Download or read book Cheers My Arse written by Ricky Tomlinson and published by Sphere. This book was released on 2007-10-04 with total page 262 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Ricky Tomlinson, author and entertainer, has worked in pubs and clubs up and down the country and seen more than his fair share of last orders. CHEERS . . . MY ARSE! is his hilarious collection of classic tales from the heart of publand. Featuring riotous stories that celebrate our best-loved hell raisers - Richard Harris, Peter O'Toole, Oliver Reid and Richard Burton, to name a few - and the escapades of modern-day drinking heroes (like the Gallagher brothers and Johnny Vegas), this is the perfect book for anyone who's ever had one too many . . .

Download or read book The Asshole Survival Guide written by Robert I. Sutton and published by HarperCollins. This book was released on 2017-09-12 with total page 229 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “This book is a contemporary classic—a shrewd and spirited guide to protecting ourselves from the jerks, bullies, tyrants, and trolls who seek to demean. We desperately need this antidote to the a-holes in our midst.”—Daniel H. Pink, best-selling author of To Sell Is Human and Drive How to avoid, outwit, and disarm assholes, from the author of the classic The No Asshole Rule As entertaining as it is useful, The Asshole Survival Guide delivers a cogent and methodical game plan for anybody who feels plagued by assholes. Sutton starts with diagnosis—what kind of asshole problem, exactly, are you dealing with? From there, he provides field-tested, evidence-based, and often surprising strategies for dealing with assholes—avoiding them, outwitting them, disarming them, sending them packing, and developing protective psychological armor. Sutton even teaches readers how to look inward to stifle their own inner jackass. Ultimately, this survival guide is about developing an outlook and personal plan that will help you preserve the sanity in your work life, and rescue all those perfectly good days from being ruined by some jerk. “Thought-provoking and often hilarious . . . An indispensable resource.”—Gretchen Rubin, best-selling author of The Happiness Project and Better Than Before “At last . . . clear steps for rejecting, deflecting, and deflating the jerks who blight our lives . . . Useful, evidence-based, and fun to read.”—Robert Cialdini, best-selling author of Influence and Pre-Suasion

Download or read book Cheer Up Mate written by Alan Weeks and published by The History Press. This book was released on 2011-10-03 with total page 243 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Cheer Up, Mate! is a compilation of comical tales and anecdotes from World War Two. Between 1939 and 1945 the world witnessed what is generally agreed to be the most horrific war in history. Millions died and millions more were physically or psychologically wounded by the conflict. Yet amidst the pain and devastation, people were not only able to survive, they also managed to maintain a sense of humour. For some, it was precisely this ability to laugh at their misfortunes (and those of the other side) that enabled them to solider on. This was especially true of the British, a nation whose reaction to more or less anything, up to and including someone’s house being bombed to rubble, tended to be, ‘never mind, have a cup of tea’. In this collection of stories, which covers the armed forces and civilians from both sides, Alan Weeks demonstrates how humour can survive even in the most unlikely of circumstances.

Download or read book Sit Down and Cheer written by Martin Kelner and published by A&C Black. This book was released on 2012-09-27 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Television and sport is the ultimate marriage of convenience. The two circled each other warily for a while - sport anxious the sofa-bound might spurn the live product, TV reluctant in a limited channel world to hand over too much screen time to flannelled fools and muddied oafs. But they got together, and stayed together, for the sake of the money, and now you cannot imagine one without the other. They are indivisible, like an old couple sitting in a teashop finishing each other's sentences, and there is little doubt which is the dominant partner. You have only to think of the recent sports stars who have left their muddy fields to don sequins, grab partners and tango their way across the stage in ultimate Saturday night television style, to see how far the two have come on their journey together. In Sit Down and Cheer Martin Kelner traces the development of this relationship from its humble origins in the 1960 Olympics, by way of the first-ever Match of the Day in 1964, through to the financial impact of Sky, right up to the high-tech gadgetry of our present-day viewing. Insightful and very funny, this is an entertaining exploration of two major national pastimes and not to be missed.

Download or read book The Yankee Yorkshireman written by Mary H. Blewett and published by University of Illinois Press. This book was released on 2009 with total page 234 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This study is a textual and contextual appraisal of the writings of Yorkshire-born Hedley Smith (1909-94) whose depiction of the fictional mill village of Briardale, Rhode Island, captures an early twentieth-century labor diaspora peopled with textile workers. Enraged and embittered at the transformatory experience of his own emigration, Smith used fiction to explore Yorkshire immigrants' culture and stubborn refusal to assimilate, their vital sexuality, and their vivid social customs. As Smith's writings reveal, emigration involves grief and anger, often universally concealed and problematic. Adopting a transnational perspective, Mary H. Blewett links Smith's fictional community to empirical data on the substance of working-class lives both in Yorkshire and in New England's worsted textile industries.

