Download or read book Rules of Estrangement written by Joshua Coleman, PhD and published by Random House. This book was released on 2024-09-03 with total page 337 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A guide for parents whose adult children have cut off contact that reveals the hidden logic of estrangement, explores its cultural causes, and offers practical advice for parents trying to reestablish contact with their adult children. “Finally, here’s a hopeful, comprehensive, and compassionate guide to navigating one of the most painful experiences for parents and their adult children alike.”—Lori Gottlieb, psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone Labeled a silent epidemic by a growing number of therapists and researchers, estrangement is one of the most disorienting and painful experiences of a parent's life. Popular opinion typically tells a one-sided story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents. However, the reasons for estrangement are far more complex and varied. As a result of rising rates of individualism, an increasing cultural emphasis on happiness, growing economic insecurity, and a historically recent perception that parents are obstacles to personal growth, many parents find themselves forever shut out of the lives of their adult children and grandchildren. As a trusted psychologist whose own daughter cut off contact for several years and eventually reconciled, Dr. Joshua Coleman is uniquely qualified to guide parents in navigating these fraught interactions. He helps to alleviate the ongoing feelings of shame, hurt, guilt, and sorrow that commonly attend these dynamics. By placing estrangement into a cultural context, Dr. Coleman helps parents better understand the mindset of their adult children and teaches them how to implement the strategies for reconciliation and healing that he has seen work in his forty years of practice. Rules of Estrangement gives parents the language and the emotional tools to engage in meaningful conversation with their child, the framework to cultivate a healthy relationship moving forward, and the ability to move on if reconciliation is no longer possible. While estrangement is a complex and tender topic, Dr. Coleman's insightful approach is based on empathy and understanding for both the parent and the adult child.

Download or read book Discovering the Inner Mother written by Bethany Webster and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2021-01-05 with total page 304 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Sure to become a classic on female empowerment, a groundbreaking exploration of the personal, cultural, and global implications of intergenerational trauma created by patriarchy, how it is passed down from mothers to daughters, and how we can break this destructive cycle. Why do women keep themselves small and quiet? Why do they hold back professionally and personally? What fuels the uncertainty and lack of confidence so many women often feel? In this paradigm-shifting book, leading feminist thinker Bethany Webster identifies the source of women’s trauma. She calls it the Mother Wound—the systemic disenfranchisement of women by the patriarchy—and reveals how this cycle is perpetuated by wounded mothers who unconsciously pass on damaging beliefs and behaviors to their daughters. In her workshops, online courses, and talks, Webster has helped countless women re-examine their lives and their relationships with their mothers, giving them the vocabulary to voice their pain, and encouraging them to share their experiences. In this manifesto and self-help guide, she offers practical tools for identifying the manifestations of the Mother Wound in our daily life and strategies we can use to heal ourselves and prevent our daughters from enduring the same pain. In addition, she offers step-by-step advice on how to reconnect with our inner child, grieve the mother we didn’t have, stop people-pleasing, and, ultimately, transform our heartache and anger into healing and self-love. Revealing how women are affected by the Mother Wound, even if they don’t personally identify as survivors, Discovering the Inner Mother revolutionizes how we view mother-daughter relationships and gives us the inspiration and guidance we need to improve our lives and ultimately create a more equitable society for all.

Download or read book Family Estrangement written by Kylie Agllias and published by Routledge. This book was released on 2016-10-04 with total page 254 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Family estrangement is larger than conflict and more complicated than betrayal. It is entwined in contradictory beliefs, values, behaviours and goals and is the result of at least one member of the family considering reconciliation impossible and/or undesirable. The cessation of familial relations, whether that involves rejection or deciding to leave, can be an inordinately traumatising experience. Whilst data suggests that around 1 in 12 people are estranged from at least one family member this topic is rarely discussed or researched. Based on the author’s in-depth research and exploration of the topic of estrangement, Family Estrangement: A Matter of Perspective captures the unique lived experiences of both estrangee and estranger. Offering multiple perspectives drawn from academic and popular literature as well as case studies, the book contextualises its chapters within current theoretical understandings of family relationships and estrangement, including Loss and Grief theories, Attachment Theory and Bowen Family Systems Theory. Practice sections provide estranged readers and professionals with a structured approach to exploring the various aspects of estrangement within a family and to help them identify resilience, strengths and strategies which individuals may harness as they attempt to live with estrangement. Written with the aim to provide guidance in understanding estrangement in context, this book is suitable for estranged family members and all professionals who encounter and work with people affected by estrangement, including social workers, counsellors, psychologists, allied health professionals, doctors, nurses and legal professions.

