Download or read book America s Dumbest Criminals written by Daniel Butler and published by HarperChristian + ORM. This book was released on 1995-09-29 with total page 173 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: 100 crazy stories of America's dumbest criminals. WARNING: The crimes you are about to read are true. The names have been changed . . . to protect the ignorant. Here is the ultimate collection of the most incredibly stupid and painfully dumb attempts at crime ever brought together. The woman who invalidated her winning $5,000 lottery ticket by altering it to match the $20 prize number The accused vending-machine thief who paid his $400 bail entirely in quarters The streaking robber who thought clothes would make him more identifiable The convenience store thief who got away with just a hotdog, only to end up in the parking lot choking on the wiener

Download or read book The World s Dumbest Criminals written by Jack Kirchhoff and published by HarperCollins Publishers. This book was released on 2019-10-29 with total page 336 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Two men in England photographed each other stealing thousands of dollars from gambling machines. An armed man successfully robbed a pharmacy and was captured after he boasted about it on social media. A burglar spent some time cleaning the house he was robbing, and even restocked some groceries, before he was discovered fast asleep in the homeowner’s bed. (“He did burn an old saucepan, but that happens!” reported the homeowner.) Two drunken louts stole a penguin from an aquarium and tried to release him into a canal when they were sober (he was returned to the polar enclosure, unharmed). Another man attempted to hold up a bank using a cucumber as a weapon. Two fellows tried to rob a bar where the town’s police department was holding a retirement party for one of its members. For every Moriarty, there are a thousand stupid criminals who get caught in the act, or who boast about their success on social media, or whose acts are so outrageous that the police have little difficulty tracking them down. Throughout history, these criminals have been easily captured, and have sometimes even died during an ill-fated escape. New criminals are apprehended every day thanks to their own genius, their exploits captured on YouTube and Instagram. Veteran reporter Jack Kirchhoff has recorded more than one hundred of the most ridiculous, absurd and bizarre crimes that have landed on the police blotter in recent years. Hilarious and outrageous, this book will make you shake your head and perhaps second-guess your own plans to commit petty larceny.

Download or read book The World s Dumbest Criminals written by and published by Thomas Nelson Inc. This book was released on with total page 168 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt:

Download or read book Stupid American History written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2009-04-21 with total page 274 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New York Times Bestseller: Welcome to the land of the free, the home of the brave—and, apparently, the dumb, bizarre, and gullible . . . Did you know that . . . *John Tyler was on his knees playing marbles when he was informed that Benjamin Harrison had died and he was now president of the United States *For reasons still unknown, Texas congressman Thomas Lindsay Blanton, a Presbyterian Sunday school teacher and prohibitionist, inserted dirty words into the Congressional Record in 1921—for which his colleagues officially censured him by a vote of 293-0 *Two US presidents were indentured servants—and one of them ran away and wound up with a $10 reward posted for his capture From Columbus to George W. Bush, the bestselling coauthor of America’s Dumbest Criminals leads us through the many mythconceptions of our nation’s history in this lively book, exposing lots of entertaining moments of idiocy and inanity along the time line.

Download or read book Stupid Sports written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2013-06-18 with total page 462 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From political pandering and clunky criminals to historical hiccups, the jokes, wacky anecdotes, and inane quotes in Leland Gregory’s Stupid-themed anthologies showcase the best of human nature at its worst. In Stupid Sports, Leland now presents more than 200 sports-related idiotic moments featuring stupid sports laws and regulations, quotes, and athlete interactions with the law, fellow teammates, celebrities, and more, such as: “This could ruin my career.” —Darryl Strawberry to Tampa, Florida, police officers after being arrested for solicitation of prostitution and possession of cocaine on April 15, 1999. Featherweight boxer Richard Procter jumped into the ring at the World Sporting Club in London on July 11, 2004, and tossed off his robe to thunderous applause—only to realize he had forgotten his shorts. Fred Lorz finished first in the marathon in the Summer Olympics of 1904. Just before he was handed the gold medal, it was discovered that a car drove him 11 miles of the race.“Winfield goes back to the wall. He hits his head on the wall and it rolls off! It’s rolling all the way back to second base! This is a terrible thing for the Padres!” —Jerry Coleman, Padres broadcast announcer

