Download or read book Santaland Diaries written by David Sedaris and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2010-08-05 with total page 89 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collection of surprising, disarming and 'extremely funny' essays from the internationally bestselling author of Me Talk Pretty One Day (Sunday Times) Santaland Diaries collects six of David Sedaris's most profound Christmas stories into one slender volume perfect for use as a last-minute coaster or ice-scraper. This drinking man's companion can be enjoyed by the warmth of a raging fire, the glow of a brilliantly decorated tree, or even in the back seat of a police car. It should be read with your eyes, felt with your heart, and heard only when spoken to. It should, in short, behave much like a book. And oh, what a book it is! 'Sedaris writes with a gentle but unfailing acuity and a keen eye for the ridiculous ... extremely funny' -Sunday Times

Download or read book I m a Gnome written by Jessica Peill-Meininghaus and published by Crown Books for Young Readers. This book was released on 2019-08-13 with total page 21 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Fans of Mo Willems and Dev Petty's I Don't Want to Be a Frog will love this humorous tale about one gnome's journey to prove he is unlike the other magical creatures in the forest. Join Gnome (that's spelled G-N-O-M-E--don't ask why the G is silent!) as he travels through the magical forest to attend the annual Gnome Festival. Along the way he encounters elves, dwarves, trolls, and fairies. But don't be mistaken. He is NOTHING like those magical creatures. Well, maybe he is . . . but only a little bit! When Gnome finally arrives at the festival, he realizes that all the traits he thought made gnomes different from the others actually made them alike--and that's just fine.

Download or read book How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack written by Chuck Sambuchino and published by Random House. This book was released on 2014-06-05 with total page 114 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: There’s a new threat in town – and it’s only twelve inches tall. How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack is the only comprehensive survival guide that will help you prevent, prepare for, and ward off an imminent home invasion by the common garden gnome. Once thought of as harmless garden decorations, evidence is mounting that these smiling lawn statues are poised and ready to wreck havoc. The danger is real. And it’s here. Class 1 gnome-slayer and gnome defence expert Chuck Sambuchino has developed a proven system – Assess, Protect, Defend, Apply – for safeguarding property, possessions, and loved ones. Strategies include step-by-step instructions for gnome-proofing the average dwelling, recognising and interpreting the signs of a gathering horde and – in the event that a secured perimeter is breached – confronting and combating the attackers at close range.

Download or read book Holidays on Ice written by David Sedaris and published by Little, Brown. This book was released on 2009-05-04 with total page 140 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: David Sedaris's beloved holiday collection is new again with six more pieces, including a never before published story. Along with such favoritesas the diaries of a Macy's elf and the annals of two very competitive families, are Sedaris's tales of tardy trick-or-treaters ("Us and Them"); the difficulties of explaining the Easter Bunny to the French ("Jesus Shaves"); what to do when you've been locked out in a snowstorm ("Let It Snow"); the puzzling Christmas traditions of other nations ("Six to Eight Black Men"); what Halloween at the medical examiner's looks like ("The Monster Mash"); and a barnyard secret Santa scheme gone awry ("Cow and Turkey"). No matter what your favorite holiday, you won't want to miss celebrating it with the author who has been called "one of the funniest writers alive" (Economist).

Download or read book No No Gnome written by Ashlyn Anstee and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-02-09 with total page 40 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: For fans of Don’t Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus! and No, David! comes a tale about a very small gnome who has some very big ideas about the school garden. Gnome cannot wait to help his friends harvest the school garden! But his eagerness and excitement get him into trouble, leaving them all saying, “No, no, Gnome!” The author/illustrator of Are We There, Yeti? delivers a sweet new picture book starring a loveable little hero who has a whole lot of energy...and heart.