Download or read book Brothers Sisters Strangers written by Fern Schumer Chapman and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2021-04-06 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A warm, empathetic guide to understanding, coping with, and healing from the unique pain of sibling estrangement "Whenever I tell people that I am working on a book about sibling estrangement, they sit up a little straighter and lean in, as if I've tapped into a dark secret." Fern Schumer Chapman understands the pain of sibling estrangement firsthand. For the better part of forty years, she had nearly no relationship with her only brother, despite many attempts at reconnection. Her grief and shame were devastating and isolating. But when she tried to turn to others for help, she found that a profound stigma still surrounded estrangement, and that very little statistical and psychological research existed to help her better understand the rift that had broken up her family. So she decided to conduct her own research, interviewing psychologists and estranged siblings as well as recording the extraordinary story of her own rift with her brother--and subsequent reconciliation. Brothers, Sisters, Strangers is the result--a thoughtfully researched memoir that illuminates both the author's own story and the greater phenomenon of estrangement. Chapman helps readers work through the challenges of rebuilding a sibling relationship that seems damaged beyond repair, as well as understand when estrangement is the best option. It is at once a detailed framework for understanding sibling estrangement, a beacon of solidarity and comfort for the estranged, and a moving memoir about family trauma, addiction, grief, and recovery.

Download or read book Fault Lines written by Karl Pillemer, Ph.D. and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2022-11-01 with total page 289 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Real solutions to a hidden epidemic: family estrangement. Estrangement from a family member is one of the most painful life experiences. It is devastating not only to the individuals directly involved--collateral damage can extend upward, downward, and across generations, More than 65 million Americans suffer such rifts, yet little guidance exists on how to cope with and overcome them. In this book, Karl Pillemer combines the advice of people who have successfully reconciled with powerful insights from social science research. The result is a unique guide to mending fractured families. Fault Lines shares for the first time findings from Dr. Pillemer's ten-year groundbreaking Cornell Reconciliation Project, based on the first national survey on estrangement; rich, in-depth interviews with hundreds of people who have experienced it; and insights from leading family researchers and therapists. He assures people who are estranged, and those who care about them, that they are not alone and that fissures can be bridged. Through the wisdom of people who have "been there," Fault Lines shows how healing is possible through clear steps that people can use right away in their own families. It addresses such questions as: How do rifts begin? What makes estrangement so painful? Why is it so often triggered by a single event? Are you ready to reconcile? How can you overcome past hurts to build a new future with a relative? Tackling a subject that is achingly familiar to almost everyone, especially in an era when powerful outside forces such as technology and mobility are lessening family cohesion, Dr. Pillemer combines dramatic stories, science-based guidance, and practical repair tools to help people find the path to reconciliation.

Download or read book Estranged Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart written by Julie Plagens and published by Independently Published. This book was released on 2019-02-27 with total page 158 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In Estranged: Finding Hope When Your Family Falls Apart, Julie Plagens shares about her life as a child of well-known parents in full-time ministry and the hardships it puts on families to maintain an image of perfection. After many years of anger and unforgiveness, Julie and her husband walked away from the family to find healing after a life-altering health diagnosis. This is the amazing story of how God knitted a Christian family back together through a series of miracles that can only be explained by divine intervention after seven years of estrangement. This book is written for families who are struggling to get along in a healthy manner all the way to those who are experiencing a full-blown family estrangement. Julie gives her story from the perspective of an estranged adult child but also gives tips for parents and adult children who are struggling to find a connection between the two generations. Julie's mother, Joanne Ventura, wrote the afterword to help parents who are struggling with the rejection of their adult children. Estranged is unique in that it not only gives personal stories from both sides of the estrangement (which is rare), but it also gives tips to help families move towards hope and healing, even if there is never reconciliation. This is a must read for anyone dealing with shame, anger, rejection, and unforgiveness. You can find hope when your family falls apart.

Download or read book Navigating Family Estrangement written by Karl Melvin and published by Taylor & Francis. This book was released on 2024-06-28 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Family estrangement and the stigma attached to it are complex phenomena affecting a great number of people in various ways. In response, Navigating Family Estrangement offers a deep dive into the reality of being estranged in contemporary society. This practical guide looks at how to effectively help estranged adults achieve better outcomes from a variety of perspectives. The author explores the difficulties of working with estrangement, including professional roadblocks such as the six biases that prevent connecting with a client's experience. He delves into the unique seven-step Estrangement Inquiry Model that aims to provide important insight into a client's family history, map out the present estrangement dynamic, and highlight the types of interventions to support their needs. Combining research from a range of different fields with the author's decade of clinical experience, the book is supplemented with five comprehensive case studies to demonstrate the practical strategies that address estrangement challenges. This book offers a clear and collaborative approach to a topic that will be relevant for a range of professionals, including psychotherapists, psychologists, counsellors and social workers.

