Download or read book Dad Jokes for New Dads written by Jimmy Niro and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2020-05-01 with total page 115 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The perfect Christmas gift for new dads and expecting fathers! A punderful resource of the funniest dad jokes that every dad needs in their arsenal! With over 500 brand new jokes on a range of topics to get dads ready to embarrass their children—and most importantly—embarrass them early, this laugh-out-loud book is a hilarious gift great for baby showers, holiday stocking stuffers, Father's Day, and beyond! From USA Today bestselling author Jimmy Niro, Dad Jokes for New Dads is a special edition joke book for new parents and soon-to-be fathers that celebrates dads with a full arsenal of dad jokes, silly quips, witty one-liners, and "helpful" pro tips to help them get by! A funny white elephant gag gift from any kid, wife, or partner to celebrate and prepare the new dad in their life! Includes knee-slappers like: Q: What did the big beer name its baby? A: Micro brew. I wrote a book about birds once. My publisher said it flew off the shelves! Dad Pro Tip #1: If the baby starts to spit up, turn it toward someone else.

Download or read book The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes written by Gordon Hideaki Nagai and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-05-10 with total page 118 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A MASSIVE COLLECTION OF LAUGHABLE, CHEESY JOKES PERFECT FOR AMUSING DADS WHILE SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSING THE KIDS As groan-inducing as they are hilarious, dad jokes are the punny one-liners and oh-so-clever quips fathers never tire of telling. With this massive collection, no Dad will ever lack new material to make his kids facepalm: • A watermelon and a honeydew wanted to get married right away, but they cantaloupe. • After Humpty Dumpty recovered from his fall, he was just a shell of his former self. • Sign language interpreters have to lean sideways to translate something in italics. • Anyone with a wheat allergy that routinely eats pasta is just a gluten for punishment. • A chord walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bartender said, “We don’t serve minors.”

Download or read book My Dad Thinks He s Funny written by Katrina Germein and published by Candlewick Press. This book was released on 2013-04-09 with total page 33 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A gift-appropriate story for kids features a long-suffering boy's eye-rolling observations of his father's bombastic and often corny sense of humor, which is comprised of groan-out-loud puns and wisecracking rejoinders.

Download or read book Philogelos written by R. D. Dawe and published by B. G. Teubner Gmbh. This book was released on 2000-06-01 with total page 156 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Knock Knock Jokes for Kids Laugh Out Loud Jokes for Kids written by Rob Elliott and published by Baker Books. This book was released on 2013-06-15 with total page 126 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Kids can't get enough of laughter--so they can't get enough of Rob Elliot's hilarious joke books! Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids is an all-new collection of knock-knock jokes that will have kids and kids-at-heart rolling in the aisles. Jokes like Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben away for a while but I'm back now With more than 2 million copies sold of his first book, Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids, it's clear that kids (and their adults) are looking for clean, lighthearted humor--and Rob Elliott delivers.

Download or read book Dad Jokes written by Editors of Portable Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-09-01 with total page 254 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dad’s comedy arsenal is about to get a huge upgrade . . . to the relief of everyone around him! Cue the groans. Put an end to courtesy laughs and awkward silences with the jokes in this book! From the people who brought you Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader, this is an eclectic collection of the punniest, funniest, most outrageous knee-slappers that have ever been told! At work, at home, at the game—Dad will beat them all to the punch—line, that is! He’ll be hip and humorous with totally bodacious jokes like these: Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too! Why is Christmas just like another day in the office? Because you do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit! Dad: “I wouldn’t want to be buried in this graveyard.” Kid: “Why not?” Dad: “Because I'm not dead yet!” And many more!

