. Related to Annunciation, Incarnation; Crucifixion; Advent, the four weeks preceding Christmas; and the period between the day after Thanksgiving and the Sunday after New Year”s Day, the American holiday season. Christmas or Christmas Day is a holiday celebrating the birth of Jesus, the central figure of Christianity. Aspects of celebration may include gift-giving, Christmas trees, display of Nativity sets, church attendance, the Father Christmas/Santa Claus myth, and family gatherings. Users of the Gregorian calendar observe the holiday on December 25. Some Eastern Orthodox Churches celebrate on December 25 by the Julian calendar, which currently corresponds to January 7 on the Gregorian calendar. These dates are merely traditional; the great majority of scholars agree that the actual birthdate of Jesus is unknown. In Western culture, the holiday is characterized by the exchange of gifts among friends and family members, some of the gifts being attributed to Santa Claus (also known as Father Christmas, Saint Nicholas, Saint Basil and Father Frost). However, various local and regional Christmas traditions are still practiced, despite the widespread influence of American, British and Australian Christmas motifs disseminated by film, popular literature, television, and other media.
Download or read book The Book of Liz written by Amy Sedaris and published by Dramatists Play Service Inc. This book was released on 2002 with total page 60 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THE STORY: Sister Elizabeth Donderstock is Squeamish, has been her whole life. She makes cheese balls (traditional and smoky) that sustain the existence of her entire religious community, Clusterhaven. However, she feels unappreciated among her Squ
Download or read book The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told written by Paul Rudnick and published by Dramatists Play Service Inc. This book was released on 1999 with total page 108 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THE STORY: A stage manager, headset and prompt book at hand, brings the house lights to half, then dark, and cues the creation of the world. Throughout the play, she's in control of everything. In other words, she's either God, or she thinks she is
Download or read book Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk written by David Sedaris and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2010-09-28 with total page 122 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Featuring David Sedaris's unique blend of hilarity and heart, this new collection of keen-eyed animal-themed tales is an utter delight. Though the characters may not be human, the situations in these stories bear an uncanny resemblance to the insanity of everyday life. In "The Toad, the Turtle, and the Duck," three strangers commiserate about animal bureaucracy while waiting in a complaint line. In "Hello Kitty," a cynical feline struggles to sit through his prison-mandated AA meetings. In "The Squirrel and the Chipmunk," a pair of star-crossed lovers is separated by prejudiced family members. With original illustrations by Ian Falconer, author of the bestselling Olivia series of children's books, these stories are David Sedaris at his most observant, poignant, and surprising.
Download or read book Children Playing Before a Statue of Hercules written by David Sedaris and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2010-04-01 with total page 472 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 'When apple-picking season ended, I got a Job in a packing plant and gravitated towards short stories, which I could read during my break and reflect upon for the remainder of my shift. A good one would take me out of myself and then stuff me back in, outsized, now, and uneasy with the fit . . . Once, before leaving on vacation, I copied an entire page from an Alice Munro story and left it in my typewriter, hoping a burglar might come upon it and mistake her words for my own. That an intruder would spend his valuable time reading, that he might be impressed by the description of a crooked face, was something I did not question, as I believed, and still do, that stories can save you'.
Download or read book Openhearted written by Ann Ingle and published by Penguin UK. This book was released on 2021-09-23 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: SHORTLISTED FOR TWO IRISH BOOK AWARDS 2021 'Something they don't tell you about getting older is that you fall. Oh, you hear about it in passing, of course, "She had a fall, poor thing". Falling is not something you ever think about as a younger woman. You think about falling in love . . .' At 20 Londoner Ann Ingle fell madly in love with an Irish fellow she met on holiday in Cornwall. At the church to arrange their shotgun wedding she discovered that he hadn't even told her his real name. Sixty-odd years later Ann looks back on that first glorious fall and in a series of essays considers what she has learned from the life that followed - bringing eight children into the world, their father's years of mental illness and tragic death at 40, being a cash-strapped single mother in 1980s Dublin, coming into her own in her middle years - going to college, working and writing, and continuing to evolve and learn into her ninth decade, even as she accepts the realities of being 'old'. Candid about everything that matters - love, sex, heartbreak, money, class, religion, mental health, rearing children (and letting them go), reading and writing, ageing - Openhearted is a compelling story about living life in a spirit of curiosity and delight and with a willingness to look for good in others. ___________________ 'By some distance the most courageous, most poignant, most life-affirming memoir I've read in the last twenty years and more' Paul Howard 'Genuinely inspirational. I LOVE ANN INGLE' Marian Keyes 'What a beautiful openhearted, at times broken-hearted memoir ... honest, funny, searingly direct, a wonderful voice ... remarkable' Joe Duffy 'Really beautiful. Searingly honest, astonishingly frank and very, very funny' Maia Dunphy
Download or read book The Autobiography of Santa Claus written by Jeff Guinn and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2006-10-19 with total page 212 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It all started when Jeff Guinn was assigned to write a piece full of little-known facts about Christmas for his paper, The Fort Worth Star-Telegram. A few months later, he received a call from a gentleman who told him that he showed the story to an important friend who didn’t think much of it. And who might that be? asked Jeff. The next thing he knew, he was whisked off to the North Pole to meet with this “very important friend,” and the rest is, well, as they say, history. An enchanting holiday treasure, The Autobiography of Santa Claus combines solid historical fact with legend to deliver the definitive story of Santa Claus. And who better to lead us through seventeen centuries of Christmas magic than good ol’ Saint Nick himself? Families will delight in each chapter of this new Christmas classic—one per each cold December night leading up to Christmas!
Download or read book Complete Works of William Shakespeare abridged revised again written by Adam Long and published by Hal Leonard Corporation. This book was released on 2023-09-15 with total page 80 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Originally performed by its creators, this 1987 Edinburgh Fringe hit remains the second longest-running West End comedy in history and has been translated into over thirty languages. The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged) is not so much a play as it is a vaudeville show in which three charismatic, wildly ambitious actors attempt to present all thirty-seven of Shakespeare's plays in a single performance. They have a rudimentary concept of the stories and have imperfectly memorized a smattering of famous lines. Backstage there's a meager assortment of costumes and props. Thus armed, the three brazenly launch into their task with an earnest focus and breakneck enthusiasm.
Download or read book The Santa Suit written by Mary Kay Andrews and published by St. Martin's Press. This book was released on 2021-09-28 with total page 147 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From Mary Kay Andrews, the New York Times bestselling author of Hello, Summer, comes a novella celebrating the magic of Christmas and second chances in The Santa Suit. When newly-divorced Ivy Perkins buys an old farmhouse sight unseen, she is definitely looking for a change in her life. The Four Roses, as the farmhouse is called, is a labor of love—but Ivy didn't bargain on just how much labor. The previous family left so much furniture and so much junk, that it's a full-time job sorting through all of it. At the top of a closet, Ivy finds an old Santa suit—beautifully made and decades old. In the pocket of a suit she finds a note written in a childish hand: it's from a little girl who has one Christmas wish, and that is for her father to return home from the war. This discovery sets Ivy off on a mission. Who wrote the note? Did the man ever come home? What mysteries did the Rose family hold? Ivy's quest brings her into the community, at a time when all she wanted to do was be left alone and nurse her wounds. But the magic of Christmas makes miracles happen, and Ivy just might find more than she ever thought possible: a welcoming town, a family reunited, a mystery solved, and a second chance at love.