Download or read book A Little Life written by Hanya Yanagihara and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2016-01-26 with total page 833 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A stunning “portrait of the enduring grace of friendship” (NPR) about the families we are born into, and those that we make for ourselves. A masterful depiction of love in the twenty-first century. NATIONAL BOOK AWARD FINALIST • MAN BOOKER PRIZE FINALIST • WINNER OF THE KIRKUS PRIZE A Little Life follows four college classmates—broke, adrift, and buoyed only by their friendship and ambition—as they move to New York in search of fame and fortune. While their relationships, which are tinged by addiction, success, and pride, deepen over the decades, the men are held together by their devotion to the brilliant, enigmatic Jude, a man scarred by an unspeakable childhood trauma. A hymn to brotherly bonds and a masterful depiction of love in the twenty-first century, Hanya Yanagihara’s stunning novel is about the families we are born into, and those that we make for ourselves. Look for Hanya Yanagihara’s latest bestselling novel, To Paradise.

Download or read book Families We Keep written by Rin Reczek and published by NYU Press. This book was released on 2022-05-17 with total page 270 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why LGBTQ adults don’t end troubled ties with parents and why (perhaps) they should Families We Keep is a surprising look at the life-long bonds between LGBTQ adults and their parents. Alongside the importance of “chosen families” in the queer community, Rin Reczek and Emma Bosley-Smith found that very few LGBTQ people choose to become estranged from their parents, even if those parent refuse to support their gender identity, sexuality, or both. Drawing on interviews with over seventy-five LGBTQ people and their parents, Reczek and Bosley-Smith explore the powerful ties that bind families together, for better or worse. They show us why many feel obliged to maintain even troubled—and sometimes outright toxic—relationships with their parents. They argue that this relationship persists because what we think of as the “natural” and inevitable connection between parents and adult children is actually created and sustained by the sociocultural power of compulsory kinship. After revealing what holds even the most troubled intergenerational ties together, Families We Keep gives us permission to break free of those family bonds that are not in our best interests. Reczek and Bosley-Smith challenge our deep-rooted conviction that family—and specifically, our relationships with our parents—should be maintained at any cost. Families We Keep shines a light on the shifting importance of family in America, and how LGBTQ people navigate its complexities as adults.

Download or read book Connection Parenting written by Pam Leo and published by . This book was released on 2007 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The author believes that every child's greatest emotional need is to have a strong emotional bond with at least one adult. When we have a bond with a child we have influence with a child. The author teaches us that when we strengthen our parent-child bond we meet the child's need for connection and our need for influence.--From back cover.

Download or read book Family Estrangements written by Barbara LeBey and published by Bantam. This book was released on 2003-01-01 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Mending the Ties That Bind Divorce; disputes over inheritances, family business, or elder care. Rifts over marriage partners, career choices, or sexual orientation--these are just some of the many ways that even close families can break apart. Yet this all-too-common and often devastating family problem, and its emotional fallout, has gone virtually unaddressed…until now. In this remarkable book, Barbara LeBey, an Atlanta attorney and former judge, who herself suffered and resolved a family estrangement, shares the stories of people from every walk of life and of every age and race, to show how such rifts often begin and how they can usually be resolved. Working closely with two family therapists, LeBey offers a set of tested guidelines to help you approach alienated or angry family members, deal with your own issues, and mend your broken family relationships--even if you think it may already be too late. Compassionate, practical, and full of rich insight, this book is a beacon of hope and healing to which families everywhere will turn again and again.

Download or read book Reconnecting with Your Estranged Adult Child written by Tina Gilbertson and published by New World Library. This book was released on 2020-04-28 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Parents whose adult children have cut off contact wonder: How did this happen? Where did I go wrong? What happened to my loving child? Over time, holidays, birthdays, and even the birth of grandchildren may pass in silence. Anguish may turn into anger. While time, in and of itself, does not necessarily heal, actions do, and while every estrangement includes situation-specific variables, there are practical, effective, and universal techniques for understanding and healing these not-uncommon breaches. Psychotherapist Tina Gilbertson has developed these techniques and tools over years of face-to-face and online work with parents, who have found her strategies transformative and even life-changing. Gilbertson cuts through the blame, shame, and guilt on both sides of the broken relationship. Parents will feel heard and understood but also challenged — and guided — to reclaim their role as"tone setter" and grow psychologically. Exercises, examples, and sample scripts empower parents who have felt powerless. Gilbertson shows that reconciliation is a step-by-step process, but the effort is well worth it. It is never too late to renew relations and experience better-than-ever bonds.

