Download or read book The Mammoth Book of Filthy Limericks written by Glyn Rees and published by Running Press. This book was released on 2009-12-22 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This hilariously inappropriate collection of rhymes is sure to provide ammunition to use at the office or even at a party among friends. You'll never have to repeat a line from this collection of more than 2,000 dirty verses. Perfect for St. Patty's Day or any time year-round!

Download or read book The Mammoth Book of Limericks written by Glyn Rees and published by Running Press. This book was released on 2008-10-28 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This is the best-ever collection of those catchy Irish rhymes – from squeaky-clean to the moderately filthy. With over 2,000 silly, political, modern, classic, and more to choose from, there is bound to be a limerick to get you giggling. This giant collection includes Irish classics called out in corner pubs for decades as well as many new verses specifically created to be read here. Creators include Spike Milligan, Mark Twain, Michael Palin, Lewis Carroll, Isaac Asimov, Robert Louis Stevenson, Rudyard Kipling, W.H. Auden, and many, many more.

Download or read book The Onion Presents A Book of Jean s Own written by Jean Teasdale and published by St. Martin's Griffin. This book was released on 2010-10-12 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A few words from the author and eponymous columnist behind The Onion's column, "A Room of Jean's Own," Jean Teasdale: Hi Jeanketeers and Jeanketeers-to-be!! As The Onion's very own Humor and Human-Interest columnist, I've been entertaining readers for 15 years with kooky tales of life with my hubby and our two feline children. Now for the first time, li'l ol' me shines front-and-center in a book of my very own! A Book of Jean's Own! features all-original, never-before-published material, and if that wasn't impressive enough, marks the very first Onion book by a solo writer! Historical, huh? My book is sure to find an eager audience among The Onion's ten-million-strong readership. Wait, ten million people? I had no idea! Frankly, that scares me a little. We're not in Kansas anymore, Toto! (Oh shoot, I should have put that hilarious phrase in my book!) A Book of Jean's Own! also marks a departure from past Onion books in that it isn't crammed with headlines and articles in teeny-weeny print! Instead, I write about the stuff that really matters: shopping, chocolate, part-time jobs, and hot Hollywood hunks! Whether you read my book on the bus, the beach, or the toilet, you're guaranteed to find something to chuckle at and deeply relate to! Among the many nuggets of fun: * I tell you the Twenty Things That Are Better Than Sex! * For the first time ever, you learn my maiden name! * I spill the secrets of my scrumptious chocolate-loaded desserts, such as Ooey Gooey Choco-Cocoa-Mocha Cupcakes With Raspberry Filling And Coconut-Cream Cheese-Cola Frosting! * Acquire valuable, real-world tips on coping with a job you dislike, getting through those rough teenage years, and styling a Jean hairdo of your very own! * Get a giggle out of my doodles and overdose on the words of wisdom that are my Jean Proverbs! * You've heard of pity parties—get my tips for throwing your very own self-pity party! * Check out my own cure for the blues, the Plush Jamboree! * Witness my nervous breakdown while writing this book (well, writing is hard, after all!) * Also for the first time ever, Hubby Rick speaks! (Spoiler: It's not entirely in grunts!) * Lots of exclamation points! (And phrases in parentheses!) I'm sure every single one of those ten million readers will buy my book! And who knows? They just may find something in it that will help them lead happier and better lives!

Download or read book A Sackful of Limericks written by Michael Palin and published by Random House. This book was released on 2016-10-06 with total page 96 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If you've ever wondered what happened to the young fellow from Malta who bought his grandfather an altar... If you're concerned about the camper called Jack who found a huge snake in his pack... And if you suspect that an eccentric landowner called Grey spent Christmas a very strange way but aren't sure precisely what that entailed... Then a dip into Michael Palin's Sackful of Limericks will provide all the answers – and a lot of fun besides.

Download or read book The Crossover written by Kwame Alexander and published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. This book was released on 2014 with total page 245 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New York Times bestseller ∙ Newbery Medal Winner ∙Coretta Scott King Honor Award ∙2015 YALSA 2015 Top Ten Best Fiction for Young Adults∙ 2015 YALSA Quick Picks for Reluctant Young Adult Readers ∙Publishers Weekly Best Book ∙ School Library Journal Best Book∙ Kirkus Best Book "A beautifully measured novel of life and line."--The New York Times Book Review "With a bolt of lightning on my kicks . . .The court is SIZZLING. My sweat is DRIZZLING. Stop all that quivering. Cuz tonight I'm delivering, " announces dread-locked, 12-year old Josh Bell. He and his twin brother Jordan are awesome on the court. But Josh has more than basketball in his blood, he's got mad beats, too, that tell his family's story in verse, in this fast and furious middle grade novel of family and brotherhood from Kwame Alexander. Josh and Jordan must come to grips with growing up on and off the court to realize breaking the rules comes at a terrible price, as their story's heart-stopping climax proves a game-changer for the entire family.

