Download or read book 5 000 Sidesplitting Jokes and One Liners written by and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2013-11-01 with total page 312 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: “I’ll never forget the words my granddad said before he kicked the bucket. He said ‘Grandson, watch how far I can kick this bucket.’” “The key to any marriage is spontaneity. You’ve got to be ready to leave at any time.” Bringing together some of the funniest, wittiest, and most cutting jokes the world over, Grant Tucker’s volume is the definitive collection of the quips comedians call “one-liners.” Short, sweet, and undeniably clever, one-liners hold a special place in the history of comedy, and the rise of Twitter and social media seems to have ushered in a new era of this comedic art form. With most people expressing themselves in 140 characters or less, there seems no better time to celebrate Grant’s collection and the immortal one-liner. Side-splittingly funny, 5,000 Sidesplitting Jokes and One-Liners has all the puns, zingers, and witty remarks you could ever ask for—and many you’d never dream of asking for. “My granddad has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.” “A dyslexic man walks into a bra.” “Corduroy pillows: they’re making headlines!” “Promises are a bit like babies: fun to make but hard to deliver.” “Schizophrenia—together I can beat it.” “Drugs are never the answer. Unless the clue is: ‘Narcotics, five letters.’”
Download or read book 5 000 Laugh Out Loud Jokes and One Liners written by and published by Skyhorse. This book was released on 2021-10-19 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Thousands of jokes and zingers to expand your repertoire and become a master of comedy! Bringing together some of the funniest, wittiest, and most cutting jokes the world over, Grant Tucker’s volume is the definitive collection of the quips comedians call “one-liners.” Short, sweet, and undeniably clever, one-liners hold a special place in the history of comedy, and the rise of Twitter and social media seems to have ushered in a new era of this comedic art form. With most people expressing themselves in 140 characters or less, there seems no better time to celebrate Grant’s collection and the immortal one-liner. Side-splittingly funny, 5,000 Sidesplitting Jokes and One-Liners has all the puns, zingers, and witty remarks you could ever ask for—and many you’d never dream of asking for. “My granddad has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.” “A dyslexic man walks into a bra.” “The key to any marriage is spontaneity. You’ve got to be ready to leave at any time.” “Corduroy pillows: they’re making headlines!” “Promises are a bit like babies: fun to make but hard to deliver.” “Schizophrenia—together I can beat it.” “Drugs are never the answer. Unless the clue is: ‘Narcotics, five letters.’”
Download or read book 5 000 Sidesplitting Jokes and One Liners written by and published by Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.. This book was released on 2013-11-06 with total page 313 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A treasury of the world's top-selected one-liners and jokes, published for today's generation of social media comics, includes such puns, zingers and witty remarks as "A dyslexic man walks into a bra." By the creator of The Margaret Thatcher Book of Quotations. Original. 10,000 first printing.
Download or read book The Big Book of Dad Jokes written by Joe Kerz and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-04-19 with total page 389 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Hundreds and Hundreds of Jokes that Will Drive Your Family Crazy Nothing is more hilarious for moms, sons, and daughters than the bad jokes dads tell. (Well, at least he thinks they're hilarious . . .) Have you ever noticed when you’re out to dinner and your dad takes it upon himself to antagonize your server with a lame joke? Has he ever made a pun that made everyone at a family gathering roll their eyes? Has he ever made a corny comment about things simply lying around the house? If you answered “yes” to any of the following, you’re not alone. Dad jokes are at the center of all dad interactions and the core of every dad’s persona. This comedic compendium compiles more than eight hundred of the best jokes dads can use to hone their craft and ensure maximum eye rolling. Included within are jokes such as: Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food; no atmosphere. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room? Odor in the court. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant. What kind of tea is hard to swallow? Reality. With Dad Jokes, give your dad the gift of becoming the least funny/most "punny" guy in the room.
Download or read book The Mammoth Book of One Liners written by Geoff Tibballs and published by Robinson. This book was released on 2012-06-07 with total page 607 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A collection of 10,000 side-splitting one-line jokes arranged in categories from bestselling humour editor Geoff Tibballs. 'Is my wife dissatisfied with my body? A small part of me says yes.' 'Letting the cat out of the bag is a whole lot easier than putting it back in.' 'I read somewhere that 26 is too old to still live with your parents. It was on a note, in my room.'
