Download or read book Monsters Eat Whiny Children written by Bruce Eric Kaplan and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-08-23 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dad has warned Henry and Eve: If you whine too much, monsters will eat you. Henry and Eve don’t listen, of course. The only problem is, when the monster comes, he can’t find the right recipe for whiny children—and neither can his monster friends! A whiny child salad doesn’t work because there’s paprika in the dressing. A whiny child cake won’t do because the flour spills all over the floor. And whiny child burgers are out of the question because the grill is too hard to light up. Arguments and hilarity ensue. And just when our persnickety monsters decide on the perfect dish…the worst thing of all happens….
Download or read book Cousin Irv from Mars written by Bruce Eric Kaplan and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-06-04 with total page 40 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the author/illustrator of Monsters Eat Whiny Children comes a humorous tale about learning to accept your family—even if one of them is an alien. Teddy isn’t excited about Cousin Irv’s visit. Cousin Irv is too weird. He steals Teddy’s pillow, eats Teddy’s food, and even plays with Teddy’s action figures. Not to mention that Cousin Irv is from MARS. What will Teddy’s friends say? But it turns out that everyone at school loves Cousin Irv. Not only is he from a different planet, he can vaporize things! Maybe cousins from Mars aren’t so bad after all... Illustrated with clever simplicity in New Yorker cartoonist Bruce Kaplan’s trademark style and filled with out-of-this-world whimsy, Cousin Irv from Mars is an interplanetary treat that begs to be shared.
Download or read book I Would Really Like to Eat a Child written by Sylviane Donnio and published by Random House Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2007 with total page 31 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: One morning Achilles, a young crocodile, insists that he will eat a child that day and refuses all other food, but when he actually finds a little girl, she puts him in his place.
Download or read book You Have to Read This Book written by Bruce Eric Kaplan and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2021-03-30 with total page 40 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Morris buys a book for his son, Benny, that he enjoyed as a child, but Benny stubbornly refuses to read or even listen to it--forcing Morris to ridiculous extremes, such as a safari to the middle of the Sahara.
Download or read book Go the F k to Sleep written by Adam Mansbach and published by Akashic Books. This book was released on 2011-06-14 with total page 18 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The #1 New York Times Bestseller: “A hilarious take on that age-old problem: getting the beloved child to go to sleep” (NPR). “Hell no, you can’t go to the bathroom. You know where you can go? The f**k to sleep.” Go the Fuck to Sleep is a book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland. Profane, affectionate, and radically honest, it captures the familiar—and unspoken—tribulations of putting your little angel down for the night. Read by a host of celebrities, from Samuel L. Jackson to Jennifer Garner, this subversively funny bestselling storybook will not actually put your kids to sleep, but it will leave you laughing so hard you won’t care.
Download or read book Author written by Helen Lester and published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. This book was released on 2002-08-26 with total page 37 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: So begins the story of Helen Lester, author of Tacky the Penguin and many other popular books for children. By sharing her struggles as a child and later as a successful author, she demonstrates that hurdles are part of the process. She even gives writing tips, such as keeping a "fizzle box." Helen Lester uses her unique ability to laugh at her mistakes to create both a guide for young writers and an amusing personal story of the disappointments and triumphs of a writer's life.
Download or read book Pig n of Howth written by Kathleen Watkins and published by Gill & Company. This book was released on 2016 with total page 64 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Pigín, a very popular pig in the seaside town of Howth on Dublin Bay, joins his friends, Sammy Seal, Sally Seagull, the badger of Ballsbridge, and the fairies of Howth Castle on a series of adventures.
Download or read book Meaniehead written by Bruce Eric Kaplan and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-06-10 with total page 40 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Henry and Eve are going through a phase of fighting with each other all the time, and their battle quickly escalates from arguing over a toy to leaving a path of destruction across the United States and beyond.
Download or read book Someone Farted written by Bruce Eric Kaplan and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2018-04-17 with total page 46 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Two words throw a family’s car trip into utter (and smelly) chaos in this hilarious story of denial from Bruce Eric Kaplan. The Krupkes are having a nice, peaceful Saturday morning drive to the grocery store when: it happens. Someone. Farts. The car is thrown into chaos. Sister turns against brother. Mom almost faints. Dad almost gets into an accident. The smell is so bad it’s criminal—so criminal they all end up in jail! And still no one will take responsibility for the odious odor. Will the Krupkes make it through this ordeal in one piece, or will they fracture from the unending accusations of “whoever smelt it dealt it?”
Download or read book Pirate s Log written by Jory John and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2008-07-07 with total page 176 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hoist the anchor and get ready for high seas adventure! This arrr-inspiring journal provides aspiring pirates games, puzzles, challenges, and advice on everything from swabbing the deck to walking the plank and avoiding scurvy. And for studying treasure maps after the lights go out, this journal also includes a reading light for secret journaling below deck!
Download or read book Miss Peregrine s Peculiar Children Boxed Set written by Ransom Riggs and published by Quirk Books. This book was released on 2015-10-20 with total page 1152 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The New York Times #1 best-selling series. Includes 3 novels by Ransom Riggs and 12 peculiar photographs. Together for the first time, here is the #1 New York Times best seller Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children and its two sequels, Hollow City and Library of Souls. All three hardcovers are packaged in a beautifully designed slipcase. Also included: a special collector's envelope of twelve peculiar photographs, highlighting the most memorable moments of this extraordinary three-volume fantasy. MISS PEREGRINE'S HOME FOR PECULIAR CHILDREN: A mysterious island. An abandoned orphanage. A strange collection of very curious photographs. It all waits to be discovered in this groundbreaking novel, which mixes fiction and photography in a thrilling new kind of reading experience. As our story opens, a horrific family tragedy sets sixteen-year-old Jacob Portman journeying to a remote island off the coast of Wales, where he discovers the crumbling ruins of Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children. HOLLOW CITY: September 3, 1940. Ten peculiar children flee an army of deadly monsters. And only one person can help them—but she's trapped in the body of a bird. The extraordinary adventure continues as Jacob Portman and his newfound friends journey to London, the peculiar capital of the world. There, they hope to find a cure for their beloved headmistress, Miss Peregrine. But in this war-torn city, hideous surprises lurk around every corner. LIBRARY OF SOULS: A boy, a girl, and a talking dog. They're all that stands between the sinister wights and the future of peculiar children everywhere. Jacob Portman ventures through history one last time to rescue the peculiar children from a heavily guarded fortress. He's joined by girlfriend and firestarter Emma Bloom, canine companion Addison MacHenry, and some very unexpected allies.
Download or read book The Latke Who Couldn t Stop Screaming A Christmas Story written by Lemony Snicket and published by . This book was released on 2023-11-07 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Dragons Eat Noodles on Tuesdays written by Jon Stahl and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2019-03-26 with total page 48 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A playful, interactive, and laugh-out-loud-funny picture book with a deliciously hilarious ending! "Once upon a time," begins the big blue monster who is trying to tell a fabulous story. "It needs to be about a kid who is eaten by a dragon," he insists.But his little monster friend is not convinced that this is a good idea. "Dragon stories usually don't end well," he warns.As the two monsters argue over how the story should go, a hungry dragon named Dennis is listening nearby. Dennis knows exactly how this story should go... And by the way, what day is it?Watch out!