Download or read book Dad Is Fat written by Jim Gaffigan and published by Crown Archetype. This book was released on 2013-05-07 with total page 290 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Jim Gaffigan never imagined he would have his own kids. Though he grew up in a large Irish-Catholic family, Jim was satisfied with the nomadic, nocturnal life of a standup comedian, and was content to be "that weird uncle who lives in an apartment by himself in New York that everyone in the family speculates about." But all that changed when he married and found out his wife, Jeannie "is someone who gets pregnant looking at babies." Five kids later, the comedian whose riffs on everything from Hot Pockets to Jesus have scored millions of hits on YouTube, started to tweet about the mistakes and victories of his life as a dad. Those tweets struck such a chord that he soon passed the million followers mark. But it turns out 140 characters are not enough to express all the joys and horrors of life with five kids, so he's now sharing it all in Dad Is Fat. From new parents to empty nesters to Jim's twenty-something fans, everyone will recognize their own families in these hilarious takes on everything from cousins ("celebrities for little kids") to growing up in a big family ("I always assumed my father had six children so he could have a sufficient lawn crew") to changing diapers in the middle of the night ("like The Hurt Locker but much more dangerous") to bedtime (aka "Negotiating with Terrorists"). Dad is Fat is sharply observed, explosively funny, and a cry for help from a man who has realized he and his wife are outnumbered in their own home.

Download or read book 1000 Dad Jokes The Dreadfully Good Joke Book for Dads and Their Kids written by Hayden Fox and published by Independently Published. This book was released on 2019-02-12 with total page 164 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: What do you get when you cross a vampire with a snowman? Frostbite! 1000 Dreadfully Good Dad Jokes that will keep everyone either laughing or groaning for hours on end! Also makes for a perfect Father's Day gift. Add to Cart Now if you are ready for some dreadfully good entertainment! **Get the Kindle edition for FREE when you buy the paperback.**

Download or read book The Ultimate Dad Joke Book written by Hugh Murmie and published by . This book was released on 2020-05-10 with total page 108 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New for 2020! Easy Father's Day gift for your favorite guy! The Ultimate Dad Joke Book is jam packed with family friendly, clean and hysterical jokes that are great for everyone from your toddler to your great-grandma! Buckle up and get ready for some knee slapping, head shaking and gut busting laughter every time you flip a page. Over 500 hilarious jokes, puns and one-liners Squeaky clean, family safe jokes for kids (and adults) of all ages Great selection of time honored classics and all new jokes for 2020 Grab your copy today and channel your inner dad with some amazingly groan worthy humor bombs!

Download or read book A Dad Joke a Day written by DaddiLife Books and published by . This book was released on 2021-05-19 with total page 190 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Looking for the perfect gift for dad? Then keep reading... Unleash dads' ultimate superpower with a terribly good dad joke for EVERYDAY of the year! Can A Dad Joke A Day keep the doctor away? Perhaps not. But a dad joke in the right hands can keep the kids and family on their toes, and at their eye rolling best! In this book from DaddiLife Books - the dads and writers behind the leading platform for modern day fathers - there's a different clean and family friendly dad joke everyday, with groan worthy tummy ticklers on specific calendar days of the year too (see if you can spot them all). What makes this book of dad jokes a special gift: Create a little family fun, everyday - A different cheesy and punny dad joke for every day of the year, including Leap Years, so dad can be top of his dad joke game 24/7 with knee slappers such as: Why was the broom running late? It over-swept. And, What do you call a hen who counts her eggs? A mathemachicken. Understand the science behind the dad joke - How our brains understand dad jokes differently to normal jokes, and the psychology behind a great dad joke versus an average dad joke. Sharpen your joke telling - Whether for new dads or (ahem) more experienced dads, for those who need a cheesy dad joke for a wedding speech or an everyday family laugh, this book has the best advice from across the DaddiLife community on how to tell a dad joke to its very finest, even if you have never told a dad joke before (seriously, where have you been)! Tell dad jokes on specific days of the year - Whether it's New Year, Christmas, or Star Wars day, you won't just be funny, but hilariously punny with these bad dad jokes! What Amazon readers are saying: ★★★★★ "An easy read, silly, and a great way to get the family involved and laughing together." ★★★★★ "Bought for my husband. He really likes it. He looks at more than one per day though because he can't resist learning new dad jokes." ★★★★★ "I could not help laughing my a** off reading these." ★★★★★ "The kids love the jokes and keep poring through the pages to find a new joke to tell us and their Dad has really enjoyed learning the science behind the dad joke and how to tell the perfect dad joke." ★★★★★ "The jokes themselves are exactly what you want from a dad joke - cringey, tut-inducing, eye-rolling. As soon as I got the book, we started by reading a joke from our family's birthdays." If you're looking for a fantastic gift for dad for Father's Day, Birthdays or Christmas, arm Dad with everything he needs for his ultimate mission - joining the Dad Joke Hall of Fame - by clicking the Add to Cart button.

