Download or read book Baboon Fart Story written by Phronk and published by Lulu.com. This book was released on 2014-02-21 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In a 2014 blog post by author Chuck Wendig, he addressed the truism that self publishing is the only real choice for authors today: "I can literally write the word 'fart' 100,000 times and slap a cover of [a] baboon urinating into his own mouth, then upload that cool motherfucker right to Amazon. Nobody would stop me. Whereas, at the Kept Gates, a dozen editors and agents would slap my Baboon Fart Story to the ground like an errant badminton birdie." Should we just take Chuck's word for it? Of course not. His hypothesis, like any other, needs to be put to the test. Science, bitch. Can one simply walk into self-publishing like a damn hobbit? This book is the word "fart" written 100 000 times. You are literally about to buy the word ""fart,"" written over and over. There is a picture of a baboon drinking piss on the cover for some reason, but other than that, it's a whole lot of ""fart."" It's also a biting critique of quality control in self-publishing or something.
Download or read book Does It Fart written by Nick Caruso and published by Hachette UK. This book was released on 2019-07-11 with total page 48 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: An explosive and hilarious look at facts, farts, and fun! Dogs fart. Cats fart. Horses fart (a lot). But what about snakes? Spiders? Octopuses? What about chimpanzees? Cheetahs? Or dinosaurs? In this gaseous guide to kids' favourite animals (and some they've probably never heard of), young readers will discover not only which animals parp, but also which have the stinkiest farts, which fart the most, and where all this smelly stuff comes from. They'll even learn which species has its own secret fart code! Perfect for reluctant readers, and with full-colour illustrations throughout, Does It Fart? is the funniest book you never knew you needed. Based on the New York Times bestseller Does It Fart?: The Definitive Field Guide to Animal Flatulence.
Download or read book Yesu s Baboon written by Gerhard Venter and published by Gerhard Venter. This book was released on 2022-01-01 with total page 485 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The judgment of Koyati, a poor herdboy from a remote village in Tanzania, is often clouded, as if he were a crocodile lurking under muddy waters. He would rather be quick and clear-eyed like Rabbit. He goes to the city and soon lands in prison. A parole officer calls him a baboon. Insulted to the core, Koyati starts incorporating a baboon in his woodcarving. On death row he discovers that he has world-class talent. Can his strange art save him?
Download or read book Monkey Tales and Other Short Stories written by Mahmoud Hirji and published by FriesenPress. This book was released on 2022-07-20 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Monkey Tales and other Short Stories is a collection of 14 short stories based on the author’s life growing up in East Africa, his global travels, experiences working in Canada and abroad, and more. Hirji deftly blurs the boundaries between memoir and fiction, creating vivid characters such as Aziz, who stars prominently in many stories, along with nefarious biker and monkey gangs, a gruesome toilet cleaner, a beautiful haunted spirit, endearing old women, sexy girlfriends, nudes and others who leap off the pages in their largesse. Stories come to life with Hirji’s vivid prose: you can practically smell the puri bubbling in oil and feel the victim’s terror when he takes on an unlikely intruder in a riotous showdown. Although Monkey Tales teases out humour and suspense in its stories, there’s plenty of poignancy in the collection, too. Whether facing financial hardship or racial bias, the characters demonstrate resilience and good nature as they struggle for survival between both humankind and the animal kingdom. This book is registered with the US Copyright Office
Download or read book The Arborist written by P. T. Phronk and published by . This book was released on 2016-10-02 with total page 126 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The tree wasn't there last night. Wes's perfect little family doesn't appreciate nature like he does, and they don't seem to care that their own back yard has become a site of unearthly mystery.But Wes cares. He needs to know what it is, and where it came from, because this is no ordinary tree. It's growing far too quickly.Then there's the concerning matter of the entity that the tree attracts in the middle of the night ...P.T. Phronk presents a short novel of quiet horror that will make you rethink the things growing just outside your door.
Download or read book You Can Do Anything Magic Skeleton written by Chuck Wendig and published by Rizzoli Publications. This book was released on 2021-04-13 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: In the tradition of inspirational pick-me-ups like Lin-Manuel Miranda and Johnny Sun's G'Morning, G'Night but with a Calvin & Hobbesian sensibility comes this whimsically nerdy spin, illustrated by Natalie Metzger, on motivating folks into getting creative and "DOING THE THINGS." For several years, Chuck has crafted hilarious and inspirational thoughts of the day--they might begin with an optimistic salvo, but inevitably and mirthfully detour into the demon-summoning, robot-making, or confirming that humans are actually mythical hybrid creatures. Equal parts inspiring, sweet, and very funny, Wendig's profane and imaginative galvanizing quips in You Can Do Anything, Magic Skeleton! are sure to amp up readers and motivate them to get things done.
Download or read book Bug Week written by Airini Beautrais and published by Victoria University Press. This book was released on 2021-02-23 with total page 136 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A science educator in domestic chaos fetishises Scandinavian furniture and champagne flutes. A group of white-collar deadbeats attend a swinger's party in the era of drunk Muldoon. A pervasive smell seeps through the walls of a German housing block. A seabird performs at an open-mic night.Bug Week is a scalpel-clean examination of male entitlement, a dissection of death, an agar plate of mundanity. From 1960s Wellington to post-Communist Germany, Bug Week traverses the weird, the wry and the grotesque in a story collection of human taxonomy.
