Download or read book Damn You Autocorrect written by Jillian Madison and published by Random House. This book was released on 2012-05-31 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Damn You, Autocorrect! brings together some of the laugh-out-loud funny and painfully embarrassing posts from the hit website, which highlight the hilarity that often ensues when text messaging goes wrong: girlfriends getting together for 'manila penis,'(mani pedis); a husband texting his wife that he 'laid' the babysitter (paid); a friend asking if someone got tickets to the 'Lady Vagina' (Lady Gaga) concert, and the most popular image on the website so far: a father texting his daughter that he and his mother were going to divorce, when they were in fact just going to Disney. Oops. The phenomenally successful Damnyouautocorrect.com began when author Jillian Madison innocently tried to invite some friends over for gelato. Autocorrect, however, had another idea, and asked them over for a night of 'fellatio' instead. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. Damn You, Autocorrect! includes 200 never before seen submissions to the website, as well as an introduction from the author and website creator, Jillian Madison.

Download or read book Damn You Autocorrect 2 written by Lyndsey Saul and published by Random House. This book was released on 2013-10-28 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: It's back. And it's more awkward than ever. Ever been screwed over by predictive text on your smart phone? You are not alone. Damn You, Autocorrect! 2 brings together more of the laugh-out-loud funny and painfully embarrassing posts from the hit website, which highlight the hilarity that often ensues when text messaging goes wrong. This second volume of epic autocorrect fails is packed with never-before-seen content, as well as the most cringe-worthy posts from Damnyouautocorrect.com. READ THIS BOOK BEFORE YOU HIT SEND.

Download or read book Texts From Last Night written by Lauren Leto and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2010-01-26 with total page 151 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In the tradition of The Truth About Chuck Norris, PostSecret, and I Can Has Cheezburger?, Texts from Last Night celebrates the funniest and most outrageous text messages from the instantly popular website There are few forms of communication that are more entertaining, appalling, and laugh-out-loud hilarious than the text message--especially when it's received in the wee hours of the morning from a friend who has had one too many shots of tequila. Texts from Last Night is a celebration of the best, worst, and weirdest text messages that have ever been sent, such as: •Before i could say "i'm not the kind of girl," i was •I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti •The ticket read "found nude in a tree" Texts from Last Night is chock full of LOL and WTF moments and will make any thumb-typer :) in recognition. Read Ben Bator and Lauren Leto's post on the Penguin Blog.

Download or read book When Parents Text written by Lauren Kaelin and published by Workman Publishing. This book was released on 2011-01-01 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Complies some web entries with new, unpublished material and organized the entries into categories, including birthdays, entertainment, and parental wisdom.

Download or read book Dear Asshole written by Jillian Madison and published by Running Press Adult. This book was released on 2011-08-02 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dear Asshole includes 101 letters to tell off all the assholes you encounter on a daily basis, each letter conveniently perforated so you can tear it out and give it to the desired offender. The world is full of assholes -- but now you can fight back! Ever wish you could leave a nasty note for that jerk meter maid who ticketed you, or the idiot who didn't clean up after his dog, or your asshole psychotic ex? Now you can! Whether it's the asshole landlord, the asshole cheapskate, the asshole backseat driver, or the constantly cheery asshole, you should never leave home without this useful book ever again! Letters include: Dear Asshole Who Stole My Parking Space Dear Asshole Who Doesn't Know How to Use Self-Checkout Dear Contagious Asshole Dear Constantly Broke Asshole Dear Online Dating Asshole Who Lied About Their Looks Dear Asshole Boss Dear Fanatically Religious Asshole at My Door And more!

Download or read book Hyperbole and a Half written by Allie Brosh and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-10-29 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 New York Times Bestseller “Funny and smart as hell” (Bill Gates), Allie Brosh’s Hyperbole and a Half showcases her unique voice, leaping wit, and her ability to capture complex emotions with deceptively simple illustrations. FROM THE PUBLISHER: Every time Allie Brosh posts something new on her hugely popular blog Hyperbole and a Half the internet rejoices. This full-color, beautifully illustrated edition features more than fifty percent new content, with ten never-before-seen essays and one wholly revised and expanded piece as well as classics from the website like, “The God of Cake,” “Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving,” and her astonishing, “Adventures in Depression,” and “Depression Part Two,” which have been hailed as some of the most insightful meditations on the disease ever written. Brosh’s debut marks the launch of a major new American humorist who will surely make even the biggest scrooge or snob laugh. We dare you not to. FROM THE AUTHOR: This is a book I wrote. Because I wrote it, I had to figure out what to put on the back cover to explain what it is. I tried to write a long, third-person summary that would imply how great the book is and also sound vaguely authoritative—like maybe someone who isn’t me wrote it—but I soon discovered that I’m not sneaky enough to pull it off convincingly. So I decided to just make a list of things that are in the book: Pictures Words Stories about things that happened to me Stories about things that happened to other people because of me Eight billion dollars* Stories about dogs The secret to eternal happiness* *These are lies. Perhaps I have underestimated my sneakiness!