Download or read book Done With The Crying written by Sheri McGregor and published by . This book was released on 2016-04-30 with total page 351 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In this encouraging book, Sheri McGregor helps parents of estranged adult children break free from emotional pain and move forward in their lives. With the latest research, her own experience, and insight from more than 9,000 parents, McGregor covers the growing trend of estranged adults from loving families. Devastated parents can be happy again.

Download or read book Narrating Estrangement written by Lisa P. Z. Spinazola and published by Taylor & Francis. This book was released on 2022-05-09 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The stories in Narrating Estrangement: Autoethnographies of Writing Of(f) Family demonstrate the pain, anguish, and even relief felt by those who contemplate estranging or who are estranged, whether by choice or circumstance. Despite the social assumptions persisting about the everlasting nature of family relationships, when people make the complicated and often difficult decision to disconnect from family members, they experience shame, stigma, and isolation because of social pressures to maintain those relationships at all costs. Each contributor uses the act of storytelling and the autoethnographic mode of scholarship and writing to find clarity in their individual, unique, and complex situations. Several authors’ explorations restore some of what they have lost through estrangement—such as a sense of identity, emotional health and well-being, and feelings of belonging—due to the breakdowns in social and family support systems meant to be unconditional and "permanent." The stories display the wide array of reasons why family members become estranged, delving into different types of estrangement, permanent and/or intermittent. In doing so, the writers in this book demonstrate that family relationships are neither easily categorized nor neatly ended—their impact on an individual’s life continues and changes, even in and through estrangement. This book adds to the ongoing scholarly conversations about family estrangement for students and researchers interested in autoethnography and qualitative inquiry, in a wide range of disciplines in the social sciences, healthcare, and communication studies.

Download or read book How to Love Difficult Parents written by Jim Newheiser and published by New Growth Press. This book was released on 2021-08-23 with total page 12 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: We are used to having our parents help us, but how do we handle it when the tables are turned and our parents are the ones who need help? Declining health, financial needs, divorce, relational issues—what’s an adult child’s role when their parents are struggling? Counselor Jim Newheiser understands the many types of challenges adults may face ...

Download or read book Home Will Never Be the Same Again written by Carol R. Hughes and published by Rowman & Littlefield. This book was released on 2020-06-22 with total page 286 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Adult children are often overlooked and forgotten when their parents divorce later in life, but in these pages they will find comfort and understanding for the many feelings, frustrations, and challenges they face. For more than two decades, a silent revolution has been occurring and creating a seismic shift in the American family and families in other countries. It has been unfolding without much comment, and its effects are being felt across three to four generations: more couples are divorcing later in life. Called the “gray divorce revolution,” the cultural phenomenon describes couples who divorce after the age of 50. Overlooked in the issues that affect couples divorcing later in in life are the adult children of divorcing parents. Their voices open this book, and they are the voices of men and women, 18 to 50 years old. Some of them are single; some are married. Some have children of their own. All of them are in different stages of shock, fear, and sudden, dramatic change. In Home Will Never Be the Same: A Guide for Adult Children of Gray Divorce, Carol Hughes and Bruce Fredenburg share their deep understanding gained during the innumerable hours they have spent with these women and men in their clinical practices. The result is a valuable resource for these too often forgotten adult children, many of whom find that, whenever they express their feelings and experiences, the most important people in their lives frequently ignore and dismiss them. As the divorce rate for older adults soars, so too does the number of adult children who are experiencing parental divorce. Yet, these adult children frequently say that they are the only ones who are aware of what they are going through, no one understands what they are experiencing, and they feel painfully alone.

Download or read book Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children written by Allison Bottke and published by Harvest House Publishers. This book was released on 2019-12-03 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This important and compassionate new book from the creator of the successful God Allows U-Turns series will help parents and grandparents of the many adult children who continue to make life painful for their loved ones. Writing from firsthand experience, Allison identifies the lies that kept her, and ultimately her son in bondage—and how she overcame them. Additional real life stories from other parents are woven through the text. A tough–love book to help readers cope with dysfunctional adult children, Setting Boundaries® with Your Adult Children will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y.—a six–step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives. S = STOP Enabling, STOP Blaming Yourself, and STOP the Flow of Money A = Assemble a Support Group N = Nip Excuses in the Bud I = Implement Rules/Boundaries T = Trust Your Instincts Y = Yield Everything to God Foreword by Carol Kent (When I Lay My Isaac Down)