Download or read book Mountain Man Dance Moves written by McSweeney's and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2006-09-12 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If a mountain man felt compelled to dance, how would he do it? If koala bears could talk, what would they say? And what’s the right pickup line, if you’re a necrophiliac? (Maybe “I’m pretty sure I’m not going to get you pregnant.”) In the throes of debates like these, we’re lucky to have the learned people of McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, America's best low-budget humor website, and their edifying work. From their best-looking writers comes this collection of over three hundred lists, including... “Signs Your Unicorn Is Cheating on You.”"Errors in Communication Between My Hairdresser and Me, in the Form of What I Said and What He Heard""Things This City Was Built On, Besides Rock 'n' Roll""Things This One Girl Sitting Near Me in a Movie Theater Said Out Loud When One of the Characters Was Shown Pulling Into a Gas Station""Future Winners of the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest""Adjectives Rarely Used by Wine Tasters""The Collected Apologies of Lawrence H. Summers, President of Harvard""Exactly What I Mean When I Say My Ex-Girlfriend Kristin and I 'Wanted Different Things from Life’"And much, much more...
Download or read book Dancing on My Ashes written by Heather Gilion and published by Tate Publishing. This book was released on 2010-05 with total page 312 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Holly and Heather share their story and help to walk the reader through the painful yet necessary healing process for when life deals us its harshest blows. Dancing on my ashes soothes and empathizes with the broken heart, while sharing the truth of scripture, and the hope that comes from the heart of God.
Download or read book Battle of the Mountain Man written by William W. Johnstone and published by Pinnacle Books. This book was released on 2017-08-29 with total page 222 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: USA Today bestselling author: A Colorado cattleman wages all-out war on a gang of ruthless rustlers . . . The kind of man for whom God created the gun, Smoke Jensen stands as a force of will in the brutal, lawless west . . . Nothing will stand in his way Smoke Jensen has a good woman by his side. Now all he needs to make Sugarloaf the best cattle ranch in Colorado is John Chisum's prime steer. But a cattle war has turned the landscape into a battleground, and a ruthless gang of rustlers is hot on Smoke's trail. The bullet-proof mountain man is determined to get what he wants—even if he has to blast every one of the dirty desperados back to hell.
Download or read book Howl written by Bark Editors and published by Crown. This book was released on 2008-10-07 with total page 354 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A pot roast left unguarded. An open bedroom door. An ill-timed squat. Dogs seem to have impeccable timing. Yet how quickly calamity turns to comedy in the company of a dog, and the wrong moment turns out to be just the right one. In this delightful follow-up to Dog Is My Co-Pilot, which won the Best Book of the Year award from the Dog Writers Association of America, the editors of The Bark bring together more stories, essays, and artwork that highlight the hilarity of dog behavior and the comical interactions between dog people and their four-legged friends. From playful puppies who wreak havoc in the home to dogs with a whole array of comic shticks and tricks, Howl celebrates the verve and the laughs pets offer their people. It includes laugh-out-loud reflections (and confessions), rib-tickling tales, and whimsical vignettes from well-known writers such as: • Dave Barry • Margaret Cho • Al Franken • Kinky Friedman • Pam Houston • Haven Kimmel • Neal Pollack • And many more!
Download or read book Under Purple Skies written by Frank Bures and published by Arcadia Publishing. This book was released on 2019-05-07 with total page 190 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In recent years, Minneapolis has become one of America’s literary powerhouses. With over fifty poems and essays, Under Purple Skies: The Minneapolis Anthology collects some of the most exciting work being done in, or about, Minneapolis and the Twin Cities area, with narrative threads that stretch back not just to Scandinavia, but across the world. Edited by Frank Bures (The Geography of Madness), the writers included here have won, or been shortlisted for, the Newbery Award, the Man Booker Prize, the Pulitzer, the Caldecott Award, the National Book Award, the Minnesota Book Award, and many others.
Download or read book Trail of the Mountain Man revenge of the Mountain Man written by William W. Johnstone and published by Pinnacle Books. This book was released on 2010-04-19 with total page 544 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The Mountain Man defends his home against lawless killers in these two Western adventures by the New York Times–bestselling author. Trail of the Mountain Man When gold is discovered near the little town of No-Name, Colorado, the citizens are overjoyed. But soon, every gunslick from the Atlantic to the Rockies is beating a path to the gold strike—which happens to be right on Smoke Jensen’s doorstep. Outnumbered a hundred to one, Jensen recruits a small army of the frontier’s ageing but still lethal legends. As these men ride into the violent sunset of their grizzled lives, one thing is certain: There's going to be a lot of blood spilled before anyone walks away with the gold. Revenge of the Mountain Man Smoke Jensen is buying cattle a hundred miles away from his Colorado ranch when he gets devastating news. Drawing two horses from the remuda, he rides off and doesn’t stop until he reaches his wife’s side. She’d been shot three times and lay close to death. Smoke Jensen knows the outlaws who committed this cowardly crime had come for him. And now he’s coming for them . . .