Download or read book Famous Anus written by Jordan Power and published by Cole James Books . This book was released on 2020-06-18 with total page 261 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the co-host of the wildly popular gay podcast, Shame On You, comes a hilarious, honest, and sometimes raunchy memoir documenting a decade-long descent into chaos. When Jordan Power checks himself into a mental hospital in the midst of a breakdown, he walks away without answers or prescription drugs — not for lack of asking. Gay, twenty-three, and newly single in downtown Toronto, Power can’t get out of his own way as he begins the journey of trying to figure out the world and himself, one self-destructive step at a time. Power’s unfiltered and humorous account of his path toward growing up and finding love is full of wild tales including run-ins with exes while on LSD, sleeping with his boss, blacking out in Rio, and of course, reconstructive asshole surgery. Acid-tongued Power’s debut novel Famous Anus is a how-not-to guide, showing that even lacking the most basic coping mechanisms, if you’re able to find humor in everything, life — like assholes — can eventually be put back together.

Download or read book The Day My Butt Went Psycho written by Andy Griffiths and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2016-11-29 with total page 228 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A young boy embarks on an epic journey across the land to reclaim his runaway butt in this hilarious beginning to a bestselling trilogy. Zack Freeman is ready to tell his story . . . the story of a brave young boy and his crazy runaway butt. The story of a crack butt-fighting unit called the B-team, a legendary Butt Hunter’s formidable daughter, and some of the ugliest and meanest butts ever to roam the face of the Earth. A story of endurance that takes Zack on an epic journey across the Great Windy Desert, through the Brown Forest, and over the Sea of Butts before descending into the heart of an explosive buttcano to confront the biggest, ugliest, and meanest butt of them all! Praise for The Day My Butt Went Psycho “Griffith’s fun gross-out adventure novel follows Zack Freeman, who awakens to see his rear end leaping out the window to lead a bum rally . . . Young readers will likely get a kick out of it all (there’s even a glossary included).” —Publishers Weekly

Download or read book Torn written by Vivian Lux and published by LuxLife Publishing. This book was released on with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Lead singer Hudson is finally living his rock and roll dreams. Will he throw them all away for a chance with his bandmate’s little sister? Find out in this emotional and steamy rockstar romance! I stumbled into rock stardom and it's given me everything I ever wanted. Except her. My bandmate's little sister. She's off limits. I know this. But I can't stay away. When I laid her lush body beneath mine, we both swore this was the last time. I had no idea it was also her first. Tallula: My brother knows something is up. We have to watch our step. We have to be careful. We have to stop taking these crazy risks. One wrong move and we lose everything. One single slip up and it's the end of Wreckage... forever. p.p1 {margin: 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px 0.0px; text-indent: 28.8px; font: 12.0px 'Times New Roman'}

Download or read book I Just Wanna Ride Ftw written by Robert R. Kopp and published by BLACK OAK MEDIA INC. This book was released on 2011-12 with total page 164 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: He went looking for faith but couldn't find it in the church... It's raw, rough, real, and maybe even redemptive; and he could lose his day job for writing about it! I Just Wanna Ride is an Ivy League pastor's search for authentic faith on a motorcycle after he couldn't find it after years in academics, pulpits, or pews. From his immersion into biker culture since watching Easy Rider as a teenager, the author holds no punches in this provocative, edgy, and risky look at hogs and those who ride 'em as a metaphor and challenge to believers and bikers. Too authentic for "church ladies" and too concerned about "faith" for secularists, this book demands reading by all of 'em if any of 'em still care about Who and what matter most sooner or later and definitely in the end.