Download or read book Ready Player Two written by Ernest Cline and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2020-11-24 with total page 385 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • The thrilling sequel to the beloved worldwide bestseller Ready Player One, the near-future adventure that inspired the blockbuster Steven Spielberg film. NAMED ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR BY THE WASHINGTON POST • “The game is on again. . . . A great mix of exciting fantasy and threatening fact.”—The Wall Street Journal AN UNEXPECTED QUEST. TWO WORLDS AT STAKE. ARE YOU READY? Days after winning OASIS founder James Halliday’s contest, Wade Watts makes a discovery that changes everything. Hidden within Halliday’s vaults, waiting for his heir to find, lies a technological advancement that will once again change the world and make the OASIS a thousand times more wondrous—and addictive—than even Wade dreamed possible. With it comes a new riddle, and a new quest—a last Easter egg from Halliday, hinting at a mysterious prize. And an unexpected, impossibly powerful, and dangerous new rival awaits, one who’ll kill millions to get what he wants. Wade’s life and the future of the OASIS are again at stake, but this time the fate of humanity also hangs in the balance. Lovingly nostalgic and wildly original as only Ernest Cline could conceive it, Ready Player Two takes us on another imaginative, fun, action-packed adventure through his beloved virtual universe, and jolts us thrillingly into the future once again.

Download or read book Ink in the Blood written by Kim Smejkal and published by HMH Books For Young Readers. This book was released on 2020 with total page 453 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Celia and Anya, friends who use tattoo magic to send divine messages, must rely on one another to survive when they discover the fake deity they serve is very real--and very angry.

Download or read book Between the Lines written by Jodi Picoult and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-06-25 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Told in their separate voices, sixteen-year-old Prince Oliver, who wants to break free of his fairy-tale existence, and fifteen-year-old Delilah, a loner obsessed with Prince Oliver and the book in which he exists, work together to seek his freedom.

Download or read book Barking to the Choir written by Greg Boyle and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-11-14 with total page 224 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A Jesuit priest and founder of Homeboy Industries traces his experiences of working with gangs in Los Angeles for three decades, sharing what his efforts have taught him about faith, compassion, and the enduring power of radical kinship.

Download or read book Dark Age written by Pierce Brown and published by Del Rey. This book was released on 2019-07-30 with total page 907 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • The bestselling author of Morning Star returns to the Red Rising universe with the thrilling sequel to Iron Gold. “Brown’s plots are like a depth charge of nitromethane dropped in a bucket of gasoline. His pacing is 100% him standing over it all with a lit match and a smile, waiting for us to dare him to drop it.”—NPR (Best Books of the Year) He broke the chains. Then he broke the world…. A decade ago Darrow led a revolution, and laid the foundations for a new world. Now he’s an outlaw. Cast out of the very Republic he founded, with half his fleet destroyed, he wages a rogue war on Mercury. Outnumbered and outgunned, is he still the hero who broke the chains? Or will he become the very evil he fought to destroy? In his darkening shadow, a new hero rises. Lysander au Lune, the displaced heir to the old empire, has returned to bridge the divide between the Golds of the Rim and Core. If united, their combined might may prove fatal to the fledgling Republic. On Luna, the embattled Sovereign of the Republic, Virginia au Augustus, fights to preserve her precious demokracy and her exiled husband. But one may cost her the other, and her son is not yet returned. Abducted by enemy agents, Pax au Augustus must trust in a Gray thief, Ephraim, for his salvation. Far across the void, Lyria, a Red refugee accused of treason, makes a desperate bid for freedom with the help of two unlikely new allies. Fear dims the hopes of the Rising, and as power is seized, lost, and reclaimed, the worlds spin on and on toward a new Dark Age. Don’t miss any of Pierce Brown’s Red Rising Saga: RED RISING • GOLDEN SON • MORNING STAR • IRON GOLD • DARK AGE • LIGHT BRINGER