Download or read book CollegeHumor The Website The Book written by Writers of College Humor and published by Da Capo Press. This book was released on 2011-08-23 with total page 280 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The first (and maybe last, depending on sales) anthology of the hugely popular website CollegeHumor.com! Since 1999, CollegeHumor.com has been home to some of the best comedy online. From its humble, dorm room origins, CollegeHumor has grown to attract over ten million monthly visitors, making it far more popular than any magazine except the one published by the AARP (different demographic). It employs dozens of young comedy writers and performers who, having grown tired of competing with online pornography, have agreed to commit their work to paper in this book. CollegeHumor. The Website. The Book. compiles the staff's favorite articles from the first decade of the site's existence, plunging the depths of the archive to bring you the very best of the very funny, including such favorites as: Drunk-O-Vision Great Historical Pickup Lines Honest Cyber Sex Where I Hide My Porn The Riddler Gets Lazy Instant Messaging with Mom Introducing Google Smartass And hundreds more that don’t have catchy enough titles for the back cover!
Download or read book Here I Am the Abraham Legacy written by Betty Pack and published by Author House. This book was released on 2013-08-08 with total page 518 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In 1990, when Saddam Husseins military force invades Kuwait, millions of Americans hear the call to surrender loved ones to bloody combat and almost certain death in the Arabian desert. In Saverne, a Texas town near the U.S. border with Mexico, social worker Grace Faith Hernandez has a son in the Infantry and a fianc working in Kuwait, now MIAperhaps taken captive to Baghdador dead. Homeless former head librarian Katie Hand has a son/grandson, one of the first Air Force E-15 pilots to arrive in Oman. Rancher Red, Hubba-Hubba Clay, has a son, somewhat estranged from him, a career Marine already in Al Jubal with the California desert-trained 7th MEB. Together they wait for war.
Download or read book City of Weird written by Gigi Little and published by Forest Avenue Press. This book was released on 2016-10-11 with total page 350 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: City of Weird conjures what we fear: death, darkness, ghosts. Hungry sea monsters and alien slime molds. Blood drinkers and game show hosts. Set in Portland, Oregon, these thirty stories blend imagination, literary writing, and pop culture into a cohesive weirdness that honors the city’s personality, its bookstores and bridges and solo volcano, as well as the tradition of sci-fi pulp magazines. Including such authors as Rene Denfeld, Justin Hocking, Leni Zumas, and Kevin Sampsell, editor Gigi Little has curated a collection that is quirky, chilling, often profound—and always perfectly weird.
Download or read book The McSweeney s Joke Book of Book Jokes written by McSweeney's and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2008-04-01 with total page 226 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A hilarious collection of the best book-related humor from the humor-laden archives of McSweeney's Internet Tendency. As John Hodgman says in this book's introduction, “We all know that books are funny. First, they are made of paste and cloth, which is funny, as is the fact that people still buy and read them.” Open McSweeney's Joke Book of Book Jokes and be regaled by such sketches, lists, letters, and spoofs as: Postcards from James Joyce to his Brother Stan Winnie-the-Pooh is My Coworker Ikea Product or Lord of the Rings Character? Popular Children's Fairy Tales Reimagined Using Members of My Family The Very Unauthorized Biography of Steven Seagal Chuck Norris Erotica John Updike, Television Writer Jane Eyre Runs for President Cormac McCarthy Writes to the Editor of the Santa Fe New Mexican Holden Caulfield Gives the Commencement Speech to a High School Letters from Odysseus's College Roommate And many dozens more.
Download or read book The McSweeney s Book of Politics and Musicals written by McSweeney's and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2012-06-26 with total page 370 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Ever since John Hancock broke into song after signing the Declaration of Independence, American politics and musicals have been inextricably linked. From Alexander Hamilton's jazz hands, to Chester A. Arthur's oboe operas, to Newt Gingrich's off-Broadway sexscapade, You, Me, and My Moon Colony Mistress Makes Three, government and musical theater have joined forces to document our nation's long history of freedom, partisanship, and dancers on roller skates pretending to be choo choo trains. To celebrate this grand union of entrenched bureaucracy and song, the patriots at McSweeney's Internet Tendency (“The Iowa Caucus of humor websites”) offer this riotous collection (peacefully assembled!) of monologues, charts, scripts, lists, diatribes, AND musicals written by the noted fake-musical lyricist, Ben Greenman. On the agenda are . . . Fragments from PALIN! THE MUSICAL Barack Obama’s Undersold 2012 Campaign Slogans Atlas Shrugged Updated for the Financial Crisis Your Attempts to Legislate Hunting Man for Sport Reek of Class Warfare A 1980s Teen Sex Comedy Becomes Politically Uncomfortable Donald Rumsfeld Memoir Chapter Title Or German Heavy Metal Song? Noises Political Pundits Would Make If They Were Wild Animals and Not Political Pundits Ron Paul Gives a Guided Tour of His Navajo Art Collection Classic Nursery Rhymes, Updated and Revamped for the Recession, As Told to Me By My Father And much more!