Download or read book Dead Point written by Peter Temple and published by Text Publishing. This book was released on 2014-02-26 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Winner, Ned Kelly Award, Best Crime Novel, 2000 It takes a lot to rattle Jack Irish but, as Melbourne descends into a cold, wet winter, his mood is on the same trajectory. The woman in Jack's life has reconnected with an old flame. He has gambled and lost massively and seen a champion horse put down. It's not surprising that Jack's mind is not fully on the job he's being paid to do: find Robbie Colburne, occasional barman. But when Jack does get serious, he finds the freelance drink-dispenser is of great interest to some powerful people, people with very bad habits and a distinct lack of respect for the criminal justice system...Any lapse in concentration could prove fatal. Peter Temple is the author of nine novels, including four books in the Jack Irish series. He has won the Ned Kelly Award for Crime Fiction five times, and his widely acclaimed novels have been published in over twenty countries. The Broken Shore won the UK's prestigious Duncan Lawrie Dagger for the best crime novel of 2007 and Truth won the 2010 Miles Franklin Literary Award, the first time a crime writer has won an award of this calibre anywhere in the world. Temple's first two novels Bad Debts and Black Tide have been made into films with Guy Pearce starring as Jack Irish. They screened on the ABC in August, 2012. 'Another world-class crime novel from Peter Temple.' Canberra Times 'Temple writes...with enough insight and passion to make the reader ask exactly where the boundary lies between genre fiction and serious literary fiction.' Sydney Morning Herald 'Temple is as dark and mean, as cool and as mesmerising, as any James Ellroy or Elmore Leonard with whom you might kill the small or sad hours.' Peter Craven, Age 'Temple's work is spare, deeply ironic; his wit, like the local beer, as cold as a dental anaesthetic.' Graeme Blundell, Australian 'It's clever, funny, exciting and exceedingly well written. The author weaves multi layers of plot, life, characters and emotions into an exceedingly satisfying narrative that grips from first to last page. If you haven't yet discovered Temple, track down his books. He's premier class.' Daily Examiner UK

Download or read book Sex Drugs and Football Thugs written by Mark Chester and published by eBook Partnership. This book was released on 2011-09-06 with total page 335 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: What does a football hooligan do outside football? In the case of Mark Chester, the answer was: live off his wits and burn the candle at both ends. Sex, Drugs And Football Thugs is part travelogue, part confessional, and by turns harrowing and hilarious.

Download or read book Comical Vacations Book 2 written by Maureen Reil and published by Maureen Reil. This book was released on 2017-01-21 with total page 446 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Comical Vacations 2 Three-Book Bundle Contents The Finch Family Holiday 3 It is that time of year again folks, yes summer is here so batten down the hatches because the Finch family are heading for Cornwall to stay in a holiday home by the sea with its own secluded beach. Sounds idyllic, sounds relaxing and sounds like a lot of fun in the sun so one out of three is not bad since all is not what it seems and how is Kitty Finch supposed to chill out when there are certain people winding her up from start to finish. As extra members of the clan are joining them for the ten-day humorous adventure, sparks could fly if someone lit a match to ignite the tension, sexual or otherwise. There are days out to look forward to in Cornwall where the Finch family discover new things, try out new stuff and resort to old tricks when needed. Will Kitty’s cousin get the better of her on this comical vacation? Will Kitty Finch be involved in any holiday romances or just watching from the sidelines, as per usual? Will a cardboard figure and a knitted scarecrow survive the vacation to go on another one? So come along and catch up with the funny Finches as they show you what having a British family holiday is about. The Finch Family Holiday 4 This year’s Finch family holiday finds them flying off to France for ten days in the rural French countryside. Only Kitty Finch seems to spend her vacation time searching for something whether it is a home for a pet, a handbag or a holiday romance. Not to mention the mystery man and his yellow socks that bring trouble her way. All whilst avoiding the unwanted advances of a certain somebody who does not know when to take no for an answer but should know better. As the Finch family comes across plenty of people to share their time with including German neighbours, English expats and even a French farmer to name a few. One of the men Kitty meets is special enough to take her fancy for a French fling, so start reading this funny French farce to see if she succeeds despite the exes who are hijacking her holiday fun. Whether it comes to randy rabbits, randy monkeys or randy men it is all part of the experience. The Finch Family Holiday 5 Who wants to go on holiday when they are ill in bed? Kitty Finch does not so she does her best to get out of the annual family holiday but no, her parents are having none of it so she is going to Turkey whether she likes it or not. Since they will probably kidnap her if she does not comply and come willingly while she never imagined part of that sentence actually coming true on this trip. Anyway, they are soon off to the airport where her nightmares begin and not for the only time on this holiday does Kitty wish that she had stayed in bed and had not bothered getting up. Not that she wants to appear ungrateful about going on a five-day all-inclusive package holiday in the sun during the school half-term in October, it is just that she will be face-to-face with her ex-husband who she hasn't seen since the wedding fiasco and the less said about that the better. Despite not feeling up to a holiday with the family, it is not all doom and gloom for poor old Kitty because she does get to experience things in Turkey that she never would have had she not gone there and some aspects of it she even enjoys. As this is what a British family holidaying abroad gets up to when left to their own devices. Only do not expect this laugh-out-loud saga to end there because the funny Finches will be back for yet more shenanigans in the next book.

