Download or read book Glovebox Joke Circus written by Dave Lambert and published by Infinity Pub. This book was released on 2007-07-01 with total page 90 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An all-purpose smorgasbord of nonsense. Ice-breakers for public speakers. New ammo for partiers. Open the glovebox for humor when taking kids on trips, long or short. Inexpensive gift for birthdays and any occasion.Samples: .Why are ghosts so smart? .They always have a clear head. .When is it bad news for things to be all right? .When you?re left-handed. .Why would a stonemason make a good politician? .He already knows how to stonewall. .I could have been a cabinetmaker but I was afraid to cut corners. .?A car with a joke book is a happy car.??Dave Lambert

Download or read book Rats Saw God written by Rob Thomas and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2012-06-12 with total page 218 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Steve details his descent from bright star to burnout in this newly repackaged edition of the definitive, highly acclaimed novel from the creator of Veronica Mars and Party Down. Houston, sophomore year: Steve is on top of the world. He and his friends are the talk of the school. He’s in love with a terrific girl. He can even deal with “the astronaut”—a world-famous hero who happens to be his father. San Diego, senior year: Steve is bummed out, drugged out, flunking out. A no-nonsense counselor says he can graduate if he writes a 100-page paper. So Steve starts writing, and as the paper becomes more and more personal, he reveals how a National Merit Scholar has become an under-achieving stoner. And in telling how he got to where he is, Steve discovers how to get to where he wants to be.

Download or read book To Fetch A Thief written by Spencer Quinn and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2011-09-29 with total page 331 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Chet has smelled a lot of unusual things in his years as trusted companion and partner to P.I. Bernie Little, but nothing has prepared him for the exotic scents he encounters when an old-fashioned traveling circus comes to town. Bernie scores tickets to this less-than-greatest-show-on-earth because his son Charlie is crazy about elephants. The only problem is that Peanut, the headlining pachyderm of this partiuclar one-ring circus, has gone missing--along with her trainer, Uri DeLeath. Stranger still, no one saw them leave. How does an elephant vanish without a trace into the dark desert night? Some very dangerous people would prefer that Chet and Bernie disappear for good and will go to any lengths to make that happen. Across the border in Mexcio and separated from Bernie, Chet must use all his natural strength and doggy smarts to try and save himself--not to mention Bernie and a decidedly uncooperative Peanut, too.

Download or read book The Ministry of SUITs written by Paul Gamble and published by Feiwel & Friends. This book was released on 2016-07-26 with total page 385 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Memo: For Ministry of Strange, Unusual, and Impossible Things Operatives Only RE: The Ministry of SUITs by Paul Gamble (winner of the Eilís Dillon award for a first children’s book) A series of strange incidents have been reported in Belfast: * Oddball kids are going missing * There are several unconfirmed signs of pirates. * A wild bear known to be a very sore loser at musical statues has escaped from the museum and is on the rampage. Fortunately, our newest recruits, Jack Pearse, a curious boy skilled at logical thinking and seeing what's actually there, and Trudy Emerson, the most dangerous girl in his school, are on the case. As per Ministry policy, they are currently being trained in the use of The Speed (patent pending) and will have full access to Ministry supplies (assuming they manage to navigate the paperwork without going insane), so we are confident that they will succeed in their mission to discover and foil this villainous plot. Please provide all assistance possible, as a) they don't know who they are actually up against, b) the world is much stranger than they realized, and c) they are only 12 and have to be in bed by 10 p.m. P.S.-Could all Ministry operatives who have borrowed dinosaurs in the past two weeks please return them? We're running low on inventory.

Download or read book Dreaming in Black and White written by Laura Jensen Walker and published by HarperChristian + ORM. This book was released on 2005-03-27 with total page 295 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: She's smart. She's savvy. She's...well, she's working on the thighs. And with God as her witness, she'll never let that man spoil her happy ending! Phoebe Grant is everyone's favorite movie geek-unbeatable at trivia, convinced that all the world's a movie screen. She can organize a four-hankie chick-flickathon with a wave of her tall, nonfat, double mocha. And she's a shoo-in for the job of her dreams-movie reviewer for the newpaper where she works. Enter Alex Spencer-not only gorgeous but also a film buff, perfectly cast for a celluloid kiss and a fade to sunset. Unfortunately, Alex is the villain who sends Phoebe packing to the last place on earth she wants to be-back home to boring little Barley, California. But wait. It couldn't be. Dark, handsome, and annoying Alex...in Barley? Can Phoebe protect her hometown-and her heart-and prove It's a Wonderful Life? Or is her promising future truly Gone with the Wind?