Download or read book The Hermit in the Garden written by Gordon Campbell and published by OUP Oxford. This book was released on 2013-03-28 with total page 199 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Tracing its distant origins to the villa of the Roman emperor Hadrian in the second century AD, the eccentric phenomenon of the ornamental hermit enjoyed its heyday in the England of the eighteenth century It was at this time that it became highly fashionable for owners of country estates to commission architectural follies for their landscape gardens. These follies often included hermitages, many of which still survive, often in a ruined state. Landowners peopled their hermitages either with imaginary hermits or with real hermits - in some cases the landowner even became his own hermit. Those who took employment as garden hermits were typically required to refrain from cutting their hair or washing, and some were dressed as druids. Unlike the hermits of the Middle Ages, these were wholly secular hermits, products of the eighteenth century fondness for 'pleasing melancholy'. Although the fashion for them had fizzled out by the end of the eighteenth century, they had left their indelible mark on both the literature as well as the gardens of the period. And, as Gordon Campbell shows, they live on in the art, literature, and drama of our own day - as well as in the figure of the modern-day garden gnome. This engaging and generously illustrated book takes the reader on a journey that is at once illuminating and whimsical, both through the history of the ornamental hermit and also around the sites of many of the surviving hermitages themselves, which remain scattered throughout England, Scotland, and Ireland. And for the real enthusiast, there is even a comprehensive checklist, enabling avid hermitage-hunters to locate their prey.

Download or read book Santa Baby written by Jonathan Stutzman and published by Henry Holt and Company (BYR). This book was released on 2020-09-08 with total page 25 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Jonathan Stutzman and Heather Fox, the duo behind Llama Destroys the World, take their trademark hijinks up to the North Pole in this laugh-out-loud, heartfelt Christmas-themed picture book. Santa is feeling old, and being in the business of Christmas for centuries is . . . well, it isn't all milk and cookies. In hopes of regaining some of his pep, Santa asks the spirit of Christmas to give him something for a change: skim off a couple of years and make him younger. But Christmas magic is powerful, and Santa gets more than he wished for. Instead of a fresh new outlook and boundless energy, he needs diapers and a nap—stat. With Christmas only a few days away, the elves rush to teach Santa Baby the basics. But will there be enough time to prepare their new bundle of holiday joy for the job? Funny and spirited, bright and inspiring, and with an unforgettable title, Santa Baby is destined to be a yuletide read families revisit every year.

Download or read book Ask a Manager written by Alison Green and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2018-05-01 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the creator of the popular website Ask a Manager and New York’s work-advice columnist comes a witty, practical guide to 200 difficult professional conversations—featuring all-new advice! There’s a reason Alison Green has been called “the Dear Abby of the work world.” Ten years as a workplace-advice columnist have taught her that people avoid awkward conversations in the office because they simply don’t know what to say. Thankfully, Green does—and in this incredibly helpful book, she tackles the tough discussions you may need to have during your career. You’ll learn what to say when • coworkers push their work on you—then take credit for it • you accidentally trash-talk someone in an email then hit “reply all” • you’re being micromanaged—or not being managed at all • you catch a colleague in a lie • your boss seems unhappy with your work • your cubemate’s loud speakerphone is making you homicidal • you got drunk at the holiday party Praise for Ask a Manager “A must-read for anyone who works . . . [Alison Green’s] advice boils down to the idea that you should be professional (even when others are not) and that communicating in a straightforward manner with candor and kindness will get you far, no matter where you work.”—Booklist (starred review) “The author’s friendly, warm, no-nonsense writing is a pleasure to read, and her advice can be widely applied to relationships in all areas of readers’ lives. Ideal for anyone new to the job market or new to management, or anyone hoping to improve their work experience.”—Library Journal (starred review) “I am a huge fan of Alison Green’s Ask a Manager column. This book is even better. It teaches us how to deal with many of the most vexing big and little problems in our workplaces—and to do so with grace, confidence, and a sense of humor.”—Robert Sutton, Stanford professor and author of The No Asshole Rule and The Asshole Survival Guide “Ask a Manager is the ultimate playbook for navigating the traditional workforce in a diplomatic but firm way.”—Erin Lowry, author of Broke Millennial: Stop Scraping By and Get Your Financial Life Together