Download or read book Moms Who Drink and Swear written by Nicole Knepper and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2013-04-02 with total page 337 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If you feel like your kids are killing you, you’ve come to the right place. This irreverant, hilarious guide to the trials of motherhood makes the perfect gift for mom—or any woman with a huge heart and a mouth that sometimes needs washing out with soap. Attention all potty-mouthed, cheap-wine-drinking mothers: Prepare to meet your match. Any bad thought you’ve had about your kids, Nicole Knepper has had worse. Much worse. It’s not that she doesn’t love her kids. It’s that she understands what a mind-f*?% it can be to try to civilize those wild little beasts. Based on her hugely popular Facebook page, “Moms Who Drink and Swear,” this book reveals why family dinners are like herpes, how to avoid smashing toys that are being fought over, and the joy of hearing that your son has murdered his imaginary friend. As Nicole rants and raves about caring for children (without crushing their souls), family togetherness (without too many tears), the saving grace of girlfriends (and vodka), and love and marriage (and all the baggage that goes with them), she gets to the heart of what every exasperated mom is thinking, just much funnier.

Download or read book Between Two Fires written by Christopher Buehlman and published by Ace. This book was released on 2013 with total page 466 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Buehlman...slips effortlessly into a different kind of literary sensibility, one that doesn't scrimp on earthy humor and lyrical writing in the face of unspeakable horrors."* The year is 1348. Thomas, a disgraced knight, has found an orphan of the Black Death in a Norman village. An almost unnerving picture of innocence, she tells Thomas that the plague is only part of a larger cataclysm--that the fallen angels under Lucifer are rising in a second war on Heaven. But is it delirium or is it faith? She believes she has seen the angels of God. She believes the dead speak to her in dreams. And now she has convinced the faithless Thomas to shepherd her across an apocalyptic landscape to Avignon. There, she tells Thomas, she will fulfill her mission. There her true nature will be revealed. And there Thomas will confront an evil wrestling for the throne of Heaven, and which has poisoned his own soul. *Kirkus Reviews

Download or read book Damn Delicious written by Rhee, Chungah and published by Time Inc. Books. This book was released on 2016-09-06 with total page 240 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The debut cookbook by the creator of the wildly popular blog Damn Delicious proves that quick and easy doesn't have to mean boring.Blogger Chungah Rhee has attracted millions of devoted fans with recipes that are undeniable 'keepers'-each one so simple, so easy, and so flavor-packed, that you reach for them busy night after busy night. In Damn Delicious, she shares exclusive new recipes as well as her most beloved dishes, all designed to bring fun and excitement into everyday cooking. From five-ingredient Mini Deep Dish Pizzas to no-fuss Sheet Pan Steak & Veggies and 20-minute Spaghetti Carbonara, the recipes will help even the most inexperienced cooks spend less time in the kitchen and more time around the table.Packed with quickie breakfasts, 30-minute skillet sprints, and speedy takeout copycats, this cookbook is guaranteed to inspire readers to whip up fast, healthy, homemade meals that are truly 'damn delicious!'

Download or read book The New Titans 1994 2001 80 written by Marv Wolfman and published by DC Comics. This book was released on 1991-09-17 with total page 28 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Meet the all New Teen Titans - Nightrider, Kilowatt, Mirage, Redwing, and...Terra?! Yeah, that's right, Terra! Where did this new group of teenage heroes come from, and what is their mission?

Download or read book Mastering Emacs written by Mickey Petersen and published by . This book was released on 2015-05-26 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Tunerville written by A. Elizabeth West and published by . This book was released on 2020-01-06 with total page 324 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: If you've ever wondered what would happen if you could meet a ghost, talk to it, or even touch it, this book is for you! Paranormal investigator Chris Taylor really wants to see a ghost. So he invents a remote control that tunes them back into the physical world. Hoping to help stranded spirits, he sells the rights to a TV network, only to see his gadget disrupt both earthly and unearthly society. The tuner's effect on humanity threatens the dimension that houses the afterlife, known as the Realm. Its Directorate sends an emissary, Callahan, to oversee a solution: Chris must persuade people to stop using his invention. The living don't want to give up the tuners - and neither do the dead. Chris enlists help from his friends, Callahan, and a groovy Seventies ghost and begins a clumsy romance with activist Hannah Lively. But when a scientist bent on glory tweaks the tuner and opens a dangerous portal, they're forced to devise a perilous plan to stop her. What follows takes Chris on a journey he never imagined, one that could ultimately cost him everything.