Download or read book A Week of Mondays written by Jessica Brody and published by Farrar, Straus and Giroux (BYR). This book was released on 2016-08-02 with total page 465 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When I made the wish, I just wanted a do-over. Another chance to make things right. I never, in a million years, thought it might actually come true... Sixteen-year-old Ellison Sparks is having a serious case of the Mondays. She gets a ticket for running a red light, she manages to take the world’s worst school picture, she bombs softball try-outs and her class election speech (note to self: never trust a cheerleader when she swears there are no nuts in her bake-sale banana bread), and to top it all off, Tristan, her gorgeous rocker boyfriend suddenly dumps her. For no good reason! As far as Mondays go, it doesn’t get much worse than this. And Ellie is positive that if she could just do it all over again, she would get it right. So when she wakes up the next morning to find she’s reliving the exact same day, she knows what she has to do: stop her boyfriend from breaking up with her. But it seems no matter how many do-overs she gets or how hard Ellie tries to repair her relationship, Tristan always seems bent set on ending it. Will Ellie ever figure out how to fix this broken day? Or will she be stuck in this nightmare of a Monday forever? From the author of 52 Reasons to Hate My Father and The Unremembered trilogy comes a hilarious and heartwarming story about second (and third and fourth and fifth) chances. Because sometimes it takes a whole week of Mondays to figure out what you really want.

Download or read book Main Street written by Sinclair Lewis and published by BoD - Books on Demand. This book was released on 2023-06-01 with total page 622 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Carol Milford grows up in a mid-sized town in Minnesota before moving to Chicago for college. After her education, during which she’s exposed to big-city life and culture, she moves to Minneapolis to work as a librarian. She soon meets Will Kennicott, a small-town doctor, and the two get married and move to Gopher Prairie, Kennicott’s home town. Carol, inspired by big-city ideas, soon begins chafing at the seeming quaintness and even backwardness of the townsfolk, and their conservative, self-satisfied way of life. She struggles to try to reform the town in her image, while finding meaning in the seeming cultural desert she’s found herself in and in her increasingly cold marriage. Gopher Prairie is a detailed, satirical take on small-town American life, modeled after Sauk Centre, the town in which Lewis himself grew up. The town is fully realized, with generations of inhabitants interacting in a complex web of village society. Its bitingly satirical portrayal made Main Street highly acclaimed by its contemporaries, though many thought the satirical take was perhaps a bit too dark and hopeless. The book’s celebration and condemnation of small town life make it a candidate for the title of the Great American Novel. Main Street was awarded the 1921 Pulitzer Prize, but the decision was overturned by the prize’s Board of Trustees and awarded instead to Edith Wharton for The Age of Innocence. When Lewis went on to win the 1926 Pulitzer for Arrowsmith, he declined it—with the New York Times reporting that he did so because he was still angry at the Pulitzers for being denied the prize for Main Street. Despite the book’s snub at the Pulitzers, Lewis went on to win the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1930, with Main Street being cited as one of the reasons for his win.

Download or read book I Am Malala written by Malala Yousafzai and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2014-08-19 with total page 246 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Written in collaboration with critically acclaimed NATIONAL BOOK AWARD finalist Patricia McCormick, Malala tells her story - from her childhood in the Swat Valley to the shooting, her recovery and new life in England. She's a girl who loves cricket, gossips with her best friends, and, on the day of the shooting, nearly overslept and missed an exam. A girl who saw women suddenly banned from public, schools blown up, the Taliban seize control, and her homeland descend into a state of fear and repression. This is the story of her life, and also of her passionate belief in every child's right to education, her determination to make that a reality throughout the world, and her hope to inspire others.

Download or read book Move Under Ground written by Nick Mamatas and published by Courier Dover Publications. This book was released on 2020-06-17 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Readers will be enthralled, chilled, and astonished." -- Tom Piccirilli, author of A Choir of Ill Children. In the first of many references to H. P. Lovecraft's "The Call of Cthulhu," this thoroughly unique novel begins with the rise of the lost city of R'lyeh, portending certain doom for human existence. The witness to this deadly harbinger is Jack Kerouac, who recruits fellow beats Neal Cassady and William S. Burroughs for a cross-country road trip that will climax in a confrontation with a murderous cult.

Download or read book Weather Woman written by Cai Emmons and published by Red Hen Press. This book was released on 2018-10-09 with total page 425 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A woman discovers a hidden power, and travels the world trying to learn how to use it, in “a deeply fascinating and extremely timely novel” (Margot Livesey, New York Times–bestselling author of The Boy in the Field). Thirty-year-old Bronwyn Artair feels out of place in her doctoral program in Atmospheric Sciences at MIT. So she drops out and takes a job as a TV meteorologist, much to the dismay of her mentor. After a year of living alone in New Hampshire, enduring the indignities of her job, dumped by her boyfriend, she discovers that her deep connection to the natural world has given her an ability to affect natural forces. When she finally accepts she really possesses this startling capability, she must then negotiate a new relationship to the world. Who will she tell? Who will believe her? Most importantly, how will she put this new skill of hers to use? As she seeks answers, she travels to Kansas to see the tornado maverick she worships; falls in love with the tabloid journalist who has come to investigate her; visits fires raging out of control in Los Angeles; and eventually voyages to the methane fields of Siberia. A woman experiencing power for the first time in her life, she must figure out what she can do for the world without hurting it further, in a novel about science, intuition, and what the earth needs from humans. “Full of amazing science, and even more amazing characters, it's the kind of book you want to press into the hands of everyone you meet because you need them to read it so you all can obsess and talk about it.” —Caroline Leavitt, New York Times–bestselling author of With or Without You

