Download or read book Dad Jokes written by Jimmy Niro and published by World's Best Dad Jokes Collection. This book was released on 2018 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The perfect gift for dads and pun-lovers alike "Dad, can you put my shoes on?" "No, I don't think they'll fit me." Ah, the dad joke--humor that reminds us of all the lovable, embarrassing dads out there. Be prepared for the obvious, silly, and awkward in this massive collection of the best groan-worthy dad jokes around, including clever quips, overly literal dialogue, and punny one-liners. These jokes may be on porpoise, but they whale definitely make you laugh: I used to hate facial hair, but then it started growing on me. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down Q: What's the hardest thing about learning to ride a bicycle? A: The road. With over 600 knee-slappers, head-shakers, and groan-makers, Dad Jokes is packed with enough witty quips and cheesy-but-grate jokes for you to hold your own against even the most embarrassing of dads. But remember--you don't have to be a dad to tell dad jokes
Download or read book Dad Jokes written by Editors of Portable Press and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2017-09-01 with total page 254 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Dad’s comedy arsenal is about to get a huge upgrade . . . to the relief of everyone around him! Cue the groans. Put an end to courtesy laughs and awkward silences with the jokes in this book! From the people who brought you Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader, this is an eclectic collection of the punniest, funniest, most outrageous knee-slappers that have ever been told! At work, at home, at the game—Dad will beat them all to the punch—line, that is! He’ll be hip and humorous with totally bodacious jokes like these: Einstein developed a theory about space. And it was about time, too! Why is Christmas just like another day in the office? Because you do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit! Dad: “I wouldn’t want to be buried in this graveyard.” Kid: “Why not?” Dad: “Because I'm not dead yet!” And many more!
Download or read book The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes written by Gordon Hideaki Nagai and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2016-05-10 with total page 118 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A MASSIVE COLLECTION OF LAUGHABLE, CHEESY JOKES PERFECT FOR AMUSING DADS WHILE SLIGHTLY EMBARRASSING THE KIDS As groan-inducing as they are hilarious, dad jokes are the punny one-liners and oh-so-clever quips fathers never tire of telling. With this massive collection, no Dad will ever lack new material to make his kids facepalm: • A watermelon and a honeydew wanted to get married right away, but they cantaloupe. • After Humpty Dumpty recovered from his fall, he was just a shell of his former self. • Sign language interpreters have to lean sideways to translate something in italics. • Anyone with a wheat allergy that routinely eats pasta is just a gluten for punishment. • A chord walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bartender said, “We don’t serve minors.”
Download or read book Dad Jokes for Kids written by Jimmy Niro and published by Sourcebooks, Inc.. This book was released on 2020-05-05 with total page 84 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Turn the bad jokes back on dad with this seriously silly joke book, the perfect funny Halloween gift for kids and families to laugh and celebrate together! Dads have been embarrassing their kids for decades with goofy and groan-worthy jokes, and now it's their children's turn! In this hilarious new joke book from USA Today bestselling author Jimmy Niro, kids can out-dad-joke their dads and even learn how to write some of their own. Filled with over 350 silly jokes about school, sports, animals, and more, Dad Jokes for Kids will have young readers rolling on the floor with laughter! Plus, children can learn to write their own dad jokes with fun activities in the back! This book is perfect for: The whole family - perfect for kids ages 7 to 12, but offers fun for the entire family! Reluctant readers - fun jokes help engage reluctant kids, helping them gain confidence and build reading comprehension and vocabulary Screen-free time - Endless laughs for road trips, vacations, sleepovers, game nights, and more! Gifts - makes a great holiday stocking stuffer, white elephant gag gift for kids, or Father's Day gift to share with dads Includes jokes like: Q: What did the carrot say to the broccoli? A: Nothing. Vegetables can't talk. You can't play hide-and-seek with mountains. They're always peaking.
Download or read book The Ultimate Dad Joke Book written by Hugh Murmie and published by . This book was released on 2020-05-10 with total page 108 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New for 2020! Easy Father's Day gift for your favorite guy! The Ultimate Dad Joke Book is jam packed with family friendly, clean and hysterical jokes that are great for everyone from your toddler to your great-grandma! Buckle up and get ready for some knee slapping, head shaking and gut busting laughter every time you flip a page. Over 500 hilarious jokes, puns and one-liners Squeaky clean, family safe jokes for kids (and adults) of all ages Great selection of time honored classics and all new jokes for 2020 Grab your copy today and channel your inner dad with some amazingly groan worthy humor bombs!
