Download or read book Captain Funny Pants Presents Clever Jokes for Clever Kids written by Aaron T. Arthur and published by Punchline Press. This book was released on 2018-12-07 with total page 102 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Captain Funny Pants Presents Clever Jokes for Clever Kids is great fun for all ages! This book has knock-knock jokes that will knock your socks off! Delight your friends with witty one-liners, and make those long road trips a blast. There are also great illustrations to keep your early readers engaged. Clever Jokes for Clever Kids is a collection of stellar jokes for kids of all ages that is sure to entertain. "Shaking hands with pirates is amazing. Try it once and you’ll be hooked!" -Captain Funny Pants Q: Do you know why horse-food stores are so bad at taking criticism? A: They hate getting any kind of feed back! Q: What do you call a steak that’s just returned from finishing school? A: Well seasoned! Punchline Press is dedicated to artisanal production of cleverness. We deliver only the finest jokes.
Download or read book Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants written by Dav Pilkey and published by Scholastic UK. This book was released on 2013-12-05 with total page 149 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Professor Pippy P. (Pee-Pee) Poopypants is a brilliant scientist, but his ridiculous name means no one takes his fantastic inventions seriously. And now he's on the rampage! He's armed with fiendish inventions Shrinky-Pig 2000 and the terrible Gerbil Jogger 2000. Can Captain Underpants stop him?
Download or read book Between the Lines written by Jodi Picoult and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-06-25 with total page 384 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Told in their separate voices, sixteen-year-old Prince Oliver, who wants to break free of his fairy-tale existence, and fifteen-year-old Delilah, a loner obsessed with Prince Oliver and the book in which he exists, work together to seek his freedom.
Download or read book Captain Underpants and the Invasion of the Incredibly Naughty Cafeteria Ladies from Outer Space written by Dav Pilkey and published by Scholastic UK. This book was released on 2013-12-05 with total page 134 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Harold and George's crazy creation is back — in an adventure that's WEDGIER than ever! He defeated Dr Nappy. He terminated the talking toilets. But is Captain Underpants ready for three massive, tentacled space aliens (in disguise)? Has he met his match in the Giant Man-Eating Dandelion of Doom...?
Download or read book Captain Underpants and the Revolting Revenge of the Radioactive Robo Boxers Color Edition Captain Underpants 10 written by Dav Pilkey and published by Scholastic Inc.. This book was released on 2020-09-01 with total page 214 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: George and Harold have to figure out how to fix history in the tenth book in this #1 New York Times bestselling series by Dav Pilkey, the author and illustrator of Dog Man! George and Harold have been turned into evil zombie nerds doomed to roam a devastated, postapocalyptic planet for all eternity! Unfortunately, the boys can't count on Captain Underpants for help because Tippy Tinkletrousers and his time-traveling hijinks prevented George and Harold from creating him in the first place! With Tippy having changed the course of human history forever, George and Harold will have to figure out a way to change it back!
Download or read book Pretty Good Joke Book written by Garrison Keillor and published by Blackstone Publishing. This book was released on 2021-08-10 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 2,200 Jokes from America’s favorite live radio show A treasury of hilarity from Garrison Keillor and the cast of public radio’s A Prairie Home Companion. A guy walks into a bar. Eight Canada Geese walk into a bar. A termite jumps up on the bar and asks, “Where is the bar tender?” Drum roll. The Sixth Edition of the perennially popular Pretty Good Joke Book is everything the first five were and more. More puns, one-liners, light bulb jokes, knock-knock jokes, and third-grader jokes (have you heard the one about Elvis Parsley?). More religion jokes, political jokes, lawyer jokes, blonde jokes, and jokes in questionable taste (Why did the urologist lose his license? He got in trouble with his peers). More jokes about chickens, relationships, and senior moments (the nice thing about Alzheimer’s is you can enjoy the same jokes again and again). It all started back in 1996, when A Prairie Home Companion fans laughed themselves silly during the first Joke Show. The broadcast was such a hit that it became an almost-annual gagfest. Then fans wanted to read the jokes, share them, and pass them around, and the first Pretty Good Joke Book was born. With over 200 new and updated jokes, the latest edition promises countless giggles, chortles, and guffaws anyone—fans of the radio show or not—will enjoy.
Download or read book Pun and Games written by Richard Lederer and published by Chicago Review Press. This book was released on 1996-06-01 with total page 78 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Introduces the wacky world of wordplay with puns, spoonerisms, games of word substitution, and more.