Download or read book Scratch written by Danny Gillan and published by Jakobian Books. This book was released on 2014-01-19 with total page 211 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An unexpected reminder of his past prompts Jim Cooper, a 33 year-old Glaswegian call centre worker, to make a big decision. He’s going back to adulthood ground-zero - no job, no debt, no, er, home, and starting again. Maybe this time he can do it right and get the girl. The fact that the girl is already married and living in another country and her Bruce Lee obsessed dad apparently wants to turn Jim into his latest pet are only two of the obstacles he faces. Given Jim's forward planning skills don’t extend beyond praying and having panic attacks, it isn’t surprising that he soon finds himself living with his parents and working for minimum wage, in the same pub he worked in when he was 18. What is unexpected is Paula Fraser walking through the pub’s door for the first time in 12 years. What’s even more surprising is that Paula admits she still loves Jim. But yes, she’s married, and no, she won't cheat on her husband. She'll tell him the marriage is over. Soon. When the time is right. As soon as her husband's sick grandfather gets better - or fatally worse. And so, Jim and Paula embark on the tricky business of not having an affair, and not telling anyone they know that they’re not having an affair. As Jim reflects, ‘If not being physically intimate with her in any way and denying to everyone we knew that anything was going on between us was the best way to prove I loved her, then that’s what I would do.’ Scratch is an un-sanitised, emotionally honest and hilariously candid story about what it is to grow up as opposed to simply change age, as told by a man who doesn’t know what any of those words mean. Word Count: 98,000 By the same author: Will You Love Me Tomorrow - some musicians wait a lifetime for a record deal. Bryan Rivers waited three days longer. Will You Love Me Tomorrow is a comedy about death, depression, grief, loss, friendship, family, haircuts and the music business. A Selection of Meats and Cheeses - Twelve short stories from Danny Gillan. Some sad, some funny, some serious some silly, some poignant and some pointless.

Download or read book A Pig of Cold Poison written by Pat McIntosh and published by Soho Press. This book was released on 2010 with total page 245 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Although he was watching closely when the mummer was poisoned, it took Gil Cunningham several days and three more poisonings to work out how it was done. Danny Gibson and Nanty Bothwell, rivals for the affections of Agnes Renfrew, the apothecary's pretty daughter, are also good friends. When they both take part in the festive play at the house of Gil's sister Kate, it ends in Danny's death, apparently by poison from his friend's flask. So was it deliberate, and if not, why won't Nanty defend himself? Why is Agnes' eccentric brother Nicol so insistent that Nanty had the wrong flask, and why do none of the apothecaries in Glasgow recognize the poison it held? Gil, convinced Nanty is innocent, sets out to answer these questions and finds himself enmeshed in the tensions of the Renfrew household and the tangled relationships among the apothecary houses. And then a second and third death confuse matters further still, and bring Gil's wife Alys into the investigation. Praise for Pat McIntosh: McIntosh's characterisations and period detail are first rate . (Publishers Weekly). The next Cunningham adventure is to be welcomed . (Historical Novels Review). Will do for Glasgow in the 15th century what Ellis Peters and her Brother Cadfael did for Shrewsbury in the 12th . (Mystery Readers Journal). Lots of dramatic characterisation and detail on medieval Glasgow . (Glasgow Herald). McIntosh does a solid job of blending plot and period detail . (Publishers Weekly, starred review).