Download or read book Punishment Without Crime written by Alexandra Natapoff and published by Basic Books. This book was released on 2018-12-31 with total page 320 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A revelatory account of the misdemeanor machine that unjustly brands millions of Americans as criminals. Punishment Without Crime offers an urgent new interpretation of inequality and injustice in America by examining the paradigmatic American offense: the lowly misdemeanor. Based on extensive original research, legal scholar Alexandra Natapoff reveals the inner workings of a massive petty offense system that produces over 13 million cases each year. People arrested for minor crimes are swept through courts where defendants often lack lawyers, judges process cases in mere minutes, and nearly everyone pleads guilty. This misdemeanor machine starts punishing people long before they are convicted; it punishes the innocent; and it punishes conduct that never should have been a crime. As a result, vast numbers of Americans -- most of them poor and people of color -- are stigmatized as criminals, impoverished through fines and fees, and stripped of drivers' licenses, jobs, and housing. For too long, misdemeanors have been ignored. But they are crucial to understanding our punitive criminal system and our widening economic and racial divides. A Publishers Weekly Best Book of 2018

Download or read book United Kingdumb written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2010-09-07 with total page 162 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From absurd 911 calls to presidential philosophizing to his New York Times best-selling Stupid American History, Leland Gregory generates the best laughs by exposing the worst of human nature. Now, Gregory--sets his sights across the pond to the United Kingdom to skewer Brits, Scots, Irish, and Welsh alike in United Kingdumb: Idiots from the British Isles. In United Kingdumb: Idiots from the British Isles, Gregory turns his eye to countryside Britons, London aristocrats, kilted Scotsmen, leprechaun-loving Irish, and the wily Welsh, all of whom are a breed apart in their affinity for the idiotic and inane. Because the stories Leland chronicles are just that unbelievable, each anecdote, quote, or factoid is presented with relevant background information--including its verified news source.

Download or read book Crimes and Misdumbmeanors written by Daniel R. Butler and published by Rutledge Hill Press. This book was released on 1998 with total page 228 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Crimes and MisDumbMeanors is the fourth in the highly successful series of books based on the America's Dumbest Criminals™ television series.

Download or read book Idiots in Charge written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2007-08-01 with total page 306 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Nothing is more important in the face of a war than cutting taxes." --Tom DeLay, America's Community Bankers meeting, March 12, 2003 * After revealing absurd 911 phone calls and America's dumbest criminal antics, former Saturday Night Live writer Leland Gregory skewers political pandering and pen-pushing philosophizing. Leland Gregory generates the best laughs by exposing the worst of human nature. Inside Idiots in Charge: Lies, Trick, Misdeeds, and Other Political Untruthiness Gregory offers more than 250 accounts of bumbling bureaucrats on both sides of political party lines: * David Spellman became mayor of Black Hawk, Colo., on July 12, 2006, a week after pleading guilty to felony menacing and third-degree assault for pistol-whipping his wife with a handgun and firing three shots in 2005. * County officials in Vermillion, Ind., were told by state homeland security officials in July 2006 to stop using the special emergency-only highway message boards to advertise their charity fish fries and spaghetti dinners. * District 1 Town Councilor David Watson resigned from his position as council vice chairman on January 23, 2007, after unintentionally forwarding an e-mail to 18 members of the New Elementary School Building Committee. The e-mail contained nine embedded images of topless women under the heading "This Is National Women's Breast Awareness Day." The only other text in the e-mail read, "Beats . . . Martin Luther King Day, doesn't it?"

Download or read book America s Dumbest Criminals written by Daniel R. Butler and published by Gramercy. This book was released on 2000 with total page 472 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: From the hit syndicated television show come 200 stories of fumbling felons, clumsy crooks, and ridiculous robbers--all the crimes are true, but the names have been changed to protect the stupid!

Download or read book America s Dumbest Criminals written by Daniel R. Butler and published by Thomas Nelson Inc. This book was released on 1995 with total page 242 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: This hysterical collection of stories of actual crimes committed by clumsy#xD;crooks and fumbling felons will have you laughing out loud at painfully dumb#xD;attempts at crime. Illustrated.