Download or read book 365 Knock Knock Jokes written by Robert Myers and published by Sterling Publishing Company, Inc.. This book was released on 2006 with total page 136 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Wide-ranging collection of illustrated knock-knock jokes.
Download or read book 500 Wacky Knock Knock Jokes written by Dora Wood and published by . This book was released on 1992 with total page 148 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Knock-knock. Who's there? Mikey. Mikey who? Mikey won't fit this lock! Knock-knock. Who's there? Pecan. Pecan who? Pecan someone your own size! And hundreds more!
Download or read book The Best Joke Book Period written by William Donohue and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2014-11 with total page 208 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Discover hundreds of jokes for every occasion! Why was the limbo dancer shocked when his wallet was stolen right out of his back pocket? Because he didn't think anyone could stoop so low. The ultimate collection of the world’s greatest funnies, The Best Joke Book (Period) keeps you laughing for hours on end. Inside, you'll find hundreds of jokes that are guaranteed to stir up a room full of smiles, including knock-knocks, witty puns, and one-liners. Complete with hilarious quotes from celebrities like Jon Stewart, Lewis Black, and Jerry Seinfeld, everyone will revel in each gut-busting moment. So whether you’re looking to add a few jokes to your repertoire, impress your buds, or improve your banter, this sidesplitting book arms you with the perfect joke for any occasion!
Download or read book An Unofficial Joke Book for Fortniters Sidesplitting Jokes and Shenanigans from Salty Springs written by Brian Boone and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2019-05-14 with total page 160 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Jump out of the Battle Bus and jump into more than eight hundred side-splitting jokes! Jump out of the Battle Bus and jump into more than eight hundred side-splitting jokes! Jokes for Fortniters is an all-new, laugh-out-loud book of jokes for you and your squad. From Battle Royale puns and wordplay to funny one-liners that will have you dancing, this hysterical book has the cleverest jokes about Fortnite and game play. Cackle your way to victory with the funniest, craziest, and silliest jokes you can fire off to everyone on the island! Inside you will find funny gags such as: What do a door and a new Fortnite player have in common? They both get “knocked” a lot. What happens after you drink too much Slurp Juice? You burp juice! What kind of pop should Fortniters never drink? Shield pop! Where do Fortniters sleep? In a nite fort! For kids ages eight and up, this is the perfect book for at home, at school, or any battle royale! You’ll enjoy telling these silly jokes to your friends and family. Get extra laughs from silly illustrations throughout!
Download or read book Old Jews Telling Jokes written by Sam Hoffman and published by Metro Publishing. This book was released on 2012-10 with total page 256 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A grasshopper walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and says, 'You know we have a drink named after you?' The grasshopper replies, 'You have a drink named Stanley?' Just one of the gags in this book, many of which explore Jewish themes.
Download or read book The Ultimate Dad Joke Book written by Hugh Murmie and published by . This book was released on 2020-05-10 with total page 108 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: New for 2020! Easy Father's Day gift for your favorite guy! The Ultimate Dad Joke Book is jam packed with family friendly, clean and hysterical jokes that are great for everyone from your toddler to your great-grandma! Buckle up and get ready for some knee slapping, head shaking and gut busting laughter every time you flip a page. Over 500 hilarious jokes, puns and one-liners Squeaky clean, family safe jokes for kids (and adults) of all ages Great selection of time honored classics and all new jokes for 2020 Grab your copy today and channel your inner dad with some amazingly groan worthy humor bombs!
Download or read book Laugh Out Loud Jokes for Kids Laugh Out Loud Jokes for Kids written by Rob Elliott and published by Baker Books. This book was released on 2010-08-01 with total page 128 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Over 2 million sold! USA TODAY bestseller! Wall Street Journal bestseller! What happens to race car drivers when they eat too much? They get indy-gestion. Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids provides children ages 7-10 many hours of fun and laughter. Young readers will have a blast sharing this collection of hundreds of one-liners, knock knock jokes, tongue twisters, and more with their friends and family! This mega-bestselling book will have children rolling on the floor with laughter and is sure to be a great gift idea for any child.