Download or read book Rise of the Spider Goddess written by Jim C. Hines and published by Jim C. Hines. This book was released on 2014-12-02 with total page 200 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:
Download or read book Doodle Adventures The Search for the Slimy Space Slugs written by Mike Lowery and published by Workman Publishing. This book was released on 2016-05-17 with total page 113 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Draw your way through the story! Doodle Adventures: The Search for the Slimy Space Slugs! is a lighthearted fantasy where the reader first draws him- or herself into the story, and then continues by following prompts and adding more illustrations and doodles. Set in space, the book invites the reader to join Carl, a duck and member of a super-secret international group of explorers, on a journey in search of a very important grail-like object. The book is sturdy paper over board with beautiful cream paper—perfect for defacing! And by the end, the reader will have co-written a tale to return to again and again, and show off to family and friends.
Download or read book They Poured Fire on Us From the Sky written by Benjamin Ajak and published by PublicAffairs. This book was released on 2015-08-11 with total page 353 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: The inspiring story of three young Sudanese boys who were driven from their homes by civil war and began an epic odyssey of survival, facing life-threatening perils, ultimately finding their way to a new life in America. Between 1987 and 1989, Alepho, Benjamin, and Benson, like tens of thousands of young boys, took flight from the massacres of Sudan's civil war. They became known as the Lost Boys. With little more than the clothes on their backs, sometimes not even that, they streamed out over Sudan in search of refuge. Their journey led them first to Ethiopia and then, driven back into Sudan, toward Kenya. They walked nearly one thousand miles, sustained only by the sheer will to live. They Poured Fire on Us from the Sky is the three boys' account of that unimaginable journey. With the candor and the purity of their child's-eye-vision, Alephonsian, Benjamin, and Benson recall by turns: how they endured the hunger and strength-sapping illnesses-dysentery, malaria, and yellow fever; how they dodged the life-threatening predators-lions, snakes, crocodiles and soldiers alike-that dogged their footsteps; and how they grappled with a war that threatened continually to overwhelm them. Their story is a lyrical, captivating, timeless portrait of a childhood hurled into wartime and how they had the good fortune and belief in themselves to survive.
Download or read book Does It Fart written by Nick Caruso and published by Hachette Books. This book was released on 2018-04-03 with total page 142 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the scientist duo behind True or Poo?, their original New York Times bestselling sensation--a scientifically precise, fully illustrated, utterly hilarious guide to animal flatulence. Dogs do it. Millipedes do it. Dinosaurs did it. You do it. I do it. Octopuses don't (and nor do octopi). Spiders might do it: more research is needed. Birds don't do it, but they could if they wanted to. Herrings do it to communicate with each other. In 2017 zoologist Dani Rabaiotti's teenage brother asked her a most teenaged question: Do snakes fart? Stumped, Rabaiotti turned to Twitter. The internet did not disappoint. Her innocent question spawned the hashtag #doesitfart and it spread like a noxious gas. Dozens of noted experts began weighing in on which animals do and don't fart, and if they do, how much, how often, what it's made of, what it smells like, and why. Clearly, the public demands more information on animal farts. Does it Fart? fills that void: a fully authoritative, fully illustrated guide to animal flatulence, covering the habits of 80 animals in more detail than you ever knew you needed. What do hyena farts smell especially bad? What is a fossa, and does it fart? Why do clams vomit but not fart? And what is a fart, really? Pairing hilarious illustrations with surprisingly detailed scientific explanations, Does it Fart? will allow you to shift the blame onto all kinds of unlikely animals for years to come.
Download or read book Ape and Essence written by Aldous Huxley and published by Ivan R. Dee. This book was released on 1992-08-01 with total page 224 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: When Aldous Huxley's Brave New World first appeared in 1932, it presented in terms of purest fantasy a society bent on self-destruction. Few of its outraged critics anticipated the onset of another world war with its Holocaust and atomic ruin. In 1948, seeing that the probable shape of his anti-utopia had been altered inevitably by the facts of history, Huxley wrote Ape and Essence. In this savage novel, using the form of a film scenario, he transports us to the year 2108. The setting is Los Angeles where a "rediscovery expedition" from New Zealand is trying to make sense of what is left. From chief botanist Alfred Poole we learn, to our dismay, about the twenty-second-century way of life. "It was inevitable that Mr. Huxley should have written this book: one could almost have seen it since Hiroshima is the necessary sequel to Brave New World."—Alfred Kazin. "The book has a certain awesome impressiveness; its sheer intractable bitterness cannot but affect the reader."—Time.