Download or read book The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes written by Ian Allen and published by Portico. This book was released on 2013-08-08 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why did the banana go to the doctors? Because he wasn't peeling very well! Proving the age-old maxim that ‘it’s in the way that you tell them’, Dads – for the best part of forever – have always been renowned for being truly god-awful joke tellers. Whether it’s telling them at the wrong moment, misremembering the punchline or it just simply being one of those jokes that were terrible to begin with, Dads are an embarrassment to the whole family when it comes to trying to tell jokes. The VERY Embarrassing Book of Dad Jokes is full to the brim with jokes that only your dear old Dad would dare say – jokes that will make you groan, sigh ... and then probably make you groan again. Dads take great pleasure in these kinds of jokes and some of them are so rubbish they actually blossom into proper rib-ticklers – but don’t tell your dad that, it’ll only encourage him!
Download or read book A Daily Dose of Dad Jokes written by Taylor Calmus and published by Rockridge Press. This book was released on 2019-10-08 with total page 232 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A dad was washing his car with his son until the son said, "Dad, can you please just use a sponge?" Unleash the dadliest force known to man: dad jokes. A Daily Dose of Dad Jokes is packed with 365 jokes to make you groan--and then make you smile. Master jokesters Peter L. Harmon and Taylor Calmus (a.k.a. "Dude Dad") offer enough of their top-quality, best-worst puns, quips, one-liners, and made-up stories to last you an entire year. A Daily Dose of Dad Jokes includes: So bad, they're good--Nobody ever said dad jokes were good. Seriously, they're awful. That's what makes them awesome. Keep 'em coming--Day after day, drop new witticisms on anyone within hearing range: kids, spouses, colleagues, unsuspecting neighbors... Family friendly--These dad jokes are safe for the bar or breakfast table, so you can share them all--the good, the dad, and the ugly. Why hold back? Give your family and friends their daily dose of dad jokes!
Download or read book The Big Book of Dad Jokes written by Joe Kerz and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-04-19 with total page 389 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hundreds and Hundreds of Jokes that Will Drive Your Family Crazy Nothing is more hilarious for moms, sons, and daughters than the bad jokes dads tell. (Well, at least he thinks they're hilarious . . .) Have you ever noticed when you’re out to dinner and your dad takes it upon himself to antagonize your server with a lame joke? Has he ever made a pun that made everyone at a family gathering roll their eyes? Has he ever made a corny comment about things simply lying around the house? If you answered “yes” to any of the following, you’re not alone. Dad jokes are at the center of all dad interactions and the core of every dad’s persona. This comedic compendium compiles more than eight hundred of the best jokes dads can use to hone their craft and ensure maximum eye rolling. Included within are jokes such as: Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food; no atmosphere. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant. What kind of tea is hard to swallow? Reality. With Dad Jokes, give your dad the gift of becoming the least funny/most "punny" guy in the room.
Download or read book The World s Greatest Dad Jokes The Complete Collection The Heirloom Edition written by Editors of Cider Mill Press, and published by Cider Mill Press. This book was released on 2024-06-11 with total page 287 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Why do melons have weddings? Because they cantaloupe! Because the world needs more dad jokes. Hundreds more. What are dad jokes? Short, family-friendly one-liners that often produce more eye rolls and groans from their audience than audible laughs. Anyone can tell dad jokes, but they are best told by dads. The World’s Greatest Dad Jokes: The Complete Collection is here, and inside you'll find: More puns, quips, and corny one-liners that are sure to get eyes rolling Hundreds of dad jokes that will make you groan—then make you smile. This book is jam-packed with clever quips and unbearable wisecracks that are so bad, they’re good. Now the dad joke aficionado in your life will never run out of puns, no matter how much you might want them to. The perfect gift for the dad who thinks he’s heard them all, this book is sure to add even more jokes to his repertoire, for better or worse. These jokes are so funny you won't even see them coming!
Download or read book All New Dad Jokes written by Dad Says Jokes and published by Cassell. This book was released on 2019-09-05 with total page 272 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: THE BRAND-NEW BOOK FROM @DADSAYSJOKES hr All New Dad Jokes is the second book from the most followed dad jokes page on Instagram, @DadSaysJokes. Now with a following of over 1 million, All New Dad Jokes provides brand new gags guaranteed to leave your friends and family laughing and groaning in equal measure. @DadSaysJokes is a community-run Instagram account with more than a million followers, inspired by the daily jokes of author Kit Chilvers' dad, Andrew. Every day, followers submit their jokes and the team picks their favourites - or Dad just drops in his own zinger! Kit, a young social networking mastermind started his career at the tender age of 14, when he created his original platform, Football.Newz, to serve audiences for the World cup 2014. He has recently added another nine platforms in different genres (of which @DadSaysJokes is one), with nine million followers and rising. This is his second book. Q: Where do naughty rainbows go? A: Prism.