Download or read book Miss Wyoming written by Douglas Coupland and published by Vintage. This book was released on 2001-04-25 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the bestselling author of Generation X and Microserfs, comes the absurd and tender story of a hard-living movie producer and a former child beauty pageant contender who only find each other by losing themselves. Waking up in an L.A. hospital, John Johnson is amazed that it was the flu and not an overdose of five different drugs mixed with cognac that nearly killed him. As a producer of high-adrenaline action flicks, he's led a decadent and dangerous life, purchasing his way through every conceivable variant of sex. But each variation seems to take him one notch away from a capacity for love, and while movie-making was once a way for him to create worlds of sensation, it now bores him. After his near-death experience, John decides to walk away from his life. Susan Colgate is an unbankable former tv star and child beauty pageant contender. Forced to marry a heavy metal singer in need of a Green Card after her parents squander her sitcom earnings, she becomes the alpha road rat. But when the band's popularity dwindles, the marriage dissolves. Flying back to Los Angeles in Economy, Susan's plane crashes and only she survives. As she walks away from the disaster virtually unscathed, Susan, too, decides to disappear. John and Susan are two souls searching for love across the bizarre, celebrity-obsessed landscape of LA, and are driven, almost fatefully, toward each other. Hilarious, fast-paced and ultimately heart-wrenching, Miss Wyoming is about people who, after throwing off their self-made identities, begin the fearful search for a love that exposes all vulnerabilities.

Download or read book Volt written by Alan Heathcock and published by Graywolf Press. This book was released on 2011-03-01 with total page 208 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A blistering collection of stories from an exhilarating new voice One man kills another after neither will move his pickup truck from the road. A female sheriff in a flooded town attempts to cover up a murder. When a farmer harvesting a field accidentally runs over his son, his grief sets him off walking, mile after mile. A band of teens bent on destruction runs amok in a deserted town at night. As these men and women lash out at the inscrutable churn of the world around them, they find a grim measure of peace in their solitude. Throughout Volt, Alan Heathcock's stark realism is leavened by a lyric energy that matches the brutality of the surface. And as you move through the wind-lashed landscape of these stories, faint signs of hope appear underfoot. In Volt, the work of a writer who's hell-bent on wrenching out whatever beauty this savage world has to offer, Heathcock's tales of lives set afire light up the sky like signal flares touched off in a moment of desperation.

Download or read book Baled Hay written by Bill Nye and published by . This book was released on 1893 with total page 316 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book With a Little Help written by Cory Doctorow and published by . This book was released on 2015 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book I Am Malala written by Malala Yousafzai and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2013-10-08 with total page 366 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A MEMOIR BY THE YOUNGEST RECIPIENT OF THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE As seen on Netflix with David Letterman "I come from a country that was created at midnight. When I almost died it was just after midday." When the Taliban took control of the Swat Valley in Pakistan, one girl spoke out. Malala Yousafzai refused to be silenced and fought for her right to an education. On Tuesday, October 9, 2012, when she was fifteen, she almost paid the ultimate price. She was shot in the head at point-blank range while riding the bus home from school, and few expected her to survive. Instead, Malala's miraculous recovery has taken her on an extraordinary journey from a remote valley in northern Pakistan to the halls of the United Nations in New York. At sixteen, she became a global symbol of peaceful protest and the youngest nominee ever for the Nobel Peace Prize. I AM MALALA is the remarkable tale of a family uprooted by global terrorism, of the fight for girls' education, of a father who, himself a school owner, championed and encouraged his daughter to write and attend school, and of brave parents who have a fierce love for their daughter in a society that prizes sons. I AM MALALA will make you believe in the power of one person's voice to inspire change in the world.

Download or read book Quit Calling Me a Monster written by Jory John and published by RH Childrens Books. This book was released on 2016-08-23 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The talented creators of I Will Chomp You! brilliantly frame the struggle to buck stereotypes and learn empathy in this monster’s hilarious lament. Floyd Peterson is so much more than shaggy purple fur and pointy monster teeth— why can’t people just see him for him? Jory John and Bob Shea have struck gold in creating a knee-slapping, read-it-again story that will start a valuable discussion about how we treat others and how it feels to be seen as “different.”

Download or read book Fixing Delilah written by Sarah Ockler and published by Two Gnomes Media. This book was released on 2010 with total page 270 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "We all long for what could have been." Things in Delilah Hannaford's life have a tendency to fall apart. She used to be a good student, but she can't seem to keep it together anymore. Her "boyfriend" isn't much of a boyfriend. And her mother refuses to discuss the fight that divided their family eight years ago. Falling apart, it seems, is a Hannaford tradition. Over a summer of new friendships, unexpected romance, and moments that test the complex bonds between mothers and daughters, Delilah must face her family's painful past. Can even her most shattered relationships be pieced back together again?