Download or read book The Day the Crayons Quit written by Drew Daywalt and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2013-06-27 with total page 41 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The hilarious, colorful #1 New York Times bestselling phenomenon that every kid wants! Gift a copy to someone you love today. Poor Duncan just wants to color. But when he opens his box of crayons, he finds only letters, all saying the same thing: His crayons have had enough! They quit! Blue crayon needs a break from coloring all those bodies of water. Black crayon wants to be used for more than just outlining. And Orange and Yellow are no longer speaking—each believes he is the true color of the sun. What can Duncan possibly do to appease all of the crayons and get them back to doing what they do best? With giggle-inducing text from Drew Daywalt and bold and bright illustrations from Oliver Jeffers, The Day the Crayons Quit is the perfect gift for new parents, baby showers, back-to-school, or any time of year! Perfect for fans of Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus by Mo Willems and The True Story of the Three Little Pigs by Jon Sciezka and Lane Smith. Praise for The Day the Crayons Quit: Amazon’s 2013 Best Picture Book of the Year A Barnes & Noble Best Book of 2013 Goodreads’ 2013 Best Picture Book of the Year Winner of the E.B. White Read-Aloud Award * “Hilarious . . . Move over, Click, Clack, Moo; we’ve got a new contender for the most successful picture-book strike.” –BCCB, starred review “Jeffers . . . elevates crayon drawing to remarkable heights.” –Booklist “Fresh and funny.” –The Wall Street Journal "This book will have children asking to have it read again and again.” –Library Media Connection * “This colorful title should make for an uproarious storytime.” –School Library Journal, starred review * “These memorable personalities will leave readers glancing apprehensively at their own crayon boxes.” –Publishers Weekly, starred review “Utterly original.” –San Francisco Chronicle
Download or read book That s Not Your Mommy Anymore written by Matt Mogk and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-05-10 with total page 34 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A twisted children’s book parody that teaches kids what to do if mommy suddenly joins the legion of the undead. In the ongoing effort to warn an unprepared world of the rising danger from zombie attacks, one vulnerable group has been left out—small children. That's Not Your Mommy Anymore offers social workers, counselors, and educators a helpful new tool to communicate with hard-to-reach at-risk youth. This inviting and entertaining story helps early readers understand for themselves that a mom who has fresh brain casserole in the oven instead of her usual meatloaf is probably not their mommy anymore . . . This utterly twisted and incredibly funny take on the classic children’s book genre tells an entertaining story in rhyming text even as it teaches other telltale signs that mom has been bitten by a zombie! Rabid zombie fans will be highly entertained by this hilarious parody that adult readers are sure to love as much as the real children books they enjoyed as kids. Praise for That’s Not Your Mommy Anymore “Younger kids might be a little frightened by the idea of a formerly loving mother who now wants to dine on human flesh, but older kids and grown ups will get a kick out of this tale.” —GeekDad, Wired.com
Download or read book Game of Stars Kiranmala and the Kingdom Beyond 2 written by Sayantani DasGupta and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2019-02-26 with total page 263 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Saving the multiverse is no game in this New York Times bestseller! When the Demon Queen shows up in her bedroom, smelling of acid and surrounded by evil-looking bees, twelve-year-old Kiranmala is uninterested. After all, it's been weeks since she last heard from her friends in the Kingdom Beyond, the alternate dimension where she was born as an Indian princess. But after a call to action over an interdimensional television station and a visit with some all-seeing birds, Kiran decides that she has to once again return to her homeland, where society is fraying, a terrible game show reigns supreme, and friends and foes alike are in danger. Everyone is running scared or imprisoned following the enactment of sudden and unfair rules of law.However, things are a lot less clear than the last time she was in the Kingdom Beyond. Kiran must once again solve riddles and battle her evil Serpent King father -- all while figuring out who her true friends are, and what it really means to be a hero.
Download or read book Indestructibles Baby Faces written by Amy Pixton and published by Workman Publishing. This book was released on 2012-05-22 with total page 12 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Indestructibles are the books built for the way babies read. They are 100 percent baby-proof, chew-proof, rip-proof, and drool-proof. Printed on a unique nontoxic, paperlike material that holds up to anything babies can throw at it—gumming, spilling, dragging across the floor— Indestructibles are the little books that could. They’re indestructible. And if they get dirty, just throw them in the washing machine or dishwasher. Baby Faces features baby’s favorite thing: pictures of other babies. It’s a book for parents and children to share together the many moods of a baby.