Download or read book The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes written by Jeremy Brown and published by Media Lab Books. This book was released on 2021-04-13 with total page 176 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From giving as good as he got at the Harvard Lampoon to his comedic work in such films and TV shows as Donovan’s Reef, North to Alaska, Rowan & Martin’s Laugh-In, I Love Lucy, Dean Martin Celebrity Roast and The Red Skelton Hour, John Wayne was never shy about exhibiting his wry, knowing sense of humor. It’s this facet of Duke that The Official John Wayne Big Book of Dad Jokes captures. A father of six children himself, Duke was no stranger to making kids crack up (or at least trying to). This book presents those stories of Duke as practical joker as well as willing victim, embedded within more than 400 clever, yet dreadful jokes, stories, riddles and puns, perfect for family members of every age. Some of the jokes are Duke- and Western-themed, but most are simply good, original Dad jokes: some good, some bad, some awful, but all funny. Readers will also find inside nearly three dozen fun photos of Duke exhibiting his good humor for all to see, laughing with his kids or fellow actors on set and behind the scenes, making this book a treasure for fans and fathers alike.
Download or read book My Dad s Jokes Are Very Terribly Awfully Painfully Bad written by Jacob Eckeberger and published by . This book was released on 2021-05-21 with total page 26 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A book inspired by Dad Jokes and the families who put up with them (but secretly love them, too).
Download or read book Dad Jokes written by Joke Books for Kids and published by Joke Books for Kids. This book was released on 2018-05-29 with total page 48 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This Father's Day, give Dad a taste of his own bad medicine with Dad Jokes, the joke book you'll hate to love! Over 100 hilarious knock knock jokes, puns, and silly punchlines about all of Dad's favorite things will have the whole family laughing. Q: What did the daddy volcano say to his son? A: I lava you. Q: What does the Sourdough daddy do at night? A: Tells breadtime stories.
Download or read book Dad Joke Novel written by The Dad and published by . This book was released on 2019-11-11 with total page 175 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: My wife said, "Why don't you stop telling terrible Dad Jokes and write a book instead?" Thank you dear, for such a novel idea! Introducing, The Dad Joke Novel! 500 of Dad's most favourite Dad Jokes. Dads are able to make you laugh and groan at the same time with a badly timed joke. Give Dad the ultimate upgrade to his collection of hilariously awful puns with the Dad Joke Novel. The Dad Joke Novel is often compared to the book on anti-gravity... you can't put it down. Caution: This book left me with an awful headache after it fell on my head. But I only have my shelf to blame.
Download or read book The Big Book of Dad Jokes written by and published by Devela Publishing. This book was released on 2020-05-14 with total page 104 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 300 family-friendly jokes to make your dad's day. He'll love these terrible rib-ticklers - specially selected by a panel of the funniest fathers.
Download or read book Super Dad Jokes written by Jimmy Niro and published by Sourcebooks. This book was released on 2019 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The ultimate gift for Father's Day and Christmas Q: What super power do you get when you become a parent? A: Supervision. In a world of annoyed eye rolls and embarrassed head shakes, super dads rise as the unsung heroes of delightfully cringe-worthy humor. Super Dad Jokes embraces this power in an all-new edition filled with over 500 magnificent puns, stories, and anti-jokes. So arm yourself against the forces of evil and good taste with this heroically funny joke book--and save the world Includes knee-slappers like: I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm slowly getting over it. Q: What is the sleepiest fruit? A: Napricot. "Dad, do you want a box for your leftovers?" "No, but I'll wrestle you for them "
Download or read book Exceptionally Bad Dad Jokes written by Spiffy McChappy and published by . This book was released on 2019-05-23 with total page 105 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The perfect gift for any Dad who loves telling jokes and making everyone laugh! (cough cough) A fantastic novelty gift for Fathers day, Birthdays & Christmas. Clean family friendly jokes. The first page has space for you to write a special message, an ideal alternative to a card. Please note this book is not a joke book about Dads. It is a joke book full of Dad jokes. A Dad joke can best be described as an embarrassingly bad joke. Often demonstrated during special occasions & makes the family wince. This book will be a jolly old laugh for your old chap, but not so much for you. Please also note: No refunds will be given due to any embarrassment this book will cause you or if your eyes get sore from constant eye rolls.