Download or read book The Minstrel Guide and Joke Book written by Paul Emilius Lowe and published by . This book was released on 1912 with total page 108 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Big Joke book written by Carleton Britton Case and published by . This book was released on 1919 with total page 332 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book RAD DAD JOKES so gosh darn funny your socks will fall down written by Venti Vinny and published by VENTI VINNY. This book was released on 2022-12-06 with total page 134 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Super Fun Collection!! Over 800+ Super Rad Dad Jokes for Every Dad Joke Book Lover, the Perfect Gift for All Ages! Overloaded with Terribly Amazing, Family-Friendly Groans, Chuckles, Knee-Slapping, Sock-Falling Belly Laughs. (Humor Joke Kid Adult Family Book Collection) Dad Jokes, Joke Book, Father, Dad, Son, Daughter, Rad What’s more amusing than watching your dad repeat the same ole jokes year after year and watch the room squirm uncomfortably because they are just that bad...or good? You’ve heard that joke so many times you can repeat it word for word. Who doesn’t love Dad jokes?!? We definitely love our dad for telling punny one-liners and making him think he has quite the gift of gab…and jab. Gift your dad the ultimate book to polish up his storyteller skills and have the room in tears – because they can’t take it anymore! Dad Jokes are the best! This collection will get Dad’s creative juices flowing and he’ll love these corny, off the wall puns and riddles. So, sit back and watch him take immense pleasure in seeing people laugh (and groan) from the blatant simplicity of a few crafty words. You look at him, sigh, and all you can say is, “That’s MY Dad?”

Download or read book The Super Duper Joke Book Volume 1 written by Editors of Cider Mill Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-07-02 with total page 192 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Presents a series of jokes, puns, and wordplay about school, animals, and monsters.

Download or read book The Big Fat Father Christmas Joke Book written by Terry Deary and published by Scholastic UK. This book was released on 2013-10-03 with total page 155 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In THE BIG FAT FATHER CHRISTMAS JOKE BOOK ebook, Horrible Histories author, Terry Deary, brings you two hilarious books in one - Father Christmas' Joke Book and The Great Father Christmas Robbery - full of rib-tickling fun for the festive season. This brilliant bind-up is sure to keep you laughing right through to the New Year and beyond.