Download or read book Stupid California written by Leland Gregory and published by Andrews McMeel Publishing. This book was released on 2010-04-13 with total page 162 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Best-selling author Leland Gregory--who has so entertainingly highlighted humanity's stupidity in the areas of crime, business, love, politics, cruelty, and history--is back with Stupid California. This time, Gregory builds a case for the common suspicion that Californians, from movie moguls to beach bums, have a special affinity for idiocy. Culled from print, online, and broadcast sources, Stupid California is a hilarious collection of true stories, trivia, and factoids about the Golden State, such as: * "California's state animal is the California grizzly bear, which is also on the state flag. The bear was honored in 1953, a full 31 years after the last known bear in the state was killed." * "During the 1980s, in a bold stroke against terrorism, the Chico City Council banned nuclear weapons, enacting a mandatory $500 fine for anyone detonating a nuclear weapon within city limits." Silly, shocking, weird, and amusing, Stupid California is ideal for both kinds of people--those who love California and those who hate it.

Download or read book The World s Dumbest Criminals written by Daniel Butler and published by Thomas Nelson. This book was released on 1997-07-13 with total page 170 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: First came the New York Times bestseller America's Dumbest Criminals™, then there were more amazing tales of stupid but true crimes in Wanted! Dumb or Alive. In this book, hilarious criminal cluelessness is uncovered on every continent in one hundred new stories.

Download or read book You Can Get Arrested for that written by Rich Smith and published by Random House. This book was released on 2007 with total page 324 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: What started out as an innocent board game inspired Rich Smith to undertake a daring crime spree across the United States -a journey to break the dumbest American laws on the statute books.In the Land of the Free, it is illegal to-* Lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory (South Dakota)* Play a trumpet with the intention of luring someone to a store (California)* Catch a fish with a lasso (Tennessee)Rich's first problem was narrowing down the huge choice of laws to just twenty-five. The second was persuading his mate Bateman to come along, to do some of the driving -and possibly provide bail money. The third was finding someone who was willing to help him break his first law- one of San Francisco's oldest statutes, which related to oral sex. No, Bateman couldn't help with that one.Join Rich as he attempts his one-man crime wave -almost as difficult as a one-man Mexican wave.

Download or read book The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America written by Matt Kracht and published by Chronicle Books. This book was released on 2019-04-02 with total page 178 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: National bestselling book: Featured on Midwest, Mountain Plains, New Atlantic, Northern, Pacific Northwest and Southern Regional Indie Bestseller Lists Perfect book for the birder and anti-birder alike A humorous look at 50 common North American dumb birds: For those who have a disdain for birds or bird lovers with a sense of humor, this snarky, illustrated handbook is equal parts profane, funny, and—let's face it—true. Featuring common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Matt Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with humorous, yet angry, ink drawings. With The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America, you won't need to wonder what all that racket is anymore! • Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more. • The essential guide to all things wings with migratory maps, tips for birding, musings on the avian population, and the ethics of birdwatching. • Matt Kracht is an amateur birder, writer, and illustrator who enjoys creating books that celebrate the humor inherent in life's absurdities. Based in Seattle, he enjoys gazing out the window at the beautiful waters of Puget Sound and making fun of birds. "There are loads of books out there for bird lovers, but until now, nothing for those that love to hate birds. The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America fills the void, packed with snarky illustrations that chastise the flying animals in a funny, profane way. " – Uncrate A humorous animal book with 50 common North American birds for people who love birds and also those who love to hate birds • A perfect coffee table or bar top conversation-starting book • Makes a great Mother's Day, Father's Day, birthday, or retirement gift

Download or read book The World s Dumbest Criminals written by Daniel R. Butler and published by . This book was released on 1997-10 with total page pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: First came America's Dumbest Criminals, the national bestseller that offered what ADC's crack research team believed to be the ultimate collection of the most incredibly stupid and painfully dumb attempts at crime ever compiled. However, dumb crime was spotted everywhere by an enlightened police force and public, and so Rutledge Hill Press published more incredible tales in Wanted! Dumb or Alive.

Download or read book Heist written by Jeff Diamant and published by Sourcebooks. This book was released on 2015 with total page 0 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Revised edition of the author's Heist! 2002.