Download or read book Ask a Manager written by Alison Green and published by Ballantine Books. This book was released on 2018-05-01 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the creator of the popular website Ask a Manager and New York’s work-advice columnist comes a witty, practical guide to 200 difficult professional conversations—featuring all-new advice! There’s a reason Alison Green has been called “the Dear Abby of the work world.” Ten years as a workplace-advice columnist have taught her that people avoid awkward conversations in the office because they simply don’t know what to say. Thankfully, Green does—and in this incredibly helpful book, she tackles the tough discussions you may need to have during your career. You’ll learn what to say when • coworkers push their work on you—then take credit for it • you accidentally trash-talk someone in an email then hit “reply all” • you’re being micromanaged—or not being managed at all • you catch a colleague in a lie • your boss seems unhappy with your work • your cubemate’s loud speakerphone is making you homicidal • you got drunk at the holiday party Praise for Ask a Manager “A must-read for anyone who works . . . [Alison Green’s] advice boils down to the idea that you should be professional (even when others are not) and that communicating in a straightforward manner with candor and kindness will get you far, no matter where you work.”—Booklist (starred review) “The author’s friendly, warm, no-nonsense writing is a pleasure to read, and her advice can be widely applied to relationships in all areas of readers’ lives. Ideal for anyone new to the job market or new to management, or anyone hoping to improve their work experience.”—Library Journal (starred review) “I am a huge fan of Alison Green’s Ask a Manager column. This book is even better. It teaches us how to deal with many of the most vexing big and little problems in our workplaces—and to do so with grace, confidence, and a sense of humor.”—Robert Sutton, Stanford professor and author of The No Asshole Rule and The Asshole Survival Guide “Ask a Manager is the ultimate playbook for navigating the traditional workforce in a diplomatic but firm way.”—Erin Lowry, author of Broke Millennial: Stop Scraping By and Get Your Financial Life Together
Download or read book Bad Dad Jokes written by Willow Creek Press and published by . This book was released on 2018 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The dad joke is a delicate thing. Part knowing humor, part lack of humor, it's only requirement is that it elicits not a laugh from its audience but the annoyed response: "Daaaaaaaaad." Bad Dad Jokes is the biggest, baddest collection of "so bad they're actually good" jokes that are guaranteed to deliver a daily dose of groans and giggles. Bad Dad Jokes is a one of a kind collection of extraordinary humor in one book. By giving this collection as a gift you will bring humor and lasting memories to events for years to come.
Download or read book The All New Captain Underpants Extra Crunchy Book O Fun 2 written by Dav Pilkey and published by Captain Underpants. This book was released on 2003 with total page 95 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Join George Beard and Harold Hutchins for a wedgie-powered wonder! The All New Captain Underpants Extra-Crunchy Book O' Fun 2! Word-searches, mazes, quizzes, crosswords and truly disgusting jokes combine to make this a must for any fan of Captain Underpants and Super Diaper Baby! Have you read your Underpants today?
Download or read book Reader s Digest Fun Jokes for Funny Kids written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-07-02 with total page 96 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Where does a king keep his armies?... ...In his sleevies! Do you have a budding comedian on your hands? Loaded with Knock Knock jokes, riddles, one-liners, tongue twisters and puns, Fun Jokes for Funny Kids will give them hours of new material that will keep kids ages 6-12 rolling in laughter. Knock Knock jokes, riddles, tongue twisters and puns guaranteed to make your kids (and you) laugh out loud. Also includes illustrations and cartoons for extra giggles. Knock Knock. ...Who's there? Boo hoo! ...Boo hoo who? Aww, don't cry--it's just a joke! Knock Knock. ...Who's there? Olive. ...Olive who? Olive you and I don't care who knows it! What do you call an old snowman? ...Water! Which dinosaur knew the most words? ...The thesaurus! What do you call a fish with no eyes? ...fsh! What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator! How do turtles talk to each other? By using shell phones! Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed! Why did the spider go to the computer? To check his web site. Where do polar bears vote? The North Poll.
Download or read book How to Pee written by Todd Spector and published by . This book was released on 2016 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "Family physician Dr. Todd Spector presents a fresh and outrageously fun way to encourage little girls to give up their diapers. They can try it free air style (in the backyard!), or use the potty with the help of a few props and plenty of imagination. Peeing in the potty is a lot more fun if you do it princess style, dance-party style, or gymnast style!" -- back cover.