Download or read book Reflections in an Orphan s Eye written by A. L. Provost and published by Xlibris Corporation. This book was released on 2005 with total page 622 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The author practices Optometry in the Atlanta area, and serves as a legal consultant to optometrists and related health care professionals. He holds an undergraduate degree in Physics-Mathematics, and post-graduate degrees in Law and Optometry. Dr. Provost is a member of The Florida Bar and The Georgia Bar, and is licensed to practice Optometry in Florida and Georgia. He lives in an Atlanta suburb with his wife Evelyn, an attorney, and their four champion Persians, who have replaced in both intelligence and charm, four talented children who have gone on to careers in Optometry, teaching and real estate. The author graduated from Berry College near Rome, Georgia in 1961. While at Berry College in the late fifties the author was President of the Freshman Class, Treasurer of the Sophomore Class, Secretary, Vice-president and finally President of the Men's Student Government. At the end of his Junior year he became the first ever recipient of the Jessie Pritchett Parish Student Leadership Award, presented to the one student among the entire student body who best demonstrated leadership qualities on campus. While at Berry College the author rewrote the Berry College Handbook for Men. Following graduation in 1961, the author enlisted in the U. S. Army. He served two tours of duty in South Korea, the first as the feature writer for The Pacific Stars and Stripes newspaper, distributed daily to more than 37,000 U. S. soldiers in South Korea. The young reporter covered all meetings of the Military Armistice Commission (MAC) held at Panmunjom, and traveled freely throughout South Korea in his assigned Jeep, writing about anything of a military or civilian nature that interested him or that might be of interest to his readers. At age 24 the author was accepted as a student at the prestigious Defense Language Institute, located at Monterey, California, where he studied the Korean language for a year, graduating first in his class of thirty students. Following months of instruction at the U. S. Army Intelligence Center located at Ft. Holabird, Maryland, the author was stationed with the 502 Military Intelligence Battalion in Seoul, South Korea. As the youngest of the five prisoner interrogators and intelligence analysts, the specialist daily interrogated captured North Korean espionage agents and their 'minders" who had failed in their attempt to infiltrate the irregular coastline of South Korea. These experiences are the subject of the author's soon to be published book entitled The Wall at Inchon. In 1965 the author received an Honorable Discharge from the U. S. Army, and in 1967 was accepted as a student at the University of Houston College of Optometry. Dr. Provost graduated in 1972 with the degree Doctor of Optometry, and began his private practice of Optometry in the Ft. Lauderdale, Florida suburb of Plantation. In 1977 Dr. Provost was accepted into Nova Southeastern University College of Law, graduating in 1980 with the degree Juris Doctor. He has practiced Optometry since 1972 and Law since 1980, in Georgia and Florida. The author was born in Kinston, North Carolina in 1939, the knee baby of seven children. Following the sudden death of his father, a wartime U. S. civil service engineer, in February 1947 the seven-year-old was sent to live for a decade in historic Oxford Orphanage, located northeast of Raleigh. Dr. Provost's Reflections in An Orphan's Eye-A Decade at Oxford is the first book written about the historic 132-year-old institution since Nettie Bemis' popular Life at Oxford, published in1925. However, whereas Nettie Bemis' work centered around the history and campus life at Oxford, Dr. Provost's work, while recounting the history of the institution, is a factual, bittersweet narrative of a youngster's decade-long odyssey spent growing up 'inside the hedges." This work is a moving account of how tradition rich Oxford Orphanage and its four hundred students and staff grabbed a timid, disillusion

Download or read book Pretty Good Joke Book written by Garrison Keillor and published by Blackstone Publishing. This book was released on 2021-08-10 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 2,200 Jokes from America’s favorite live radio show A treasury of hilarity from Garrison Keillor and the cast of public radio’s A Prairie Home Companion. A guy walks into a bar. Eight Canada Geese walk into a bar. A termite jumps up on the bar and asks, “Where is the bar tender?” Drum roll. The Sixth Edition of the perennially popular Pretty Good Joke Book is everything the first five were and more. More puns, one-liners, light bulb jokes, knock-knock jokes, and third-grader jokes (have you heard the one about Elvis Parsley?). More religion jokes, political jokes, lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, and jokes in questionable taste (Why did the urologist lose his license? He got in trouble with his peers). More jokes about chickens, relationships, and senior moments (the nice thing about Alzheimer’s is you can enjoy the same jokes again and again). It all started back in 1996, when A Prairie Home Companion fans laughed themselves silly during the first Joke Show. The broadcast was such a hit that it became an almost-annual gagfest. Then fans wanted to read the jokes, share them, and pass them around, and the first Pretty Good Joke Book was born. With over 200 new and updated jokes, the latest edition promises countless giggles, chortles, and guffaws anyone—fans of the radio show or not—will enjoy.