Download or read book Out Of Control written by Kevin Kelly and published by Basic Books. This book was released on 2009-04-30 with total page 528 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Out of Control chronicles the dawn of a new era in which the machines and systems that drive our economy are so complex and autonomous as to be indistinguishable from living things.

Download or read book The Great British Limerick Book written by Lewis Williams, Ass and published by . This book was released on 2015-04-16 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Surely it can't be done. But it has been done. For the first time in the history of mankind someone has been dedicated enough and fool enough to write a filthy limerick for every town in the UK which unlike Leeds or Devizes doesn't already have a classic filthy limerick to call its own. From Land's End to John o' Groats, The Great British Limerick Book has a filthy limerick for your town, for your uncle's town, for your cousin's husband's ex-wife's town .... as long as it's in the UK and as long as it isn't one of those few places that are really impossible to find a rhyme for. There are over 900 limericks in the book. A lot of them are hilarious. Most of them are very funny. All of them are filthy. Guildford, Surrey. At McDonald's in Guildford in Surrey, I spilt coffee on my crotch in a scurry, I had to act quick, To cool down my dick, So I stuck it into my McFlurry. Nuneaton, Warwickshire. There was a young man from Nuneaton, Who really enjoyed being beaten, And squeezing his knackers, With a pair of nut crackers, And riding a bike with no seat on. Bath, Somerset. There was a professor from Bath, Who employed twenty-five research staff, To measure size and direction, Of his every erection, And to plot the results on a graph. The Isle of Skye, Scotland. When I was on the Isle of Skye, I overdid the old Spanish fly, I had a stiff member, From the fourth of December, Till Friday the tenth of July. Ashington, Northumberland. In Ashington there was a miner, Whose wife was a fashion designer, One night to his shock, She dressed him up as a cock, And herself as a six foot vagina. Hackney, Greater London. As a chemist I worked once in Hackney, And invented a treatment for acne, But one ingredi-ent, Was semen I'd spent, And they thought that good reason to sack me.

Download or read book Environmental education in the schools creating a program that works written by and published by DIANE Publishing. This book was released on with total page 333 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book The Little Book of Rude Limericks written by Patricia Feinberg Stoner and published by . This book was released on 2017 with total page 49 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book The Mammoth Book of Limericks written by Glyn Rees and published by Constable. This book was released on 2008 with total page 589 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The most enduringly popular poetical verse form in the English language is very much alive and well. This monster volume of 2,000 limericks ranges from clean to (moderately) filthy, all guaranteed to make you laugh! It contains limericks that are historical, geographical, whimsical, clerical, medical and many more. This giant collection includes limericks by such names as Edward Lear, Isaac Asimov, Robert Louis Stevenson, Rudyard Kipling, William Shakespeare, H.G. Wells, John Betjeman, Ogden Nash, Spike Milligan, and others. As well as a treasure trove of completely new and original verse, generated specially for this volume. You'll find plenty of modern gems - limericks relevant to today's world, such as computers, mobile phones, foreign travel, traffic congestion, unfair taxation, the cult of celebrity, overpaid sports players, environmental issues. Plus 'old favourites' in every category you can think of, including: Limerick limericks, Family, Children's limericks (for children and by children), Food and Drink, Sporty, Clever (including tongue twisters), Silly, Arty, Animal, Showbiz (including theatre, film and TV), Musical, Medical, Historical, Miscellaneous (including royalty, travel, occupations, college, crime, fashion, politics, celebrity, garden and religion), Memorial, Naughty, and Naughtier.

Download or read book The Mating Mind written by Geoffrey Miller and published by Anchor. This book was released on 2011-12-21 with total page 530 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: At once a pioneering study of evolution and an accessible and lively reading experience, a book that offers the most convincing—and radical—explanation for how and why the human mind evolved. Consciousness, morality, creativity, language, and art: these are the traits that make us human. Scientists have traditionally explained these qualities as merely a side effect of surplus brain size, but Miller argues that they were sexual attractors, not side effects. He bases his argument on Darwin’ s theory of sexual selection, which until now has played second fiddle to Darwin’ s theory of natural selection, and draws on ideas and research from a wide range of fields, including psychology, economics, history, and pop culture. Witty, powerfully argued, and continually thought-provoking, The Mating Mind is a landmark in our understanding of our own species.