Download or read book Possessed By The Mountain Man written by Abby Jensen and published by Abby Jensen. This book was released on 2023-10-09 with total page 47 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A grumpy, rich, mountain man who has closed his heart to love and family meets a bossy school teacher who is determined to teach him a lesson in how to love and live a happier life. Emma is a little lost. Her younger sister is married, having a baby and has the house of Emma’s dreams. Taking a break from life Emma decides one night with a Mountain Man might be just what she needs. Hunter Wilde left home and never looked back. He has made his millions, built up businesses and decided there is no room for family in his schedule. A quick trip back just for the birth of his brother’s baby and then he is out of there. That is until he meets a prim and proper, hot, school teacher who might hold the key to melting his ice-cold heart. A short, sweet and sexy romance. Full story with a happily ever after. This is Book 3 of the Wilde Brothers but can be read as a stand alone story.
Download or read book BUILT The Mountain Man s Babies A Secret Baby Second Chance Romance written by Frankie Love and published by Frankie Love. This book was released on with total page 136 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: I pull into the diner of this small mountain town, knowing there’s only two things I want: To put down roots and find someone to build a life with. And when I slide into the booth, the woman who pours me a cup of joe is sweet as sugar and warm as apple pie. She serves me up a “Josie Special” and I know she’s made to order—the only woman for me. My past is dark, too dark for a ray of light like her. But she cracks open the clouds and lets the sunshine in … she sees me as the man I can become. Her father wants me gone. He thinks he knows all about me. But he’s wrong, and I’ll do whatever I can to clear my name. For Josie. For our love. For the life we will build together. Dear Reader, You’re going to melt when you meet Beau Montgomery—he’s BUILT, if you know what I mean. He’s all man, all alpha—and all yours. This mountain is full of babies, and he’s gonna make one fine baby-daddy—guaranteed! xo, frankie
Download or read book Tennessee Waltz The Homespun Hearts Series Book 1 written by Trana Mae Simmons and published by ePublishing Works!. This book was released on 2014-04-25 with total page 262 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Sarah Channing's fiancé hardens his heart toward a needy child named Mairi, the New York Socialite puts her wedding on hold to locate the child's only relatives, hidden deep in the Appalachians. Arriving at Sawback Mountain, Sarah meets Wyn, Mairi's handsome older cousin, and finds herself wishing for something she doesn't have: a glimmer of beauty. Wyn had his fill of beautiful city-bred women during his time in Washington, DC, as a senator's aide. Yet he's impressed by Sarah, working hard to gain the love and respect of the mountain folks. But Sarah is making mistake after mistake as she tries to use her money and influence to improve the lives of the children. Perhaps the proud mountain folk are right: a cultured socialite, even one without beauty, has no place on their mountain or in the heart of a mountain man who's vowed to never again leave the life he loves. REVIEWS: "The mountain community... comes alive under Trana Mae Simmons' artful pen. Her romance charms." ~Gerry Benninger, Romantic Times "...a refreshing, fun-to-read American historical romance. This reviewer will gladly waltz to more tales by Ms. Simmons." ~Harriet Klausner THE HOMESPUN HEARTS SERIES, in order Tennessee Waltz Town Social Winter Dreams
Download or read book Nate Grisham Black Mountain Man written by W.R. Benton and published by Loose Cannon. This book was released on 2013-11-11 with total page 373 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the Author of Red Runs the Plain & War Paint After a storm tossed night in the Rockies, Nate Grisham encounters a lost Army captain and his family far from any civilized town. And something doesn't seem right about his story of having been ambushed by Blackfoot warriors. After escorting them to the nearest Army post he discovers the Army is looking for an imposter—and murderer. W.R. Benton and newcomer Grady Clark team up to bring another rip-roaring mountain man western to life in this new book. This story is inspired by real historical examples of blacks, both freed men and runaways, that moved west before and after the Civil war. Keywords: Sioux,Old west,hawken,crow,trapper,outlaw,bowie,murderer,series
Download or read book Cunning of the Mountain Man written by William W. Johnstone and published by Pinnacle Books. This book was released on 2001-10-01 with total page 324 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Smoke Jensen is determined to find a way out of a New Mexico jail cell--as well as to escape the hide-hungry lynch mob who's after him for a murder he didn't commit. Then he must win the trust of the beautiful widow of the rancher they say he gunned down, because Smoke is all she's got standing between her and the cunning killers out for land--and blood.
Download or read book Mountain Man written by Vardis Fisher and published by Amereon Limited. This book was released on 1980 with total page 340 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Tailored after the actual Crow Killer John Johnson, Sam Minard is a mountain man who seeks the freedom that the Rocky Mountains offers trappers. After his beloved Indian wife is murdered, Sam Minard becomes obsessed with vengeance, and his fortunes become intertwined with those of Kate Bowden, a widow who faces madness. This remarkable frontier fiction captures that brief season when the romantic myth of the far West became a fact.