Download or read book Knock Knock Jokes for Kids Laugh Out Loud Jokes for Kids written by Rob Elliott and published by Baker Books. This book was released on 2013-06-15 with total page 126 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Kids can't get enough of laughter--so they can't get enough of Rob Elliot's hilarious joke books! Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids is an all-new collection of knock-knock jokes that will have kids and kids-at-heart rolling in the aisles. Jokes like Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben away for a while but I'm back now With more than 2 million copies sold of his first book, Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids, it's clear that kids (and their adults) are looking for clean, lighthearted humor--and Rob Elliott delivers.
Download or read book Blindsight written by Peter Watts and published by Macmillan. This book was released on 2006-10-03 with total page 388 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hugo and Shirley Jackson award-winning Peter Watts stands on the cutting edge of hard SF with his acclaimed novel, Blindsight Two months since the stars fell... Two months of silence, while a world held its breath. Now some half-derelict space probe, sparking fitfully past Neptune's orbit, hears a whisper from the edge of the solar system: a faint signal sweeping the cosmos like a lighthouse beam. Whatever's out there isn't talking to us. It's talking to some distant star, perhaps. Or perhaps to something closer, something en route. So who do you send to force introductions with unknown and unknowable alien intellect that doesn't wish to be met? You send a linguist with multiple personalities, her brain surgically partitioned into separate, sentient processing cores. You send a biologist so radically interfaced with machinery that he sees x-rays and tastes ultrasound. You send a pacifist warrior in the faint hope she won't be needed. You send a monster to command them all, an extinct hominid predator once called vampire, recalled from the grave with the voodoo of recombinant genetics and the blood of sociopaths. And you send a synthesist—an informational topologist with half his mind gone—as an interface between here and there. Pray they can be trusted with the fate of a world. They may be more alien than the thing they've been sent to find. At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.
Download or read book In Fifty Years We ll All Be Chicks written by Adam Carolla and published by Crown. This book was released on 2011-05-17 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A couple years back, I was at the Phoenix airport bar. It was empty except for one heavy-set, gray bearded, grizzled guy who looked like he just rode his donkey into town after a long day of panning for silver in them thar hills. He ordered a Jack Daniels straight up, and that's when I overheard the young guy with the earring behind the bar asking him if he had ID. At first the old sea captain just laughed. But the guy with the twinkle in his ear asked again. At this point it became apparent that he was serious. Dan Haggerty's dad fired back, "You've got to be kidding me, son." The bartender replied, "New policy. Everyone has to show their ID." Then I watched Burl Ives reluctantly reach into his dungarees and pull out his military identification card from World War II. It's a sad and eerie harbinger of our times that the Oprah-watching, crystal-rubbing, Whole Foods-shopping moms and their whipped attorney husbands have taken the ability to reason away from the poor schlub who makes the Bloody Marys. What we used to settle with common sense or a fist, we now settle with hand sanitizer and lawyers. Adam Carolla has had enough of this insanity and he's here to help us get our collective balls back. In Fifty Years We'll All Be Chicks is Adam's comedic gospel of modern America. He rips into the absurdity of the culture that demonized the peanut butter and jelly sandwich, turned the nation's bathrooms into a lawless free-for-all of urine and fecal matter, and put its citizens at the mercy of a bunch of minimum wagers with axes to grind. Peppered between complaints Carolla shares candid anecdotes from his day to day life as well as his past—Sunday football at Jimmy Kimmel's house, his attempts to raise his kids in a society that he mostly disagrees with, his big showbiz break, and much, much more. Brilliantly showcasing Adam's spot-on sense of humor, this book cements his status as a cultural commentator/comedian/complainer extraordinaire.
Download or read book Monsters Love Underpants written by Claire Freedman and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2015-05-05 with total page 32 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Underpants are monstrously funny in this playful picture book from the team that brought you Dinosaurs Love Underpants and Pirates Love Underpants. Monsters think it’s MONSTER fun, To creep around, all scary! But there’s something they love even MORE, Than looking mean and hairy! Monsters around the world have different ways to scare, but they all share a love for zany underpants! Every Saturday night, you will find them in a secret cave, showing off their pants as they dance the Monster Bop—but they have to make it home before the sun comes up. After all, who would be scared of monsters in pants that were stripped and dotted?
Download or read book Treasure Island written by Robert Louis Stevenson and published by . This book was released on 1918 with total page 362 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