Download or read book Ulysses written by James Joyce and published by Standard Ebooks. This book was released on 2024-05-28T04:49:30Z with total page 576 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: James Joyce’s most celebrated novel, and one of the most highly-regarded novels in the English language, records the events of one day—Thursday the 16th of June, 1904—in the city of Dublin. The reader is first reintroduced to Stephen Dedalus, the protagonist of Joyce’s previous novel A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. Stephen is now living in a rented Martello tower and working at a school, having completed his B.A. and a period of attempted further study in Paris. The focus then shifts to the book’s protagonist, Leopold Bloom, an advertising canvasser and social outsider. It is a work day, so both Bloom and Stephen depart their homes for their respective journeys around Dublin. While containing a richly detailed story and still being generally described as a novel, Ulysses breaks many of the bounds otherwise associated with the form. It consists of eighteen chapters, or “episodes,” each somehow echoing a scene in Homer’s Odyssey. Each episode takes place in a different setting, and each is written in a different, and often unusual, style. The book’s chief innovation is commonly cited to be its expansion of the “free indirect discourse” or “interior monologue” technique that Joyce used in his previous two books. Ulysses is known not only for its formal novelty and linguistic inventiveness, but for its storied publication history. The first fourteen episodes of the book were serialized between 1918 and 1920 in The Little Review, while several episodes were published in 1919 in The Egoist. In 1921, the New York Society for the Suppression of Vice won a trial regarding obscenity in the thirteenth episode, “Nausicaa.” The Little Review’s editors were enjoined against publishing any further installments; Ulysses would not appear again in America until 1934. The outcome of the 1921 trial worsened Joyce’s already-considerable difficulties in finding a publisher in England. After lamenting to Sylvia Beach, owner of the Parisian bookshop Shakespeare and Company, that it might never be published at all, Beach offered to publish it in Paris, and Ulysses first appeared in its entirety in February 1922. The first printing of the first edition was filled with printing errors. A corrected second edition was published in 1924. Stuart Gilbert’s 1932 edition benefited from correspondence with Joyce, and claimed in its front matter to be “the definitive standard edition,” but was later found to have introduced errors of its own. The novel’s initial reception was mixed. W. B. Yeats called it “mad,” but would later agree with the positive assessments of T. S. Eliot and Ezra Pound, stating that it was “indubitably a work of genius.” Joyce’s second biographer Richard Ellmann reports that one doctor claimed to have seen writing of equal merit by his insane patients, and Virginia Woolf derided it as “underbred.” Joyce’s aunt, Josephine Murray, rejected it as “unfit to read” on account of its purported obscenity, to which Joyce famously retorted that if that were so, then life was not fit to live. The sheer density of references in the text make Ulysses a book that virtually demands of the reader access to critical interpretation; but it also makes it a book that is easily obscured by the industry of scholarship it has generated over the last century. The dismissal of a serious interpretation is tempting, but would trivialize Joyce’s enormous project as an extended joke or an elaborate exercise in ego. Likewise dismissing it as uninterpretable would ignore the profusion of earnest critical analyses. Today Ulysses is considered by many to be the zenith of 20th century literature: both one of the richest, and also the most difficult, books to ever be written. To appreciate it is not to think it unintelligible; rather, perhaps the best description of it is the one used of Ulysses himself in a 21st century translation of Homer’s epic—“complicated.” This Standard Ebooks edition is based on a transcription of the 1922 Shakespeare and Company first edition, with emendations from pre-1929 errata lists and the second edition in its 1927 ninth printing by Shakespeare and Company. It does not track any one particular edition, but rather is a blend of pre-1929 editions that aims to contain what scholars might consider to be the most accurate version of what was printed before 1929. Therefore, various probable misprints have been retained that may have been corrected in post-1929 editions. Consultation of various editions of the book and the historical collation list appended to Hans Walter Gabler’s Critical and Synoptic Edition is advised before contacting Standard Ebooks about potential mistakes. This book is part of the Standard Ebooks project, which produces free public domain ebooks.

Download or read book Ulysses written by James Joyce and published by McClelland & Stewart. This book was released on 2022-01-04 with total page 709 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Loosely based on The Odyssey, this landmark of modern literature follows ordinary Dubliners in 1904. Capturing a single day in the life of Dubliner Leopold Bloom, his friends Buck Mulligan and Stephen Dedalus, his wife Molly, and a scintillating cast of supporting characters, Joyce pushes Celtic lyricism and vulgarity to splendid extremes. Captivating experimental techniques range from interior monologues to exuberant wordplay and earthy humor, resulting in a major achievement in twentieth-century literature. Penguin Random House Canada is proud to bring you classic works of literature in e-book form, with the highest quality production values. Find more today and rediscover books you never knew you loved.

Download or read book Ashes written by Matthew Crow and published by Legend Press Ltd. This book was released on 2010-08-11 with total page 186 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “Authentic and poetic, lyrical and believable . . . a raw, rip-roaring depiction of life” from the author of In Bloom and Another Place (Mark Piggott, author of the Forever Avalon series). A lawless land of violence and deprivation, The Meadow Well Estate is a no-go area for police and non-residents alike and a hotbed of ritual violence. No one dares enter of their own accord, and few make it out alive. But Jack was one of the good ones. Recently released from prison, he is determined to turn his life completely around: by getting out. When, however, rumors spark of the police’s involvement in the death of two young joy riders, the anxieties of the estate flare into a week-long riot, causing burnt out wrecks at every turn and capturing the attention of the local and national media. Can Jack resist the call of the indiscriminate fury, or will the desperation of Meadow Well claim him once more? Praise for Matthew Crow’s In Bloom “The Fault in Our Stars meets Adrian Mole. Moving, funny and brilliantly narrated.”—Metro “Wow. Read In Bloom right now. It will improve your life.”—Matt Haig, international bestselling author “A moving and wonderfully witty tale . . . This excellent book is worth anyone’s time.”—Daily Telegraph