Download or read book The Book of a Thousand Laughs written by O. U. Schweinickle and published by Library of Alexandria. This book was released on with total page 265 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Caught ya Again written by Jane Bell Kiester and published by Maupin House Publishing, Inc.. This book was released on 2013 with total page 308 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Holy Moldy Bread Contest! Kiester strikes again with four more stories plus mini-lessons, writing workshops, and a complete grammar reference. Solid classroom-proven techniques turn students into better writers. Includes teacher keys, tests, and special notes for the home school teacher. A time-saver that really works!

Download or read book Dirty Sick X Rated and Politically Incorrect Jokes written by Geoff Tibballs and published by Constable. This book was released on 2005-10-13 with total page 512 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Mammoth Book of Dirty, Sick, X-Rated and Politically Incorrect Jokes is the ultimate collection of X-rated and decidedly politically incorrect jokes - an indispensable guide to the funny, the fearless and the filthy. Be warned, the contents of this spanking new bumper book are not for the faint-hearted. Even a blonde would blush ...if she got any of them.

Download or read book The World of Words written by Margaret Ann Richek and published by . This book was released on 1996 with total page 436 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book The Best of Sickipedia written by Ivor Hugh Jardon and published by CreateSpace. This book was released on 2014-02-11 with total page 164 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "It's the perfect present for that rich granny with a heart condition." "This book will give you the best chat in the pub, dazzle dates in fancy restaurants, and provide endless family entertainment at Christmas." "Just what the doctor ordered. Funny as hell from start to finish." This book is a selection of some of the best jokes which have been hand picked from a collection of over 300,000 jokes from Sickipedia - the world's top joke website. The jokes contained within these pages are sick, rude, politically incorrect, offensive, obscene and in some cases Just Wrong, but the end results are Funny and Hilarious. All of the jokes are submitted by the general public to Sickipedia. Every time there is a big story - say a murder or a disaster, following the news comes the jokes. Psychologists probably have something to say about this, but not us, we just want to be the number one place for finding, recording and disseminating this material. WARNING: The content of this book is packed full of inappropriate material. It is definitely NOT suitable for children or the easily offended. Within these pages are jokes about religion, racism, crime and illegal sex acts. Remember what you read are not points of view; they are just jokes - nothing more! Here's a selection of what topics to expect! Some Top Jokes The Sickipedia 10 Commandments Crime The Police Sex Crimes Drink & Drugs Theft Murder Other Crimes What Not to Say on a First Date Illness and Mortality Cancer AIDS & Other STD's Alzheimer/Dementia Disabilities Death The Sickipedians Guide to Britishness Racism The British Chavs, Pikeys and Gypsies The Scottish The Welsh The Irish Europe Americans Asian Indians & Pakistanis Black Excuses for being late Religion Christianity Catholics Jewish Other Religions Good news. Bad News Sex and Shit Sex The Wife Blondes The Rules! Other Football Wordplay One-Liners Misunderstandings Limericks

Download or read book Giggles in the Middle written by Jane Bell Kiester and published by Maupin House Publishing, Inc.. This book was released on 2013 with total page 420 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Jane Bell Kiester, author of the popular Caught'ya! Grammar with a Giggle series, has adapted her effective and fun approach to meet the specific learning needs of middle-school students. This resource improves writing and editing skills, raises test scores, engages students, and creates classrooms filled with giggles! Giggles in the Middle offers middle-school teachers all the benefits of the previous Caught'ya! books, plus some helpful "extras" created especially for the middle-school student. You'll find: One continuous story, "The Bizarre Mystery of Horribly Hard Middle School," divided into three parts, each with enough sentences for an entire school year; Classroom-tested writing assignment suggestions, mini-lessons, and teaching tips; "Almost-midterm" and final exam tests for each grade, with teacher keys; Easy-to-follow, step-by-step instructions; Complete vocabulary lists for words used in each story; and A CD with the Grammar, Usage, and Mechanics Guide for easy reference and duplication; the complete, uninterrupted story in narrative form; and the Caught'ya! sentences. Giggles in the Middle gives middle-school teachers the perfect alternative to boring grammar books and dry lectures. With this flexible, proven approach to developing grammar, usage, and mechanics (GUM) skills, as well as vocabulary, everyone has fun while they learn!