Download or read book Reader s Digest Laughter is the Best Medicine All Time Favorites written by Reader's Digest and published by Simon and Schuster. This book was released on 2022-04-05 with total page 328 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: A hilarious collection of the funniest family-friendly jokes, quotes, stories, cartoons, and anecdotes from the past 100 years of Reader’s Digest magazine. A little chuckle every day will keep the doctor away. Editors have mined the Reader’s Digest archives to bring you Laughter Is the Best Medicine, All-Time Favorites, a collection of the most hilarious jokes and anecdotes we’ve come across over the years. As you turn the pages of our newest collection, you’ll realize once again that laughter is always the best medicine. If evolution really works, how come mothers have only two hands? –Milton Berle The game card said: “Name three wars.” My teenage daughter’s response: “Civil War, Revolutionary War, and Star Wars.” Keep your temper. Nobody wants it. –Dearborn Independent Check out this billion-dollar idea. A smoke detector that shuts off when you yell, “I’m just cooking!” Anthropologists have discovered a 50-million-year-old human skull with three perfectly preserved teeth intact. They're not sure, but they think it may be the remains of the very first hockey player. –Jay Leno This collection of laugh-out-loud, clean jokes, one-liners, and other lighthearted glimpses of life—drawn from Reader’s Digest magazine’s most popular humor columns—is sure to tickle the funny bone. Packed with cartoons, quotes, quips, and stories contributed by professional comedians, joke writers, and readers of the magazine, this side-splitting compilation pokes fun at the facts and foibles of daily routines, illustrating that life is often funnier than fiction.
Download or read book The Funny Side of Working from Home written by Robert Frosdick and published by . This book was released on 2020-10-10 with total page 56 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: You'll soon see the Funny Side of Working From Home with this crazy collection of over 200 hilarious jokes, quips, gags and one-liners about all aspect of work; whether it be dealing with the boss, mastering video meetings or working in your pyjamas. From the downright childish to the frankly rude, this side-splitting collection is sure to having to roaring with laughter... long enough to even temporarily forget about that pile of paperwork you were supposed to have finished.We all know that working from home can be a stressful, demanding, thankless, underpaid, frustrating, monotonous and demoralising task - but enough about the positives. Sometimes you deserve to just sit back, put your feet up, relax and have a jolly good laugh and giggle....pretty much like every other day.
Download or read book I Lost My Laugh written by Curtis Brown and published by CreateSpace. This book was released on 2014-07-31 with total page 26 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Come take a Journey with Camden as his laugh leads him on a chase through the city. Along the way, running into obstacles and meeting a friend to help him capture the only thing that gives him the sound of joy. Will Camden ever get his laugh back?
Download or read book Knock Knock Jokes for Kids Laugh Out Loud Jokes for Kids written by Rob Elliott and published by Baker Books. This book was released on 2013-06-15 with total page 126 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Kids can't get enough of laughter--so they can't get enough of Rob Elliot's hilarious joke books! Knock-Knock Jokes for Kids is an all-new collection of knock-knock jokes that will have kids and kids-at-heart rolling in the aisles. Jokes like Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben away for a while but I'm back now With more than 2 million copies sold of his first book, Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids, it's clear that kids (and their adults) are looking for clean, lighthearted humor--and Rob Elliott delivers.
Download or read book The Unintended Consequences of Technology written by Chris Ategeka and published by John Wiley & Sons. This book was released on 2021-10-06 with total page 288 pages. Available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Book excerpt: Discover the technologies and trends that threaten humanity and our planet--- and how we can rein them back in, together In The Unintended Consequences of Technology: Solutions, Breakthroughs and the Restart We Need, accomplished tech entrepreneur Chris Ategeka delivers an insightful and eye-opening exploration of the challenges and the opportunities at the intersection of technology, society and our planet. Detailing both positive and negative technology use cases that on one hand have made humanity better, but on the other hand pose a serious threat to individuals and groups across the world, the author demonstrates how to avoid allowing powerful technologies to overcome our better natures. In this book, you'll: Discover how the forces of capitalism, greed and the myths that surround meritocracy when combined with exponential technology pose an existential risk for humanity. Explore the many exponential technologies such as gene editing, 5G, behavior modification, cyberspace… that have lots of promise but also uncertainty. Consider the future of humanity we wish to collectively build, and whether we can rebuild a capacity for empathy at scale in our tech tools Perfect for founders, business leaders, executives, managers, Chief Technology Officers, and anyone else [i.e. all human beings] responsible for the use and proliferation of advanced technologies. The Unintended Consequences of Technology is a thought-provoking, must-read resource for those at the forefront of our new technological reality.