Download or read book The House on East 88th Street written by Bernard Waber and published by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. This book was released on 2022-09-20 with total page 52 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "It is called the Elemental Control. And it is failing. The elements are mere ghosts of their full forces. And, as it fails Delphi, I start to die. I need you to save me, the future of your home, and a very powerful boy." Earth, fire, water, wind. Four elements that make up everything Delphi knows to be normal. All her life, she has been a servant to a mysterious man named The Master - until The Master comes to her island home and asks her to undertake a dangerous task in the far-off, elemental lands. Delphi is alone in places with strange secrets and rules, with the fate of her world on her shoulders, and although she makes many friends she also attracts more dangerous attention... Leo has never known home - and he isn't exactly a normal boy. When he is kidnapped by a nameless man who tries to force Leo to reveal his powers, he finds he has nobody he can turn to - except a girl in his dreams called Delphi... Can Delphi find the Elemental Stones to bring the Control back into balance? Will she get to Leo's prison in time? And, when faced with the ultimate challenge, can Delphi find the inner strength to save everything she loves? A story about courage, friendship and finding where you belong. About the Author Esme Carpenter started writing at the age of twelve and since then has never looked back. Despite completing a five-book series by fifteen, she couldn't stop, resulting in a backlog of fantasy and science-fiction novels decaying on her harddrive, awaiting liberation (and possibly a good edit). An avid reader all her life, Esme always enjoyed stories. Her love of both writing and reading led her to the University of East Anglia to study English Literature and Creative Writing; she graduated summer 2011. Esme enjoys, amongst other things, comic books, video games and music, the latter of which gives her the best inspiration and is often used to drive her stories. At present she is writing a graphic novel. Against the Elements is her debut novel, written when she was fifteen and edited at the tender age of twenty-one. Esme lives in York, England, with a ridiculous amount of nerdy memorabilia.
Download or read book Watchers written by Dean Koontz and published by Penguin. This book was released on 2008-05-06 with total page 404 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A “superior thriller”(Oakland Press) about a man, a dog, and a terrifying threat that could only have come from the imagination of #1 New York Times bestselling author Dean Koontz—nominated as one of America’s best-loved novels by PBS’s The Great American Read. On his thirty-sixth birthday, Travis Cornell hikes into the foothills of the Santa Ana Mountains. But his path is soon blocked by a bedraggled Golden Retriever who will let him go no further into the dark woods. That morning, Travis had been desperate to find some happiness in his lonely, seemingly cursed life. What he finds is a dog of alarming intelligence that soon leads him into a relentless storm of mankind’s darkest creation...
Download or read book Flying Lessons Other Stories written by Ellen Oh and published by Yearling. This book was released on 2018-08-14 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Whether it is basketball dreams, family fiascos, first crushes, or new neighborhoods, this bold short story collection—written by some of the best children’s authors including Kwame Alexander, Meg Medina, Jacqueline Woodson, and many more and published in partnership with We Need Diverse Books—celebrates the uniqueness and universality in all of us. "Will resonate with any kid who's ever felt different—which is to say, every kid." —Time Great stories take flight in this adventurous middle-grade anthology crafted by ten of the most recognizable and diverse authors writing today. Newbery Medalist Kwame Alexander delivers a story in-verse about a boy who just might have magical powers; National Book Award winner Jacqueline Woodson spins a tale of friendship against all odds; and Meg Medina uses wet paint to color in one girl’s world with a short story that inspired her Newbery award-winner Merci Suárez Changes Gear. Plus, seven more bold voices that bring this collection to new heights with tales that challenge, inspire, and celebrate the unique talents within us all. AUTHORS INCLUDE: Kwame Alexander, Kelly J. Baptist, Soman Chainani, Matt de la Peña, Tim Federle, Grace Lin, Meg Medina, Walter Dean Myers, Tim Tingle, Jacqueline Woodson “There’s plenty of magic in this collection to go around.” —Booklist, Starred “A natural for middle school classrooms and libraries.” —Kirkus Reviews, Starred “Inclusive, authentic, and eminently readable.” —School Library Journal, Starred “Thought provoking and wide-ranging . . . should not be missed.”—Publishers Weekly, Starred “Read more books by these authors.” —The Bulletin, Starred
Download or read book The Magical Fruit written by Jo Nesbo and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-11-11 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: "When a Russian billionaire robs the Norwegian Gold Reserve and melts the last remaining gold bar into the Premier Soccer League trophy, it's up to Doctor Proctor, Nilly and Lisa to recapture it"--
Download or read book The Solace of Leaving Early written by Haven Kimmel and published by Anchor. This book was released on 2002-07-23 with total page 261 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Using small-town life as a springboard to explore the loftiest of ideas, Haven Kimmel’s irresistibly smart and generous first novel is at once a romance and a haunting meditation on grief and faith. Langston Braverman returns to Haddington, Indiana (pop. 3,062) after walking out on an academic career that has equipped her for little but lording it over other people. Amos Townsend is trying to minister to a congregation that would prefer simple affirmations to his esoteric brand of theology. What draws these difficult—if not impossible—people together are two wounded little girls who call themselves Immaculata and Epiphany. They are the daughters of Langston’s childhood friend and the witnesses to her murder. And their need for love is so urgent that neither Langston nor Amos can resist it, though they do their best to resist each other. Deftly walking the tightrope between tragedy and comedy, The Solace of Leaving Early is a joyous story about finding one’s better self through accepting the shortcomings of others.