Download or read book Happy Go Lucky written by David Sedaris and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2022-05-31 with total page 225 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: David Sedaris, the “champion storyteller,” (Los Angeles Times) returns with his first new collection of personal essays since the bestselling Calypso Back when restaurant menus were still printed on paper, and wearing a mask—or not—was a decision made mostly on Halloween, David Sedaris spent his time doing normal things. As Happy-Go-Lucky opens, he is learning to shoot guns with his sister, visiting muddy flea markets in Serbia, buying gummy worms to feed to ants, and telling his nonagenarian father wheelchair jokes. But then the pandemic hits, and like so many others, he’s stuck in lockdown, unable to tour and read for audiences, the part of his work he loves most. To cope, he walks for miles through a nearly deserted city, smelling only his own breath. He vacuums his apartment twice a day, fails to hoard anything, and contemplates how sex workers and acupuncturists might be getting by during quarantine. As the world gradually settles into a new reality, Sedaris too finds himself changed. His offer to fix a stranger’s teeth rebuffed, he straightens his own, and ventures into the world with new confidence. Newly orphaned, he considers what it means, in his seventh decade, no longer to be someone’s son. And back on the road, he discovers a battle-scarred America: people weary, storefronts empty or festooned with Help Wanted signs, walls painted with graffiti reflecting the contradictory messages of our time: Eat the Rich. Trump 2024. Black Lives Matter. In Happy-Go-Lucky, David Sedaris once again captures what is most unexpected, hilarious, and poignant about these recent upheavals, personal and public, and expresses in precise language both the misanthropy and desire for connection that drive us all. If we must live in interesting times, there is no one better to chronicle them than the incomparable David Sedaris.

Download or read book Go BIG Or Go Gnome written by Kirsten Mayer and published by . This book was released on 2017-03-14 with total page 44 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Although unable to grow a beard, Al the garden gnome, after discovering his talent for barbering, wins a special award at the beard contest.

Download or read book Llama Destroys the World written by Jonathan Stutzman and published by Henry Holt and Company (BYR). This book was released on 2019-05-07 with total page 25 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet Llama, the next great picture-book megastar, who has most definitely driven a bus and who loves tacos way more than you. He also loves cake, and that’s where our story begins. On Monday, Llama discovers a pile of cake, which he promptly eats. On Tuesday, Llama squeezes into his dancing pants, which he promptly rips. The force of the rip creates a black hole (naturally). By Friday, Llama will (indirectly) destroy the world. In their debut picture book, author/illustrator team Jonathan Stutzman and Heather Fox introduce young readers to the comical, the studious, the oblivious Llama, a picture-book hero for the ages. So grab some cake and your dancing pants and prepare for Llama Destroys the World... because THE TIME FOR LLAMA IS NIGH!

Download or read book The Art and Science of Teaching written by Robert J. Marzano and published by ASCD. This book was released on 2007 with total page 233 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Presents a model for ensuring quality teaching that balances the necessity of research-based data with the equally vital need to understand the strengths and weaknesses of individual students.

Download or read book Scaredy Squirrel Prepares for Christmas written by Melanie Watt and published by Kids Can Press Ltd. This book was released on 2012-10 with total page 84 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: According to Scaredy Squirrel, Christmas is indeed the most wonderful time of the year, but it's also the scariest. Luckily, Scaredy is prepared - and you can be, too! He's put together this Safety Guide which is full of advice for dealing with potential dangers one might face during the festive season. Included are step-by-step instructions for building a gingerbread house, a shopping guide for tricky personality types and a variety of safety tips throughout. Last but not least, at the end of the book is Scaredy's all-encompassing sure-fire solution: If all else fails... play dead!

Download or read book A Gnome s Christmas written by Rien Poortvliet and published by Harry N. Abrams. This book was released on 2004-12-01 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Featuring candid photographs of garden gnomes, this charming follow-up to the "The Secret Lives of Gnomes" offers detailed information about the various customs that gnomes hold during Christmastime. Full color.

Download or read book David Wood Plays for 5 12 Year Olds written by David Wood and published by Bloomsbury Publishing. This book was released on 2021-04-08 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Looking for a whizzpoppingly wonderful collection of plays for your whole class? Want some ready-made, delumptious lesson plans to accompany them? Biffsquiggled at the thought of how to stage these pieces? Well, look no further because this is a scrumdiddlyumptious selection of David Wood's plays; paired with all the information and materials you need to use them in class or on stage, edited by Paul Bateson, an experienced primary-level drama teacher. The plays create worlds that trigger children's imaginations as well as entertain them, make them think as well as make them laugh, and open their minds to new ideas and the power of storytelling through theatre. Plays included are: The Gingerbread Man The See-Saw Tree The BFG Save the Human Mother Goose's Golden Christmas This book also contains a new foreword by David Wood.

Download or read book Material Obsession written by Kathy Doughty and published by Allen & Unwin. This book was released on 2008 with total page 209 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Explains how anyone, even those who don't think they are 'creative' can confidently choose colours and patterns to create bold, easy-to-make quilts, perfect for today's busy craftspeople.

Download or read book Dramatics written by and published by . This book was released on 1964 with total page 610 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: